Until the World Falls Down - CrazyCatMom86 (2025)

Chapter 1

Chapter Text

1.

You feel his dark red eyes on your back as you laugh at something the young patriar before you says. You turn, flitting your eyes at him, his gaze still fixed on you. You give a slow coy smile, turning back to your coterie of ladies and the young man, feigning interest in what’s being said, waiting for your lover to come for you.

You’re dressed in the style you both prefer; delicate jewelry, luxurious fabrics, all barely covering your body. Like the gowns you wore as a Paramour, deeply low cut in front, high slits over both thighs and your back always bare. Even now, your ladies are made up of Paramours from The Chateau and the young daughters of great houses, all dressed similarly, but never as revealing as you. Astarion enjoys having your beauty on display, a tantalizing glimpse of what only he gets to touch.

Usually, you wear your long wavy hair down, but tonight you wear it up, gathered into a net dotted with hundreds of sparkling gems, a few tendrils of crimson curls left to dangle down your back and framing your face. You sweep one back, focusing on the young man; he’s describing some oddly gruesome event in the last battle he was in. He keeps his attention on you more so than your ladies, just the way he had approached your little menagerie oozed a desire flirt. His cool blue eyes linger on you as he speaks. You smiley indulgently, as is your duty as consort, keeping the highborn, the wealthy, and the powerful of the world happy is your contribution to Astarion’s ambitions. Smiling at their attentions is always the easiest way to placate most of them, but some like to try their hand at a more dangerous game, and it seems this patriar wishes to try his luck at winning your favor. You continue to smile, never faltering as you muse about how silly this boy is, he’d be much better suited to one of your ladies, they’re all tittering at his attention while you could not be more disinterested.

Feather light fingertips brush along your exposed shoulder blades, and you hide the shiver it sends down your spine, a lustful need for more. You marvel at how after 300 years of being his, his slightest touch still makes you tremble. How could anyone be so fortunate as you to be loved by him? You lean back into him, his hand brushing aside a tendril of hair as he whispers into your ear,

"And what has enraptured your attention so, my pet?"

His soft voice in your ear intensifying your desire as you smile and turn your facetonuzzlehis jaw before answering,

"Our friend here was just regaling us of his exploits on your latest campaign. He brought glory to your name and victory to your cause," You gesture at the boy with a gentle wave of your hand before laying it on his as he holds your shoulder.

"Is that so…" Astarion's deep red eyes flick from you to the young man then back again, "And here I am, interrupting. I'm sure you're very deserving of these ladies' attention, but…" One hand gestures vaguely at your ladies as the other slips out from under yours, sliding down to your hip, griping you roughly, "You will have to excuse Talia, I'm in need of myconsort."There’s a jealous growl in his voice and you bask in his possessiveness, the heat in you rising.

He leads you back to the dais, sitting on his throne, beckoning you to sit on his lap so the two of you may survey the room. His eyes keep drifting back to the young man, you sense his disgust at the attention paid to you, laughing internally at his contradictory need to display you and his anger at the hungry looks it garners.

"Any particular reason you whisked me away from our guests?"

"…No. I simply desired your attention,my pet."

"Astarion,” You giggle softly, leaning in to whisper in his ear, “You know I belong only to you." Then you softly place your lips on his pulse, kissing him, attempting to assuage the dark mood he's descending into.

He grips harder at the gentle touch of your cool lips on his warm skin, your husky whisper noting your desire for him. You’re ravenous for his touch, and you’re certain he can sense your growing need for him. Both his hands are on you now, slipping under your gown, teasing you… You bury your face in his neck, breathing heavily, loving the way he always smells of you both, and he chuckles,

"Does my consort grow wearyof the festivities already? Should we retire to our chambers so that I may indulge you?"

"Please…" You gasp and squirm at his amoroustouch. Gods, you'd let him have you here and now if he wanted.

"My apologies your Grace, but they've arrived," An attendant interrupts your fun.

Astarion’s body tenses briefly before gently removing you from his lap, confusion furrowing your brow as you try to think of who could have arrived that would require his immediate attention, let alone warrant interrupting the two of you.

"See that they're brought to my study and made comfortable, I will be there shortly," Astarion stands, looking down at your questioning face, "Do not fret, my love, I simply have some urgent business to attend to. I'll be back to finish what we started." He squeezes you close, bending to bring his lips your neck, his fangs teasing their mark, where your pulse once thrummed, and then he pulls back and walks away, leaving you bereft of his company.

Your gaze drifts over to where the attendant ran off to and there you see an imposing behemoth of a man, dressed richly in dark velvet and damask, a hauntingly lovely woman, almost as tall as him, with ashen blonde hair cascading down her back, a gown of matching dark opulence draped over her thin figure. A strange sense of familiarity washes over you as you look upon the strangers. Though it’s not unusual for Astarion to keep his own counsel in matters of state and war, only involving when prudent, he will tell you his favorite bits of news or confide in you when something is troubling him. But, he’s said nothing of these visitors… You shrug, assuming he will tell you when it’s worth telling you.

You walk back out into the ball, continuing to entertain your guests; the night passes slowly into dawn before you finally retire to your chambers. Astarion is yet to conclude his business and so you climb into a cold empty bed and close your eyes.

2.

You walk through the gardens, enjoying the sun warming your face, contemplating what penance is due your Maiden of Pain; sometime has passed since you last prayed and She is owed proper libations, but you’re unsure what would please her most… Perhaps a visit to the grand temple you’ve built in the city; you could use it as an excuse to visit Ana, your best friend, more a sister than anything, and now the Truescar of your temple, and Madam of The Chateau. She would be delighted to serve you your penance as she had when you were both Paramours. Or maybe Astarion could be persuaded to help you, he does so enjoy participating from time to time. After all, your destiny as Loviatar’s Chosen and he as Bane’s is why the two of you fell in love all those long years ago. You lose yourself, reminiscing on those tumultuous days when you hear someone speaking to you,

"Please excuse the intrusion Mistress, but the Master has summoned you." The meek young lady that serves as your attendant, Maya, is bent downin a deep curtsy, her voice wavering slightly.

You're not the one the servants fear displeasing, and Maya seems frightened, she’s shaking. Astarion usually uses your gentler touch to handle the servants; Maya's trepidation must be coming from him, he must be in an impatient mood to spook her.

"Of course, I'll be there presently," You turn to walk towards the palace but stop, "Does he require me to sit in state with him or does he just need me for something personal?" You're not dressed for state affairs but are unsure if Astarion would be willing to wait for you to change.

"I believe it is something personal, my Lady. He’s in his study." Maya straitens up and approaches you, fussing at your gown and hair, ensuring you're somewhat presentable.

Maya follows you to his study and waits for the guards to announce you before opening the door. Astarion stands, hovering over his desk, his own attendant standing to one side, they both look up as you enter. He smiles, waving his hand at the attendant, dismissing him; he waits for the man to leave, closing the heavy door behind you before speaking,

"Come my darling, I have a surprise for you," He holds his arm out and steps back from his desk, beckoning you to stand between him and the desk, "Our latest territorial conquest has somewhere I think you'd be most interested in visiting." He points at a dark forest with what looks like a fortress built in the middle of it.

"And what is this place?"

"I wish to keep it a secret until we go. We leave in a few days' time." He smiles against your neck and breaths you in, your eyes looking over the map and recognizing a place written on the other side of the forest.

“Dambrath?!” Excitement fills your voice as you turn to him, “We’d be close to Dambrath?”

“Yes, why?”

“It’s the home of my goddess’ worship. Could we go there as well? Please, my love?”

“As my love wishes.”

“Thank you! Thank you!” You quickly kiss his smiling lips, “I must ask Ana if she would like a gift from there!” He shakes his head, leaning down to kiss you again but you turn way before he can, a mischievoussmirk playing on your lips, “And, I have one more thing to ask of you…” He glowers down at your impertinence, waiting for you to continue, “I must serve penance to my Maiden…” your hands slide up his arms, resting softly on his shoulders as you lean back, “Would you indulge me?”

"Always." A wicked smirk spreads over his lips as he reaches up, tangling his fingers into your hair, pulling your head back and to one side.

Tears sting your eyes at the sudden pain, your body responding lustily to his fierce desire to make you hurt. His lips brush against your exposed neck before you feel the sweet sharp pain of his fangs sinking into their scar. You cry out as he begins to devour you, arching your back, pressing into him, pulling him closer.

He rips away, a smeared red grin as he admires your blood dripping down your neck, further still, down your chest, between your breasts. You shiver at the throbbing ache at your neck and in your core, your eyes darken and your lips tremble as he turns you to face the desk and bends you over it. He pushes your gown up over your hips, the sharp edge of the desk digs into the tops of your thighs, his hands grabbing the soft flesh of your behind, digging his fingers in before one hand is taken away only for it to slam back down. The loud smacking echos in your ears as he slaps your ass, the sting radiating heat as another impact comes, your body shuddering as he continues to abuse the same spot.

Every time he brings his hand down onto your tormented skin your lust grows, the agony fueling your body’s response, wetness begins to smear across your inner thighs as his hand smooths over the tender spot,

"Does your goddess require more punishment of you, my sweet?" Astarion growls into your ear, his hardness pushing at your entrance.

"Yes.” You moan, feeling him slide into you, holding still for just a moment, stretching you, filling you.

He grips your hips painfully, his preternatural strength bruising you instantly, as he begins to slam into you. It's a fierce, tortuous pace, and you relish it. His nails digging into your skin, the bite of the wood on your legs with every slam of his hips, driving you closer and closer to your climax. You begin to tense up around him, on the verge of orgasm… But ever the tease, Astarion releases you while pulling out, and you whimper at the sudden loss of his rough fucking.

"Not yet my pet." He commands, turning you around to face him.

He lifts you up onto the desk, laying you back, pushing your thighs wide, pining them downto either side of you, your bottom barely on the desk, your back arching painfully as he slams back into you.The sweet ecstasyfound inyourphysical agony washesover you as he relentlessly pounds into you, every heavy impact of him into you brings you closer. You reach up and grip the edge of the desk, desperately trying to hold on for just a little longer, staving off your little death, but you can’t… You cum, quivering and pulsing intensely around his cock, making him groan as he follows you, emptying himself deep inside of you.

He leans down into your neck, biting into his favorite place, taking just a little bit more of you before straightening back up, still buried within you. He caresses your legs, lifting one to place a gentle kiss on it, smiling down at you, his greatest treasure. The warm familiar blessing of Loviatar washes over you as he pulls out of you, your goddess and you satisfied with your pain.

You look up at his face, still a bloody mess, as you feel for his punctures; they’ve already closed back up into the permanent divots from when he made you his, eternally,

"We should probably clean you up a bit,my love," You sit up, cupping his face in one hand as he nuzzles into your palm.

"Then we should probably do the same for you, my sweet,” He looks down the front of your body, you follow his gaze, seeing just how much you had bled during your fun, "Shall we go to the baths?" He whispers, bending to lick at the sticky red mess.

You giggle, wrapping your arms around him as he effortlessly lifts you up and carries you out of his study. You snuggle into the soft velvet of his coat, breathing in the sent; a comforting mix of his favorite bergamot and your lily oils.

3.

You hadn’t realized how truly far this surprise was, but it makes little difference, for you have been traveling like the monarchs you are. You ride in a luxurious and ridiculously large carriage pulled by the biggest and strongest of horses, a veritable army accompanying you and a baggage train sent days ahead to prepare every stop you will make along the road. You spend days carousing in wealthy port cities, availing yourselves of the hospitality of the elite in their country estates and camping lavishly whenever no other appropriate accommodations can be had.

You never did get a chance to travel the world with him, and now you finally get the chance to see a large swathe of Faerun, tasting all it has to offer ones such as yourselves. And tonight, the final night of your journey will be spent camping once more, this time along the edge of the dark forest. This place brings on a flood of memories from a life long since passed… Nights spent surrounded by the sounds of a flowing river and a whispering forest… Nights spent discovering who the other was…

Astarion leaves you to settle into your tent as he manages something about the next part of your travels. You lounge on a mountain of pillows, letting your mind relive your past with him. You lay with your eyes closed, hearing Astarion return, talking in a hushed voice to his attendant before dismissing him. You open your eyes to see him standing silently, staring into nothingness, lost in thought. You sit up, ready to call out to him when he turns, looking at you, striding over and pushing you back down into the pillows. He begins to kiss you deeply, passionately… Ravenously. You’re unsure what brought on his sudden need for you, but you’re only too happy to give in to him, your body always ready for him.

His hands slip under the front of your gown, exposing your nipples to his fingers as he gently pinches and rolls them before he urges you to slide out of your gown. You smile, shimmying out as he pulls it down your body and tosses it aside. Your hands then begin to open up his shirt, pushing it down off his shoulders and he lets it fall away from him, then he rids himself of his pants before descending onto you again. You open your legs, welcoming him into you, shivering as he hilts himself within you, holding still as he smiles sweetly down at you, kissing you again, and again, taking your breath away.

For the first time in a long while he’s tender in his love making; gently caressing your face, slowly rolling his hips, his forehead pressed to yours, his breath mingling with yours, his body pressed to yours as he holds you as close as he can. It’s like he needs to feel you on every part of him. You wrap your arms around him, willing him to put all his weight on you as he brings his mouth to his place and bites into you, tasting what makes him call you "my sweet".

He rolls you both so that you’re riding him. You slide up and down, keeping his languid pace, enjoying the light friction against that tiny bundle of nerves, his hands caressing every part of you he can reach as you lean heavily onto your hands on his chest, your hair falling to one side, a waterfall of blood red. This moment with him is beautiful and wonderful and you find bliss with him, collapsing onto his chest, breathing him in as he strokes your hair.

But once isn’t enough for him. Again, he rolls on top of you, takes you, fucks you, consumes you. His ravenous need to have you over and over is intoxicating; every fiber of your being is aflame as you give in to his unrelenting embraces. As soon as one orgasm comes to an end, he hungrily fucks you again. Your mind is an imploding star, your body an uncontrollable quivering mess and still he takes more of you. Never has he been so insatiable, but you find yourself unable to stop; every time he reaches for you, you find yourself reaching for him. It hurts to take him, but it’s the sweetest pain you’ve ever known; an unending hunger for more despite feeling like you’re going to shatter.

The sun begins to lighten the fabric of the tent and still the two of you are locked in each other’s arms, still delighting in the others’ body. It is not until dawn has passed into morning that he abates, simply holding you close. Sunlight streams in through an open flap, bathing you in its golden glow, your hair shimmering like fire as you turn to look up into his scarlet eyes… He’s miles away, lost in thought. You wonder if it’s to do with his surprise for you, but you keep silent, wishing this moment could last forever.

Astarion is the first to break the quiet reverie.He breathes into your ear,

"Come darling. We must ready ourselves.”

He stands and you admire his sun kissed skin, the shadows cast on his back from the scars he no longer hides in shame. Your eyes drift down, watching him as he walks over to a large trunk and lifts something out of it before coming back. You stand, letting the sun warm your naked body as he presents you with an exceedingly beautiful gown; deep dark green velvet with golden embroidered vines and leaves, of course fashioned in his favorite style.

"It's lovely!" You exclaim, reachingout to feel the plush softness, "Thank you,my love." You plant a kiss on his cheek and take the gown to put it on. You’ve barely pulled it upwhen he drapes a delicate golden chainover your hips, securing it in place with a matching tiny lock, a possessivelittle smirk spreading acrosshis lips.

You stand back from him, allowing him to admire his gift on you. The colors complimenting your red hair, bronze freckled skin and mismatched red eyes.

“Gods, you’re beautiful.”

You give a twirl, coyly smirking, waiting for him to either pounce on you again or get dressed himself. He gets dressed while you sit, watching him, smiling as your fingers smooth the soft fabric across your thighs, tracing the delicate embroidery. He finishes and holds his hand out for you, ready to leave.

The camp bustles with all the business that must be taken care of on travel this extravagant. All the servants and attendants bow low, stepping aside as the two of you pass, heading into the forest.

4.

You’re unsure how long you walk, but you’re enjoying the familiar sounds of the forest as you travel deeper. Eventually reaching a crumbling ruin of what looks to be a long-forgotten temple to some now nameless god. Astarion walks on in silence, holding your hand, guiding you closer, the forest now falling silent as well, an eerie sense of foreboding creeps into your mind. You look up at your love, his face is hard like stone and you’re afraid to speak, to break this ominous quiet. This whole thing sets you on edge, usually when Astarion presents you with a surprise he’s excited, giddy even, impatient to see your reaction, but not this time…

You walk up the crumbling stairs, through a large open door, into what you can only describe as an altar room; vaulted ceilings with rotting wooden beams, shredded scraps of tapestries fluttering like ghosts along the stone walls, stained glass above windows that still have panes in them, only some lay shattered over the ground, and at the far back wall a shadowy figure you hadn’t noticed before, stands behind the altar stone.

As you walk closer you see it’s a woman; tall and fare with long pale hair flowing down her back and emanatinga power you find familiar. She turns, looking into your eyes and you see it’s your goddess, Loviatar.

“My Maiden of Pain!” You exclaim, dropping into a deep curtsy, Astarion’s hand still clasped in yours.

“So, you’ve brought me my Eternal Chosen…” Her voice is like ice; cold and severe and terrible to be heard.

You look up from your curtsy, confusion furrowing your brow, gazinguponyour patron goddess only to see She isn't looking at you,but at him. Holding his gaze, a sharp smile forming on Her wan features.

"Yes. As promised…" His voice is thick with unspoken emotionashe trails off, not saying something, but Loviatar understands him all the same.

"My Lord is through there." She gestures at the wall behind her as it slides open revealing a small, darkened room with an imposing man looming inside, a single candle burning on a table beside him.

Astarion releases your hand and begins to walk towards the doorway. You react too slowly, feeling his fingers slipping out of your hand before you can squeeze it closed.

"Astarion… what's going on?" He doesn't respond, "Astarion!" You plead, louder as he continues to walk away. You move, trying to step forward, to reach out to him but you can’t. You look down to see a soft blue glow coming up from the floor around you… Terrifyingly familiar as you realize what it is, “…Nightsong…” You whisper in dread, your eyes looking back up at his receding figure, "ASTARION!" Your scream rips your throat as you try to fight the hold the glyphs have on you, your vision blurring with unshed tears.

He doesn't even turn around to look at you as the stone wall slides back into place. Your mind races as you try to make sense of what's happening, but you can't. Cold, hard hands caress your face, pulling you back to what's happening. Your eyes slide up to hers as she smiles down at you. Your face crumples as your tears pour down your cheeks and you choke on your sobs.

"My lovely little Chosen of eternal pain. How I've waited for you." Loviatar whispersin pleasure.

You try to push her away as you scream for Astarion, again and again. You can feel your voice cracking, breaking with each successive scream. Your body shakes and you can hardly suck air into your lungs to scream again. All the while she watches you, her eyes gleaming with an icy fire, drinking in your anguish, never releasing her hold on your face.

"He can't hear you… No one can." Her breath stirs the hair at your ear as she speaks to you, releasing her hold.

You stop screaming, the pain in your heart too much to take. You double over and the sound you make doesn't sound like you. It's something primal, feral, desperate…Broken. Your fingers tangle into your hair, gripping, pulling, trying to rip it out. You dig your nails into your skin, raking them down your face,hoping desperately to make some other pain drown out the anguish of being abandoned by him. And yet you feel none of it…Youcanonly feel her mirth, hear her laughing as your heart and soul shatter.

You look down at your hands and see no bloody scraps of skin, no ripped-out chunks of hair, just your perfect, unmarred flesh. Your gaze drifts up, looking upon Her through a veil of crimson hair, seeing Her vicious smile. Your mind slowly comes to understand what’s happening. How naive you had been to think you had given your goddess what she wanted from you. That the life you were living wasn’t your fate as her destined Chosen, that wasn’t what was promised to her. You were born to suffer more than anyone ever had, or ever would again. You were meant to spend your life in anguish, that’s what was promised to Her.

But that was before you were immortal. Before it would have only been a few centuries…not eternity. You foolishly believed Her when She saidthat simply spending eternity worshiping Her as you always had would be enough… That serving Astarion as She serves her Lord Bane would be enough. You would always feel Her pleasure when you made your offerings to Her, feel Her divine blessings upon you… But you were mistaken. Loviatar was biding Her time until this moment…

"Your infinite torment will be the ultimate libation paid to me as your goddess," She stands tall over you, "And I will relish the agony of my immortal Chosen's eternally breaking heart," She reaches out, sweeping your hair from your face, "The greatest pain any of my worshipers has ever given me. Or ever will…" Her laughter fills your ears as you sink to your knees before collapsing onto the cold stone floor, staring unblinkingly into a vast nothingness.

Your mind slowly fills withthoughts ofAstarion. Every memory, every feeling, every moment, everything in your long life that Astarion touched comes flooding through you. Every sweet caress, every sharp word, every moment of passion, pain and pleasure all twisting to this moment. The glorious last night you spent trapped in his embrace, the bliss of it melting into this betrayal, his abandonment. Your mind unravelingas you desperately grasp onto the promises he made when he transformed you into what you are. He told you he loves you, he said he always would... Aeterna Amantes… Lovers forever... Until the world falls down…

5.

Many years later. (500 or so)

Astarion stands before the glowing circle on the stone floor, the glyphs undulating beneath her body. She looks the same as the day he left her there; crimson hair spread like a pool of blood beneath her, dark green velvet gown, delightfully revealing, barley covering his precious treasure. He could almost reach out and touch her but can't. He stares at her eternal beauty until he feels that chilly presence again.

"Come for a visit, have you?" Her icy yet hauntingly beautiful voice breaks the silence.

"I've come to bargain."

"Bargain?!" She barks out in laughter, "Bargain for what? Her?" Her long pale fingers drag across the back of his neck as She whispers into his ear, "No."

"Name your price. There's nothing in this world I cannot give you,"

"You cannot give back what has already come to pass. 500 years of conquest, ruling over everything. The whole world is now yours, and yours alone. THAT, you can't give back."

"…Please…" Aword he hadn't uttered since he gave Talia up, the ascendant vampire lord knowing only regret from the moment he let go of her hand that day.

"Oh, sweetling…” She pouts in false sympathy before smiling cruelly, whispering into his ear, “You thought it was just her pain I was going to be given in that little deal of yours?” She nuzzles into his neck, breathing in his discomfort, "Oh, no, no, no. I also get your eternal remorse.” She moves to stand before him on the other side of his silent lover, holding his stare, "You were never satisfied with what you had, always longing for more, but you had everything your kind has ever wanted. Everything they've spent millennia striving for..." She smiles, glancing down at her prize, "You performed a profane ritual to become a living vampire, the most powerful one, ever! Giving you the ability, the strength to take the world for yourself," Her eyes slide back up to his, "You made a perfect vampire bride. Something even the ancient Strahd has never been able to accomplish. And you did it on accident. It only worked because it was with her!" She laughs maniacally, "Because I made her for you, because she was destined to be yours." She pauses to revel at his disbelief, "She gave you everything… Oh, but how shortsighted you were... Well, I suppose you weren't given the education necessary to be a patient, all powerful immortal, like your previous master had." His eyes burn into Hers at the mention of Cazador. Loviatar’s laughter grows colder, harsher as She kneels down behind Talia, smoothing back her red hair, revealing the frozen look of anguish on her perfect features.

Astarion stares at the women before him, painfully still, Loviatar's voicefinallybreaking the silence,

“My Lord Bane did well in making you His Chosen, for you have served us both, so very well.” She reaches up, taking his hand, pulling him down to his knees, placing his hand on Talia’s face to feel her ever flowing tears, watching him clench his jaw and grind his teeth to keep from speaking, “You needn’t have made that deal with Him… You would have accomplished everything He wanted of you, and everything you wanted… All you needed was patience and her… And yet, to do as your new Master wanted, you threw her away.” She tosses his hand back out of the glow and away from the face he longs to kiss. She rises to her full height, gliding over to stand between Astarion and Talia, “But thank you, for my immortal Chosen. For without you, she would have escaped this fate years ago.”

Loviatar fades away, leaving Astarion to his thoughts. He thinks of how Talia had been his from the moment he set eyes on her, and he had been hers the moment she set eyes on him; inextricably drawn to one another through their fates as Chosen… or at least for him, his potential to be the greatest of Bane’s Chosen. How they had found each other and survived through impossible odds. How she gave him everything he asked of her, demanded of her, always with a smile. How she empowered him, submitted to him… loved him. And just as she had told him she would, she gave him the power to conquer the world…

Years of political maneuvering, intrigue and even eventually war had brought most of Faerun under his rule, pleasing his god, Bane. But Astarion had grown comfortable from easily taking over most of the continent, relaxing into a leisurely life with his beloved by his side, enjoying all that his victories had brought them. He planned to dominate the world, thinking it would be as easy as the rest had been, but it wasn’t. His campaigns grew more difficult, and Astarion hated being thwarted, raging at the denial of his destiny, and so he sought more power from his god.

Bane made Astarion an offer… Hand over Talia to her goddess and He will grant him dominion over all Banites the world over, calling them to Baldur’s Gate where Astarion could create an army of vampiric spawn and bring all of Toril to its knees. And so, he did as his master wished and gave away the only joy in his life.

Astarion looks down at Talia's sad, lovely face. He doesn't move, either from not wanting to leave or simply being unable to walk away from his sacrifice, his lost love.

The End

Chapter 2: Prologue

Chapter Text

1.

The stench of rotting fish and stagnant saltwater wafts up the sun-drenched street assaulting your nose as you rush to catch up to Ana, your long hair flying out behind you as you run. Youcatch up andlink your arm with hers, attempting to slow her down somewhat as you want to enjoy this errand. She looks down at you and rolls her eyes, a small smile forming on her lips as she slows her pace the tiniest bit.

You’ve been sent out to Facemaker’s Boutique to pick up your new personasfor your debut at tomorrow’s masquerade. You have spent the past two years preparing for this newrole at The Chateau de la Douleur, an exclusive club where the rich and powerful come to indulge in more extreme fare than what’s on offer at Sharess’ Caress. Of course, The Chateau is a cover, the truth being a hidden temple to Loviatar.That is where your true training has been:a cleric, well versed in healing due to the nature of your congregation’s devotions and patrons’ proclivities. But not everyone atthe templeis chosen to train as a Paramour and work in The Chateau, you must show a willingness and aptitude for that particular line of work.

Ana begins to hurry again, pulling you along. She would much rather get this over and done with and head to The Elf Song for drinks and gossip: she has no interest in spending an age fussing over clothes, even if it’s with you. You suppose you can hurry along; you’d also like to get there faster to see your new Paramour uniform. You have been endlessly pestering Ana with your guesses as to what you both will be.

The last few ten-days have been spentpracticing your dances to her songs, memorizing the great houses,known patrons and their preferences and how to conduct yourselves at these masquerades. They are the only outside events that the temple allows their Paramoursto work atand a debut is the only way to be introduced into this dark libidinous world. Privacyis paramount among the patrons, you can never reveal who they are or utter their names, as they should never know your true names or see your face.Although it’s an open secret that near every great house has a memberor twothat frequentsThe Chateau, it's just uncouth to speak aboutitin the open.

Upon entering the boutique you’re greeted by a young man, he smiles politely but his disdain is plain enoughas he looks the two of you over, recognition flashing in his eyes as you approach him. Facemaker’soften provides the costumes and other accoutrements required by The Chateau, but being a well-paying customer does not always translate into a desired customer. You ignore him while Ana gives him a delightfully smug smile as you see yourselves to the private fitting area and await his return. He soon comes followedby another worker,both holding delicately wrapped bundles each with a mask balanced on top.The young man strides over to Ana while the other worker stops before you and asks,

“Miss Talia?”

“That’s me!” You nod and smile.

She turns from you and lays your bundle on a table, handingyou the mask whilesheunwrapsthe costume. It’san exquisite black lacquer mask fashioned to look like a cat’s face. It’s a half mask, only coming down to your high cheeks,and topped with two daintyears. The eyes and forehead embellishments are painted with a black paint that sparkleswhen held to the light,and it’s fixed to your face with sturdy rough ribbon, not something that will easily come undone as you danceand work. You hold it to your face and peer into a small hand mirror, your mismatched eyes gleaming violet and jade, accentuated by the rich black of the mask. You look up from the mirror in time to see your gown being lifted up. It’s made offlowing black silk trimmed in black furalong the skirt and down the center front. You put down the mask to hold the gown against you, excited to try it on you rush behind a folding screen and giggle excitedly as you change. Ana calls out to you,

“How’s yours looking so far?”

“I think it’ll turn some heads.” Your eyes widen as you begin to slip the garment up your body, “How about you? I didn’t even look over to see what yours looks like.”

“It should be comfortable to sing in, I’m glad he actually listened to me when I said that was my only requirement. Will you be able to dance in yours?”

“Yes, though some may catch quite a glimpse during my performances…”A devious smile spreads over your full lipsas you look into the full-length mirror.

You take inyour slender small frame, barely covered by the gown, so much of your bronze freckled skin is left bare. The front is a deep cut V that starts just below your navel and comes up to just cover your breasts, held up at your neck on a collar, where a delicate golden bell dangles. The front skirt comes down in a narrow panel to calf length, both sides having high slits just to the side of the front of your hips. The back is only a bottom panel delicately joined to the front of the gown atthe side slits, a soft tail coming from below your back hip dimples.Your wavy, blood red hair tumbles down to just above the tail. Quite the tantalizing visage if you do think so yourself. There’s even matching arm covers. They’re not quite gloves as there’s no hand part, but they cover toyour wrists with soft fur trim and go up over your elbows. You step out to show Ana as she too comes out.

Ana’s isn't quite so revealing but it’s no less exquisite. She’s draped in shimmering layers of sheer copper and bronze fabric. One high slit going up to her hips where a golden rope fastens her skirt closed. Her top is more delicate draping of the same fabric with tiny copper feathers pinning it all into place, leaving her arms and stomach bare, the top lined with soft downy feathers dyed to match the copper and bronze of the fabric. Ana’s lavender skin almost glows against the colors chosen for her, it even matches her blue gray hair as it sweeps the topsof shoulders. You both reach for your masks and put them on, smiling the whole time. Ana has a delicate golden half mask wrought to look like the feathered face of a nightingale.

“I see the Truescar thinks herself clever, you a nightingale and me a cat. How did she ever come up with such creative personas for us to don?” Every word tinged withsarcasm as you sidle up to Ana at the mirror.

“What?” She dramatically gasps, “Do you mean to say that you should be a songbird and I the graceful feline?”

You both double over giggling to imagine your roles reversed. The very thought of Ana and her two left feet being led out for a dance and your off-key warbling to serenade the patrons, it’s ludicrous. Youhurry tochange back and have the clerks send your things ahead to The Chateau as you both head out to the cobbler to pick up the last parts of your ensembles. Two pairs of gilded platforms for Ana and several pairs of dainty dancing slippers for you.

“Now I simply must insist that we GOOUT! I don’t want to think about tomorrow night anymore. Let’s go make some random boys uncomfortable at the tavern.” Ana gives you a wicked smile.

“As you wish Domina!” You exaggeratedly bow to her demands, then taking her hand the two of you laugh and run anddisappear into the crowds of Baldur’s Gate.

2.

Ana paces back and forth in the foyer of The Chateau, her skirt swirling with each turn as she mutters to herself repeating both of your new Paramour names. She’sstill trying to make sure she doesn’t reveal your true names while out working. Delphinium was chosen for Ana and Lycoris for you:named for poisonous flowers, beautiful to behold but painful to consume. You’ve already started to simply call her Delphi while your name doesn’t exactly shorten in a nice way, but its growing on you, you always did have a fondness for lilies.

Delphicontinues to bea bundle of nerves as youallwaitfor the carriage to arrive. You stand quietly, smiling ridiculously as you imagine what the night will bring. Delphi eventually sits with your escorts;two senior members of The Chateau, both well respected among the patrons and usually requested specifically for these masquerades. Mistress Raven and Dominus Aquas patiently speak to Delphi, reminding her that she is well ready for this, that you both are, and that tonight will be a debut for the ages. There hasn’t been a debut in well over ten years, so it’s to be an extravagant event hosted by one of the richest patrons.You try helping her to calm down by kneeling down in front of her so she can pat your hair, she’s always enjoyed treating you like an actual pet.

Finally, a large four horse carriage arrives, it's painted all black with black shutteredwindows and manned by a masked driver and footman. You knew that the location of each masque was kept secret from alltheentertainment brought in, but you didn’t realize the ride would be in total darkness. You climb in and wait for everyone else to settle before the carriage lurches forward. You sit holding Delphi’s hand, even your Elven eyes have trouble making out the figures inside with you, Delphi keeps bringing her face right up to yours, her Drow eyes not faring much better than yours, so you ride in silent anticipation.

The carriagestops and you’re let out onto a tented walkway, not even the outside of the mansion can be seen. You’re ushered into a lavish sitting room to prepare, the music and sounds of the masque drift in as you brush out your loose hair, stretch,and tighten the ribbons of your slippers and mask.Delphi warms her voice and fiddles with her lyre, her nerves finally calming as she concentrates. Dominus and Mistress leave to prepare the ballroom. A hush descends upon the masquerade,the musiciansbegin toplay a low melody and the door is openedforyoubothas you step forward into the awaiting crowd.

A stage along the back wall is set, a small, padded stool flanked by two large golden candelabra for Delphi,the rest isleft open for you. You step up onto the stage first and hold out your hand to gently guide Delphi to her place, everything done gracefully, perfectly. Sheelegantlybowsas you glide to your place awaiting your queue.

Delphi’s sweet voice rises along with herlyre, and your body begins to move, slowly, languidly. You twirl and roll your hips, a devious hint of the pleasures you could give. Soft steps,long slow lifts of your legs, arabesques, all of it showing off the flexible, nubile body you have. You lose yourself in the music, closing your eyes asyoudancetantalizingly,sparkingdesirein those that watch. The soft voice of Delphi fades away as you come into a low bow, your performance coming to an end. You stand and offer ahand to Delphi, andescort her back to the little room to wait further instructions. As soon as the door closes you both squeal and grasp each others’hands.

“I can’t believe it! We did it Lycoris! I didn’t mess it up at all!” Delphi exclaimsand then sighs with relief.

“I know! I was so sure on one of my holds I was going to shake, but I guess I didn’t this time!” You flop onto an overstuffed sofa, pulling Delphi down with you, “Do you think anyone will ask for us tonight?”It’s a low whisper by her ear before you chew the inside of your lower lip.

A debut is the only time Paramours are bid on and spend the whole night with the patron that claims them, and you suddenly fear no one will ask for you…

“Hmmm…” Delphi gives you a sly smile, “I think there’s at least one who’ll ask for you.”

“Really?” You snuggle down and put your head in her lap, slightly soothed by her words.

“Uh huh. He didn’t take his eyes off of you.” She thinks a moment, mindlessly smoothing down your hair, “I think from the moment we walked out intothe ballroom he was watching you…”

“Who was it? Maybe I saw them when we walked back.” You roll to look up at her, your hair falling down her legs.

“He was wearing a harlequin mask. Red and black with gold. Matching motley. Nice lips.” She muses as she tickles your neck.

“I think I saw that mask, but I’m not sure… I really didn’t get to stare out at the audience like you did. What else?” You reach up to pet the soft fluff at the top of her costume.

Delphi goes on to describe a scene of carnal pleasures of every kind,how she could tell the attendants from the revelers by their fullcoverageblack uniforms with black unadorned masks,and that most of the other entertainers were in various stages of undress…You know she cannot wait to gossip endlessly about it when you get home.

Some time passes before the door swings open and four people enter. Dominus and Mistress each have a patron with them, neither is the mystery harlequin. Though you’re slightly disappointed, you’re excited that you’ll have a proper escort for the rest of the night, a successful debut for you both. Your patron is an older gentleman who wears too much perfume but is otherwise inoffensive. Delphi’s is a little younger of a gentleman, a bit rotund for her tastes, though she’d never let that be known. They smile at you both before stepping forward to their respective prizes. Your patron wears a pearly white mask that comes down to sharp points on either side of his jaw, crystal blue eyes gleam pridefully as they drink in your lithe body. You glance over at Delphi to see how she’s fairing, and you can already tell she will have this pudgy man wrapped around her little finger before the night is half over.

Your patronenjoys taking you around the room to be seen by his cohorts,relishing watching their eyes light up with envy as he touches you indiscriminately while you sigh and purr at his touch. Eachlittle group questions youabout whether you’re the type to take punishment or give it. Your eyes sparkle and yousmile demurely, tellingthem ofyour desire to feel the sting of their affections. Pain is your calling. Always has been, for as long as you can remember you’ve been drawn to the sweet feeling of agony. An insatiable hunger nothing, and no one has ever been able to satisfy. Serving your dark goddess andthis forbiddenunderworld is the closest you’ve ever been to feeling satiated.

Somewhere between the second and third group you notice him, the harlequin Delphi spoke of. He’s lounging on a chaise,a tall woman draped elegantly across him, her mouth at his ear as he smiles. You watch, oddly envious, as the woman’s hand wanders suggestively over him. You can’t tell where his eyes are looking so you take the opportunity to watch them. He looks to be taller than you with a slender build, but much more than that is indistinguishable in the dim light filtering through multicolored lanterns. You’re about to look away when you think he looks at you, caught in the act of staring you quickly turn away and pretend to be very invested in the conversation of your escort and his friends. They’re going on about some dull political nonsense while one of them begins to undress the beautiful man sitting in his lap. The previous groups at least kept to more lascivious banter. But continuing to talk politics while fondling someone seems odd.You suppose that’s just how some patronslike to enjoy these hedonistic soirees… Mixing business with pleasure.

Your mind wanders to the handsome harlequin again, your eyes drifting back to where he was lying. He’s still there, the woman having opened the front of his doublet, her hand no longer visible from where you stand, his head tipped back and leaning towards her. You let yourself indulge in imagining what she’s doing to him, and you flush slightly before flicking your eyes back to his face. This time you’re sure he’s watching you, smiling hungrily. You hold his stare, your heart starting to race, heat beginning to flood your body before you’re pulled forward unexpectedly, time to move on to another group.

At least this group has Delphi, perched on the lap of her patron aseveryoneelseenjoysher sharp wit and lovely insults. Her patron hailsyours to take a seat.He flops onto the sofaand pulls you down onto him, arranging you so that you lean back against him, your legs spread over his. You contort yourself to appear sensual and at ease in this awkward position, its what’s expected, you must always appear alluring and willing to please. He fondles you while talking with Delphi’s patron, his hands sliding under the front of your gown to gently twist a nipple and slide up between your legs, lazily circling your clit. It’s too gentle a touch for your preference, but you’re here for his enjoyment, not yours. You can feel his growing excitement and quickening breath. He’s only at it for a few minutesbefore bothof your patronsstand and excuse themselves to take youand Delphiaway into a more secluded alcovetogether.They’re eager tospend the rest of the night indulging in their treats from The Chateau de la Douleur.

3.

The debut was a resounding success.You and Ana have become quite popular, havingalready received your own personal invitations to the next masquerade. Life at the temple has changed for you both. No longer simple Sistersleft to tend to all the menial duties of the temple’s upkeep, you’re now both full members of The Chateau, Paramours for hire.

It’s this new status that has you discover your unmarred fleshis highly desired by patrons.Aresult of your innate talent as a cleric, erasing evidence of your daily prayersand personal indulgences. These patrons like to delude themselves into believing they’re the first to take a lash to your smooth skinand tear it open: you’re only too happy to indulge them. Some are methodical in their tortures while others are haphazard and careless.You’re not sure which type you prefer, as both result in the ecstasy of agony, blessings from your goddess as She takes your pain as glorious tribute.

Ana has been sought by those who wish to be humiliated, and demeaned. Her sweet siren voice dripping with disdain really excites her patrons, andshe so loves to be vicious and cruel.You hear her sometimes, demanding they get down on all fours before her as she caresses their exposed skin with her nails. Her patron’s cries ringing out with yours as you work in a room next to hers. Afterwards she likes to sit with you and tell you all the wonderful details of her work and then waits for you to give her yours. She always wants all the details.

The next masquerade is set a monthfrom now, giving you both time to prepare a new performance. This time you’ll be unaccompanied by any senior Paramours; you won’t be tied to just one patron for the night, and you’re now being entrusted with upholding the good name of The Chateau. It’s alittle daunting, but you’re confident that you can handle it so long as you have Ana as your partner. Masquerades are usually only allowed two Paramours to attendthem, exceptions are made for debuts,and a very select few favored patrons’ private partiesmay hire Paramours. The Truescar insists it protects the illusion of exclusivity, not to mention the privacy of patrons and Paramours alike.

The night of the next masquerade comes, and you’re excited to experience the debauchery again, wondering if your mystery harlequin will be there again... Ana has decided he’s one of the many entertainments hired for the revelry, so it’s entirely possible he’ll be there again. You ready yourselves and await the dark carriage to whisk you away to another night of carnal fun.

You’re in a different ballroom, all the walls are covered in colorful tapestries and thick curtains hiding all possible identifying paintings and portraits, the pretense of secrecy. The air is heavy with incense and the smell of bodies in heat. The room is darkly lit with lanterns covered in red glass; you can see the same various indulgences being had as you escort Delphi over to the stage. The other musicians give way to her as she takes a seat with her lyre, and you take your place in the center of the stage. Her voice rings out sweet and enticing as you move your body. The world fades into the back of your mind as you let the music take you over.

You slowly open your eyes as Delphi’s voice fades, rising from your bow you reach out for her hand yet feel nothing. She has already been claimed by a lovely young patron you recognize from her many visits to The Chateau. Delphi winks at you as she disappears behind a curtain, and you move to the edge of the stage when a hand appears before you. Your eyes follow the hand up to the face to see the harlequin. An intricately painted half mask of black, red and gold, darkly gleaming eyes and a devilish smile greet you. You daintily take the proffered hand and step down. You quiver at his touch and your heart races under his intense stare. You open your mouth to speak to him but feel someone grab your shoulder, forcibly turning you around: it’s a patron who frequents you at The Chateau, so you must give him your full attention. The harlequin’s hand slips from yours as he fades back into the darkened room.

You stalk the edge of the ballroom, this one having curtained alcoves all emitting the sounds of pleasure. Your eyes peer into each one as you pass when you hear Delphi’s voice berating some poor sot, so you stop and peek behind her curtain. She looks up and sees you, she wiggles her eyebrows inviting you in as she mouths ‘Help me with this one’. You slowly enter as she addresses the man laying beneath her foot,

“You have not earned the privilege of tasting me. You must prove you are deserving of me first,” Her garnet eyes sparkle mischievously as she takes your hand to bring you into his view and looks down on him again, “I will have to see if you can satisfy my little pet before I can give you the chance to satisfy me.” She looks at you, bringing her face next to your ear, a hand caressing your neck. The man on the floor would only think she was kissing you but instead she whispers, “Fuck him silly. I want to make him squirm.”

You nuzzle into her neck and whisper back,

“You owe me.”

You pull away from each other, her hand sliding down the front of you until she reaches your skirt. She pulls it to one side so that he can look upon you as you descend. His cock glistening from his desperate need for Delphi. You slide down and tighten up around him immediately, rocking your hips forward and back, rising and falling slowly at first, feeling him tense and groan at your movements. Delphi steps on his hand in disgust,

“Are you going to cum? She’s barley touched you and you’re already going to empty yourself into this little pussy cat?” She twists her foot on his hand, “Pathetic.”

“I’m sorry Domina! I won’t! I won’t until you tell me I can. I swear!” He cries and whimpers as you feel his body struggling to hold on.

“Don’t lie to me now…” She stands, hovering over his face as she bends over to caress yours, mouthing for you to keep going, so you begin to increase your speed. Rolling your hips relentlessly on top of him, you now mouthing to Delphi that he’s about to finish. “I suppose you deserve a little reward for making my kitten purr…” She lowers herself onto his waiting mouth, “Now be a good boy and make me cum.” The moment he tastes her you feel him buck up into you and quiver, you quickly slide up as he empties himself onto his own body. You stand as Delphi pinches his nipples and slaps his now flaccid cock, “Bad boy!” His reply is swallowed up by her body as you watch him writhe at her abuses, his hands reaching for her as she swats them away, “No touching unless I say you can. Now finish me before I get angry.”

She grinds down onto his face and you hear him happily continue. Delphi gives you a wink as you finish cleaning yourself up and turn to go back out into the ballroom. You reach a hand out but notice the curtain is swaying before you even touch it. You poke your head out and turn to see the harlequin slowly walking away from your little alcove. Your eyes drift down to watch his cute butt walk away, flushing at the site, biting your lip and wondering… Was he watching you just now?

The rest of the night is a blur of entertaining patrons. You keep scanning the room for the harlequin, but only ever catch glimpses of him, his eyes meeting yours every time, and every time it makes you growhot and desirous. You can’t think of anyone ever making you so… so distracted before. An indescribableneedpulling you to him…

Dawn comes before you can approachhim again and it’s time you and Delphi went, these places should never be seen in the light of day. The ride home is spent giggling aboutthe night's happenings and your mystery harlequin, maybenext time you’ll actually be able to speak to him.

A couple months pass before another invitation is sent summoning you and Delphi. Anticipation muddles your mind as the day approaches. You constantly bring his smile up behind your closed eyes, the rush you felt when he looked at you, when he held your hand for that brief moment, that sultry walk of his as you ogled his backside. You beg a silent prayer to your Maiden that you might see him again. When the night finally arrives, you’re absolutely beside yourself with excited anxiety, Delphi can barely calm you enough to sit still on the ride over. So, she settles on chastising you for being so enraptured with this dark eyed elf. All you can do is swoon dramatically into her arms and giggle.

Another new ballroom, covered paintings, the smell of incense and bodies filling the air, and yet another song and dance performed before dispersing into the waiting arms of patrons. Half the night seems to slip by without so much as a glimpse of Him. You find yourself in the company of a patron who’s more interested in being a voyeur while fondling you. He has you tucked away on a balcony overlooking the ballroom below. You sit quietly in his lap as his hand does nothing more than grip one breast as he rubs the front of his pants and groans quietly. You look around, trying to stave off boredom when the curtain is pulled back and another couple walks in a large young man with a boisterous laugh, the harlequin hanging off his arm. Your patron looks over and recognizes the tall one, excitedly motioning for them to join you on the floor of pillows. The tall one releases the harlequin, sitting on the pillows on the other side of your patron beginning to chat with him.

You take this unexpectedopportunity to get a closer look at the harlequin. He’s fair haired, silvery gray curls that look perfectly disheveled, a motley checked doublet left open down to his navel, tight hose in matching motley and a wolfish grin as he stands, watchingyour eyes move over him. You can feel the color rising in your cheeks, so you quickly turn to your patron, but he’stoointerested in his friend to pay you any mind, having started to kiss him intensely. You decide to slip off his lap, freeing him to pull his friend down into the pillows and continue their fun. The harlequin sits beside you, leans over, andbrings his face next to yours, his lips mere inches from your ear,

“I enjoyed your dancing.” His voice is a sultry whisper.He moves evencloser, reaching a hand behind you, lightly letting his fingers brush along your lower back, making you want to lean into his touch.

“So, I’ve noticed.” You smile coyly,keeping your eyes focused ahead,trying to hide just how badly you want him to touch you.

“Such a lovely color...” He trails off as hishand begins to fiddle with a lock of your hair, you turn your face towards his, “The color of blood,” He twists it around his finger and gently tugs, “My favorite.”

You let your head tipback at the tug, exposing your neck, his hungry smile makingyou shudder, and you let the feeling consume you. Something about him awakens the darkness in you, the call of the void made flesh. But you’re not here for your own pleasure and you futilely attempt to push down your mountingdesire. Your patron interrupts,pullingyou down to him and his friend, including you in their amorous game, before pushing you onto his friend entirely.

This new patron pulls you into him so he can claim your mouth with his, his tongue sliding between your parted lips. His big hands gripping your waist as your hands slide down his body to find his friend has already undone his pants, his body already exposed to your touch. You grasp his hardness and begin to move your hand up and down slowly, giving him time to decide what he wants from you. His hands move to your hips as he rolls onto his back, bringing you with him before he easily lifts you up onto him, so you straddle him. He holds you still so he can push up into you, groaning at the wet tightness of you engulfing him. He lowers his hips and releases his grip on yours. Your little patron moves behind you to pull open the front of your gown, exposing you to his friend’s waiting hands. He pinches your nipples hard as you arch your back and gasp, enjoying the intense feeling. The one behind you moves away to watch you ride his friend, the harlequin moving to your patron and out of sight. The man beneath you pulls the back of your gown to the side, giving your onlookers an unobstructed view as you work your hips up and down and in slow little figure eights, the bell at your neck tinkling softly.

You hear moans and heavy breathing from behind you as you continue to move your hips. The thought of Him watching you, perhaps for a second time,thrills you.Your body floodswith heat as the patron beneath you digs his fingersinto the soft flesh of your assand begins moving his hips to match your rhythm. You find yourself inching closer, your hips beginning to roll and grind on the patron as he slams up into you harder and faster,his mouth finding a nipple and biting down as he finishesbefore you can. You stillyour body, your frustration making you shake lightly, the fool thinking he’s gotten you off, letting youstay on top of himfor a moment beforehe lifts you up and sets you down next to him.

Youturn,letting your eyesdriftover to where the other two are finishing up, the harlequin pushes himself up and off the patron to sit beside him.You look at his exposed chest and undone pants, wondering how he would feel pressed against you the way he just was on that man. You close your eyes and let your mind fully envision it, let the thought of him make the tension between your legs grow deeper. You feel the tall man next to you sit up as he looks over at his exhausted friend, theysmile at one another, petting their respective playthings, smug satisfaction plastered on their faces. Yousomehow knowthe harlequinstaringatyou, you turn to look at him, letting your eyesmeet his. He holds your gaze, his eyes still hungry, looking at you like he’d devour you given half a chance, and gods you want him to.

4.

An unreasonable amount of time seems to fly by as you impatiently await the next masquerade. The days all blendtogether: wake up, morning prayers, entertain patrons or enjoy a day off with Ana, evening prayers, study, training, bed, do it all again.The only thing making the days somewhat tolerable is that Ana has been assigned to administer your devotions at morning and evening prayers. She is talented not just with words but with the lash. With every strike you feel searing pain followed by divine delight washing over you: it is the greatest of Loviatar’s blessings.

An invitation finally comes, although this one requests Delphinium along with you, she has been booked for a private party, her first as a Paramour. Unfortunately, this means you’ll be going with Mistress Raven, though she had been there for your debut, you have barely spoken two words to her since. She tends to be rather aloof and ignores her junior Paramours most of the time, you expect nothing different from her at the masque.

Upon arrival Raven immediately vanishes into the ballroom, leaving you to fend for yourself. This is the first time you’re not performing so you’re unsure where to start your evening. You quietly walk the perimeter of the ballroom, as no one approaches you, you just end up wandering around eventually making your way into the grand hall. There’re many little rooms branching out while the hall continues on linking the ballroom to the foyer.

You wander into an openemptyroom, your eyes falling upon a large black velvet curtain hanging over what must be a massive paintingwitha small table beneath itlittered with silver platters and crystal glasses. You carefully place a hand on the table, going up on tip toetoreach up, grasping acornerof the lush curtainyou begin to lift it for a peek.

“You know curiosity killed the cat.” His voice shattersthe silence of the room.

You drop the curtain as you spin on your heel, bringing both hands behind you, gripping the edge of the table, the glasses clinking softly.You bite the inside of your lower lip, watching him lithely walk over from the doorway. His open doublet and dangerous smilebeneath the harlequin mask making you think such perverse things,and desire pool in your core.

“And satisfaction brought it back.” Yourvoice responds, steadier than you thought possible, asmall smirk andsassytilt of your head accompany your retort.

“And what sort of satisfaction were you looking for, little pussy cat?” He stops a hands breath from you.

Only now do you realize he’s a full head taller than you, forcing you to tilt your head back to look up at him, finding yourself speechless at his closeness. Your mind flashes with desperate thoughts... Canhehear your heart racing? See the lust in your eyes?Smell your wetness? Every fiber of your being screams for you to lean into him, for him to touch you, hurt you. That dark need deep inside you ravenous for him. His face comes closer,one hand holding your chin as you close your eyes, your lips parting waiting for his… Butbefore his lips find yours there’s a loud bark of laughter as two patrons fall into the room. He moves quickly away from you and turns towards the noise; you recognize the pair as the same ones from your last masque.

“It’s you!!” The tall youngman shouts and points at you. “Come here,” he crooks a finger at you, and you smilingly oblige,“How about you and I find another, more private room?” He wraps his musculararms around you and lifts you up so he can loudly whisper in your ear, “I’ve heard about where your pleasure truly lays…” His teeth dig into your shoulder, hard enough to draw blood, making you gasp, moan and squirm in his tight grip, your eyes clouding with a sudden want for more.

“Excuse me, but you promised me a show if we found her,” The smaller patron pouts.

“So, I did,” He smiles back at his friend then brings his teeth down onto your other shoulder biting even harder, making you quiver, “Seems to me my kitty is game.”

You smile voraciously, your darkness having been woken and now screaming for your pain.Youlet him roughly toss you onto the sofa in the back of the room as his friend and the harlequin settle in for your only performance of the night. The large patronuses his strength to his advantage, gripping you too tightly, bruising your wrists as he pins you down. His hips slamming into your thighs, his teeth finding untouched spots to clamp down on. His hands moving to push your legs down to either side of you, your flexible dancers bodycontorting to accommodate him.

All the while the harlequin keeps his eyes on you, licking his lips, watching your blood slowly drip down your body, smeared by the rough hands of your patron. You cannot help the genuine moans and whimpers of pleasure that his rough fucking elicits from you while being watched by the harlequin. By the time he’sdone you feel almost satisfied, few have the strength or stamina to doallof those things. You look over to see the other patron all but spent in the arms of the harlequinas he continues to stroke the shaking man in his lap. Those hungry dark eyes linger on your ruined state.Your darkness wants more, willing him to come to you, to satiate himself with you, to ruin you more.

5.

A grueling winter rages through Baldur’s Gate, so the upper city comforts itself the only way the rich and powerful can, with a never-ending parade of balls, feastsand masquerades. Your schedule is packed: several masques and almost too many patrons at The Chateau for you to handle. You barely have time to even see Ana outside of being summoned as Delphinium and Lycoris. You’re starting to forget your real name, so rarely do you hear it.

You haven’t seen much of your harlequin either.You’ve only been able to see him in the company of the two that always seek you both out.There’s been another harlequinstalking around the masques:identical costume but silver embellishments with black and white motley instead. Something about him just irritates you, like he’s trying to be your harlequinbut just doesn’t get it quite right. He’s sniffed around you once or twice, but thankfully you could simply turn your back on him, leaning heavily on the idea that the entertainment shouldn’t be fraternizing. Not that that ever stopped you from seeking Him out…

Spring finally comes and with it a blessed break. You and Ana take a full ten-dayto unwind, rentingrooms at The Elf Song, teasing the regulars and newcomers alike. Ana even takes a few back up to your room for a bit of extra fun. You knowshe misses the thrillof chasing rather than being chased, while you just pine for Him… Every time you think of him you feel your darkness tremble: an unending ache for him. You want him to fuck you, hurt you, dominate you, make you his and it’s driving you mad. You’ve never felt like this before, not for anyone, just for your harlequin.

Your little hiatuseventually comes to an end and upon your return there’s an invitation waiting for you both. Preparationsbegin immediately as you both work on the expected performance, new identical gowns to be ordered before your current ones show too much wear, etc., etc.…

The night comes, the carriage arrives, you and Delphi sit curled up together in one corner for the unexpectedly short ride. You’re shown to the ballroom where you fall into your routine: song, dance, disperse into the room to work. Tonight is oddly subdued, so you find yourself alone in a quiet corner looking out at the revelers taking their pleasures where they wish, your eyes scanning for Him...

“Here little puss, puss…” A breathy whisper stirs the hair dangling over your ear as coolfingers dance up the bare skin at the front of your gown, stopping at the bell at your throat, gently fiddling with it. You smile, waiting for him to continue, “You really should be careful with this tail of yours,” His other hand slides under your hair at your exposed lower back to grasp hold of your tail, tuggingyou closer, “Someone is liable to think it a convenient leash and drag you away with it.”

“And if that’s what I’m hoping for?” You turn your head ever so slightlyto look up at him, a soft pouting smirk on your lips as you let your body briefly lean against himbefore looking forward again, tilting your head away letting his hand at your throat open up to gently press on your pulse.You let the arm closest to him press against his chest, the back of your hand resting on his exposed skin, your fingers stretching up to lightly brush his jaw.

“Well then, maybe I should abscond with you…” His lips brush your neck, the barest hint of teeth on your skin, his thumb pressing down harder on your thrumming pulse, his other hand letting go of your tail to grip your hip, pulling you into him…

“ORIS!!…LYCORIS!!…” A far-off voice intrudes on this perfect moment.It takes a second for your eyes to focus on Delphi’s face, “Lycoris, you’ve been requested.” Shesmiles sternly at you, grabbing your handsand pulling you out of his grasp, “Time to get back to work.”

“Perhaps you’ll get your chance next time,” You smile over your shoulderat him and reluctantly walk away arm in arm with Delphi,“Did you really need to come get me right now?!” You hiss into her ear.

“Yes. I did. I was looking for you for a while, some large oaf has been pestering me about where ‘his’ kitty was. Something about being otherwise occupied when we performed so he missed his chance to grab you. Come take him away and fuck him into a silent stupor, because if I have to listen to him whining any longer, I’m going to end him!”

“Gods! Fine. But you owe me double now” You stick your tongue out at her.

“Well excuse me for taking you away just when things were getting good, but we’re working. You know that.”

“I know…” You pout and continue walking slowly, “Maybe his little friend will grab the harlequin again and the four of us can have a night of it at the very least.”

“Oh!” She shimmies her shoulders, “So you’rethat desperate for him?” You nod and give her a dejected look, “Oh…” She realizes just how bad you have it, “Is it…” She trails off, alluding to your darkness, the only one outside of the Truescar who knows about it.

“Maybe… At least I think so… Oh, I don’t know! But he really is the only one that’s ever made me feel so intensely drawn to them. Like a moth to a flame, I want him to be the end of me.” You lean your head onto her shoulder as you think of just how much you want him.

“Found you!” You’re yanked back by your tail by the large patron, “Thought I wasn’t going to find you. Even had to send the songbird after you.” He gestures at Delphi, who quickly smiles her goodbyes and rushes back to her adoring patrons. “Come on, you’re mine for tonight.”

You don’t even have time to respond before he throws you over his shoulder and carries you off to some private alcove and proceeds to roughly fuck you over and over. There’s no sign of his little friend with your harlequin…

6.

Several weeks pass and you decide to go shopping with Ana. You need a distraction, nothing so far has seemed to quiet your desire for Him, not even your daily prayers have brought you any peace, like the grace granted to you is somehow lessened recently... Gods! You haven’t even found out his name, real or professional.Nothing about him other than he drives you to the edge of madness. Anaonlyagrees to come so long as you go drinking afterwards. You acquiesce, maybe getting blackout drunk will help…

The streets are busy, filled with stalls of every sort. You wander aimlessly, not even sure what you’re looking for when you hear the sound of screams. You turn to see the sun blacked out by some enormous flyingthing… Wetand glistening, impossibly huge squid tentacles flailing around. You reach out for Ana, unable to form worlds, your fingertips brush her arm before you evaporate.

Chapter 3

Chapter Text

1.

You drift in darkness for who knows how long. You’re woken when a slight breeze stirs the loose hair around your face. Your eyes open but are unable to focus, everything is blurry… But there’s someone, or rather something, moving in front of you. You squeeze your eyes shut and open them again, trying to see clearly when you see it… A floating abomination, four great tentacles dangling from a sideways mouth filled with sharp teeth, purple glistening skin stretched taught over a protruding bony half formed skull, a veined pulsating brain covered in the same smooth skin. You try to recoil away from it only to find you cannot move. A clawed hand rises towards your face, a fat worm wriggling in between its fingers as it slowly closes in on your eye. You scream, but no sound leaves your mouth. Your body desperately tries to thrash, and struggle against this violation, but you’re immobilized. Then everything goes black. This is a nightmare… It must be.

You’re jolted back to consciousness, the distinct smell of burning flesh and something acrid invades your nostrils. Bleary eyed you look around trying to see where you are,or what’s happening. You’ve been thrown free of some sort of organicpod, similar things are lined up around yours, all in various states of destruction, it’s a wonder you’re alive. Your mind jumps to what you were doing only moments ago, shopping with Ana… Was it moments ago? It’s the last thing you remember before waking here on this oddly squishy floor in this alien looking place. Where’s Ana? Is she here with you? You frantically look in each of the pods around you, none look like her, but some of the bodies are so badly mangled you can’t even tell if they were Drow or not. You need to get out of here, you need to get back. But where do you go? You stumble through the grotesque room to what you can only assume to be a door.

The next room has no pods, but you hear a strange small voice calling to you, perhaps there’s another person here, another survivor. Although, it’s a strange sort of sound, like you can’t tell if you’re hearing it with your ears or inside your head, it’s gently invasive… You follow it up to a man slumped back in what you think is an examination chair, the top of his skull has been cleanly removed leaving his brain exposed and that’s when you realize it’s the brain that’s speaking to you, not the man, but his brain… It’s the strangest thing you’ve ever seen… Well, not discounting the rest of your surroundings… It begs you to help it, to free it from its prison of the not quite dead man’s skull... It’s not exactly the survivor you were hoping for, but it seems to want to help you: may as well see if freeing it will get you out of this whole mess.

You take a long look at the brain, you’re not unfamiliar with anatomy, having been present for dissections during your studies as a cleric, you can see why the brain creature is stuck. You gently slide your fingers along the inside of the skull, careful not to scratch the delicate tissue, gore posing no issue for you as you pull it free and let it jump free of your grasp. You watch in morbid curiosity as it wriggles and sprouts four little legs: it’s kind of creepy cute. It tells you to follow it to the helm. You’re not sure you want to know what’s there, but where else would you go? It’s better than staying where you are now, so you follow it.

You step out onto a walkway that has been ripped open, and look out onto an impossible scene… The hells: a burning, red, smoking, jagged wasteland stinking of brimstone with giant red dragons breathing fire down onto the ship you’re in as it hurdles through the air. The wind rips through the exposed corridor, a few tendrils of hair whipping around your face as you try not to look down, you’re just focusing on following the little brain on legs. You hear someone shouting as you reach the middle, looking up you see a strange green woman in gleaming silver armor on a ledge above you. The moment you look at her she leaps into the air, sailing over you, landing in front of you, shouting more as she points a sword at your neck. It’s hard to hear her but her tone and fury are easily discerned. You step back and raise your hands, you’re no fighter, you pose no threat to her. But before you can even speak there’s a searing pain inside your head as you suddenly see yourself through the stranger’s eyes and she sees herself through yours. You’re shaken by this intrusion, unable to understand what that just was, but this strange woman looks almost relieved.

“You are no thrall. Vlakkith blesses me this day.” The stranger stows her blade and looks at your silent frightened face, “But it appears we’re both infected. We must hurry to the helm and find my people to be cleansed.”

“Wait, what do you mean we’re infected?” Was that horrific dream of the tentacled monster real? Was that squirming thing really inside of your head now?

“We carry ghaik parasites!” You don’t know what that means and she grows angry at your ignorance, “Mind flayer parasites! We will become one if we do not find my people soon enough!”

“Shit…” Your mind races as the thought of that frightens you, panic starting to rise. You need to calm down. You bite down on the inside of your mouth, close your eyes and take a few deep breaths, letting the pain sooth you. You open your eyes and look at the little brain you’ve been following then look back at the stranger, “What about this thing? Will it attack us? It asked me for help, said it’s taking me to the helm. I didn’t know what else to do, so I followed it.”

“It will remain harmless so long as it thinks us thralls. We need to get to the helm so I can steer this ship. We will follow it. It may prove useful in combat,” She looks from it to you and glares disapprovingly at your short tunic dress, plain leather boots and lack of weapons, “Unlike you. You do not look like you’ll be of much use in anything.”

“I do know healing magic, if that’s of any help…” It’s true you’re no fighter, but that was never something you needed to worry about in your life. So why is she looking at you like she’s utterly disgusted by you?

“Not entirely useless, then.” She arches one eyebrow as she reassesses her estimation of you, “Come. We must hurry.” She turns and walks off at a brisk pace, almost having to jog to keep up with her and the brain creature.

Thankfully you only encounter a few small imps that she and the brain quickly dispatch. And since neither is harmed, you are left to do nothing but follow silently behind. Once you get back inside a less damaged area you look around as the other two bee line for another strange door. There’s another pod in this room with someone trapped inside. It’s a black-haired woman desperately bagging on the thing trying to break free. She sees you and screams frantically for your help,

“Please! Get me out of this thing!” She makes eye contact with you as you rush over to her.

“How?” You look at this strange contraption but don’t even know what you’re looking at or for, “How do I get you out of this thing?”

“I think you need something to put in there!” She points beside you to a console, “Try the other rooms. One of them was using it before. Please, hurry!”

You turn to rush into the next room when that strange green woman shouts at you,

“This ship is crashing! We do not have time to be wasting on her!”

“It’s another survivor! I’m not leaving her in there!” You glare back at her, “Besides, she’s wearing armor, maybe she’ll be of more use to you than me!” You throw her insult back as you walk away.

“Fine. But do be quick about it. For I will leave you both behind if I must.” The green woman threatens as she watches you go from this room to the next.

You frantically search the dead bodies in the next room and find something that looks like a small piece of this ship, hopefully it’s what goes to that console. You take it and run back, jam it into the slot and before you can touch anything else you feel an intense squirming inside your head that quickly fades to something more akin to a connection… Like how it felt to talk to the little brain, this machine is connected to your mind. You think of nothing other than wanting to open the pod and free the other survivor. The console hums, yields, opens, and the woman falls out.

“Thank you.” She kneels briefly before standing up and brushing herself off, “I thought that damned thing was going to be my coff- Ah!” She’s cut short, wincing as suddenly her mind and yours collide. You can feel her thoughts, and though she’s grateful to you she’s wary of the other survivor; the woman, a Gith, “You keep dangerous company.” Her eyes look passed you at the Gith with an icy glare.

“It kind of needs to be…” You gesture at your current surroundings, “I’m not exactly dressed for combat. If you haven’t noticed.” You give a tentative smirk and wave a hand over your clearly unprepared self.

“Hehe.” It’s a small giggle, “Fair point. Looks like you won’t be doing any of the fighting that may be coming up. Guess we should get going…” She trails off and looks around the floor then looks back inside the pod she fell from, reaches in and grabs some small thing that she shoves into her armor, “OK. Now I’m ready.”

“Enough of this chatter! We need to get to the helm, now!” The Gith woman strides off faster than ever, the little brain barely able to stay ahead of her.

“Guess we better hurry. She has no patience,” You huff and hurry to follow.

“So I can see. But she’s right to rush. We need to get off this thing as soon as possible.”

“Completely agree! This place is disgusting,” You scrunch up your nose, “I’m Talia, by the way.” You smile at her.

“Shadowheart.” She smiles back as you both rush to catch up to the others.

Your two companions make it very clear that neither trusts the other, nor even stand to be near each other. Why would these strangers be so hostile to one another? You’ve never even heard of the Gith before, let alone seen one. Sure, she’s a little odd looking to you, but why would Shadowheart immediately be distrustful? Or the Gith be the same about Shadowheart? It’s better to just not think about it too much right now. There’s way too much happening for that to be what takes up all your thoughts.

The next large area you get to has more of those imps, devils and one of those tentacled monsters, a mind flayer or whatever the Gith woman called it. The thing is struggling to fight off the imps, it calls out into your minds, commanding you to go to the helm, to the transponder, to use it, to escape. You hate the way it feels hearing it inside of your head. All three of you must have heard it because the Gith turns to you,

“Do it! We will deal with the ghaik and infernals while you get us out of here!” She draws her blade as Shadowheart brandishes a mace, moving to stand in front of you.

“If you say so,” You crouch, ready to sprint around the edge of the room to keep way from the fighting.

“Connect the nerves! We will connect them!” The little brain scurries ahead of you and begins to lead you towards the far side of the room.

You run as fast as you can on the slick squishy ground. The little brain attacking a wayward imp before it can dig its claws into you. You make it to the stairs, you hear the Gith cry out in pain from behind, you slow down and turn to look back, maybe you need to help her. But she only glares at you, screaming for you to keep going. You do, running up the stairs to the helm. It’s a mass of squirming tentacles, the little brain gently touches your mind, guiding your hands to which of these wriggling things you need to connect. You reach out and grasp two of the tentacles and bring them together, your mind focusing on going home, and then you look up.

A great red dragon appears, its claws griping the sinewy shreds of wall, its mouth opening up, blasting the helm with fire, knocking you back. The ship lurches, hurdling uncontrolled through the air, warping to different places, throwing you from one side to the other. You grasp desperately at anything, trying to stop yourself from being flung out of the careening ship. You lose track of the others; you can’t even hear them. You’re thrown to bit of wall next to a gaping hole, the wind howling in your ears as you look across at one of those damned monsters. Its eyes burn into yours as you’re smashed in the face, and everything goes black.

2.

The ground is soft and slick beneath you, there’s water gently lapping at your bruised cheek as you blink in the harsh sunlight. You push yourself up to kneel in the soft muck of a riverbank, looking around to see you’re surrounded by the burning ruin of the ship you were on. You sit still a moment to feel for any injuries, aside from a dull ache in your head you don’t feel anything more than light bumps and bruises. How is that possible? Surely you would have at least a broken bone or two? But no, there’s nothing else wrong with you. You stand, scrapping mud from your legs and dress in a futile attempt to clean yourself off before looking around. If you made it out unscathed, maybe there’s others? Maybe even the two you had met before?

You walk around the little patch of riverbank where you landed, but all you find is corpses and smoldering debris. It’s hopeless, no one survived this… You give up and decide to walk up the rocky embankment, maybe you’ll find a settlement, an out post, gods, even just a road to give you some bearing on where you are.

You get clear of some wreckage and see a figure further up the rocky path. You slowly continue to walk towards them, unsure if they’re a survivor like you… It’s a white-haired elf in fine clothes, he also appears to be uninjured… How? He calls out to you,

“Hurry! I’ve got one of those… brain things cornered!” He slightly turns to you, waving you over,pointing, “There in the grass. You can kill it can’t you?” He thenturns back towards the foliage.

You’re not sure what he’s going on about, asking your tiny, unarmed self to kill something. Was he with someone? You look around but see no signs of anyone else around or whatever it is he’s pointing to. Stepping a little closer, you continue to look, but still seeing nothing, you start to speak,

“I don’t see anythi-”

He moves lightning quick behind you, holding aknife atyour throat. There’s no time to react before he pulls you both to the ground, grasping you to his chest and wrapping a leg around you, pinning you against him.You struggle, your hands gripping his arm trying to pull but unable to. You whimper and lean your head back trying to get away from the blade.

“Shh. Not a sound. Not if you want to keep that darling neck of yours.” He grips you tighter and presses the blade into your skin, “Now, I saw you on the ship, didn’t I? Nod.”You nod.Panic turning to something else in his tight grip,“Splendid. And now you’re going to tell me exactly what you and those tentacled freaks did to me!”It’s a furious growl in your ear.

“I didn’t do anything to you!” You squirm briefly, still unable to get out of his grasp. You tremble now, pulling uselessly at his arm,adrenaline flooding your body as you feel the blade press further down, drawing blood.

“Don’t lie to me! -Agh!” He shouts and writhes as you feel his mind and yours collide. You're transported to dark familiar streets, a terrible hunger gripping you before you’re wrenched back into your own mind, “What was that? What’s going on?”

“I told you I don’t know!” You shout.Feelinghis grip falter slightlyyou twist your lower body as hard and fast as you can, freeing yourself and rolling away from him, the knife slicing deeper as you do.

Scrambling to your feet you both ready yourselves for whatever happens next. His eyes stare angrily at you before they drift down your neck, to the blood flowing down. You bring your fingers up to the cut, feeling the sting as you trace the line, a shiver going down your spine as the pain of it starts to bloom. But you can’t indulge in that now, you have to focus on this stranger and his apparent desire to kill you. Your magic gathers on your fingertips, light softly glowing as you close the gash. He watches as you use your sleeve to wipe away the blood then he speaks,

“I saw into your mind. They took you, just as they took me.” He straightens up,no longer looking ready to pounce,“And to think I was ready to decorate the ground with your innards. Apologies.” He accentuates his words with a flourish of the bloody blade, his eyes looking down at it then back up at you.

“Hah… Sure you would…” You mutter under your breath, the thought of him hurting you suddenly sounding so enticing.He’s still watchingyou, a strange smile spreading over his face. There’s atwinge pullingat you from your darkness. You ignore it, you havetopush all those thoughts down. You need toworry about finding a way home...

“I suppose an introduction is in order. My name’s Astarion. I was in Baldur’s Gate when those beasts snatched me.” He speaks eloquently while stowing the blade and straightening his clothes.

“I'm Talia.I'm also from Baldur's Gate,”You smile sweetly while tugging at your dress, pulling it back down. You’re hopelessly covered in dirt, your arms and legs covered in little scratches from rolling on the rocky ground, a far cry from your usual appearance.

“Is that so? Hmm, small world…” He moves his hands to his hipsand looks you up and down, “So, do you know anything about these worms?”

“Very little,” You think back to what the Gith woman said, “I think they’ll turn us into mind flayers.” You grimace and look down, not exactly what anyone would want to hear after surviving the crash.

“Turn us into - ha. Hahaha!” He laughs bitterly, “Of course it’ll turn me into a monster. What else did I expect?” He pauses for a moment lamenting your current predicament. But thenan idea brightens his face, “Although, it hasn’t happened yet. If we can find some expert - Someone that can control these things…There might still be time.”

“Maybe…” Did he just say control? Not get rid of?You want this thing gone and the only thing you know is what that woman said, “There was a Gith woman on the ship with me. She seemed to know of a way to be cured. Maybe we can find her?” It’s a vain hope, you know.You’re not sure how you even survived the crash, how could she? How did this guy for that matter?

“You know, I was ready to go this alone, but maybe working together isn’t such a bad idea.”

“That’s a relief. I was afraid you’d leave me to fend for myself.” Your fingers scrunch up the hem of your little dress as you look up at him through your lashes.

“Perish the thought,” The way he looks at you… it’s so familiar, “But where to start looking. I suppose we can look through the wreckage, perhaps we will find something useful down there.”

You follow him back down to a different part of the riverbank looking for anything that might point you in the Gith woman’s direction. You don’t find any clues, no other survivors, nothing really. As you look at a few armored corpses a thought occurs to you, maybe you should put on some sort of armor. You’ve seen some of those brain creatures, there very well could be more of the mind flayers lurking around, some chainmail might do you some good. You see some on one of the bodies and struggle to remove it while Astarion checks for weapons, picking up a few more daggers and a bow with a quiver. He hands you a mace and shield: they are rather heavy, you weren’t a martial cleric, but you don’t think it’ll be that hard to use them. The chainmail is too big and your light tunic dress wasn’t meant for protecting you from heavy metal. It chafes at your collar bone, the discomfort a comfort in and of itself.

You spend most of the daylight searching, watching him kill a few little brain creaturesand gathering a few supplies. Since neither of you finds anything that point you towards the Gith woman youcall itquitsfor the day.The sun is starting to go down and you don’t want to be wandering the wilderness when it gets dark and cold. It doesn’t take long to set up a small fireand lay outa fewblanketsyou found amongsome dead fishermen. You takeoff the chainmail, piling the shield and mace on top of it,and settlingby the fireto nibble some random bits of food you found among the dead. Astarion is already sitting and staring into nothingness.

“What are you brooding about over there?” You look over at his creased face.

“Hmm? Oh, just thinking about… Well, the possibility of sprouting tentacles… Can’t say I relish the idea and yet…” He trails off for a moment, staring into the fire then looking over at you, “It’s just that this all feels so new. Night usually means bustling streets, bursting taverns… lavish parties.” He smiles darkly and it reminds you of the masquerades, “And instead I’m going to be curling up in the dirt, it’s a little… um, novel.”

“Yeah, I know what you mean. My nights are usually spent…uuh, well…” You match his smile and allow yourself to briefly bring your harlequin to mind before pushing the thought away,“They’re usually spent out in the city. And I don’t usually sleep in the dirt either,” Yourlife as a Paramour isn’t exactly something you can bring up with this stranger,“But we should probably try to get some rest.”

“I’ll be up awhile yet. Today has been a lot. I need some time to think, to process this.” He waves a hand around his head then turns to you, “You rest. I’ll keep watch.”

“Really? You don’t mind?” He just smiles at you, “OK. Thanks. I’m really tired. I think I’ll restbetter knowing you’re up keeping us safe.” You genuinely smile with relief at him, it’s somehow comforting knowing he’ll be here.

“The pleasure is all mine. Sweet dreams.”

3.

The next day youwake to Astarion still sitting by the now cold fire, you’re surprised he didn’t ask you to switch so he could get some rest, but maybe he just wasn’t able to after everything that happened yesterday. You talk with him anddecide to leave the crash site behind and start searching further up the hillside. You put back on the chainmail over your filthy dress and scratch at your scalp, you hair still managing to be in your braided bun, it must be a matted rat’s nest by now, but you have no way of taking it down to brush it and put it back up. Maybe you’ll be able to clean up in the river tonight. You also don’t have much of anything to eat, you offer to share what little you do have with Astarion, but he declines, insisting you eat it before setting off.

After about an hour of walking in silence you hear voices from behind some rocks. Astarion puts his hand out behind him to stop you, he crouches down, motioning for you to copy him. You do, trying to keep your chainmail from making too much noise as you creep along in the shadows, your training in dance being helpful in holding your body still and moving fluidly while in an awkward stance. Astarion gets even closer while you try to peek around the rocks you’re hiding amongst. You can see her, the Gith, trapped inside a cage that’s suspended beneath a natural stone archway. She must see you, or sense you because your head throbs unexpectedly, and then she’s suddenly screaming at you inside of your head,

“Get me out of here, now!… Wait, is that one with you?”

“The white haired elf?”

“Who else would I be referring to? What’s he doing?”

“I don’t know. I can’t see him.”

“Useless… It looks as though he’s gotten the other two to leave. So get me down!”

“Is this the Gith you spoke of?” His voice being spoken aloud spooks you and your connection to her is broken.

“Yes. Yes, that’s her,” You sigh and glare at the ground as you walk around to speak with her.

“I do not like waiting!” Her impatience grates on you, “Get me down.”

“Only if you say please,” You give an insincere smile, your irritation rising, she was no better on the ship.

“Never,” Her lip curls into a sneer and she turns away from you.

“Ugh, fine. We’ll get you down. Hold on.” The temptation to leave her flits through your mind, but you still need her to help you get rid of the worm in your head.

You turn a pleading look on Astarion. He shoots outs the bottom of the cage while telling you of what the Tieflings had to say. There’s a druid grove not far with a healer there that may be of some use. The mention of a grove further irritates you, bothersome memories from your childhood threatening to resurface. The cage bottoms out and the Gith falls, landing on her feet and turning to look at the two of you,

“I see the parasite hasn’t scrambled all of your senses. Now, ignore whatever nonsense those two horned things were saying. My people are the only ones with a cure for our infection. We must find a creche. They mentioned more of my people having been spotted here, by some one named Zorru. Take me to him so I may question him. My kin will aid us.” She has a haughty stance and looks down her nose as she offers to help you.

“Alright,” Your ill temper fades a bit hearing that she’s willing to take you to her people to cure you. You’d do anything to be done with this and go home.

“And you may call me Lae’zel.” She adds offhandedly.

“Talia,” You look up at her briefly then look over at him.

“And I’m Astarion.” He smiles and dips his head ever so slightly, “Well, I guess that’s that then.” He looks at the two of you and turns, walking back up the hill, “Follow me. They told me where to go.”

You walk until the dry rocky ground starts to become greener, more verdant, the smell of forest starting to permeate the air. Though your grove was annoying to live in, the fresh green smell of trees and flowers was always lovely… The scent of lilies growing wild around your aunt’s hollow tree drift through your mind, but your little reverie is cut short by shouting heard up ahead. You follow Astarion’s lead in crouching down again while Lae’zel brazenly continues striding up the path. There’s people, adventurer looking types, yelling up at a cliff ledge partly covered in ivy, the top has more Tieflings shouting back down at them. You get closer, staying on the path Lae’zel walked up as Astarion quietly climbs the rocky mound next to you and that’s when you see the goblins.

Arrows fly towards the people and Tieflings, killing the one who started to raise the ivy covered gate. It slams back down as the adventurers turn to fight. Lae’zel charges in, her sword already drawn. You look up at Astarion who shrugs down at you and begins to fire arrows at the attacking goblins. You put up your shield, grip your mace and try to stay hidden in the shadow of Astarion’s perch, your magic ready to be called upon should anyone look like they need help.

Your eyes keep moving among the fighting bodies, there’s movement from the other side of the little battlefield. You squint to focus and see some new guy joining the fray, bounding down the cliff side near the Tieflings, spouting some heroic claptrap you’re sure you read in a fairy tale as a child. Honestly, it’s all too ridiculous. Do people actually speak like that? The past two days have been too much for you, where’s Ana when you need her? But you need to keep focused right now. You scan the fight; Lae’zel is laying waste to something that looks like an enormous mangy dog but seems otherwise unharmed, nothing has come close to Astarion up on the mound, but some of the strangers are bleeding so you heal them from where you’re hiding. Thankfully none of the goblins come for you, or if they did they’re killed before they get close enough for it to matter, you never even swing the mace gripped in your hands.

The goblins are felled, the gate is opened and everyone who survived is told to come inside quickly, lest more show up. You follow behind, the last one through before the gate is closed behind you. Lae’zel and Astarion wait for you to catch up as they approach the arguing adventurer and an old Tiefling. You stand there for a moment before growing impatient and continue on, hoping to find someone not embroiled in a heated argument: you need to find the healer and the Zorru guy. You’ve moved on when you hear some commotion behind you. You turn around to see the old man is laid out on the floor, the adventurer speeding passed you as Astarion lets out a bark of laughter. You can’t help smirking as you all walk away.

Further ahead on the path you see a familiar young woman with a long black braid, she’s dramatically waiving her arms at some scruffy looking man in robes. As you approach she spots you,

“It’s you! The one from the ship!” She exclaims and turns her back on her companion, “Talia!”

“You survived!” You continue to walk forward, her name eluding you as you approach.But then you see she bristles at the sight of Lae’zel.

“Oh, it’s you.” She sneers. “Where’d you find her? I’m pretty sure she was stuck in some cage when I saw her last.”

“Yeah, she was… Wait, how did-?” You start but are quickly interrupted.

“So,you knew I was there and yet you left me?” Lae’zel steps closer the other woman.

“My mistake.Maybe I should have sent an arrow through the bars to save me the trouble now.” Her voice rising as the man behind her begins to reach out to her.

“Now, now Miss Shadowheart, let’s not escalate this any further. Thingsare already quite tense here as theystand.” The scruffy man puts his hand on Shadowheart’s shoulder, and the look she turns on him elicits an immediate withdraw of said hand. “Excuse me. Sosorry!”

“Gods,” You mumble under your breath, “Look we got her out because she says she can get us fixed. Get rid of the worms in our heads.” What is it with these two? You know Lae’zel is difficult to get along with, you can barely stand her, but since the very moment these two saw each other on the ship they’ve gotten on as well as cats and dogs, “But she’s looking for more of her people. Someone here knows more but we need to find them. And I think there was something about a healer being here that might be able to help us? You know anything about either of those?” You give an imploring smile.

“I do…” She glares at Lae’zel again before continuing, “The healer that’s here is a no good. She’s not capable of handling the removal of the parasites. But she seems to think the arch-druid Halsin can help us. But he’s not here. He’s off in some ruins looking for something. Gale,” She waves her hand at the scruffy man, “and I were going to see if we can track him down. You’re welcome to join us,” She looks directly at you and Astarion, “Not you.” Her eyes turn to Lae’zel.

“Do whatever you wish. I’m going to find a creche and be cleansed. No backwoods druid can help you. Only my people can rid you of these parasites.”

“Or, maybe we can do both things? We’re a large enough group, right?” You propose what seems a reasonable compromise, you just want to find the fastest way of fixing this.

“That sounds like an excellent idea. How about we do some introductions and then settle on who we will be working with?” Gale smiles broadly and steps forward. “I’m Gale, obviously, from Waterdeep.”

“I’m Talia, nice to make your acquaintanceGale.” You smile at him before turningto Astarion, seeingif he will follow suit. This whole time he was simply standing back,enjoying watching Shadowheart and Lae’zel nearlycome to blows.

“And I’m Astarion.” Both of you look at Lae’zel then Shadowheart, neither moves to speak.

“Well, then shall I volunteer to venture forth with out new Gith companion while the rest of you go off to discover more about this missing Halsin?”’ Gale helpfully breaks the tension.

“Works for me.” Shadowheart says before turning around,making her way back up the path.

“Very well. Where should we reconvene and at what time?” Lae’zel asks you.

“Oh… um… I guess meet back here around dusk?” You shrug, wondering why you’re the one being asked that, she gives you a terse nod before walking away.

You and Astarion catch up to Shadowheart and make your way down the road towards the ruins. As you walk she tells you about the troubles inside the grove; the Tiefling refugees you saw crowding the place, the tension it’s causing because the arch-druid is missing and the woman who took charge is trying to seal the grove off and chase the refugees away; but there are unusually well organized goblins around that have already attacked the refugees before. The goblins must have a base set up somewhere, but she doesn’t know where, just that the grove is a hot mess right now. Though you find it strange that a grove would turn away people in need, you say nothing. Instead you tell her about what happened at the gate when you arrived, at that news she expresses the need to be very careful, it’s doubtful the three of you could handle a raiding party on your own. And that’s when she looks at what you’re wearing, laughing at your ill fitted chainmail, heavy mace and shield. But what can you say other than it’s all you could find, it’s not like there’s an armorer set up in the wilderness. She laughs with you, promising to help you not be totally useless in a fight. She’s also a cleric, but she has extensive training in fighting, so her help will be perfect. Astarion walks behind the both of you, contributing very little other than to complain about the amount of walking that’s been happening in his life these past two days. You agree, but it’s not like you have much choice.

4.

You find a bridge strewn with broken carts, scattered goods and the bodies of refugees and goblins.The adventurers from the grove are here looking over some of the dead, their friends among them. One of the men, the one that knocked out the Tiefling,tells the three of youall about what happened to the arch-druid. As he drones on your mind starts to wander, you don’t really care to listen so you poke around the bridge while Shadowheart and Astarion talk with him. His friends eye you suspiciously when you get too close to the bodies of the ones they knew so you just lean over the wall of the bridge and look out at the forest, enjoying the sunshine on your face.

Your companions walk back over to you as the adventurersset off. Shadowheart quickly summarizes what they found out; the goblin camp is at the ruins and that’s where the adventurers lost the arch-druid. She wants to continue, do reconnaissance on as much of the area as you can for the day. Astarion seems to agree with her so the three of you headover the bridge towards a burnt out villageon the edge of the forest.Before you reach the entrance Astarion stops you and Shadowheart, something feels off to him... There’s an ambush. He and Shadowhearttell you to keep back as they walk in.

“Git over there. Surround ‘em like!” It’s a nasally voice coming from the right of the archway, you can’t see them from where you stand.

“I know you’re there.” Astarion calls out to the voice.

“You spotted us. Good. ‘S like they say… No fun skewerin’ a pig what doesn’t know he’s cooked.”

“Look, we don’t want any trouble.” He keeps his voice steady as he looks up at the voice, Shadowheart shifts her weight beside him.

“An’ I didn’t want to be stuck moppin’ up nosy trespassers like you. Ain’t nobody gettin’ their way today.”

You tiptoe closer, keeping out of sight as you feel that thing inside your head wriggle. The pain it causes you feels like a violation, an anathema to your Maiden’s desires and you grimace at it. Shadowheart and Astarion must have felt it too because the strangest thing happens…

“I said, stand down. Now.” His words are a command that you can feel and the voice inside the village must have felt it too.

“Ah! Beggin’ your pardon True Soul! You’ll get no more trouble from us, sir.”

The voice trembles as you watch him smile viciously. His eyes drift over to where you moved,

“Come on. We can go in now.”

“What was that just now?” You look at Astarion as you walk over to them.

“I honestly have no idea. But it felt delicious.” That smile is still spread across his lips as he looks around the ruined village.

Shadowheart narrows her eyes at him before simply suggesting you move on with gathering more information. She’s curious to learn about whatever a ‘True Soul’ is. They go on to speak with the other goblins milling about as you look around, feeling a little more secure with walking away from them. You hear several deep voices, nothing like those of the goblins. You follow the sound until you see a group of ogres, or at least that’s what you assume them to be. They’re arguing over how the mangled body of a Tiefling tastes. You must have made some noise or otherwise been spotted by them because the biggest one in the middle looks directly at you and speaks,

“And what surprise is this?” He looks to his fellow ogres, “Brothers, look here. I have eyed yet another prize. Fortune favors our bellies. Little girl: be you friend or food? The mark is her measure: show us the brand of the Absolute.”

He looks at you hungrily, a look you know all too well from your work at The Chateau. You smile demurely at him, daintily sauntering over: you know how to work someone like this,

“What wonderful eloquence from such an unexpected place.” You let your hand rest gently at your collar bone, your chainmail making it difficult to look too vulnerable, but a well pouted mouth and doe eyes should do just as well for now, “I think I would make for a terrible meal. I am but a tiny thing, no better than a tooth pick for ones such as yourselves.” You look up through your lashes to see that the big one’s eyes still watch you intently, “As for a brand, I bear no such marking upon my unmarred flesh. I am to be kept pristine, for I am one of the Absolute’s chosen.” You slip your chainmail up your arms and lift it almost all the way to show your legs letting them marvel at what they wish to taste.

“Ahhh…” A pained groan escapes the big one’s lips, you’ve got him, “Indeed? How regrettable, that your meat must go unsavoured.” He watches with an anguished expression as you lower your chainmail back to where it hangs around your knees.

“Food?” The other two ogres ask with salivating mouths.

“Not food. Friend…”

“Yes… Friend,” You almost whisper the words as you clasp your hands behind your back, letting your chest stick up and out. A completely indefensible stance to be sure, you’d be so easy for him to simply snatch up and you both know it, “I’ve seen few ogres around here. What are you doing in such a place, working for my god?” It rankles you to say it, but this charade must be kept up.

“We follow the scents of blood and gold to all lands fertile,” He straightens up as he speaks proudly, “And this land proves particularly… fruitful.” He looks down and to the side as Shadowheart and Astarion walk over to stand beside you, “But I have no use for your Absolute, or any god. I follow two masters only: gluttony and greed. These goblins understand my appetites and sate my hunger for gold. And the rest sate my hunger for meat.”

“So I see…” You look over to your newly arrived companions, seeing if they wish to speak with the ogres, now that they believe you to be allies.

“I say you should forget the goblins. We would make much better patrons to serve than them.” Astarion stands confidently beside you as he speaks to the ogres. You wonder why he would want them working for you all.

“I am by all accounts a student of higher commerce and extortion. Make me an offer,” The ogre’s eyes slide from Astarion back to you, “Tempt me.”

“I’ll pay you in the flesh of my fallen foes… You will have your fill.” You bite your lip and give him your own little hungry stare.

“A brilliant notion, and a boon to my aching belly. We have a deal, my delectable little lady.” He reaches behind him to present you with a large horn, “Take my bonehorn. One blow, and the ground will quake with my family name.” You take it from his hands and hold it to your chest, caressing it with your finger tips, “Blow it when you have need of me.” His eyes focus on his horn in your dainty hands.

“I will,” You dip your head and watch them leave the village.

“What was THAT?” Shadowheart looks over at you absolutely flabbergasted. You may have no use in battle but you know desire and how to use it.

“What? He was hungry…” You smile at her as you feel Astarion’s stare, you turn to look at him, “So I teased him.”

You tuck the horn into your belt, deciding to keep close to the other two for the rest of their time spent here: maybe wandering off wasn’t the best idea. You just got lucky it didn’t end badly for you, unlike the Tiefling they had been munching on. The late afternoon sun signals that maybe it’s time to head back.

Your small group arrives back in the grove to see Gale and Lae’zel have a third in tow;the brash man from the goblin fight at the gate. He’s animatedly talking to Gale while Lae’zel glowers at them both before she notices you walking up. Lae’zel explains to you, specifically ignoring Shadowheart right next to you, that this new man is Wyll, he is also infected and he’s tracking some devil who seems to be in the same direction as the other Gith. Lae’zel invited him to go with her and Galetomorrow in search of both of their objectives. Fantastic.Shadowheart is pleased that it leaves you and Astarionfree to continue your own work gathering information on the goblin camp.She’s anxious to find the missing druid, she doesn’t trust Lae’zel or her people’s ability to cure you of the parasites. You honestly don’t care either way, so long as someone can get it out of your head.

After such a long day hunger and exhaustion begin to creep up on you. You let everyone know you’re going on to find something to eat and maybe ask about a place you can sleep for the night. You don’t want to have to sleep on a scratchy blanket in the dirt again, you also really want a bath… And maybe a chance to do your prayers, it wasn’t exactly a priority yesterday. Your mind wanders as you walk alone down into the grove towards the sounds of the refugees when you hear someone else’s feet scrapping along the gravely path. You turn to see Astarion coming, so you slow down to wait for him,

“Come to help me?” You tilt your head to the side, feigning delicate weakness.

“As a matter fact, I amhere to help you, my dear.”It’s an easy grinas he walksnext to you.

“Are you sure it’s wise to leave Shadowheart and Lae’zel together?”You arch a brow at him, thinking back to how easily the two of them jump at each others’ throat.

“I’m sure it’ll be fine. Wyll has Lae’zel well in hand, lecturing her about how to politely get information from people.” He scoffs lightly, “And if not, perhaps we will return to a bloody mess?”

“Aww… But then we’d have missedall the fun.” You smirkup at him, enjoying his darkhumor.

Your little excursion has youfind a blacksmith; a Tiefling refugee with a sad fire as a forge, butheassures you hecan adjust your chainmail,haveit fit you properly and provideapadded tunicto wear underneath. You’ve easily enough born the pain of it chaffing at your exposed skin,healed the bruisesand broken skin.Butyou expect you’ll have to actually fight while wearing it at some point, and proper padding would help it to not be an extra injury that will need healing later; you really do need to keep your body looking pristine for when you get back home. You pull off the chainmail and leave it in the blacksmith’s care. Tugging your dress back down as you continue your errands.

Another Tiefling,across from the blacksmith, has a pot of… something edible… At least you think it is, she’s happy to share with youand yourgroup, you’ll have to return with everyone later to eat. And then there’s Auntie Ethel, an unexpected delight in this stuffy place. Something about her makes you feel like you could tell her anything and she wouldn’t be the least bit surprised. She’s also darkly amusing, making you laugh with tales of sorry cheating husbands and their scorned wives. There’s an almostinstant clickbetween her, you and Astarion. Sheinvitesyoutwoback to her home for tea,She knows there’s something going on with you, but understands that you don’t want to get into it here, so you tell her tea would be lovely and Astarion cannot wait.

You ask one of the other random Tieflings if there’s somewhere you can sleep and please, a place to bathe. Theyshowyouto a storehouse that youallcan sleep in for the night and you are told of a small, secluded part of the riverdeeperinside the grove that you can use for bathing.Astarion offers to get everyone settled while you and Shadowheart head down to the river to clean up, Lae’zel had no interest is joining you.Oh well, her loss. She can stay smelling of tarnished metal and squid ship.

On your walk down you’re thankfully able to avoid speaking to any of the druids: you haven’t been to a grove since you left yours. You had always felt so uncomfortable there, not once did you ever think to return. You force those thoughts out of your mind as you reach the little spot. You and Shadowheart set down the linens, soap and sponges on some rocks in order tohelp each other peel off your dirt and sweat soaked clothes and undo impossibly tangled hair. You’ve had your hair tied up in a braided bunfor who knows how long;you’re convinced it’s not even possible to tell its redanymore, and the weight of it coming down tingles your scalp. The water around you and Shadowheart immediately turns brownas you submerge yourselves:it's disgusting and such a relief. You scrub your tunic dress while she scrubs her padding,under shirt, and pants. You don’t say much to each other, but it’s oddly comforting having her there with you. She reminds you of Ana, just a little bit.

Her laundry takes a long time so you let yourself float in the cold water, looking up at the night sky, hoping to see some familiar stars. Your mind finds itself going back home, to your life as it should be, to the people you should be with, to the one that you dream of… Shadowheart taps you letting you know she’s done.You help each other wring out all the clothes, wrap yourselves in the borrowed linens, andwalk back to the storehouse.

Youchat for little while with Shadowheart, eating the sad bowl of slop together beforeexcusingyourself to walk aroundfor a bit; you’rehoping to find somewhere to pray. There’s a rocky path behind the storehouse that leads to a craggy ledge:it’s perfect. You sit down and let the sheet slip down your back as you pull a small knife out from the folds. Your optionsfor devotions are rather limited;nothing can make too much noise, lest you draw attention to yourself. So, you settleon a knife to your upper leg;even if you’re careless in cleaning up, no one would question blood on a woman’s inner thigh.

You open your legs and press the blade to your flesh,slidingit up, feeling your skin separate in a searing line, blood flowing down and dripping onto the rocks. The pain fillsyou with holy pleasure,stiflinga moan youwhisper the words of your prayer. As your words fadeyou feel theMaiden of Pain’s blessing wash over you,and you are contented. You stay sitting in the darkness for a long while, basking in the sweet ache, your hair starting to dry as it hangs down behind you. You tip your head back to gently sway, lettingyour hairtickle your back a little before deciding it's time to return to the others. You close up the wound and use some moss to wipe the blood away.

Everyone has settled themselves down into bed rolls for the night. It’s quiet as you walk over to where you’d hung your dress and check on it; it’s going to need until morningto dry, soyou wrap the sheet around you tighter. Shadowheart has been starting at you since you passed by, you look over at her,raising your eyebrows in a silent question. Her eyes dart down your sheet, you follow and see you did get blood on it, you shrug at her, and she nods her head before settling back down. Your bedroll is close to Lae’zel and Astarion: Lae’zel seems to already be asleep while Astarion is still sitting up, watching you, an intense look in his eyes as you walk over. You smile and whisper goodnight before crawling into the bedroll, wondering if he also saw the blood onyoursheet.

You close your eyes tryingto rest, but rest eludes you. You layquietly,eyesstillclosed,listening to the others’breathing. But…there’s another sound…An almost imperceptible rustling fabric andsomething else…creaking floorboards. Trying not to move too much, you open your eyes and see Astarion quietly moving away from the sprawled-out sleepers. You watch him make his way to the back of the storeroom, to where you had slipped away to earlier. Once he disappears you sit up and strain your ears, listening to his footsteps quietly fadingand wondering where he’s sneaking off to.

Chapter 4

Chapter Text

1.

You wake to the bustling sounds of the refugees echoing in the cavernous grove. You squeeze your eyes and roll face down into the bedroll. The others in your little group are waking or are already up and ready in the case of Lae’zel and Wyll. Gale and Astarion are the next ones out of their bedrolls while you and Shadowheart linger. You can hear the four of them talking about how the day will go as you shuffle over to your dress to see if it’s suitably dry; it is. You struggle to try and slip it on while staying hidden under your rumpled sheet. Honestly, you should just stand there naked to get dressed! Shadowheart giggles at you and holds it up as a partition while you finish changing. You then trade places with her so that she can change. She groans at her padding still being mildly damp as she shrugs into it, leaving her armor for later.

Astarion comes over to the two of you informing you of the day’s plan of action. The three of you will continue to scout the area, find the goblin camp at the ruins and see if you can get any reconnaissance done there as well. The others will be hunting down the devil and searching for the Gith. With that all settled you insist on getting food before seeing if your chainmail is ready.

You go back to the Tiefling with the giant caldron to see what she’s cooked up this time. It looks even worse than last night… Instead you ask if she has bread, cheese and fruit. She happily gives you some apples along with some decent bread and hard cheese. You share with Shadowheart, offering some to Astarion, who declines again, saying he’s already eaten. You stuff your face and walk over to the blacksmith. He presents you with your newly refitted chainmail, a padded tunic to wear underneath it and pants. You put it all on and wait for his and Shadowheart’s approval, they both nod. Shadowheart then grabs a short sword and hands it to you, insisting you’ll fare better with that than the mace. Shrugging you take it and its scabbard and fix it to the big belt you now have for your chainmail.

The three of you head back to the storehouse so Shadowheart can put on her armor, but you’re stopped just before going inside. There’s an angry rust-redheaded druid woman determinedly striding towards you,

“You there, stop.” Your companions do as she says and turn to her as she continues, “You’re adventurers, are you not?” She looks at each of you, her eyes lingering on you, narrowing in on your face as you begin to step behind Astarion.

“Not exactly,” Shadowheart shakes her head, “What do you want Khaga? Going to threaten more children?”

“She was a thief.” Her words carry such vitriol as she stares at Shadowheart, “But that’s besides the point. I want your little group to get these… refugees out of my grove. They need to be gone before we can finish The Right of Thorns.”

You’ve heard about that before; dark druid magic that has never ended well for the groves that performed it… Her glare turns back on you, her eyes boring into yours, the same look you used to get back then… You hate her. You hate it here. You want to go home, back to the people who understand you, back to your harlequin. You reach out and grip the back of Astarion’s shirt, chewing anxiously on the inside of your mouth.

“That sounds very much like a problem you need to deal with. We have our own problems.” Shadowheart turns away from Khaga and storms into the storehouse.

Astarion is quick to follow Shadowheart, your grip on him pulling you along; you hadn’t realized you were holding on to him. Why are you?

The others are still inside, having only just finished eating, and overheard the commotion. Wyll and Gale want to help the Tieflings, the rest of you decidedly don’t want to get involved. You’re not here to solve the problems of others, just your own shared problem. Lae’zel is quick to stress how your transformation could happen at anytime, in fact it should have already started. Gale agrees with her on that point, but he’s happy to assume something is different about your group and that none of you will change. You would prefer to just not think about it. Whatever is going on, the most important thing now is looking for Lae’zel’s people and the missing druid in the hopes that one of them will be able to cure you. And maybe camp outside of this Maiden forsaken place…

Everyone agrees that staying in the grove is no longer ideal; so, everyone helps gather the necessities for making a base camp. Wyll leads the way, taking you all to a clearing by the river that should work well enough for now. Everyone picks a place to pitch their tent; you set up between Shadowheart and Astarion, Lae’zel is on the other side of Astarion followed by Wyll and then Gale. It’s almost funny how your little camp it split up into your respective groups.

You, Shadowheart and Astarion head towards the ruined village to start your scouting. Shadowheart and Astarion want to check out the area surrounding the village, they assume it’s close to the ruins so there must be easy access there and back. You start by walking around outside the village wall, going down to the right from the bridge approach. The two of them talk about heading back up, this area just seems to be river and muck; you wander away from them having spotted some wild berries you want to pick for later. As you go about picking and eating your eye is caught by something… A dark opening in the rock face; it’s a cave. You walk closer to it as Shadowheart calls out to you,

“We’re going to head back up- What did you find there?”

“A cave!” You want to go inside, “Maybe it’s a whole network that gets closer to the ruins. Wanna check it out?”

“It’s worth a look. Come on,” She calls to Astarion then trudges through the mud and joins you at the mouth of the cave.

“Ugh. Must we?” He grumbles but follows, “This had better be worth it.”

You quietly walk in and look round, the place smells of stagnant water and rot. You see a little pathway off to the left and head over to it, it’s a rocky ledge you can climb down pretty easily and at the bottom you see a Selune statue overlooking a spot littered with offerings and a fancy chest. Astarion spots the treasure and heads straight for it while you and Shadowheart look up at the statue and sneer at the serene face. You’re unimpressed by this simpering, virtuous goddess; your Maiden is not a friend of Selune. As you turn away you hear Shadowheart muttering irritably under her breath and you have a thought,

“I know right?Why is she down here, ruining a perfectly nice cave?” You give her a wicked smirk.

Shadowheart stays quiet giving you a questioning look before you both look over and see Astarion poking around behind the statue.What is he up to over there?

“You’re… you’re not a Selune sympathizer?” She seems almost incredulous.

“Pfft!! Gods, no! That whole ‘holier than thou’ shit her worshipers are always peddling around town is so annoying. But I don’t know who’s worse, the Selunites or followers of Ilmater.” Your smile turns mischievous, “Wanna ask if Astarion needs to take a piss?” Her smile matches yours as your gazesdrift towards him.

“I can hear you; you know!” He shouts from behind the statue, “And no! I do not need to take a piss, before you actually ask me.”

”Aww, you’re no fun.” You pout as he jumps back over.

He shakes his head whilefussingat the chest, successfully getting it open and rummaging through it. Shadowheart and you glower back up at the statue as Astarion rises,and strutsgleefully over to the two of you. He stops in front of you,bowsdowndramaticallyandpresentsyou both with a small statueof Selune,

“For mytwolovely, vulgarladies, a token of my affection.” He lifts it up and drops it unceremoniously into your hands.

“Wow, an ugly paperweight! Just what every lady wants.” Shadowheart looks down her nose at the thing in your hands before she picks it up and tosses it over the ledge, “Oops!”

“Oo!” You clasp your hands together, “You found the perfect place for her;the bottom of some god's forsaken hole!Nicely done.” You smile and nod at each other approvingly.

“Now shall we continue on?” She gives a little self satisfied head shake before leading the way deeper into the cave.

With just a little more exploration you see why the stench was so bad inside the cave: it’s an owlbear den, with a cub… You really don’t want to find out if it’s mother is around, so all three of you decide it would be prudent to simply slip back out the way you came.

As exhilarating as that little excursion was, Shadowheart and Astarion would prefer to look for over land routes to the ruins. So you go back up through the village to look at the roads that lead directly there and then head into the forest to look for a hidden vantage point. Astarion finds a good one and has you all sit there to watch for a while. You can see there’s a lot of guards posted everywhere, no spot looks like you’d be able to sneak in. Astarion wonders if maybe that mind control thing he used at the village would work here. Shadowheart isn’t interested in testing it out with no back up, and you agree. You’re scared to think about having to fight that many goblins. You haven’t even swung the sword you’re carrying. And it’s a fair point, Shadowheart says to go back and talk to the rest of the group. Maybe plan on trying to get in using Astarion’s trick while the others wait at this look out point as reinforcements; should anything go wrong. With that tentative plan floating around your minds you head back to camp.

2.

The walk back is quiet as you follow behind Shadowheart and Astarion. You can hear them discussing approaching the ruins from another area and your mind immediately wanders away; you have nothing to contribute to their conversation, so you look around the forest as you walk.You spot a dead boar, nothing odd about carrion in a forest, but it is odd that it hasn’t been picked at by scavengers yet. You get closer, wanting to know why…

“Must you stop and gawk at everything you find out here?” His voice startles you.

“No,” You don’t stop at everything... “It’s just that nothing has come along to eat it. That’s strange.”

“Is it?”

“Yeah,”

“Look it’s dead. What difference does it make if something comes along to make a meal of it or not?” He turns back around, “Just leave it.” And he walks away.

Whatever. It’s getting late. You hurry to catch up to them and return to camp.

Upon arrival you smell something being cooked; Gale and Wyll are by the fire making dinner while Lae’zel sits off to one side organizing weapons. Shadowheart suggests showing you how to hold your shield and use a sword before settling down for the night. You go with her to practice until dinner is ready. When it’s time to eat you are thoroughly sore, tired and starving; but you want to change out of your gear. You go to your tent and change into the long shirt you bought to wear under your padding next time; your poor dress will be shredded to rags in no time if you kept wearing it under the chainmail. You feel so much better after changing.

Your meal is simple fire roasted meat and charred potatoes; it’s not the worst thing you’ve ever had… It’s certainly better than what that Tiefling was serving back in the grove. Everyone eats sitting around the fire while sharing the day’s events. Shadowheart and Astarion bring up needing a plan for getting into the goblin camp to look for the druid. Lae’zel and Wyll insist they need to continue doing what they’re doing, there’s been progress in his search for the devil he’s hunting. So they will continue that tomorrow while your little group continues to scout around the ruins. With that settled everyone disperses.

You get up and grab a couple bottles of wine and head over to where Shadowheart is sitting by the fire.

“Come to get drunk and further bemoan the moon bitch?” She swipes abottle from your outstretched hand and smiles before takinga swig.

“Hehe, you caught me,” You sit down next to her and take a long sip from your bottle, “But not just that…I wanted to ask who do you serve?As a cleric?I’ve been thinking about it, and there’s really not that many like us, so I have an idea as to who…”

“I suppose you canask,” She takes a small sip, “I serve the Lady of Loss, Shar.”

“That’s what I thought,” You take a sip, “That’s kind of funny.”

“And why would it be funny?” She drinks more,side-eyeing you.

“Because of whom I serve,” You grin at her, and she raises her eyebrows expectantly, “Hmmm, … what if I told you that the whole reason I’m trained as a cleric is to better hide evidence of my daily prayers?” You raise your bottle to your lips and take several large gulps.

She narrows her eyes, scrutinizing you as recognition flashesin them,

“Really?! The Maiden of Pain?” You smirk and shrug, “Huh… That actually makes a lot of sense now... Can I ask you why Loviatar?” Shadowheart follows your lead and gulps down about half her bottle.

“I guess I can share that with you.” Another sip, your head starting to feel delightfully fuzzy, “I’m not originally from Baldur’s Gate. I grew up in a forest grove, like the one here, raised by my aunt. And for some reason, the whole of my life, I’ve been drawn to pain. My earliest memory is of me holding my hand to a fire,my aunt screaming at me while the other children looked on in horror… I… I unsettled the people of my childhood home. My aunt tried the shield me from that, but I knew. I didn’t belong there, and everyone knew it. Thenone day my aunttold me to go to Baldur’s Gate. She handed me a sealed letter, told me under no circumstances was I to open it and once I was in Baldur’s gate, to seek out The Chateau de la Douleur. When I got there it felt like home… It was the first time I had ever felt like I belonged…And that’s where I’ve beeneversince.”

You stare at the fire, not sure what her reaction will be: you’ve never told anyone about your past except Ana,and she was already at the temple when you got there, so she knows everything after that.Shadowheart stays quiet for a long moment,

“I… Ihave no memoriesfrom before I was rescued by the Mother Superior.” She gives you melancholy look, “I don’t know why I was in the forest, at night, alone, as a child, but I was… And I was attacked by a wolf. But then suddenly she was there… She saved my life that night, took me in, brought me to her temple and gave me a life in Shar’s embrace. I have been devoted to My Lady since then,” She smiles, drinks then speaks again, “So, we both worship a goddess that others would scorn us for…” You nod, recognizing how alike you two are, “I suppose we’ll just have to keep each others’secret for now. Not too sure what the others will think if they find out.” Shadowheart gives you a genuinely warm smile, her eyes glossy and cheeks flushed from drink.

“Agreed.” Relief floods your increasingly drunken mind, “So, you’ll help cover for me if I ever have unexplained blood on me or get caught during my prayers?” You drink more, almost draining the bottle.

“That devout, are we?” She asks in mock surprise before draining her bottle.

“Well, I willtry to keep quietand clean myself up when I’m done…” You give a cheeky smile.

Shadowheart giggles softly before deciding she’s had enough for the night and retires while you stay for a little longer, willing your head to swim a little less. You look up at the stars for a while, enjoying the cool night air. Eventually you start to feel stable enough to walk, but before you stand you give the bottle a little shake, there's a tiny bit left. You put the bottle to your lips and tip your head back, draining the last of it, some of it spilling down your lips and chin. You get up and head off to your tent when Astarion appears out of his,

“Oh! Well, hello!” He sounds as surprised as you feel, “What are you doing up so late?” He walks over to where you’re standing.

“Oh, you know… Just a little girl talk.” You pointyour hand towards Shadowheart’s tent, forgetting about the empty bottle you’re holding.You notice just how close he is, and your heart starts to race.

He moves even closer, his hand reaching up to take hold of your chin. His thumb slowly slides across your lower lip, you can feel a little wetness smear as he does,

“You’re a messy drinker,” He keeps hold of your face looking down to your lips, past them down your neck and then back up to your eyes, a smile gracing his face.

“Only when I’m having fun.” Your own eyes wanderdown to his lips, willing yourself to keep your breathing steadyas you wonder how they would feel pressed to yours. Why does he make you feel like this? Like only He could…

“And what ‘fun’ were you ladies indulging in, other than idle chatter, of course?” His grin grows wolfish.

“A lady never tells.” You return the hungry smile while tapping the empty wine bottle on his chest, forcing yourself to turn andwalk away.

Only then does he release his hold on your chin. You feel his eyes watchingyou as you walk to your tent, swaying your hips just a little more than usual.

You let the tent flap flutter closed behind youand undo your hair, letting it fall messily down your back. You lay down and try to rest, but you can’t stop thinking about what just happened with Astarion. The way he makes your heart race, your body to flush, your breathing go all ragged… And the more you think about it the more you can’t stop thinking about it. It plays over and over again. Eventually your thoughts snap into focus,and you zero in on something odd…Why was he leaving his tent when everyone elseis already asleep? You poke your headoutside, give a quick look around,and then as quietly as you can, creep over to his tent and listen… You can’t hear anything;no rustling sheets, no snores, nor breathing, just silence… Your hand reaches out forthe tent flap, you grasp it and start to push it aside…

“You know, curiosity killed the cat.” His voice startles you, shattering the quiet of the night.

You drop the flap and turn on your heel, your hands grasping the tent closed behind your back. You watch him slowly stalk through the darkness towards you, a devilish grin on his perfect lips. Your body flushes, a shiverrushing down your spinemaking you tremble slightly.This is the second time he’s snuck up on you tonight. You attempt to calm yourself and respond,

“And satisfaction brought it back,” As the words leave your mouth this moment blurs into a moment from your past… You don’t know if it’s your drink addled mind or what, but you’re overcome an intense sense of Deja vu.

“Hmm… Is that so…” He stops close enough for you tofeel his breath stirring your loose hair.Hishand reachesout to lift a lock of it up, moonlight softly illuminating it, before he letsit slip through his fingers, his eyes staring into yours.

You can’t look away,you feel yourself being pulled towards him, wanting to lean into him, to feel his body pressed against yours… You stop yourself, your mindbringingup the image ofyour harlequin, comparing him to Astarion… It's ridiculous, impossible even, this isn’t Him. It couldn’t be… You have to get away, you mumble an apology before stepping to the side and rushing back to your tent.

3.

You wake the next morning groggy and dry mouthed having drunk way too much, thinking dirty things and gotten hardly any rest. Shadowheart doesn’t look like she’s faring much better than you. She suggests your little trio goes to the grove for a resupply trip, she doesn’t think the two of you will be of much use doing anything else; Astarion laughingly agrees.

The other group goes on to continue hunting Wyll’s devil as you three slowly make your way to the grove to shop. The place is still uncomfortable to be in; everyone asking for your rag tag group to solve their problems, and you could not care less about these strangers or their problems. You finish shopping as quickly as possible and go back to camp. Hopefully you can train a little with Shadowheart, pray and then clean up in the river.

You lay out on the rocky outcrop by Astarion’s tent, enjoying the late afternoon sun, talking with Shadowheart when she suddenly sits up and looks over to see the others returning. You look over as well to see it’s not just Lae’zel, Wyll and Gale… There’s a tall, one horned, devil woman and a white dog with them… You both look at each other confused as Astarion goes to meet them at the fire pit. You climb down to meet the new comers. Lae’zel and Gale begin to tell you all what happened as Wyll storms off.

The devil is in fact a Tiefling named Karlach. She’s only alive because Lae’zel and Gale weren’t blind to the obvious and got Wyll to back the fuck off. So that’s why he’s off having a pout. Karlach then introduces her furry friend; Scratch, an amazing little ball of white fluff who gets all the pets from everyone. She found him while she was on the run from some other pursuers; pursuers who are now dead and no longer a problem. How did Wyll ever think this giant sweetie was a bloodthirsty murderer? She’s delightful.

With quick introductions out of the way Shadowheart immediately goes into the need to rescue the arch-druid to help with the parasite problem you all share. Lae’zel has put aside her search for her people, the trail having gone cold, but she is insistent that combat must be practiced with everyone if there’s any hope of infiltrating the goblin camp. The talk now leaning heavily into team dynamics, strategies and battle plans you decide to walk away and play with the dog. You’ll do whatever they decide on; you’ve no idea how to plan fights, you’re only useful as a healer. You sit on the floor with Scratch and pat him for a while when Wyll returns, spouting something about there being consequences for not killing Karlach. You roll your eyes, what is this mopey goody-goody on about?

Dinner is cleared away by you and Shadowheart; you go down to the river to clean everything while the rest stay up by the fire. You hum mindlessly as you clean when you hear the dog barking. You look over to see Wyll and someone new talking by the fire. Whoever she is, she’s beautiful, and very clearly a devil; crowned by four horns and large bat like wings. You stay crouched down where you are and watch Karlach go over to talk with them, everyone else seeming to keep their distance as well. Then the devil does something and Wyll is engulfed in infernal magic, changing him… When the magic fades he now has horns like a Tiefling and then the devil woman vanishes.

Everyone crowds around Wyll and Karlach asking about what just happened. He’s been punished for breaking his contract, or some such drivel. You think his new look suits him, but he’s miserable. He storms off again followed closely by Karlach and Lae’zel of all people. Gale suggests drinks for the rest of you, a night cap if you would. Shadowheart, Astarion and you are all happy to join in that. Today has been a lot. A drink and bed sounds wonderfully relaxing; if only you didn’t constantly feel Astarion’s eyes on you…

The next day Lae’zel insists on first tackling teamwork. She wants everyone to be familiar with everyone’s abilities, her eyes linger on you uncomfortably when she mentions combat. You want to yell at her that yes, you’re aware you’re not a veteran of anything other that what happened on the ship and the fight outside the grove. But you leave it alone, assuring her you’ll stay out of the way and be ready to heal everyone. That seems satisfactory for now. So you head down river near the crash site; there’s another ruin that might have some things you can fight inside it.

There’s several things to fight there. Some tomb raiders looking to profit off the crash site and the old ruins. They’re dead the moment they decide to fight; the whole of your group being proficient killers and all. Once they’ve been cleared you get to exploring the inside. It’s fun poking around the old place, it looks like a long forgotten temple to Jergal, or at least that’s what Shadowheart thinks. Further in and a sealed room is found, somehow undisturbed in all this time. But the moment Astarion opens it you’re attacked by skeletons. You keep back as far as you can, only needing to give Karlach and Lae’zel a bit of healing. The skeletons are killed… again. You guess.

Astarion goes back into the room, surely there’s something of value in there. There is. Kind of… The desiccated body in the enormous sarcophagus wakes up and starts shambling about. Asking some in your group cryptic questions and then saying he will see you all again. You’re unsure what to think about it, so you try not to.

But the dead man was right, he does indeed see you all again, back in camp, he’s just there, waiting for you all. Everyone makes their way to him throughout the evening, talking to him and then walking away looking just as puzzled as when you first saw him. Now that you’re safely back in camp your curiosity starts to get the better of you. Maybe you should try talking to him…

“Ah. We meet again, as predicted.” It’s an almost soothing gravely voice.

“You knew we would meet?” You can already see why everyone looks so baffled when they walked away from him.

“And yet, thou dost not desire to be here…” He shakes his head at you, like he’s disappointed.

“Hah. Whatever gave you that idea? Honestly, who even wants to be here?”

“I wonder if thou will answer the call to greatness or will thine own desires be pursued and flee from this calling.”

“What does that mean? What are you even talking about?”

“Thou will learn, in time. As will they.”

“Ugh! You’re impossible!” You throw your hands up, irked by his cryptic nonsense, and you stomp further down the riverbank to pray.

You find a little hidden spot nestled among the boulders and kneel down. Taking out a small knife and lifting your long shirt to expose your thighs and focus your mind on your Maiden. Whispering your words, you drag the blade along your inner thigh and await her grace… Nothing. Nothing happens for what feels like eternity. You say the words again and again take the blade to your flesh, cutting deeper this time and wait… The faintest touch of her divinity reaches you as you feel like crying. You cannot do proper devotions out here with these people around and your goddess is punishing you for your lack of piety.

The next day barely registers to you. You’re all hiking through some area you haven’t been to before, doing… you don’t even remember what you’re supposed to be doing. You’re still brooding over what the dead man, Withers, said and the seeming loss of your goddess’ favor.

There’s shouting coming from the head of the group as everyone spreads out to fight. Shadowheart yells at you to get back and get down, stay out of sight. You look around, completely taken off guard, when you see several gnolls. There’s one that’s bigger and more ferocious than the others charging in your direction and you freeze. Astarion grabs you, shoves you down by a rocky ledge, and glares at you before running into the fray. You feel utterly useless.

Your head throbs in that weird connection way, Astarion does something and the snarling creature stops before it can hurt him. It shivers, snarls then turns on it’s own, tearing them to shreds and then rips out it’s own throat. It’s horrific, but you’re relieved. You didn’t realize he could command that sort of brutality using the worms. And the way he described what it was like is disturbing: the mind of the gnoll was feral, rabid, barely controllable… And controlling it seems to have taken a lot out of Astarion.

Everything happened so fast that you hadn’t even noticed the cave. There’s a couple of Zhentarim guys inside; they’re pretty beat up so you heal them while the blonde one invites you all back to their base for a reward. Everyone decides to put that off for another day, they’re all wiped out. You tend to everyone, feeling fatigued after you’ve gotten them all fully healed; there was a lot of wounds from the fight. The gnolls were vicious; using bows, claws and teeth. If it weren’t for Astarion pushing you out of the way you may well have been among the injured… You almost wish you were, maybe that would appease Loviatar…

The walk back you try to thank Astarion, but he avoids you. Shadowheart chastises you about needing to pay more attention. You don’t bother trying to talk to anyone else, they would all just say the same thing. Camp is no better. Shadowheart and Karlach are drinking together, bonding. Lae’zel glares at you anytime you make eye contact. And Astarion is sitting with Gale, Wyll and Scratch, so you can’t even pet the dog. You feel miserable and just want to go to bed.

But even that is denied you: you’re wracked with fever and a pain you can’t even take solace in. You go down to the river to try and cool off but are attacked by Lae’zel. She throws you against a boulder, pinning you against it with her arm and holding a knife to your throat,

“Can you feel it crawling through you?” She pushes harder into you, “Tendrils squirming in your chest? Your bones popping, your flesh swelling? I can.” She’s not wrong, you feel awful, the worst sickness you’ve ever known, “I see it in you. I feel it in me. We are lost. I will be quick with my blade. First you. Then the others. Then myself.”

“It’s just a fever, Lae’zel. It will pass…” Your fingers dig into the soft mud as you wait for her to do something, anything.

Those damned worms in your heads squirm, her mind and yours tangle together unbidden, and you feel her hesitance as she feels your longing for home, for... Her grip falters as she struggles to slit your throat.

“Bah! I cannot trust my own mind!” She stands, towering over you, still pointing the knife at you, “If it as you say, and just a sickness, then I will wait. But know this: I am watching. If this sickness does not pass come dawn… I will end us all.”

You don’t know how you make it back to your tent or even how you drift into rest, but you do, only to have your dreams haunted by some new madness. You dream of an impossibly beautiful man, in shining armor no less, his features are so familiar yet you can’t recall anyone who looks like him, it unsettles you. And this perfect man tells you that he’s the reason you still live; he saved you from the crash and now he’s keeping you, all of you, from transforming. He speaks of a great battle for the fate of the world, a fight you could help in, if only you embraced the parasite. He wants you to do something and all you feel is fear and loathing. You have never had any interest in grand adventures nor fantasies of saving the world; what does he want from you? He sends you back to your dreams, and you wake feeling cold and lost.

Everyone wakes the next day with having had similar dreams with different looking entities speaking to them; that only makes you more suspicious of the one in your dream. For once you feel like Lae’zel has it exactly right, this dream figure is some sort of mind flayer trick and should not be trusted. Though it seems you’re the only one to agree with her. First the skeleton weirdo and now this random man I your dreams, both telling you to rise to some challenge and all you want to do is go the fuck home!

Today everyone will venture out together again, this time to see those Zhentarim guys; they may have some information about what’s going on around here regarding the goblins and their camp, and maybe, you hope, some good shopping… Alas, your arrival at the little village is nothing but more carnage left in the wake of the horde; this must be what the goblins were up to while the rest of your group was otherwise occupied. The others rush in to help while you stay back to heal any survivors. Unfortunately most are dead, you’re able to help a few, one of them being some woman Wyll knows. She’s aghast at his new appearance, but settles herself enough to tell him that these goblins are working with Drow warriors and that they’ve captured some noble, Duke Ravenguard. A name you recognize from home, but apparently he’s Wyll’s father, everyone grows concerned and begins to intensely argue about something.

You continue to heal the soldiers, Karlach brings you a weeping man who’s badly burned. You almost want to let him pass out from shock before treating him, his wailing grates on your nerves, but you heal him, feeling the last of your magic drain away. You’ve never had to use it so much before, it’s exhausting in a way that’s different from physical exertion. You sit on the edge of the fountain, breathing deeply, as the others continue their discussion or whatever. You want to go back to camp, drink, laugh, goof off, anything other than think about everything that’s happening right now. Maybe Shadowheart will be of the same mind, she’s been out of sorts too, you could both do with some relaxation.

The whole walk back is spent mapping out how to get into the goblin camp to rescue not only the druid, if he still lives, but the Duke as well. Lae’zel is fine with continuing to postpone looking for her people but wants this whole goblin thing taken care of quickly so that she may resume her search. There will be an infiltration team and an assault team. You will be going in with Shadowheart and Astarion as the infiltration team; you assume it’s because your healing magic may be needed so Shadowheart can concentrate on fighting…

Camp is tense. Gale cooks again, Astarion is reading by the fire,Lae’zel and Karlach are down by the river sparing while Wyll paces nervously all over: Scratch close on his heels, awaiting the occasional pat. And you and Shadowheart watch it all, perched atop therocky outcrop by Astarion’s tent, this time sharing one bottle of wine, instead of downing one each. Wishing to just escape the oppressive atmosphereyou continue to talk about being a Paramour back home. It felt good to tell Shadowheart about it, and now she’sfascinated by it,

“So, if you had to pick one of our warrior women as a patron, who would it be?”

“Hmm… Lae’zel might be fun,” You muse, she’s certainly aggressive enough.

“Yeah, if you enjoy losing a pound of flesh in the process!” You give her a look and a nudge with your elbow, “Lady preserve me, I forgot who I’m speaking to.” She elbows you back, “Okay, whataboutKarlach?”

“Hmm… No. She seems too genuinely sweet. She’d forget that it’s all pretend.”

“True…”

“Although… her fiery touch could be an interesting experience…” You smile knowingly and Shadowheart rolls her eyes at you.

“How about the boys?”

“Wyll,withhis whole savior complex thinggoing onwould never even set foot inside The Chateau. Or he would refuse any such an activityon principle alone, if he’s anything like his father is rumored to be. Gale… Hmm… Hemight be more interested in Ana’s services than mine. And Astarion…” You stareat him for a longmoment, “He’d be one of us. He’s too good at the game not to be.” You think of all the times you’ve beenalone with him: the way he makes your heart race and desire to pool in your stomach, that indescribable pull that’s so similar to His…

With dinner cleared away and evening turning to night most everyone starts to head to their tents. You’re enjoying the warmth of the fire on your face, a small distraction as you try not to think too much about tomorrow. You don’t know how long you sit there when you start to let your eyes close for longer… and longer…

You feel weight pressing down on your chest, you try to move but can’t.You open your eyes to seewhat’s happening only to findAstarion hovering over you, mouth open, about to bite…

“...Shit.” He pulls away as you slowly sit up, “No, no - it’s not what it looks like. I swear!” He crouches back on his heels, poised to stand as you try to say something, but he cuts you off, “I wasn’t going to hurt you!”

“Wait, what?” Your heart starts racing… Did he just say he wasn’t going to hurt you?

“I just needed - well…” His eyes stare into yours, “Blood.”

You furrow your brow, processing what he just said. You lean in closer to him and take a long look at him in the dimming firelight. It finally dawns on you; you’ve never once seen him eat anything, you’ve seen him sneaking out after everyone is asleep and he was strangely insistent about leaving the dead boar alone…

“You… You’re a vampire?”You can’t help the tingle it sends up your spine.

“It’s not what you think,I’m not some monster!” He pauses, and you smile, “I feed on animals! Boars, deer, kobolds,whatever I can get.”

“Uhuh...”You shift to sit more comfortably, daintily tucking your legs to one side, leaning on one arm, your shirt falling off the opposite shoulder as you do.

“It’s just that I'm too slow right now. Too weak to hunt.” He continues as his eyessearch yours.

You quietly listen to him, not sure how you should be reacting. You’redistracted by the thought of him biting you, hurting you. It sends such a wave of desire through you,it’s almost too much to hide, so youdon’t,

“So… you’re hungry?” You lean towards him, tipping your head towards your raised shoulder, leaving your neck fully exposed.

“Yes…” His hand reaches out to you, sliding over your collar bone to gently wrap around your neck, his thumb on your pulse, “I only need a taste,” His eyes darken as he looks at where his thumb rests.

“Whatever you need, you can take from me,” Your eyes fix on his lips.

“Do you trust me?” It’s a whisper against your skin as he moves closer.

“Yes,”

“Really?” You feel his lips brush your skin, they part as his mouth opens.

“And… I don’t mind,” He pauses, his teeth poised on your flesh, “If it hurts…”

At that he ravenously bites down into your neck as he pushes you back onto the ground, moving closer, straddling your hips, pinning you down. You moan before you can control yourself. Yourbody shivers, arching your back into him, your thighs squeezing together, your hands grasping the loose front of his shirt. His teeth dig in deeper; his breath growingragged as you feel your blood leaving your body, flowing into his. The glorious sensationat your neck and the loss of blood makingyour head grow hazy:it’ll be too much soon.You don’t care, you want this moment to last forever.But some small part of you stirs you to speak,only to find you have no voice. You struggle against the pull of oblivion,

“Astarion…Astarion, please…” Youbarely get the words out, pleading, begging him… But to stop, or continue? Your hands tremble against his chest, gaining his attention.

His fangs pull out from your neck, a sweet stinging feeling, and Her grace returning…

“Ah! Of course.” He inhales sharply, but he doesn’t move away from you, instead you feel his breath tickling where your blood startswellingup and drippingdown your neck, “That,” His tonguefollowsthe trailback to hispunctures, a soft moan escaping his lips, “That was amazing,” You feel his weightshift as he leans back, looking up at the night sky, “I feel… happy.”

You watch him bask in his elation, thinking how you want more… You bring your handup to thewound, letting your fingertips dip into the painful divots left by his teeth before you closethem. He looks down at you, a different hunger now lingering in his eyes as he takes in the site of your disheveled state. Blood smeared on your hand, your shirt scrunched upexposing your stomach, your unbound hair a wild tangle of red waves under you, and what you can only imagine to be the most desperateofdesirous look on your face.

“Now, if you’ll excuse me,” He stands and brings you up with him, holding you close, “You’re invigorating,” His hand holds your chin to make you look up at him, “But I need something more… filling.”

“Sorry I’m not enough to satisfy you,” You give him a devious pout of a smile.

“You were more than satiating,” He nuzzles along your jaw to your ear, “This is a gift… I won’t forget it,” It’s a gentle whisper in your ear as you close your eyes, your world fading to darkness.

Chapter 5

Chapter Text

1.

You startle awake, sitting up too quickly, feeling dizzy, lightly panting, sweaty… frustrated… The last thing you remember was Astarion’s lips on your neck… Your fingers brush the spot where he bit you, making you shiver. Why do you feel like his around him? Unable to settle back down you stand up, and stumble into the soft predawn light where he’s waiting for you,

“Good morning. How do you feel?”

It’s a loaded question. How could you possibly confess to all the ways he makes you feel?

“Fine, I guess… A bit lightheaded.” You can admit that much as you try to smile, only to feel the world tilt.

“It’ll pass,” He steps closer so you can hold onto him as you sway, you tangle your fingers into the front of his shirt as his hands gently grip your upper arms, “Just be glad I’m not a true vampire,” You squint your question, so he continues, “Otherwise you might wake up as a vampire spawn, like my good self.”

“I suppose I should count myself lucky then,” You smile and let yourself lean into him, your forehead resting on the exposed skin of his open shirt, “Is that why you’re able to walk in the sun?”

Your understanding of vampires is just from scary stories told in hushed voices to scare each other as children. You knew they existed, but never thought about how they work.

“No. Honestly, I should be cinders in thelight,” He ponders a moment, “But it seems something wants me alive…Like the rules have been rewritten,” He takes a slow, deepbreath, “In all my 200 years, nothing like this has ever happened. At least,not that I’veheard.”

“I see…” You’re less dizzy now,but you don’t want to move.

Instead, he does, his hands that were holding your arms now moving; one to your waist, the other to the base of your neck, his thumb brushing your collar bone. He bends down to nuzzle into where his mouth had been last night,

“There’s something I wanted you to know,” He pauses, his breath cool on your skin, “You were my first…In all my time as a vampire I only ever fed on beasts. Drinking the blood of people… well…That’s another thing entirely… You were delectable.” His lips open against your neck, teasing you.

“I’m your first, am I?” You can’t help the silly grin spreading over your lips as he raises his head to look down at you, “And you think I’m delectable?” The dizziness is gone, replaced by another heady feeling. You let your hands slide up his chest to rest on his shoulders, stand on tiptoe to gently brush your nose under his chin and whisper, “I suppose the nice thing to do would be to let you have another taste.”

“Really?” His grip tightens and his breath catches.

“Anytime.” You go back downandlook up at him, “I’m at your beck and call.” You give your best sultry smileas you walk away from him, his hands letting go of you as the others start to emerge from their tents.

2.

You go down to the fire pit and get it started while Gale brings ingredients for some basic breakfast. You have no idea how to cook really, so you just help Gale. You hear Shadowheart and Karlach making their way over while Wyll and Astarion are already lounging across the fire from you, Scratch happily laying between them. You can’t help your eyes constantly drifting over to look at him only to find he’s looking at you too. The girls sit just as Gale says the food is ready but asks where Lae’zel is. His answer comes quickly enough as she comes running, shouting something,

“Dragon!!” She waves her hands to get everyone’s attention, a spyglass clasped in one of them, “I’ve seen a red dragon. My kin are near, we must hurry to where I saw it landing.”

“But I thought we were gonna kick some goblin ass today?”

“Hush teethling! You do not understand how critical it is that we find my people so that we can be cleansed of these parasites!” Lae’zel shouts at Karlach before she turns to Wyll, “And before you say anything, I understand that you wish to rescue your father and help these people, but it is crucial that we attend to our own problems before that of others.”

Wyll breaths deeply, scrunching up his face before responding, “I suppose you’re right. We wouldn’t be able to help anyone if we become mind flayers.” Wyll nods his head, “We should get going.”

“A dragon?You want us to go to where you saw a dragon?”Astarion takes the words right out of your mouth.

“The red dragons serve Githyanki. I will see to it that is does you no harm,” Lae’zel tries to be reassuring.

“Wouldwe even be able to get to wherever it is before it takes off again?”Shadowheart gives her a disbelieving glare.

“Are we all just going to ignore the fact that she called me a ‘teethling’?” Karlach interjects before Lae’zel can answer.

“Yes!” Theysay in unison.

“Fine. It will only be the fastest out of us to go. We will get the information we require and return for the rest of you. Is that acceptable?” Her ire accentuates every word.

“Yes, Lae’zel, that’s acceptable.” Shadowheartmatchesher icy tone, “Who’s the fastest?”

“Wyll, Karlach, and myself I believe to be the fastest.” She looks at each of them as she says their names, “Are you two ready to leave now?”

“So, you do know my name.” Karlach gives Lae’zel and impish grin, “Let’s fucking go!”

You watch them run up the hill and disappear, relief flooding your body as you thank Shadowheart for that. She doesn’t trust the Gith or their cure, she’d rather take her chances with the druid; but that will have to wait yet another day. She goes off to clean up with Gale while you sit next to Astarion. You try to keep last night and earlier this morning out of your mind as you bemoan how nothing seems to be working out. He laughs and suggests maybe going to call on Auntie Ethel, she did invite you for tea. Honestly, tea with crazy sounds wonderful, you really need something to distract you. You let Shadowheart know before getting ready and setting off.

The two of you wander the maze of sand banks and sodden paths for a while, still unable to see her house. There’s a side path leading up and away from the mud that Astarion insists on taking, maybe you’ll be able to see something from up there. You follow behind him only to have a foul stench invade your nostrils. You look around for the source of the offending smell and see an older man a little ways in from where you stand.

“Ah, stranger. Pardon the aroma,” He says pleasantly while you crinkle your nose in disgust, “Powdered iron-vine. An old hunter’s trick. Keeps most monsters from wanting to make a meal of me.”

“Can’t imagine why,” You mutter, takinga half step back:gods it’s an awful stench.

“You’re a monster hunter?” Astarion looks him up and down, “I thought all Gur were vagrant cut throats.” There’s an edge to his voice, you remain silent, watching him closely.

“Ah, yes. We steal chickens, curse crops and seduce daughters.” The stranger looks to youwith an imploring look, “Your friend here has heard it all, I’m sure. But my people aren’t really like that. We’re simple travelers. I’m a monster hunter among my tribe, not some vagabond cutthroat.”

“So, you say,” You say in a calm soft voice, unsure how to be acting; you’ve not had dealings with any Gur, but Astarion’s strange behavior unsettles you.

“Surely, you’re hunting something terrifying. Dragon? Cyclops? Kobold?” Astarion continues to speak, venom behind his words.

“Nothing so dramatic. I’ve been tasked with hunting a vampire spawn. His name is Astarion.” The stranger turns a genial smile on you, he looks to not be on his guard.

Astarion flinches at the man’s words, fear in his eyes before they grow cold, dangerous. You don’t know why, and you don’t really care why this man is looking for Astarion, but you hate him for it. Astarion’s eyes meet yours, and holding his gaze you respond to the stranger,

“And I suppose you’d kill this Astarion when you find him?”The thought of anything happening to him scares you. You don’t know when or how, but Astarion has started to supplant your harlequin in your mind, and now you’d do almost anything to keep him beside you.

“No. I’ve been tasked with capturing him and bringing him back to Baldur’s Gate.” The mannotices you’re no longer focused on him.

“Well, he can’t be that dangerous if it’s only a spawn. Not like a real vampire.” You smile meekly, a slight coquettish wave of your hand as you try to look innocent, helpless, anything to hold his full attention.

“Oh, I don’t know. I’m sure a vampire spawn could still rip out your throat if it felt like it.” Astarion smiles at you cruelly, re-positioning himself so that he can reach for his daggerunnoticed by the Gur.

“He’s right. A vampire spawn is only weak when compared to their master. And they’re at their most formidable at night, when they hunt,” The man returns his focus to you while he speaks, seemingly concerned for your safety.

“How frightening! It sounds as thoughthey cancreep right up on you while you’re trying to sleep.” You let your lower lip tremble, placing a hand to your heart in feigned fear, tryingto keep your eyes from looking at Astarion:he’s almost behind the Gur.

“You should post a guard at night just to be sure.Though the trail has gone cold, I do not think he is near here.”He smiles at you reassuringly and you let a soft relived smile grace your lips.

“I think that can be arranged.” You hold the man’s gaze, your smile broadeninginto something cruelas Astarion raises his dagger, “What do you think, Astarion?”

“Astarion?! No, it can’t be!” The Gur exclaims, suddenly lurching forward,grabbingyou, swinging you between him and Astarion, his arm wrapping around your shoulders, pinning you to him.

How could this old man move so quickly? Astarion is able to stop before he stabs you instead,

“No! Let her go!”

But the Gur only tightens his grip on you as you try to wriggle free:he’s too strong. He reaches for his own blade and holds it to your throat,

“Hold still, you’re not my quarry, but I will use you if I have to.” He presses the blade down hard enough to draw blood.

“Argh!” You struggle harder in his grasp. This is the third time you’ve been held at knife point, and you cannot tolerate it anymore! Your fury at being helpless fuels your retaliation, “I fucking dare you!” You lean hard into the blade, letting it cut deeper, the pain sharp and sweet mixes with your adrenaline.

Your willingness to do harm to yourself throws the Gur off and Astarion takes the opportunity to grab you. He pulls you away, bringing hisdagger down into the unsuspecting man’s neck, where hedrops to the ground, quickly bleeding out into the dirt.Astarion turns to look at you, your arm still in his grasp,

“Well, that’s not exactly how I thought that was going to end.”

He looks at where you’re bleeding and breaths heavily, pupils dilating.Your darkness is stirred up from the fight, from the look in his eyes… your need for more overcomes you,

“Hungry?” You smile, tiltingyour head back to expose the gash, letting the blood flow down.

He moves in, tongue sliding up your neck to the gash, sucking lightly before pulling back to look at you, your blood smeared on his lips,

“I really am growing to like this whole thingyou have going on.” He gives you thatwicked grin as his eyes devour you,makingyou quiver, “And, I don’t think I’m wrong in thinking you like me, too.”

“Whatever gave you that idea?” Your eyes fix on his mouth ashe speaks.

“These little shakes and stifled moans when I…” He bends his head down again and softly bites where he had last night, not breaking the skin, “was getting lost in your delicious neck.” You grasp onto him, your body shaking,pressingwantonlyinto him, “And…What was it you said? About being at my beck and call…”

“I live to serve.” You respond, your voice breathy and low.

“Gods, I’ve wanted you since the moment I first laid eyes on you.” His breath tickles your skin before finally biting down hard:you savorthe sharp cold feeling of him consumingyou.

His bite turns into hungry kisses along your jaw and up to your lips. You taste the metallic tang of your blood, revel inthe softness of his lips on yours as you open your mouth to his. His hands gripping your hips as your fingers tangle in his white curls. He’s not your harlequin, but Maiden forgive you, Astarion makes you feel like he does: you want him to be your ruin.

Astarionpushes you back into a boulder as his hands liftyour chainmail up to work at the laces at the front of your pants. Your own hands tugging at the lacing at the front of his before he turns you around. Your pants arepulled down to your knees, the weight of the chainmail being bunched up around your waist before you finally feel him slide into you. He’s perfect, stretching you, filling your searing hot wetness as you clench your fists waiting. His hands holdyour hips as he starts to move.

You want him to dig his fingers into your flesh. You want him to shove you roughly against the boulder, make you arch your back painfully as you’re caught between the rock and his hardness. You want him to make you cry out in glorious agony. But that’s not what he’s doing. None of the fierceness that was in his eyes is in his grip. It’s a perfectly firm grip; strong but not painful. He’s not grasping you like he’s desperate for you. He thrusts into you with measured precision, every move practiced perfection. Not like how he was just ferociously kissing you, but like he’s performing a task… He’s working. It’s not you he wants, but something from you; and it’s not even to lose himself in you as you wanted to lose yourself in him…

It’s an act you know all too well, and you easily fall into it. You moan, whimper, shiver and tighten up around him as you have done many times before for your patrons… You feel disgust rising in your throat. You want to push him away from you. You want to scream at him that if didn’t want you, then he needn’t have fucking bothered… Instead, you surrender to your own misery, let it wash over you, wallow in it as you let yourself be used.

It’s over. You feel him pull outofyou and say something. You didn’t hear him, but you keep your face pleasant and your body responsiveto his lingering caress. You are a consummate professional and this is no different than working at The Chateau.

You turn away from him to clean yourself up, heal and fix your pants. As you do, he excitedly points out that he can see Auntie Ethel’s house. You give him a banal smile as he places a hand on the back of your neck and leads the way. And that’s when you feel Her again, a faint fluttering of Her blessing on you.

Ethel welcomes you both in as she demands her other guest clean her plate. She’s a rather forlorn looking woman who complains about being unable to finish, she’s too full. Ethel grows increasingly irate and makes the woman disappear entirely. As surprised as you are, you’re relieved you won’t have to listen to the woman’s bleating anymore; you’re in no mood. Ethel puts on a kettle as she looks you and Astarion over, noting how you look terrible. You laugh, terrible doesn’t even begin to describe how you’re feeling right now. You let Astarion tell her of your troubles, the mind flayer parasite being chief amongst them. At hearing that she offers to help, but first she will need to change…

She shivers as an eerie green magic envelopes her whole body, transforming the old woman into a Hag… Not just her, but the whole place changes. What was once an idyllic cottage and bucolic wetlands warps into a decrepit bower surrounded by a murky bog. You guess it has its own sort of grotesque charm.

Ethel shakes out her shoulders, complaining of how cramped it was being in that old crone’s body before offering you both a seat as she finishes making tea. Astarion declines, alluding to already having had his thirst quenched. You try not to let him see you flinch as you take a cup and sip, wishing the conversation would return to her helping with the parasites.

Her help would mean sacrificing an eye; something neither you nor Astarion are interested in doing. Though she is disappointed by your disinterest, she is happy when you ask for more tea and for her to tell you more stories. You’re there for a long while before she says she has business that needs tending to. But before you go, you apologize for the dead man in her bog. She only cackles and says her Red Caps will see to it, no bother.

The walk back you try to keep up pleasant conversation; mostly laughing about Ethel’s wild tales and trying to figure out how she would have removed your parasites or what she would have done with your eyes had you agreed. He keeps holding you in one way or another; a hand on the back of your neck, an arm around your shoulders, a hand holding yours helping on unsteady ground then lingering after having cleared it. Every time it makes your heart race and your darkness wake with a craving for more.

As you approach camp, he stops touching you, moving away to walk ahead and you don’t know if you’re relieved or not. Why does the darkness in you yearn for him like it does for your harlequin? Why does Astarion draw Loviatar’s attention? Why now do your prays offer Her nothing, but his torment of you does? Is it his torment? Or is it simply being near him? Everything is muddled in your head, and you can’t think straight.

Upon entering the camp, you rush off to Shadowheart; she’s sitting by the fire as Gale cooks dinner. You settle down between her and Gale as Astarion sits across the fire from the three of you. Gale says they will discuss the day’s events with dinner, Lae’zel needed some time to process what happened. It sounds like it’ll be an interesting conversation at the very least. You keep close to Shadowheart and Gale until dinner is ready.

Lae’zel grumbles about the Gith she found not being what she was hoping for, one of her superiors, Voss or something like that, is acting strangely, she didn’t find out where a creche is and she’s utterly furious at further delaying her cleansing. You want to point out that the druid may yet prove helpful, but you know she’d only rebuff any suggestion other than continuing to look for her people. But with that whole mess dealt with it’s decided to go forward with the goblin camp plan tomorrow. Astarion suggests giving the ogre’s bonehorn to Wyll, their help may prove useful if it comes to fighting your way out. You get up to fetch it, Astarion joins you; you didn’t need help, but he insists on accompanying you and you can’t do anything other than smile and thank him for his chivalry. You rush to grab the horn before he even has a chance to speak to you, thrusting it into his grasp as you squeeze passed him and return to the others.

After everything is settled you keep close to Shadowheart, fearing being caught alone, even asking her if you can share her tent tonight. She assumes it’s pre-battle jitters and tries to reassure you, but truthfully you fear Astarion. The thought of him coming to you, asking you for a repeat of earlier scares you because you wouldn’t say no… You curl up in a bedroll next to Shadowheart, her hand holding yours to calm you, but you can’t stop thinking about Astarion. Why does it hurt so good? You crave more, you want him to… No, no that’s what you wanted from your harlequin. He’s the one that you want to submit yourself to, body and soul. He’s the one you want to be devoured by… Right?

3.

The next morning is a flurry of gathering supplies, checking armor and weapons and rechecking everything as everyone prepares for an arduous day. You’re nervous, but you don’t know what’s occupying your mind more; Astarion or the goblin camp. You have to focus; you have to push down the needs of your darkness to concentrate on the day ahead. You can do this; you can be helpful. Shadowheart and Karlach have been helping you with sword practice, you think you can handle defending yourself. You still remember a few spells from growing up in the grove, so you’ve been tasked with sending up a signal fire should assistance be required. You are ready… Or at least as ready as you can be given… everything.

It begins to lightly rain as your infiltration trio approaches the main entrance of the camp coming from the road. Astarion walks ahead of you and Shadowheart so he can be the first to speak with the goblins guarding the bridge. There’s a rather intimidating number of them here with two more of those large wolf like dog things you’d seen at the fight in front of the grove, gods they’re big. The goblin standing next to it calls out to Astarion,

“Look here Klaw! Supper’s ‘ere! Unlessyou got another reason to be here, feck-shite.”

You can feel that awful connection at the back of your mind as Astarion smiles menacingly,

“Stand aside, vermin.” He gives his command using the worm and it makes even you shiver.

“I… erm…” The goblin shifts uneasily, “Down Klaw! Bad girl!” He vents his surprised frustration on the beast, “Easy, lads! We got a True Soul comin’ through!” He bows slightly.

“Have you captured a druid, Halsin?” Shadowheart steps forward, her own face looking like she is utterly disgusted with the goblin.

“Don’t know any Halsin, your excelness.” He bows even deeper.

“Useless.” Astarion sneers.

“He would have been with a group of others, adventurer types. We were told they had been captured.” She glares down at him.

“O-oh! One of them thieves? If he ain’t dead, he’d be in the pits with the rest of ‘em.” He manages to stutter and gestures further into the camp.

Shadowheart doesn’t even register his response, simply begins to stride passed him, swiftly followed by Astarion and you. As you walk you look up at Astarion’s face, he looks positively giddy at the worm thing working again, Shadowheart looks less pleased,

“You should be more careful with that Astarion,” Shadowheart looks at him warily.

“Now, hold on, this little parasite has some very useful powers that I fully intend on using. Any power willingly given is a power well received. You agree with me?” He gestures at you while Shadowheart purses her lips.

“I mean… It was really easy to get in.” You’re excited that it worked so well,“Plus,they think we’re one of them. One of these ‘True Souls’, whatever that is. No one is going to question us poking around now. You have to admit this is agreatstart to this whole thing,” You sweep your arm around at everythingas you continue to walk down the crumbling bridge.

You manage to get about halfway across when your brain throbs, your worm writhing at the intrusion of an overwhelming presence. You clutch your head and double over in excruciating pain. It subsides only enough for you to hear words reverberating inside of your head. A command like the one Astarion gave, but so much more powerful,

“Hear my voice. Obey my command.”

The voice is irresistible, inescapable. It shrouds your world in darkness, nothing else is exists in this void until it shows you three figures; an armored older elf, a pale young woman and a young man that makes you grimace.

“These are my Chosen. They speak for me. Aid their search for the Prism, and you will be worthy to stand beside them. In my presence.”

It’s enticing and revolting, and you writhe on the ground at this violation until an unexpected soothing sensation washes over you. You can see the world around you again; Shadowheart and Astarion are on the ground as well. There’s a small object floating over you; quivering, shaking, glowing, pulsing, pushing the voice out of your mind, but as the voice recedes it speaks again,

“My power grows. My forces gather. The reckoning draws near…”

With the voice gone you’re able to move again, rising from the cold wet stone, onto your feet and going to look at the others. Suddenly the object flies to your chest and you instinctively clutch it to you. It feels like it wants you to hold it, but you’ve never seen this thing before, have you?

“What just happened? How did you get that?!” Shadowheart rushes to your side, confused frustration contortingher pretty face.

“I don’t know, it just sort of flew to me.” You hold the thing out to her, attempting to hand it back, “What is it anyway?”

She stares at your outstretched hand, at the object and shakes her head,

“I don’t know what it is. All I know is that it’s very important I get it back to Baldur’s Gate. At any cost.” She pushes your hand back into you, “Just hold onto it for now. That thing has a mind of its own. Something tells me it won’t let me take it back anyway.”

“Is that little thing really responsible for keeping all of us safe?” Astarion spooks you as he peers down over your shoulder at the thing.

"I guess so…” You hold it back out to her, “Look, please just see if it lets you take it back. I don’t want it, but you do. If it makes it’s way back to me then I’ll just have to give it back to you again. Maybe it’ll eventually take a hint.”

“Thank you.” Shadowheart takes it and shoves it back into her armor where you hope it stays.

The camp is a raucous celebration of death and destruction. The goblins have overrun the ruins, their filth and stench permeating everything they’ve touched, the rain only accentuating it. There’s a bard trapped in a cage in the middle of it all, Shadowheart recognizes him, but no sooner does she go to him does a goblin go to the cage to remove him, whisking him off into the crumbling building at the back of the courtyard. She shrugs and suggests that the three of you walk around for a bit, get the lay of the land, and maybe get some more information as to what to expect inside. She will worry about the bard later, if there’s time.

There are a few places that seem promising for making a quick getaway, one spot that even looks to be a weak wall leading to the inside of the temple. Astarion manages to remove a few stones to peek inside. It looks like an unused area that you may be able to get to once inside. He and Shadowheart manage to speak with a few of the goblins, they tell of an angry Drow woman inside that is the one in charge here. There’s a couple of others, but the Drow is the one to avoid.

With all of the courtyard explored you head over to the heavy wooden doors of the temple itself. A large ogre stands before them but lets you all pass without a word, but inside there’s another set of guards. These goblins would also bar your progress, but Astarion again steps forward to exert his command over them. They cower and offer everything they know; the priestess is in the great hall just beyond the entrance, there’s a hob goblin doing something in the altar room beyond the hall and the Drow has taken up her office beside the altar room. And then finally, the prisoner is in the dungeon, they gesture off to the right but aren’t very specific. Astarion simply looks down his nose at the goblin as he strides away, you and Shadowheart following his lead. Something about the way he looks so pleased makes you smile.

You go into the great hall and see the priestess but go straight to the stairs on the right. Hopefully you can ignore all of the leaders of this place. The first room you see has a man strung up on a rack being worked over by two goblins. They’re asking him questions and he shouts and whimpers incoherently. The three of you have no use for whatever is happening in there, so you continue on. As you approach the next room you hear the unmistakable sound of a lash striking flesh, making you long for home. You look into the room to see a man kneeling in prayer, the words and motions burned into your memory. Your lips silently follow along as you drift into the room. The kneeling man hears you; he stops his devotions, rises and turns to greet you… You know his face!

“Pain Abdirak?” You rush to him, your hands reaching out to him.

“Sister Talia?” He looks at you in disbelief, “By the grace of Loviatar, how is it that you come to be here my child?” Hegripsyour arms affectionately.

“That is something best told withdrinks anda good lashing,” You smile warmly at him, finally, someone normal! His eyebrows raise in a silent question, “But speaking of lashings, would you serve me my penance? It has been an age since I’ve been able to pay proper homage to our Maiden.”

“It would be the greatest of pleasuresyou could bestow uponme,” His smile widens, “I do remember the last time I was given the immense privilege of administering your devotions.” His fingers wriggle with anticipation before releasingyou to grab his cat o’ nine.

Youjust about floatover to the desk and begin to strip. Maybe now you will finally feel Her blessing upon you, the last faint touch being whenAstarion had fucked you in the wilderness, your mental anguish at his misuse of you and your desire for more pleasing Her. Your mind is brought back from your ruminations when you hear Shadowheart,

“Ahem?” She looks at you, her eyes wide and moving from you to Abdirak and then back, “Really?”

“It won’t take long, I promise!” You liftthe chainmailup over your head letting itdrop onto the desk,thenstart to lift up your padded tunic, “It’s been too long since I’ve been able to pray properly, you know what it's like.” You appeal to her shared life as a cleric to a darkand unforgiving goddess.

“Fine.” She holds her hands out to you, “I’ll hold your clothes. And…” She starts to say something, but you’ve already moved on to removing your boots and pants.

“Thank you!” You gotopile your things in her hands, butfeel Astarion’s eyesboring into you,“Yes?”You ask arching an eyebrow. Why is he looking at you like that?

“Nothing.” He leans back, looking you up and down, a hand draped over his mouth, “By all means, do continue.”

You shrug and walk over to the little alcove Abdirak had been at only moments ago. Thereareshackles hanging downfrom the top of the little arch,you reach your hands up and he closesthemaround your wrists. They’re cold and sharp, you feel them pleasantly digging in as you focus your mind on your Maiden of Pain.

Abdirak gives no warning, you just hear the hiss of the whip then the strikeagainst your back, a series of searing stripes across your skin. He speaks, words of encouragement, words of approval as you cry out. Heat spreads from your back to your core as you begin burn with desire. Another strike and you shudder, hearing whispered words from Shadowheart and Astarion before Abdirak’s voice drowns them out,

“Your voice sounds so sweet, dear one! Let our Loviatar hear you!”

His next strike is his last and his most punishing. You cry out with such devotion, such passion… such lust… Your skin splits open, blood trails down your back, over your rear; you press your thighs together, sliding them back and forth, mixing your blood with the wetness dripping down. Abdirak’s footsteps are soft as he comes to free you from your bonds,

“My beautiful, penitent child, The Maiden has found your performance inspiring!” You can feel him trembling with Her divine presence, “Thank you, my dear one,” He releases your hands, “You are always a pleasure to administer to, may you be blessed by Her grace.”

“And you are always a master at administeringHer gifts. Thank you Pain Abdirak,” And you do feel Her, truly feel Her. She blesses you once again as she had always done before. If only Abdirak could join you

You sway your hips as you saunter to the desk; smiling to yourself as you bring your hands up to your shoulders letting your magic close your bleeding gashes. You stand before Shadowheart asking her if she’ll help you clean up before putting everything back on. She rolls her eyes and motions for you to turn around. As you do you look passed her at Astarion as he focuses on you. He’s hiding most of his face behind a hand, but his eyes he can’t hide. He’s ravenous…

Chapter 6

Chapter Text

1.

You finish dressing and Shadowheart turns to leave the room. Before you can follow Astarion steps in front of you, a hand finding its way to your waist, stopping you from stepping away from him.

“Care to explain what that just was?” He speaks softly, arching a brow.

“Nothing. It was nothing. Don’t worry about it.” You giggle nervously. Shit! He didn’t know! How could you forget that? Your little secret…

“I’m not worried about it… I want to know how you know him, why you did what you just did.” He steps closer, towering over you, looking down at you hungrily.

“Please, just pretend you didn’t see that just now…” You whisper, the feeling of Her blessing mingling with your ever-present need for more making your breath come quickly and your heart to race. His closeness, his touch, not helping…

“You two coming, or what?” Shadowheart looks in from the doorway.

“Yes!” You call out to her, then lower your voice, “See, we have to get going… We have a lot we need to do, so let’s just focus on that, OK Astarion?”

He releases you and you rush over to Shadowheart; she’s ready to move on and be done here. As you continue on, she stops at the next room, she’s spotted the bard and insists on freeing the idiot. She gets the goblin who’s keeping him to go away, then enlists Astarion’s help in freeing him. The bard, now immensely grateful, promises repayment and then vanishes with the help of a potion. Why anyone would want to come to this place for no other reason than curiosity is beyond you.

Your little trio continues right along quietly moving along the right side of the temple narrowly avoiding the goblin leaders, eventually making it to the prison. You walk in only a few steps before you see a bear in one of the cells… He may be the druid! You whisper that to your companions, perhaps staying in his wild shape helped him fare better with the goblin’s treatment of him. Even now there’s a few tormenting the creature. You need to get him out, but there’s so many goblins in here. Astarion smiles,

“Let me handle this,” He confidently walks over to the goblin by the cell.

You stay back a little way with Shadowheart, feeling him use those parasite powers. He commands them to open the cage and they do. The bear immediately tears into the goblins that had just been throwing rocks at him. The other goblins scramble to fight, attacking not just the bear but all of you as well. You put up your shield and draw your sword while Astarion and Shadowheart rush to help the bear. The three of them handily kill everything in the room as you continue to stay out of the way.

The skirmish ends, Shadowheart has a bite on her arm that you close up for her as the bear approaches you, shedding the guise and revealing a behemoth of an Elf,

“You aided a bear, not knowing if it would savage you? You’re a true friend to nature - or perhaps a lunatic.” He smiles with easy kindness.

“I’d say lunatic. Don’t know how she convinced me you weren’t going to savage us.” Astarion gives you an impish smirk.

“All I said, was that the bear could be the druid using wild shape as… oh I don’t know! Just that it was probably him!” You fling a hand out towards the druid to demonstrate that you were correct.

Shadowheart calmly puts a hand to your arm and lowers it, stepping into the conversation,

“We were sent by Nettie to find you. We need your help.”

“So, I see. But first things first, I am Halsin. And thank you for getting me out.”He has the warmest of smiles as he bows his head to his rescuers.

“You’re welcome.”He’s the first of these druids to be more friendly and it takes you by surprise, “You see, we need help wi-”

He interrupts you by holding his hand up towards your face,

“That look on your face, I’ve seen it before,” Magic radiates from his hand and you feel it course through you; tentative,warm, searching and then it’s suddenly repelled, “Oak Father preserve you, child…” He stares long and hard into your eyes, you know he felt more than just the parasite and you pray he won’t say anything. The look reminds youof how your aunt would look at you,“You’re infected,” He says in a measured tone, “But you don’t act like the others here. You don’t bow to The Absolute. How is that possible?”

“We really don’t know…” You’re unsure if you should mention the thing Shadowheart has or the dream figure you’ve all seen, so you keep those to yourself, “Are you able to help us?”

“No, I don’t think I can.” His brow furrows, “I’ve been studying these parasites for a while now. There’s strange, powerful dark magic wrapped around them. I was hoping to find out where they’re coming from.” He keeps to only speaking of the parasites, genuine concern in his eyes.

“Oh, I see…” It’s disappointing but somehow not surprising. Absolutely nothing has worked out so far, why would thisbe any different?

“So, you mean to say that coming here was, what? A waste of our time? Gods!” Astarion flings his arms up, exasperated.

“Now, Astarion, we don’t know that for sure. It sounds like he has more to say.” Shadowheart tries to calm him.

“Yes. I came here hoping to find the source. And I think I know where that is, Moonrise Towers. It’s there that I think we would find a way to rid you of these parasites.” Halsin continues.

“OK, well I’d say that is worth the trouble of coming to get him, right?” She saysto Astarion.

“I suppose.” He reluctantly agrees, “Now, how do we get him out of here?”

“A moment, if you would allow me… First, we need to take care ofthe goblin leadershiphere. Otherwise, they’ll attack my grove, I must protect my people and the refugees. But something tells me that if I were to stroll out of here with you, it would not go unnoticed.” He gestures to his over large bulk.

“True… You are rather conspicuous.” Astarion looks Halsin up and down.

“What about all those ladders leading up into the rafters and upper walkways? Think we can get him up to one of those and to where we found the crumbling wall?” Shadowheart helpfully points out your back up escape routes.

“That may be our best chance of getting me out of here without inciting the goblins.” He nods a bit, “Yes. Show me where to go. I’ll get up the ladders.”

2.

Shadowheart and Halsin believe going after the Drow, Minthara, first is the best option. She is the ultimate power here, her demise would throw the rest of the horde into chaos; cutting the head off the snake, so to speak. So, after sneakily killing the goblins just beyond the dungeon, you manage to get Halsin up a ladder and you pray he understood Astarion’s directions. And away you walk into the viper's nest…

You enter her office alone, the sound of her voice reprimanding some sniveling goblin echos in the cavernous room. You look to the shadows, hoping to see Shadowheart and Astarion, but you don’t see them. You’re closer now, the Drow’s attention now shifting from the goblin and you,

“I do not have time for interruptions from underlings.” Her focus now solely on you, her mind reaching out, engulfing yours, shutting out everything but a vision: her vision of a pale woman giving Minthara a mission. You know this woman from when you were crossing the bridge and you saw the Chosen of that voice, “A True Soul in such a grotesque form? The Absolute has a place in Her heart even for darthir. So, faerie, why have you come here?” She looks at you with disdain.

“I was told to report to you upon my arrival.” You can still feel the cold tendrils of her mind brushing against yours as you try to hide your discomfort.

“Then join my hunt. There are thieves that escaped and are hiding somewhere in this wilderness. They stole a weapon that the Absolute seeks. I am sure those wretches have it hidden away somewhere. We will find it amongst the dead and the ashes of their hiding place.” Her anger and frustration causing her mind to further invade yours again.

You feel her need to claim this weapon, her mind probing yours for whatever you might be able to tell her; then you feel it… Anxiety coming from Shadowheart, from that thing she has that saved you… That’s what the Drow is looking for… You fear she will find out what you know. Your heart races as you try to breath slowly, keeping her in your mind as you wait for someone to kill her. And there he is, behind her, silent as the shadows he emerged from. With his blade in hand her grabs her head and drags it across her neck, silencing her before she can sound an alarm. Her mind blessedly gone from yours as you look over to see Shadowheart bludgeoning the goblin who had been in there with you.

Shadowheart quickly comes over to the desk to rifle through the papers laid out on it. Meanwhile your head throbs uncomfortably from the exertion of keeping that woman occupied, Astarion comes to your side, steadying you as you sway slightly. Shadowheart comes back, folding and tucking some parchment into her armor, there will be time to look at everything after you get out of here. One leader down; two to go.

There’s a ladder in Minthara’s office that you all climb up into the rafters, they lead out over the altar room where you see the hob goblin. He’s doing something with the dead body of a mind flayer. There’s so many in there with him, not just goblins but Drow warriors.There’s no way the three of you can take on so many. Astarion is sure he can take him out with a well-placed arrow, hiding in the shadows up here. If nothing else, it would draw the rest of the goblins inside of the temple to one place. Hopefully with that the three of you can then get to where Halsin is and break out. It’s not the greatest plan, but it’s all you’ve got for now. You and Shadowheart start to make your way to thebroken stone walkways while Astarion takes down the hob goblin and then you all run as chaos erupts in the roombelow.

You make it to where you sent Halsin, wavingyour hands frantically, trying to signal him to break down the wall. Halsin nods, smiling as the bear rips into being and lunges at the crumbling stone: light streams in as the three of you jump outinto the sun. You’reon an upper terraceoverlooking part of the courtyard, two or three surprised goblins stare at you all before Halsin mauls them. You run to the balustrade, ignoring the burning in your lungs as you reach up, sendinga fire spellinto the air, hoping to all the gods that the others seeit. You’ve barely put your hand down when you hear theblaring of the horn;they saw your signal.

Your group fights its way down to the main courtyard trying to regroup with the rest of your companions. The ground shakes with the rampaging ogres as they answer the call, flanking the sprinting Karlach and Lae’zel. Halsin and Shadowheart dash off to join the warrior women. You lose sight of Astarion as he climbs up a makeshift barricade. Wyll and Gale keep their distance, blasting goblins with magic. The temple doors burst open, spilling the remaining goblins and Drow into the courtyard, joining the battle. Sending you scrambling for a place you can keep out of the way and still be able to heal everyone: keep them alive.

You’ve never heard such a cacophony before; the screaming of metal cleaving through metal, meat and bone, the cries of the mortally wounded, the smell of blood mixing with filth and mud. Your adrenaline courses through your veins keeping you going as you continuously heal everyone, even the ogres, as wave upon wave of the horde comes to kill you all. You feel yourself being drained as you continue protect everyone. You don’t know how much longer you’ll be able to go on like this…

The sounds of battle fade, replaced by a strange sort of stillness. Karlach and Lae’zel are moving around the battlefield, their weapons sliding into bodies, ending the groans coming from the ground. The ogres following close behind them, taking their due. You walk over to Halsin, he’s bleeding while trying to tend to Wyll, who is also bleeding. You know Halsin is trying to do what he can to help with healing, but his captivity, torture and battle-weary body have rendered him unable to; he can’t even close his own wounds. You insist he rest as you continue tending to everyone’s needs. Your head begins to swim, and you’re unsteady on your feet, but this is the only thing you’re good for, so you force yourself through. It’s only now that you realize you haven’t seen Astarion since the fight broke out,

“Has anyone seen Astarion?” You call out to everyone.

“He was up top,” Karlach points to one of the few remaining towersalong the raised walkway, “There, I think. Raining down arrows.” She gives a smile and thumbs up.

You thank her and find your way up there. You don’t see him immediately, but youdohear him… groaning. You move faster towards the sound to find him on the floor leaning against thestone wall, blood pooling beneath him, a broken javelin lodged in his leg, a dead bugbear near him,

“Can’t imagine how it managed to sneak up on me,” He winceswhile tryingto laugh it off.

“Gods! Astarion why didn’t you say something?” You rush over and kneel down beside himassessing the damage.

“Usually wounds close up on their own…” His easy smile looksstrained, his voice low, you realize he couldn’t shout for help, “But, I think I’ve lost too much blood…”His voice trails off into shallow labored breathing.

You put your hands over the wound trying to call up your magic, but nothing happens, you’ve used it all up, there’s nothing left. He tries to say something, but you interrupt him,

“You just need blood, right?” You move so that you’re in front of him, pulling your chainmail and tunic away from your neck, “So take some.”

He doesn’t say anything, you just feel thatsweet sharpness piercingyour neck as he bites down. You shiver into him, is hands holding you close, your eyes start to flutter, you can’t keep them open. You’re too drained from the battle and healing, you feel yourself losing consciousness. You close your eyes, hearingshoutingsomewhere...

“Get the fuck away from her!” It’sShadowheart, but she sounds so far away.

You struggle to speak as you feel his teeth pull out of you, no sound leaves your lips as he holds a hand up towards Shadowheart,

“Wait! Shadowheart, it’s not what you think!” Astarion’s voice already sounds stronger than it did a moment ago.

“Like hell it is!” She goes to pull you away from him.

“No, Shadowheart, it’s okay.” You finally manage to speak, “I let him. I can’t heal him right now, so this was all I could do…” It takes so much effort to get the words out, “He just needed a little,”

“What do you mean exactly, by ‘this was all’ you could do or that he ‘just needed a little’?” She glares at him while speaking to you, your arm gripped by her.

“Really… It’s…” You never finish telling her:you fade into unconsciousness.

The next thing you’re aware of is Halsin holding you like a child in his arms. You try to move, but he holds you tighter,

“No moving now. Rest. Camp will be set in just a few more minutes.” His gentle smile creases his face as he looks down at you.

“Camp?” Your mind is still foggy.

“Yes. We decided it best to not move you too far. You need to rest… I need to rest,” He laughs softly as he shifts his hold on you.

“You can put me down. I’m OK now.” You push ineffectually against his bulk as he chuckles more.

“Nonsense. I’ll wait for the tent to be ready. I couldn’t help you before, so let me help you now.”

“Thanks.”

You settle into his hold waiting for the tent to be pitched. As soon as it is you get him to just put you down outside of it, you’re capable of getting in on your own. You get in and lay down and stare at the shifting fabric over your head when Shadowheart and Astarion enter,

“So… He’s a vampire?” She whispers angrily at you, “And you’re into it? Why am I not surprised?” You grimace a smile and shrug as she continues, “Well, so long as he’s only biting you, I’m fine with it. But you should really say something to the others before they find out like I did. I can’t imagine they’d take it as easily as I did.”

“If I promise to shout it from the mountain tops would that get you to go away?” You pout and roll to bury your face in the bedroll. Your body is drained of all energy, and you don’t know why she’s so upset. No one could see you up there, he wasn’t going to hurt- well he wasn’t going to kill you.

“No.” She shoves you over with her footbefore dropping some bread and cheese on your chest, “Eat something before you pass out. And you, Astarion, she better be alive in the morning if you don’t want me to ram a stake through your ribs.” She turns on her heel and strides out.

You watch her go before looking over at Astarion, he’s sitting quietly at the edge of your bedroll. You sit in silence for a long while before he speaks,

“You should eat,” He sighs while waiting for you take a bite, “And thank you, for earlier. ThoughI do wish you had told me how drained you were already. I… I would have held back more…” He shifts uncomfortably, “I’m sorry…”

“I’m fine really,” You say between bites, “I just need to eat and get some rest.” You smile at him, attempting to reassure him, but you don’t know if its working, he just sitsstill and stares at you.

“So… Loviatar? …I wasn’t expecting that…” He speaks slowly, watching you closely, like he’s trying to figure something out.

“Yeah.” You continue to eat.

“And you were taken from Baldur’s Gate?”

“...I was. But you knew that, so why ask?” You’ve finish eating and start scrutinizing his face, trying to decipher what he’s thinking about. He told you he’s a magistrate back home, so perhaps he’s heard about The Chateau before…

“No reason. You should get some rest. I’ll stay, in case you need anything in the night.”

“I promise I’m fine. I just overexerted myself.You don’t have to-”

“I know, and it’s partly my doing, so, I’m staying,” His voice is strainedas he interrupts you: his eyes brook no argument.

“Fine,” You pout and snuggle down into the bedroll. You lay on your side facing him for a few minutes before you speak, “…Can I ask you something?”

“If I say, ‘yes’ will you get some rest after?” He glares at you, and you nod, “Then ask.”

“That night… why’d you choose me?” You look up at him as he stays very still, not answering, so you try to clarify, “When you bit me, you could have picked anyone else in camp, so… why me?”

His eyes look away and you imagine a thousand easy lies flitting through his mind before he looks at you again, “I don’t know,” It’s a lie, not the one you were expecting, but a lie all the same, “Why did you let me?”

Your turn to be silent a moment. How could you possibly tell him that its because there’s a darkness in you that makes you crave your own torment, and he sets it aflame? That he reminds you of Him, the stranger you never actually knew, and the only other person to ever make you feel this way?

“I don’t know…” You lie back.

3.

The next morning everyone looks ragged and worn down. Lae’zel and Wyll had insisted on guards being posted all night, lest there be any stragglers or returning raiding parties. Meaning no one but you and Astarion got a full night’s rest. Poor Halsin insists on returning to his grove as soon as the sun if fully risen; he has a great many things to take care of. He invites everyone to join him there once properly rested. Once he’s gone the rest of you spend a slow morning around the ruins.

You and Shadowheart decide to explore inside the temple for a bit, finally noticing that it’s a Selune temple. As you walk the now silent rooms you mildly wonder if Pain Abdirak escaped during the chaos of yesterday. The room he was in is empty and there’s no sign of him. You’re sure he’s fine, this can’t have been his first time getting caught up in something… Can it? You look behind you when you notice Shadowheart isn’t next to you anymore. She’s looking down at a broken statue of Selune, rubbing her hand uncomfortably.

“You, OK?”

“Hm?” She looks up at you startled, “Oh, this?” She turns her hand over for you to see a small black spot, “I’m not sure what it is. It just hurts sometimes. I haven’t figured out why it does or when it will hurt again, so I just ignore it most of the time.”

“It’s not something you’ve been able to heal?” You hold her hand to examine it, you’ve never seen something like it before.

“No. And pain isn’t something to be shied away from, right?” She gives you knowing smirk.

“Well, not in my book.” You return her smirk and continue on exploring.

You make your way around, poking into all the rooms. It’s mostly musty old things from the temple or garbage from the goblins. How can anything want to live in such filth? You move onto a room that has a moving floor, Shadowheart fusses at it while you check around. She does something that makes a stone alcove open up revealing a secret passage. Excitedly the two of you go in. It’s a cave tunnel that leads to a deep dark hole, a ladder descending into the blackness. You want to see how deep it goes, but Shadowheart thinks maybe telling the others before dropping feet first into danger is a better idea. So, you reluctantly follow her back out to the courtyard.

As you walk out into the sunshine you hear the cutest little cooing sound and Karlach squealing,

“LOOK AT IT!!” She’s crouched down looking at some small animal… It’s an owlbear cub, “I’m keeping it!”

“Karlach, we can’t keep it.” Wyll groans down at the two of them.

“Awww! Why not?” She turns a pleading face on him.

“Well, I mean… What are we supposed to do with it?”

“What do you mean ‘do with it’? We’re keeping it, that’s what we’re doing with it.”

“I see no problem in keeping this creature. It may well prove a formidable asset in battle, once it’s grown.” Lae’zel comes to Karlach’s aid.

“Ugh! Fine, we can keep it.” Wyll throws his hands up as he stalks away.

“Yes!” Karlach stands triumphantly as you and Shadowheart come up to her, “Look what I have.” She has the biggest proud mama smile plastered on her face as she points at the cub.

“Think Scratch will mind?” You bend to look closer at it, poor thing looks hurt, and half starved. You heal it while Karlach answers you.

“Naw, he won’t mind. Now he’ll have a little playmate to keep him company when we’re away.”

It tests out its freshly healed leg, bounding happily between you, Shadowheart and Karlach. You smile and shake your head over to where Gale is making something to eat. He calls out that food is ready, and everyone gathers to eat. While eating Shadowheart tells everyone of the secret passage you found, but no one is interested in further exploring it with you. Karlach wants to go back to the grove to check on the Tieflings, Wyll want to talk to Halsin about Moonrise, seems his father was taken there and Lae’zel wants to resume her search for her people, looks like they’ve been sighted on the mountain pass giving these Absolute followers problems, she believes it’s because there’s a creche there. You really don’t know what to do next, you still just want the damned worm out of your head. Halsin said Moonrise was his best guess for getting rid of it, and it looks like everyone wants to talk to him more about it, so it’s off to the grove.

The walk there is pleasant enough, the fresh forest smells are a welcome change from the dank, stagnant stench of the temple and camp. Karlach walks with her new pet at the head of the group. Lae’zel flirts with Wyll in the strangest way you’ve ever seen, going on about some how he’d rip one monster apart to kill another…Sounds… messy, but he seems to be enjoying her attentions. And that’s not the only flirting going on, Gale looks to be trying to impress Shadowheart with some magic, she smiles sweetly at him, you think she likes it. And then there’s Astarion walking quietly next to you. You keep stealing sidelong glances at him, and once again every time you look at him, he’s looking back. You want to say something but aren’t really sure what to say, so you say nothing.

No, it’s not that you don’t know, it’s that you can’t say any of the things you want. You want to ask him what he wants from you. Why he wants something from you. You’re only good as a healer and as a snack, what more could you possibly offer him? It’s not like he wanted to fuck you, so why did he? You chew the inside of your mouth until you taste blood…

The grove is bustling with the Tieflings preparing to hit the road again, now that the goblins have been dispatched. Karlach bounds over to the old one and talks animatedly with him. As she’s off doing that Halsin comes over to your group to speak of something important: he will be joining you all. He needs to get to Moonrise Towers as well, he has something important to do there, but there’s two ways of getting there. He suggests the Underdark as it would be safer, there’s some sort of cursed surrounding Moonrise and you could avoid it going this way; but there’s also a way through the mountains, it’s faster but takes you through the curse. Lae’zel insists on that route, as it will bring you closer to her people and to possibly being cleansed, so that way is agreed upon.

As Halsin says he’ll meet at your camp Karlach rushes over giggling about a party. Apparently the Tieflings wish to show their gratitude by throwing a party, at your camp, tonight. She’s already told them to go on and head there. Halsin laughingly suggests enjoying the party and that serious talk and preparations can be made on another day. As he says that Astarion suggests also taking a few days to rest before heading off into the mountains, it’ll be an arduous journey and not everyone is well suited to that kind of traveling. And you’re thankful he brought that up, you might be a dancer, but this would be a different kind of physical exertion; you’d be climbing a mountain while also carrying all of your camp supplies, armor and weapons. Gale very much insists on this bit of respite, so a few days will be spent resting and resupplying.

Your groupgetsback to camp and seesthe tieflings already setting up: there’s tables with food being made, barrels of beer and bottles of wine, children running around chasing Scratch and any number of them just sort of milling about. The camp is quite lively, and you admit you’re excited to have a party, it’s been so long. Maybe it’ll take your mind off everything else. Maybe you’ll put on your sad littledress and let your hair down…

4.

The sun sets as everyone finishes eating the little feast that your guests were able to cobble together. It was nothing compared to the fare at the masques, or even the street vendors of the city, but it was still the best thing you’veeaten since your abduction. Morebarrels of beer are being hacked open and more the bottles of wine uncorked andset upon the tableswhile everyone spreads out to mingle and drink.

You follow Shadowheart to grab a few bottles of wine and then walk over to Karlach to share your drinks. Karlach already stands by with a pint of beer in each hand. She downs one in no more than two gulps and immediately starts on her second. Not to be outdone, you and Shadowheart forgo glasses and chug half a bottle each. It’s sour and of poor quality, but tolerable in this company. The three of you laugh and talk and drink while watching the Tieflings relaxing and having fun in your little camp; Karlach can’t contain her joy at seeing them like this.

You and Shadowheart try to smile sweetly at the random praise sent your way as Karlach giddily chatters with anyone who comes by. You spy Lae’zel following Wyll down to the river and elbow Shadowheart so she can see it too, giggling and wondering what she’s up to. Gale and another wizard dazzle the children, and a few adults, with shimmering displays of magic. Scratch and the owlbear cub bound happily from one group to another, eliciting peals of laughter everywhere they go. Everyone is having fun. Everyone, but Astarion.

He stands aloneby his tent, a bottle of wine held in his hand as he glowers at the revelers. You excuse yourself from your friends so you can walk over to him, the need to torment yourself coming on strong with your increasing drunkenness. The last few sips in your bottle going down before you get to him,

“Not enjoying yourself?” You place the bottle on the table outside his tent with an unintentional thud ashewatches you.

“No, how could I? Praised for being a savior?This is awful.I hate it.” His face cringes as he takes another gulp from the bottle he’s holding, “And this may as well be vinegar. Eugh…” Another cringe and gulp.

“I agree. The wine is atrocious, but I’m still getting drunk enough on it.” You step closer to him.

“So, I see. How Can you stand it?” His eyes look you up and down, studying you closely.

“I dunno…” You smile viciously, “Though… I do wonder… Do you think I’d taste different drunk?”You’re practically leaning into him, lightly dragging your fingers over your neck as you tip your head to one side.

“Well now, there’s only one way to find out,” He sets the bottle down as he begins to lean down, a hand going to your waist, pulling you fully into him, his other hand fiddling with your hair.

“Mm-hmm…” You begin to close your eyes, your dark need for him stirring in anticipation…But something stops you from continuing.You hear… Music.And asoft voice singing, “Music?!” Your eyesfly open, your facelightsup as youturn andpush away from Astarion torush over to the sounds.

The tiefling bard has taken over entertaining from the wizards and she’s playing a soft sweet song that calls to you. You can’t rememberthe last time you got to lose yourself in music orlet your body be moved by the rhythm. Youcan’t hold in your need to dance, so you don’t. You sway and twirl, your hair flaring out around you.You roll your hips, bend and stretch.You’re no longer in the middle of nowhere but back home, dressed in your masquerade gown, mask fixed tightly to your face as you dance for Him. His dark eyes gleaming from behind his mask, watching you. Every denied moment with Him fills your mind. You were going to see Him again. He was finally going to claim you, make you His… You feel the tears start to sting your eyes and your throat grows tight as you’re overwhelmed with want for Him, your harlequin.

The song ends and your body stills, you breath heavily, holding back tears.The sound of clapping snaps you back to reality. You look up at your little audience. Afraid to speak you simply smile and bow, wobbling a little so you canexcuse yourself to rush to the river to be sick. You don’t actually feel the need, you just needed to get away without anyone askingquestions.You wouldn’t have been able to answer them, not now.

You chew your lip as you walka little farther down the bank tohide behind a large rock, the one you hid by to pray. You crouch down and hug your knees to your chest as the tears begin to flow. You just need a few minutes, just a few to collect yourself enough to go back. You don’t want to worry anyone. You try to calm your breathing when you hear footsteps approaching,

“I’m fine!” You call out to whomever is coming, you’re not ready yet, “I just got a little dizzy, ok?”

Whoever it is doesn’t answer you. Youstand and hurriedly wipe your face, hoping to hide the evidence of crying. You go towalk out and see who it is when Astarion appears around the rock, and you freeze. You watch him slowly stalkover to you in silence, a look on his face you can’t quite place.He stops next you, leaning to bring his lips to your ear,

“Here little puss, puss…” His breathy whisper raising the hairs on the back of your neck as his hand wraps around the ribbon you have tied around your waist,pullingyou into him, “You should be careful with this tail of yours,” His smile the same as His…

“...You…” Your eyes focus on his, “…No…You…” Your voice shakes as you hold a hand over his eyes leaving only his voracious smile, realizationfinally dawning on you, “It is you…”

No thoughts, only instinct. You press your lips to his, grasp his shirt and whimper as you’re overcome with need for him. He caresses your cheek and devours your kisses. You pull away to catch your breath and look up at him. How had you not seen it before just now?

“When did you…?” You can’t even find words.

“When did I first suspect or when did I know for certain?” He laughs at your speechless nod, “I first suspected when I caught you snooping around my tent…” You remember that and how it had also made you think of your harlequin, “I don’t think I’d ever heard anyone say the second part of that little idiom, and here I was, hearing it again, from another redheaded elf with frecklesand mismatched eyes…” He brushes a thumb across your lower lip before continuing, “And just now… when I saw you dancing… I knew.”

His lips come back down onto yours as your mind swims. Every time you felt that same pull, it wasn’t that it was someone new making you feel like that, it was Him… It always was and something deep inside yourdarknessknowsit always willbe Him…

“So, little pussy cat… is this my chance to abscond with you?” He breaks the kiss for a moment, his hand releasing the ribbonto slideit around your waist, his other hand tangling into your hair, gripping hard and pulling your head back.

You moan at the sudden stinging of your scalp,

“Gods, it better be.”

His mouth descends onto your neck and bites down. He’s only there a moment before he breaks away to lift your dress up over your head and then steps back to admire you in the moonlight. You don’t let him look for long. You reach out to grab onto his shirt and tug, urging him to help you lift it up over his head, kissing again as he tosses it aside. Moments later and you’ve both discarded every shred of fabric you had on.

He liftsyou up andyou wrap your legs around him. Hebegins to walk you both away from the water to where the riverbank becomes forest, and there he lays you down. His body hovers over yours as you now devour every kiss he gives you, arching your backand holding onto him,tryingand feel more of him on your skin. His kisses drift away from your mouth to your jaw, your neck, down between your breasts, past your navel to where theheatbecomes unbearable.

He lavishes you with his tongue;sliding it up and down, circling your clit, dipping into you, pausing only to viciously bite your inner thighs. Every bite makes you cry out, tangling your fingers in his soft white curls as you writhe beneath him. You feel yourself rising, cresting, ready to fall when he stops, eliciting a whimper from you. You look down to see him smiling up at you, enjoying denying you release as he brings his face back up to yours.

He leans down and kisses youdeeply.The taste of you, your blood: it’s intoxicating. You feel him sliding into you. That same sweet feeling of being filled completely by him making you gasp into his kiss. He movesslowly at first, letting you widen your legs before he begins to move faster. He rolls his hips, driving you mad, one hand finding a nipple to pinch and twist as you moan into him. You bite his lip and tighten around his cock. His turn to moan into you.

He leans upto grip the back of your thighs, opening them up wider, pressing them down to either side of you as he thrusts harder, deeper, his hips slamming into his bite marks. Your back scrapes along the rocks and debris beneath you.Your hands reach up over your head, grasping dirt and hair as you relinquish control to the darkness in you, reveling in all the sweet sensations of pain and pleasure.

Your littledeath comes suddenly, making you tighten rhythmically with every wave,barely able handle the intensity.And heedless of your shaking body,Astarion continues pounding into you, not allowing your climax to end.But you feel him tensing, getting closer, only then does he releasehis grip on your legs,coming back down to kiss you. Your legs now free towrap around him,holdinghim close as he follows you into oblivion.

He breaks away from the kiss to nibble at your ear, lingering in you, breathing in his favorite part of you.You stroke his hair and gently slide a finger up the outer shell of one of his pointy ears, smiling contentedly. He slowly pulls out and lays next to you,breathing deeplybefore pulling you over to him. You settle into the comfortable nook of his shoulder and just breath in the smell of his skin as you close your eyes.You feel thesoothing touch of Her divine grace filling you. And, for the first time in your life, feeling your darkness subside, satiated.

Chapter 7

Chapter Text

1.

You open your eyes to the early light of dawn, cold and alone. Shivering a little, you push yourself up, looking around for Astarion. You spot him a little way off, his back to you as he watches the sun rise. You stay a moment to look at him; admiring him, remembering the feel of him on you, in you and the way he soothed your darkness. You quietly get up and tip toe over to him, sliding your hands around his waist as you rest your lips on the raised skin of scars on his back.

“You rest light…” His body tenses at your unexpected touch.Youhum andnod into him, “I’d have thought you’d be exhausted after last night.”

You smile into his skin and shake your head,

“No. If anything, I could go again, if you wanted to…” Youkiss his back andlet your hands drift down his stomach, your fingertips sliding lower still.

He stops your hands, releasing your hold on him so he canturn to face you,

“A tempting thought, but we should probably get back before everyone starts looking for us.” He brings you into him,kissingyou tenderly, then just holds you close for a few more moments.

“Astarion?” Your hands move up his back resting on the scars lightly. You hadn’t noticed them last night, you’d been too distracted, andnowyour curiosity is piqued.

“Hmm?”

“Can I ask about…?” Your fingertips trace a few of the scars andhe flinches, “Oh! I’m sorry!” You try to pull your arms away from him,“I didn’t mean to… You don’t have to tell me...”

“No, it’s OK…They’re a ‘gift’ from my old master, Cazador.” He squeezes you even closer before taking a half step back, looking down at you, “Another time… I’ll tell you about him and what he did to me.” He cradles your face in both of his hands, “I don’t want him ruining this moment.” His forehead rests on yours as he breaths deeply, then releasesyou to gather your strewn about clothes.

Back at camp you see many of last night’s guests still lying about, some even starting to stir. You spotKarlach and Shadowheart sleeping peacefully on the groundnear Karlach’s tent, Scratch and the owlbear snuggledaround Shadowheart. As you continue towards yourtent you spot Lae’zel angrily storming off away from Wyll,wonderingwhat that’s all about.Last you saw the two of them seemed to be interested in each other…Gale greets you happilyfrom where he sits tending to the fire, his eyes taking in how closely Astarion is following you and he gives a cheeky smirk. You say nothing, only smiling sheepishly.

The rest of the early morning is spent lounging with Astarion in your tent, mostly cuddling. Late morning brings the departure of the Tieflings, everyone thanking them as they leave. As soon as they’re gone there’s an audible sigh of relief as everyone relaxes and looks around at each other’s weary faces. Karlach smiles broadly then exclaims,

“Well then, let’s hurry up and start relaxing!”

“Wonderful idea. I myself am looking forward to sitting back and enjoying a few books one of the Tieflings was generous enough to gift me. Rolan, that’s his name. Is anyone planning on doing something of a similar enterprise?”

“I’m mostly looking forward to taking it easy.” Shadowheart looks over at you and Astarion, her eyes staying on him, “Who knows, maybe we will even get to know each other a little bit better.”

“Haha… Yes. I suppose with that in mind, I think there’s something I should tell all of you.” He shifts a little uncomfortably, everyone’s eyes now on him, “Nothing too terrible. A tiny detail about me… Just something that hasn’t come up naturally. It’s just that I happen to be a vampire.”

There’s a long moment of silence. You look around at everyone’s faces, fearing they’ll be angry, instead Karlach smiles warmly at him and says,

“Aww. Vamps don’t scare me. You’re fine Astarion.”

“So long as he doesn’t develop an appetite for Githyanki I am fine with him staying.” Lae’zel looks Astarion up and down before crossing her arms.

“Fine. As long as he keeps his fangs off our necks.” Wyll shakes his head.

“Well, you’ve all made it this far without me sinking my teeth into any of you. Well… except one of you,” You flush as he gives you a wicked smirk, “But you can trust me. We’re a team.”

Everyone but Shadowheart looks at you knowingly. You shift uncomfortably before Gale breaks the uneasy silence,

“So, we’re traveling with a vampire, are we? Well, if everyone is comfortable with that, and in the spirit of sharing potentially dangerous foibles…” He swings his arms back and forth before finally speaking again, “You see I have something of my own to share with you all… I have absorbed a raw piece of the weave,” He gestures to the mark on his chest, “It is under control, but something has changed recently and now it may, one day soon, cause me to… erupt. And it would be no small thing… I believe it could easily wipe out an area the size of a city…”

He stands stock still as everyone stares in dumbfounded silence. Everyone except Shadowheart. She stands beside him, holding one of his hands… She must have already known about this. Is this why she didn’t say anything about what Astarion is? You look at everyone’s faces; Wyll looks like he can’t take much more catastrophic news, Karlach is just nodding her head, Lae’zel looks like she’s about to explode,

“You thrice damned rotten bastard! You’ve been the greatest threat to our lives all this time?”

“Gale is one of us, and we should stand by his side.” Wyll puts a hand on Lae’zel’s shoulder to stop her from charging Gale.

“You would endanger us all to keep him here?” Her fury turns onto Wyll.

“We are all already in danger from our tadpoles and everything else that has been happening. I see no harm in him staying. Besides, he seems to have this thing under control for now.”

“And should he lose that control?”

“Then I shall leave. I will get as far away from you, from everyone, as I can get. I would go into the Underdark and be done with it. This I swear to all of you.” His hand squeezes Shadowheart’s, “I would not endanger you all needlessly.”

“We’re all risky in our own ways, Lae’zel. We stick together anyway. Right?” Karlach looks to Lae’zel but she stays furiously silent.

“Thank you all.” Gale breathes a sigh of relief.

With that everyone disperses; Karlach goes back to her tent to lay down, Lae’zel stomps off to her tent to grab a sword and then stomps into the forest, Wyll follows her, Gale and Shadowheart smile at you before walking away to his tent leaving you and Astarion standing by the fire. You look up at him and wonder why he was oddly quiet during that discussion. He stands looking into the fire for what feels like forever, you standing beside him, your hand gripped in his before he finally speaks in a hushed voice to you,

“That went surprisingly well… All things considered. But, um… hrmm… I need some time to think.” He kisses the top of your head and strides off to his tent.

As he disappears inside, and you’re left wondering what to do with yourself Shadowheart comes over to you. She’s smiling saying that Gale would also like some time alone to think, so she suggests that maybe a bath in the river, a little laundry and then some laying out in the sun would be a lovely way to spend the day. You could not agree more. You quickly excuse yourself to grab what little you have to wash and head down to the river.

After frolicking in the water and then falling asleep in the warmth of the sun you’re woken by raised voices. You look over to see Shadowheart is no longer lying next to you, but is standing by Lae’zel’s tent, being yelled at by her,

“You carry a Githyanki relic. I will have an explanation, or your head!”

“Walk away. Now. I won’t warn you again.” She leans in menacingly, seemingly unafraid.

“What’s going on here? Why are you two arguing?” Wyll rushes to Lae’zel’s side.

“She carries an heirloom of my people. I must know why!”

“Plunder from some conquered realm more like.”

“Lies!” Lae’zel moves closer to Shadowheart, getting into her face as Wyll puts his arm between them.

“Is that what it is Shadowheart? Some Githyanki artifact?”

“I don’t know. But this thing is what’s keeping all of us safe. The artifact stays with me.”

“You think this can just be settled with words?” She angrily stares at Wyll and his interference.

“Lae’zel, this is ridiculous. You don’t know what that thing is or where it even came from. What would you have us do in order for you to let this go?”

“She is a thief. And this bad blood must be purged. A duel, come first light.”

“You mean I’d get to prove you wrong and thrash you? I love it. See you then, Lae’zel.” Shadowheart then storms off, she doesn’t even look up at you as she passes and disappears into her tent.

Lae’zel ducks into her own tent leaving Wyll to stand silently outside shaking his head. You look over at Shadowheart’s tent and contemplate going to her when Astarion comes out from his, spying you on top of the outcropping by his tent. He asks you to sit with him, so you go down and join him by the fire as Gale cooks dinner. You had slept the whole of the afternoon away and now the sun is setting. Gale calls for dinner, Shadowheart and Lae’zel both stay in their tents forcing Wyll and Gale to bring them each their dinners. Karlach stays with you by the fire as Astarion excuses himself to go hunt for his dinner. Your meal is spent quietly with Karlach, neither of you really seeming to know what to say considering all the drama that has unfolded throughout the day.

You contemplate the day while quickly eating. The whole Gale might explode thing doesn’t really bother you. Maybe it’s because Shadowheart seems to be OK with it, so you don’t really need to worry about it. But what happened with Lae’zel does rankle your mind. Youunderstand Lae’zel being angry, but at this point what is she going to do? Take the thingback to her people and leave everyone to turn into monsters?What purpose would that serve? The idea of becoming one of those monsters utterly terrifies you. Anything but that.

As soon as you finish you excuse yourself from Karlach’s silent company and go to wait for Astarion in his tent. You lay on his bed roll doing some stretches, occupying your mind with the much more pleasant distraction of wonderingwhat it’s going to be like from now on.Now that you found Him, your mysterious harlequin…

As you lay there daydreaming Astarion pushes the tent flap open andseesyou sprawled out, waiting for him,

“Well…That’s a pleasant sight to come in to,” His smiles looking at you hungrily.

“I didn’t think you’d mind,” You give a sultry lookup at him,letting your legs rock back and forth, only a little suggestively.

“And was there anything you wanted my sweet?” He lowers himself down next to you, hovering over you.

“I can think of a couple…” Your body already growing hot, a heady mixture of desire twisting with your dark need for him.

“And what might those things be?” He breaths on your neck and you shiver, grasping onto him, “What could my little treat be thinking of?”

“Bite me?” You beg,and then his mouth is on your neck, piercing your skin, that sweetest of feelings as he obliges you, “Fuck me,” Another whispered plea.

He moves to nestle between your legs,continuingto enjoy your blood, your shivers and stifledmoans. Your bodies move to find each other. His mouth leavingyour neck to come down onyourlips, his hand slides up under your shirtliftingit toteasea nipple. You tug gently at his shirt, wanting him as exposed as you. He leans uptopull itoff before takingyours off, your hands working at his laced pants, exposing him just enough. You gasp and clamp a hand down over your mouth when he pushesinto you, but hishand pulls yoursaway,

“I want to hear you,” He smiles that wolfish grin, his hips rolling, driving you mad.

“But… everyone… will…know…” Every word strained as you try to keep quiet through his thrusts.

You can’t finish your thought:your mindis consumed with him. You want to moan your pleasure as he ravishes you.His pace slows so he can watch you; your eyes half lidded, and unfocused, your lips trembling before you bite down on your lower lip, your breasts rising and falling with every ragged breath, with every thrust. You grip the bedroll beneath you trying to keep from being moved. He chuckles softly as he moves your legs to rest on his shoulders, changing his leverage to thrust relentlessly down into you, extracting an unexpected cry from you. You feel your body rising, ever higher, every time he slams into you. You furiously bite down on your lip, trying to keep yourself on the edge, but you can’t. His whispered command,

“Cum for me.”

Sends you tumbling into your orgasm. Your body pulsing around him as he opens your legs, letting himself down to viciously kiss you as he finds his end in you.

You collapse together, a tangled mess of limbs, panting and sweating and utterly satisfied. You snuggle into your nook,his hand idly drawing circles on your shoulder. You enjoy the quiet moment for as long as you can, your mind drifting, marveling at everything that’s happened leading up to this glorious place. But one dark moment haunts you,

“Um, Astarion?” He makes a soft noise to let you know he’s listening, “I’ve been thinking about,” You don’t exactly know how to bring up the first time he fucked you.Your body tenses, your fingers curl into fists, your nails digging painfully into your palmsas you try to find the right way to ask him, “That time, after the… What I mean is… um.” His hand stops moving, “You know what? Never mind… I’s nothing.” The anxiety twists knots in your stomach as you lose all will to ask.

“Did you mean to ask me about what happened after we killed that Gur?” His voice is low, tense.

“Yes,” You nod, burying your face in him, unsure if you really want to know.

“I didn’t know then… Who you really were. How could you possibly be Her? I thought that if I ignored all the signs… If I convinced myself that you weren’t Her, then I could use you, manipulate you. Should the others ever discover what I was you could help convince them to let me stay. Or worst case, get you to come with me, should I be chased off... You would’ve been my delicious little distraction…” A soft, reticent chuckle vibrates his chest as his hand on your shoulder slides up to your neck, fingers gently caressing your pulse before continuing, “But I couldn’t… I couldn’t ignore how much you reminded me of Her… She was the first person I ever wanted for myself. Not as a beautiful victim for Cazador. Not as some powerful noble I needed to throw myself at for Cazador. No… I desired Her the same way I desired you… I was afraid of wanting you so much. I wasn’t sure what to do… And… I knew you wanted me, too. So, I did what I have always done when someone wants me…” Another sad, soft chuckle, “But then you…” His other hand comes under your chin, forcing you to look up at him, “You knew, didn’t you?” You can’t bring yourself to answer him. You just look sorrowfully into his crimson eyes. “And yet, you let it happen. You didn’t say anything. You just smiled sweetly at me.”

It’s true, you knew he wasn’t with you in that moment; in what should have been a moment of shared passion and pleasure was nothing to him… He felt nothing for you because he feared feeling anything. You let the silence stretch for moment, trying to collect yourself enough to speak,

“I did know… I knew you were using me…” You turn away from his stare, “I didn’t know how else to react… I did want you. You were the only other person to make me feel the same way as Him, but letting myself indulge in that feeling felt like a betrayal... I thought that if you at least wanted me for nothing more than as a distraction… that that would have been enough for me… But then you… changed…” The lump in your throat makes it difficult for words to come out, “You were forcing yourself and I didn’t know what to do… So, I just let you do what you wanted…”

You fear telling him the whole of the truth:that the achecaused byhim using you made you only want him more. Should you tell him about this darkness? How it yearns for your pain? How it’s a never-ending hunger and that for the first time in your life it feels satiated? That it calls out for him? Wanting for him to be the only thing in your life to bring you to your knees?

“I’m sorry…” It’s a soft whisper, barely audible.

“You shouldn’t be… We both did what we know.”

“It was instinctual.”

He brings his face down to yours, kissing you passionately, his fingers tangling into your hair as he pulls you back into him, your bodies finding comfort in the others’ once more before the night is over.

2.

The following morning has a bit of commotion around Gale, Lae’zel and Shadowheart. Wyll is waving his arms at Lae’zel, just about shouting at her. Karlach is hunched over by Gale and Shadowheart listening to Gale intently, nodding at almost every word. Shadowheart rolls her eyes and stalks over to you. Apparently, she and Lae’zel had continued their fight about the artifact, nearly killing each other and, surprisingly, it was Gale that diffused the situation. You smirk imagining it was simply that he spoke at such length that these ladies simply lost interest in their fight and instead wanted him to shush. Shadowheart all but confirms it by reciting something that he said, in her best Gale impression,

“Seeing as how the others areotherwise indisposed at this time, and therefore cannot be prevailed uponto aidin this endeavor,it needs must fall to me to remedy this situation,” She then talks with a hand saying “Blah, blah, blah,” You both laugh, you thinking her soft spot for the unkempt wizardis adorable as she continues to speak, “I do have a favor to ask of you though,”

“Sure. What is it?”

“Come here,” She all but drags you to her tent, “I want you to hold onto this,” She places the artifact in your hand. You look from it to her confused, “I don’t want Lae’zel to find it, should she be foolish enough to go snooping through my things. She may say the matter is settled, but I still don’t trust her when it comes to this. So, just for now, keep it.”

“Of course. Just let me know when you want it back, OK?”

“Hah. If it lets me.” She moves to leave, holding open the tent flap for you.

“Maiden help me, I don’t want to keep the damned thing!” You giggle while trying to sound serious as she accompanies you to your tent to hide it amongst your armor.

The day passes quietly. You mostly sit with Shadowheart, Karlach insists on a little bit of sword practice with you, and then you insist on bathing in the river before settling by the fire to watch Wyll and Gale make dinner. As dusk gives way to night, everyone sits around the fire; eating, drinking, laughing, stories of past glories and embarrassments shared. Scratch and the cub bounding happily from person to person begging for pets and scraps, the rascals getting their fill of both. And as the fire begins to die you and Astarion excuse yourselves to retire to your tent.

You let him settle down first, laying down on your bedroll before draping yourself over him, your arms folded on his chest, your head resting comfortablyas he begins to idly play with your hair,

“I suppose I should tell you about Cazador,” He sighs heavily.

“Probably. I do know of him, but only that he’s one of the elites back home. If he was ever at one of the masquerades, I didn’t know about it.”

“No, he never attended any events outside his own palace. He hadn’t hosted a masque during your short tenure.”

“I see… Rather reclusive then,” Your fingers fiddle with the fabric of Astarion’s shirt, “Is he a vampire?”

“Yes… He’s the one that made me what I am:a vampire spawn,”

“What’s the differencebetweena vampireand a vampire spawn?”

“A true vampire is incredibly powerful, possessed of powers beyond what I have. Speed, strength, the ability to turn into mist, able to call upon creatures of the night and to create spawn…” He pauses a moment, “A vampire’s spawn is their slave. Their puppet. The vampire need only speak, and their spawn are compelled to obey.”

“Then how do you become a true vampire? I had thought it was just being bitten and not dying… But I never really heard anything other than scary stories as a kid.”

“No, to become a true vampire the vampire that turns you into a spawn must then give their blood to you. You see, they must allow it. And why would they do a thing like that? Vampires are greedy, power-hungry monsters. A spawn is bound to obey them while another true vampire would be a competitor.”

“Oh…” Your fingers stop moving, instead curling to grip his shirt, “How did you…” You want to know how and why he was turned, but you also don’t want to ask him about something he’d rather not talk about.

“The night he… made me was a long time ago. Nearly 200 years. I was a magistrate in Baldur’s Gate. And one day, one of my rulingswas, shall we say, ‘disagreed’ with… And so that night, while walking home, I was attacked by a pack of Gur… I was beaten to death’s door. They left me there, bleeding, dying in the street… And that’s when Cazador found me. He offered me a way out…”

“How did he know you were there? It’s not like you’d be the only bleeder in the city. That’s a nightly occurrence, even now.”

“I didn’t think to ask him while I lay there bleeding out. So, who knows? Maybe he was just drawn to the smell of blood.”

“That feels… convenient…”

“Perhaps.How should I know?” He sighs sounding exasperated,“Anything else?”

You think a moment beforea few questionscome to you,but you think it best not to pester him too much tonight, so you stick with the first one that popped into your head,

“You had said he’s your old master, so does that mean he can’tcontrol you anymore?”

“Well, it certainly seems that way, thanks to our little wriggling friends.” He wiggles the strand of hair he’s playing with making you giggle, relaxing a bit, “This little wormhas changed the rules, and I intend on usingitto gain my freedom from him. And who knows… maybe even kill him.”

4.

The final day of recuperation dawns. You wake snugly wrapped in Astarion’s arms, feeling so completely contented. You turn into his chest, breathing deeply, the faint scent of bergamot clinging to his skin. Your antics seem to cause him to stir. He smiles, eyes still closed, his hand tangling into the hair at the nape of your neck, griping you, tipping your head back so that he can taste you. His body moves, pinning you down and you moan into him, wanting so much for him to continue. But there is so very much to do today, and regretfully he pulls away from you to get dressed.

After dressing you venture out and prepare to leave with everyone. The agenda for the day being shopping and resupplying at the grove while collecting Halsin. You wonder if he was able to settle everything there; it seemed a complete disaster such a short time ago. But you worry seems unnecessary for not only is Halsin waiting for your rag tag group but is seated before a large array of supplies; the grove’s parting gifts everyone. Halsin seems to realize the sheer amount of stuff and offers to wild shape into his bear and be used as a pack mule. He’s laughingly told no by everyone as everything it split up and easily enough carried back to camp.

Once back at camp Lae’zel, Wyll and Halsin set toorganizingand splittingthe suppliesamongst everyone;you bemoanjusthow much you’ve been assignedto carry. Obviously Halsin, Karlach and Lae’zel are carrying more than anyone else, but still you and Gale look like you’ll be swallowed up by your enormous packs. He can barely lift his and needs someone to help him get it up onto his back. And you can hardly move with it on you over your chainmail; thinking it will be easier to wear it rather than have it packed away, but now you’re not so sure. Shadowheart and Astarion tease the two of you for being so frail and feeble. You poutand stick out your tongue at them, you’re not some wilting flower,just unaccustomed to walking around carrying so much heavy stuff while also wearing armor. Feeling the need to make someone else feel just as ridiculous youpoint out Astarion’s own reluctance to trekking around the forest not that long ago. The two ofyou go back and forthfor a whileabout who is the most dainty, spoiledcity kid, Shadowheart and Karlach interjecting their own opinions, barely able to keep their laughter contained.

Evening descends all too soon. Everything has been packed up save for the tents and what everyone needs for the morning. The little camp site looks sad and bare, Scratch and the cub snuffling about the barren place. You sit by the fire with Astarion watching Gale once again do the cooking, your offers to help brushed aside as he insists on doing it all himself. Astarion prefers it this way, he wants you by his side so he can play with your hair and talk to Gale. Shadowheart makes her way to you with wine and a smile, a silly grin spreading over your face at the prospect of getting tipsy with her and the boys. She doesn’t even get to sit down before the camp is beset with the unmistakable stench of brimstone.

A spot of black smoke swirls near the fire then dissipates revealing an ostentatiously dressed man standing with an air of superiority about him. Wyll and Karlach are instantly on edge, he angrily stalks over while she runs off to grab her great axe, brandishing it at the stranger as he opens his smiling mouth to speak,

“My my. What manner of place is this? A place of redemption or of damnation? Hard to say, for your journey is just beginning.” He looks at Karlach and continues right on speaking as though she wasn’t ready to strike, Wyll holds his hand in front of her, “Hrm. What would suit the occasion? The words of a lullaby, perhaps? The mouse smiled brightly: it outfoxed the cat! Then down came the claw, and that, love, was that. Haha! They do know how to write them in Cormyr, don’t they? Well met. I am Raphael. Very much at your service.” He opens up his arms and gives a dramatic curt bow as he introduces himself, all of his mannerisms are flamboyant and exaggerated.

“So, are we talking to the cat or the mouse, I wonder?” Gale squints at this stranger with a look of suspicion.

“Neither. The fox, rather, hiding in a word: a silent observer, about to break the silence. Of course, what I have to say merits some privacy, as well as some more… let’s call it refinement. This quaint little scene is decidedly too middle-of-nowhere for my tastes.” Raphael waves his hand and all of you are whisked away to an opulent, but decidedly gaudy hall, “There. Middle-of-somewhere. The House of Hope. Where the tired come to rest and the famished come to feed, lavishly. Go on, partake. Enjoy your supper. After all… it might just be your last.”

You look around at the place, there is indeed a lavishly set table overflowing with sumptuous looking food. It all looks too good, like it’s a trap, but a trap your hungry self is mildly tempted by. Everyone else looks around anxiously, clearly uncomfortable at what’s happening.

“And what makes you say that?” Shadowheart glares at him.

“Call it a ninth sense.” A wicked, knowing smirk twists his lips as flames engulf his body, revealing him to be a winged devil, “What’s better than a devil you don’t know? A devil you do. Am I a friend? Potentially. An adversary? Conceivably. But a savior? That’s for certain.”

“What makes you think we require saving?” Lae’zel bristles at Raphael.

“Come now. Why play hard to get when you’re in deep over your tadpoled head? One skull, two tenants, and no solution in sight. I could fix it all like that.”

His comment about your parasites makes you realize Halsin isn’t among those transported to this ridiculous place.

“You’re mad if you think any of us would make a deal with a devil!” Karlach steps closer to him, ready to swing.

“And what is madness but a denial of reality? Try to cure yourself. Shop around. Beg, borrow, and steal. Exhaust every possibility until none are left. And when hope has whittled down to the very marrow of despair, that’s when you’ll come knocking on my door. Hope. Hahahaha. Such a tease.”

“I will rip out your mocking tongue!” Lae’zel joins Karlach before the devil, both shaking with barely contained rage.

“Ah. The tongue. Yet another piece of pleasurable anatomy you’ll soon have to do without. All those pretty little symptoms, sundering skin, dissolving guts, they haven’t manifested yet, have they? One might say you’re all paragons of luck. I’ll be there when it runs out.”

Astarion’s body tenses next to you, his hand finding yours and squeezing it. This devil and Astarion’s unease reminding you of his scars… They’re written in infernal…

Before you can think to move, the devil, Raphael, gives you all a smug sneer. His fingers snap and then you’re all enveloped with sulfuric smoke; sent back to your camp. Halsin rushes everyone, clearly distraught at everyone’s sudden disappearance. They all rush to speak, shouting over each other, describing what happened. As tempting as it was to have him rid you of the parasite, you know better than to make deals with devils. You need look no further than Wyll and his new horns. Honestly you just want to eat dinner and go back to your tent. You know no one is going to want to sit around drinking and laughing after all that.

Dinner is never finished, so you just rummage through the supplies to find something to tie you over until breakfast and then you slip away to eat alone in your tent. Astarion comes in eventually, looking down at your little upturned face,

“Will that be enough to satisfy you?”

“I’ll be fine for tonight. But come breakfast I’m going to be famished!”

“I’m sure you will be.Do you want to know what we all discussed while you were off eating?” He chuckles softly.

“No. Not really.” You shake your head and pat the bedroll, wanting him to sit down with you, but he remains standing, “Although… I didn’t want to bring this up around everyone, but your scars… Do you know what they say? I know you told me they were Cazador’s doing, but-”

“Why would you need to bring it up around the others?” He cuts you off, hisvoice havinga slight edge to it.

“Not that I wanted to bring it up in front of them, justthat they were all there when that devil, Raphael, showed up. It’s him I wanted to ask.”

“Why would you want to ask a devil about them?” His voice grows sharper.

“Um… Because they’rewords…written in infernal...” He stares at you intensely, waiting for you to continue,“I thought you knew that… I can’t read infernal... Can you?” Youask quietly, a little taken-aback by his change in mood.

“What? No! Why would I?” His face contorts as he paces fora moment, his hand drifting to his back feelingthe raised skin, “Why in the hells is it in infernal?”

“You really didn’t know?”

“No, Talia, I didn’t! How could I? It’s not like I can just look in a mirror now, can I?” He’s furious, and he’s scaring you. He must have seen the fear in your eyes because he quiets his voice, almost muttering to himself, “He said it was a poem… Why write a poem in infernal?”

“I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to -”You can’t make any more words come out of your mouth.

How could you ask him about those damned scars? He hadn’t brought them up since the night of the party. He didn’t want to talk about them then, and he certainly doesn’t want to talk about them now. How could you be so stupid? You berate yourself, tears threatening to fall as you chew the inside of your mouth.

“No, no it’s fine…” He kneels down before you, reachingoutto cup your dejected face in his hands, “I hadn’t told you about them yetbecauseI didn’t want to relive those memories.” He breathes for a moment,releasing you to sit beside you, “Cazador… tortured me... Not just me, but all of us… All of his spawn…My six ‘brothers and sisters’,my ‘family’.He insisted we call ourselves family, the sick bastard…This was only one of the many shared nightmares I have with them.” He sighs, calming himself,his voice no longer tinged with anger,“But you’ve seen them - My scars, I mean. And you saidthey’re written in infernal?You’re certain?”

“Yes…” You turn your body to look him in the eyes,“Astarion, I really am sorry, I didn’t mean to… It was just a random thought that popped in my head. You don’t have to talk about it.” You’ve never seen him like this, not even when you found the monster hunter, such rage and fear…

“No, it’s alright. It was… kind of you to think of that on my behalf. Thank you.” He pulls you into a rough embrace, “Now I am curious as to what it says,” He softly chuckles into the top of your head as he his body begins to relax.

“Maybe Karlach or Gale could read it, but something tells me you don’t want them knowing, huh?” You lean back to look up at him, giggling softly, your own body beginning to relax again as his mood eases.

“That would be preferable my sweet…” He brings his down to yours for a passionate kiss before he moves to your neck, his fangs bared,waitingfor you to lean into him before he bites down. You can feel the tension fully drainingout of him as he drinks you in.

Chapter 8

Chapter Text

1.

The next morning you’re woken by the smell of something delicious wafting through the tent. You reach out, eyes still closed, feeling for Astarion but he isn’t there. You pout to yourself as you get up, get dressed and braid your hair before venturing out towards that delightful aroma. Outside you find Gale and Halsin at the fire making a hearty breakfast. You spot potatoes roasting in the embers, a skillet filled with eggs, sausages, tomatoes and onions all simmering away. Your mouth waters as you drift closer, hoping to filch a bite, but your hand is swatted away by Karlach. You didn’t even notice her crouching next to the food, impatiently waiting for it to be done, insisting she has first served dibs. You decide to hunch down over her, also waiting to be served.

Shadowheart and the fluffy babies soon join you, assumably also drawn in by the smell. You talk with her about the daunting task of having to pack up the rest of everything and then heading out to climb a damn mountain road. She tries to optimistically point out at least it’s a road and not just rocky mountain sides you’ll be hiking up, that doesn’t help much in your mind. Gale insists he will figure out how to make a Bag of Holding so that everything can be easily carried by just one person. You and Shadowheart side eye each other, neither of you believing he’ll be able to pull that off.

Halsin pops his head up and announces that breakfast is ready; you and Karlach immediately hop up holding out plates, vying for the first servings of the amazing looking food. Halsin plops a potato on each of your plates, splits it open and then spoons the simmering skillet contents on top… You can barely stop yourself from drooling as you shovel a too hot bite into your mouth. Everyone starts to settle down with their plates and discuss the morning’s plan. Astarion comes back from the forest just in time to join the conversation. You smile at him between bites, noting he looks like he’s fed well this morning.

Thankfully the final plan for the day is Halsin, having insisted upon it, will be traveling in bear form in order to carry almost everything: he feels bad about how much his grove gave you all. Gale and you sigh in relief at no longer needing to carry quite so much. As the final details are being ironed out you and Karlach drift back to the skillet to see if there’s more… Depressingly there’s none, everything has been served and you’re both turned away to help either clean up or pack up. You quickly move to help with cleaning along with Gale and Shadowheart while Karlach kicks her feet, slowly going to help take down tents.

The entirety of the rest of the day is spent in an arduous half jog pace to make up for the late morning departure. At first you attempt to keep pace with Lae’zel and Karlach: your silly mind thinking that because you’re no longer overloaded you can, but no… They’re much too fast for you. You end up staying by Halsin and the animals, they keep a much more manageable pace. Shadowheart stays at the back with Gale; poor man still looks like he’s barely able to keep up even with a smaller pack. Meanwhile Wyll and Astarion keep trying to see who’s faster between Lae’zel and Karlach; each encouraging or egging the ladies on to go faster. As tiring as it is, you’re having fun.

As dusk begins to descend your traveling party decides to stop for the night. And not a moment too soon, you’re absolutely beat. Seems no one has the energy to unpack and set up tents, so everyone just grabs their bedrolls to put around the fire while Halsin gets to cooking dinner. As soon as you roll out yours you collapse face down into it, you don’t even wait for food. Astarion has to bring your dinner to you, insisting you eat something before going to bed. You groan and roll your eyes before complying. You shovel the delicious roasted root vegetables and skewers of roasted meat into your mouth while looking around at everyone. The day’s journey has affected them all differently; Karlach, Lae’zel, Halsin and Wyll all look like this has just been a leisurely stroll, Shadowheart and Astarion look a little more run down but nothing too bad, meanwhile Gale looks absolutely haggard. As exhausted as you feel you don’t think you look as bad as Gale, maybe you’re more between him and Shadowheart. Astarion gets up from your side, excusing himself to find his own dinner. You wish him good hunting and immediately snuggle down into your bedroll and instantly drift off.

You’re roughly roused, even before the sun has started to rise, by Lae’zel; she’s insisting everyone get up and ready now, that you can all just eat while walking. You try reminding her that not everyone had such a spartan upbringing, but she just makes that annoyed noise at you before moving on to wake the others. You make a mental note not to have your bedroll set up by hers again, lest she picks you to wake first, again. You gently shake Astarion to get him up. Halsin looks sadly at the cold fire pit as he digs out some food suitable for eating on the go. Everyone is grumpy but ready within a few minutes and you venture on.

The road has turned decidedly more mountainous today, making it impossible to keep the same grueling pace as yesterday. The road is littered with long abandoned broken wagons, crates, barrels, trunks, all manner of traveling supplies; why is this all over the place? It’s so odd. Lae’zel starts pointing out evidence of her people near the road, she’s convinced the creche is somewhere close by.

By early afternoon you spot what looks like a large building nestled into the mountain side and point it out to the others; it looks more like ruins than an intact building. As you continue along the path signs start to be posted saying it’s a monastery to Lathander. You wonder why it would be in ruins then, that’s a popular god with many followers from what you remember back home. Lae’zel now thinks that must be the location of the creche, so the group follows the signs leading there.

The sun has started to set by the time you begin to approach the monastery. Lae’zel is at the head of the group, her pace, having quickened after finding the signs leading here, has suddenly slowed until she finally stops,

“Halt…” She holds out her hands, stopping everyone, her voice low, “Wait here… Something is happening.”

She drops her pack and starts to slowly, quietly creep towards the main doors, Astarion following after she signals him to go with her. Everyone else looks around before deciding to move back up the path a bit to where there was a small pilgrims’ offerings altar and bench. You don’t wait long for them to return, their faces drawn and tense. Lae’zel tells of the Gith here capturing and killing Absolute cultists, it wouldn’t be a surprise considering the cult’s use of mind flayer parasites and her people’s abhorrence of the monsters. This cult seems to have the creche on high alert, but something still seems off to her. She suggests approaching in the morning to avoid looking like thieves skulking around in the dark.

Once again camp isn’t set, but this time you’re not even permitted a fire for fear of being spotted by these Gith. Everyone eats a cold meal while Lae’zel goes on about there needing to be guards posted tonight. She also doesn’t want the entire group going tomorrow; something about it raising too many alarms. She can safely assume entrance with a few others, it would look as though she had simply acquired local attendants. She chooses Karlach, Astarion and you to accompany her.Karlach you can see, she used to work as the musclefor some crime lord back in the city, she can stand there and simply appear intimidating. Astarion is sneaky, deadly and can be relied upon to be tactful in questionable situations. What you don’t quite understand is why she chose you.But maybe it’s that;she hates Shadowheart, Gale is a bit too loquacious, Wyll isn’t exactlyreliable when dealing with situations dubious in nature and Halsin is too new, maybe she doesn’t trust him enough yet. Well,if someone needs patching up, you’re there…

2.

Just after first light the four of you approach the front entrance where the body of one of the cultists has been left to rot. You try the large metal doors, but they don’t budge. Lae’zel makes her annoyed noise while you all start to look around for another way in. Your exploration pays off; down the cliff face there’s a ledge with a door that looks like it will take you inside. You climb down easily enough and wait for Astarion to get the door open. You stand looking out over the vista, it’s lovely. You try to focus on this cure Lae’zel promises awaits you all inside when you start to feel uncertainty, not your own but from that stupid artifact Shadowheart told you to hold onto. You’d forgotten it was with you. Why is it reacting now?

“Don’t go in there. They can’t help you. You need to leave this place.” The perfect man’s voice pleadingly echos inside your mind making you grimace.

You look around at the others, none of them look as though they heard him. Ugh! Why’s it only bothering you? Why is it so insistent on you not going inside? You want to be rid of this damned parasite and Lae’zel says that will happen here; so, you push his voice from your head and just ignore him for now. No point in bringing it up and letting Lae’zel know you have the stupid thing on you now. Shadowheart did take it from the Gith, Lae’zel was furious about that, and you don't want to start trouble.

Astarion gets the door open and Lae’zel pushes passed him to get inside first, followed by Karlach and then Astarion, who waits for you to follow him. It’s a roughly hewn tunnel that opens into a small cavern. You hear a sharp cry of surprise then Lae’zels’s voice speaking in her native tongue. A few more steps and you see where Lae’zel stands, speaking with another Gith woman, who looks rather irritated. You don’t understand what they’re saying, but something the other one said makes Lae’zel tense her body. The other Gith then looks back at your group before switching to common so that what she says next will be understood by all of you; she tells you where the Ghustil is and that you are to head straight there, you are being watched, carefully. You look to Lae’zel but she just shakes her head before leading you all deeper into the monastery.

The halls are filled with iron faced, armored Githyanki warriors and younger looking ones, all talking in hushed, strained whispers. Between that and the way Lae’zel has her face set in a fierce scowl you know something is very wrong. You catch up to her,

“Um, Lae’zel, is there something we should be worried about?” You speak softly, anxiety starting to knot your stomach.

“This place is not right…” She slows and stops, going to one side, the others huddling around to hear her, “Nothing is as it should be. I should not have surprised the guards at the back there. Where were the scouts that should have informed them of our approach? We should have been disarmed before entering, I've never seen such undisciplined procedures. And there is an Inquisitor here… Something is very wrong. I am thankful that they did not take our weapons. Stay on your guard.”

“Inquisitor?” Karlach raises her eyebrows but keeps her voice low.

“Yes. They are my queen’s justice, sent to carry out her will. It must be something of dire importance to send one here, to this place. And from how everyone is acting, whatever quest the Inquisitor has been sent on is not going well. But we are here to be cleansed. We must seek out the Ghustil first.” She turns and continues down the corridor towards her salvation.

You enter a room filled with science equipment, practically covering every available surface, a woman hunched over some mechanism, muttering to herself as Lae’zel approaches her. She turns to see who has interrupted her work, squinting at all of you before she speaks,

“Do you have a question or are you just going to stand there gawking?” The Gith woman’s eyes continue to look at everyone but Lae’zel, her gaze making you squirm, she must be the Ghustil.

“I am a Child of Gith, not discarded rat flesh. Am I not due your respect?”

“Perhaps. Perhaps not. Let the istik with you speak, and I will decide what respect you are owed.” Her eyes bore into you.

Why does she want you to speak? Why not focus her attention on Karlach or Astarion? Astarion moves closer to you, almost stepping between you and this Ghustil, but her glare turns onto him as you force yourself to say something,

“I would prefer Lae’zel speak for us, if it’s all the same to you.” You step further behind Astarion, wanting nothing more than to disappear, your anxiety only rising.

“Lae’zel, is it? Fine, and be quick about it. My work is of vital import.” Her steely gaze turns to Lae’zel.

“We carry ghaik tadpoles, and have so for countless days, yet we show no symptoms. We must enter the zaith’isk.” As Lae’zel describes your predicament the Ghustil’s eyes light up.

“You are infected, but showing no signs of cerebral impairment? Fascinating. Either your tadpole is special, or you are. We must find out which.” There’s a strange reverence in her voice, “Go to the zaith’isk. I will ensure you are cured.”

She and Lae’zel approach the strange machine in the back of the room. It’s a horrifying thing of metal, and what looks like flesh, woven through it. It feels hungry.

“At last. My time has come.” Lae’zel smiles up at the disgusting thing.

“Sit, child. Let the zaith’isk end your suffering.” Lae’zel sits, gripping part of the machine, “You must focus on the parasite at all times. The zaith’isk will do the rest.” She turns it on and the thing shifts, beginning to glow, and you feel sick at the words she just spoke… Such vagueries, why did she choose to say end her suffering?

The zaith’isk shudders as the glow intensifies, strange clicking sounds emanating from it as Lae’zel begins to squirm. Sudden pain rips through your mind. It’s her pain, caused by this machine; her mind reaching out to you, sharing it with you. But this agony isn’t something you’d happily partake in, this is something sinister, it’s something meant to kill. Lae’zel shouts out in her language, the Ghustil encouraging her to continue. The pain escalating as her mind begins to rend. How can this be the cure she spoke of? This is no cure. This is death. Astarion sees you doubling over, gripping your hair, your mouth agape in a silent scream as the voice of the guardian commands you to remove her from that thing.

“Aaaaaa! Get her out! Get her out!” This agony is not what your goddess wants. Your mind reaches out, trying to tell Lae’zel to get out, but instead it’s Astarion you feel. And he feels your agony.

“Lae’zel, stop this, now!” Astarion grips your shoulders as you whimper, “Whatever that thing is it’s killing you! Get out!”

Why are you the one the guardian is telling to stop this? Why are you the one Lae’zel’s mind is reaching out to? Why is no one else suffering as you are? Or are they? You can’t see anything for the pain. You sink to your knees, hardly aware of Astarion holding you, of Karlach shouting. But it doesn’t matter, Lae’zel refuses to hear reason and the rending of your minds continues. You hear the guardian again, and then there’s a sudden blinding light as the zaith’isk is blown apart by some unseen force, the pain finally subsiding. You hear Lae’zel shouting at the Ghustil,

“I AM GITHYANKI! I WILL NOT BE GHAIK!”

“My life’s work… gone.” The Ghustil wails in dismay at the smoking ruin, “And yet she lives, and so does her parasite.” This fanatical woman turns an accusing eye on you all, like you did something to that damnable machine.

“How can this be?!” Lae’zel shouts again at the Ghustil, futilely trying to get answers from this maniac.

“I must get my tools… I must…” She trails off, pacing before the wreckage of her machine, her eyes wild, her hands moving erratically, “You will wait here, I must…” The Ghustil hurriedly walks to the door, muttering to herself all the while, the sound of the lock clicking into place echoing in the room.

Astarion holds you, his eyes looking you over,

“Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” You nod and smile weakly, allowing him to help you to your feet.

You look at the others’ distraught faces, thinking of how the guardian didn’t want you coming here in the first place,and for the first time, you fear it was right.This place was a mistake.

“Okay, what the actual fuck was that?!” Karlach angrily gestures to the smoking heap of metal and sinew, at your strained face and then at the locked door.

“I followed protocol. I kept to my faith. Yet the zaith’isk failed! It didn’t cleanse me!”

“I don’t think that’s what that thing was doing, Lae’zel. You were in it; did it feel like it was cleansing you?” You’reaghast.How she could think that it wasdoing anything other than killing her?

“Of course, it was working! You think the process would be easy? Painless?” She marches up to you, looking angrily down at you.

“I don’t know what it’s supposed to fucking look like! Do you?! Have you ever even seen one of those things being used?!” You scream at her, your own anger risingat her childish insistence.

“No, because I didn’t need to. Vlaakith does not abandon Githyanki. Out teachings state-”

“Fuck your teachings,Lae’zel! That thing was going to kill you! And you know it!”

She bites her tongue for a moment, incredulous at what you’re saying, her eyes furiously searching yours,

“Then the zaith’isk was tampered with. There is no other explanation! The Ghustil must have tampered with it!” She spits out her words, turning away from you to pace and grumble to herself.

You throw your hands up in exasperation and turn away, looking to Astarion and Karlach,

“What now?”

“I say we get out of here,” Astarion offers,his eyes still watching you closely,“But I don’t know how we do that.”

“I second that. Let’s get the fuck out.”

“Great, we all want to leave. How?How do we leave? Are you gonna punch a hole in the ceiling and dig us out, Karlach?” You can’t keep the irritated sarcasm from your voice.

“I don’t know… Maybe? I mean, it could work, right?” She gives you a sweet smirk, having taken your outburst well.

“She’s a traitor, and there may be more still! This must be why the Inquisitor’s come.” Lae’zel rejoins the conversation, “We must go to the Inquisitor and inform them of the Ghustil’s sedition. They will correct this situation. I can still be cleansed. This is what we must do.”

“Shit…” You mumble under your breath,is that really the only way out of here? Getting involved with more of these people? You want to just walk out the way you came and never set foot in here again, but you also know Lae’zel isn’t leaving without doing this first,“Fine... But still, how do we do that with out dying?”

“We will fight our way to them if needs be.” Lae’zel makes her way to the door, disregardingthe concernyou clearly stated.

“Fuck it. I’m ready.” Karlach gives her axe a twirl and stands ready to charge.

“I’ll get the door,” Astarion sighs as he goes to pick the lock and swing it open.

You stand back, sword and shield at the ready, grimacing and preparing yourself to heal on the literal run.

The door swings open, catching the people in the other room off guard, giving the warrior women the edge they needed. Both dash into the room, weapons swinging, cleaving the flesh and bones of the unsuspecting Gith. You spot the Ghustil, she was still in the next room, seemingly speaking with one of the warriors. Astarion runs up to her, driving a dagger into her side and ripping it out, eviscerating her. As the man she was with goes to attack Astarion he is struck down by Karlach. You look over to the other side of the room just as Lae’zel pulls her sword from the last warrior, the room falling silent save for the labored breaths of your companions.

You check the three of them over, making sure no one is in dire need of healing, they’re not. You don’t want a repeat of the goblin camp, so you hold off on using your magic. Karlach stands by the closed door leading back out to the corridor, listening intently. No one can be heard approaching. How no one heard all that noise is a miracle, but you’ll take it. You file out of the room calmly, Astarion is the last to leave so he can break the lock on the door; hopefully slowing down anyone accidentally discovering a room full of dead bodies…

You follow behind Lae’zel as she determinedly strides to where the Inquisitor is. She pauses at the ajar door, listening to whatever is happening inside when alarge group of heavily armored Gith file out and pass the rest of you. Lae’zel straightens up and just about bargesinreadyto speak but she’s silenced by the older Gith womanstanding by a desk. Once again Lae’zel is spoken to in her language and you understand none of it. The older woman looks over at the three of you before nodding to Lae’zel and continuing to speak, more heatedly this time. The voice inside the artifact speaking to you again, worried about being taken by these Gith, and this time you want to take its concerns seriously. But still, why does it only speak to you? Why is it not telling the others its concerns? You’re unsure if saying anything would be helpful right now, who knows how Lae’zel would react.

Their conversation ends, the woman walks over to a glowing doorway and opens it, waiting impatiently for your group to walk into the area beyond it. You look at Lae’zel but she just walks straight through followed by Karlach. Astarion stops and once again waits for you to walk through with him, an encouraging smile on his face. The moment you pass the threshold the glowing barrier returns, leaving you with a sinking feeling…

“Hey, does anyone else feel like this is a really bad idea all of a sudden?” Karlach’s voice sounds just a tiny bit shaken.

“Yeah… This whole thing has felt, I don’t know, icky?” You can’t quite find the words to put to this increasingsense of dread. But starting with that machine everything has gone horribly wrong here, and heading to the Inquisitor doesn’t make you feel like it’s getting any better.

“No. Everything will be sorted once we speak with the Inquisitor. They will see that the Ghustil was a traitor, and they will help us to be cleansed.” Lae’zel continues clingingtotheidea that this is all going to work out.

“I agree with Karlach. This is a terrible idea. But we have little choice now.” Astarion sounds frustrated.

The walkway ends at a large set of double doors, Lae’zel stands before them, breathing deeply a few times before pushing them open. There is an imposing looking Gith standing at the bottom of the steps leading down into this chamber. His eyes coldly follow Lae’zel as she walks closer to him. You take a tentative look around and see more armored warriors, this whole place is filled with frighteningly well trained soldiers, all as dangerous as Lae’zel. The imposing one, the one you assume to be the Inquisitor speaks with Lae’zel for but a moment before he speaks in common, addressing the rest of you,

“To business. I suspect you plucked something precious from the ghaik ship. Something that belongs to us. The weapon. Give it to me.” He holds out his hand to you expectantly.

“The artifact. I know you carry it, Talia. Give it to him.”

“I…” How do they know you have it? Had the guardian been talking to the three of them this whole time and no one said anything? Should you give it to the Inquisitor?

The voice pleads otherwise,

“No. Don’t give it to them. The weapon is how I protect you.”

You hesitate a moment, Lae’zel and the Inquisitor growing ever more impatient. You reach into your chainmail and hold it close as the voice inside of it screams at you. But what else are you supposed to do? Deny having it? Fight them? They’d kill you, surely, and then just take it from your corpse. As you hold it out to them a booming voice vibrates the room,

“So, it is found.” A silver contraption on the floor glows, the image of a crowned Gith woman looms over everyone in the room as the other Gith kneel, the Inquisitor and Lae’zel saying something as they go down to their knees, “You are permitted to look upon me. You are invited to kneel.”

“The deathless queen has spoken. You will obey.” Lae’zel glares up at you from where she kneels.

You look up at this ancient looking woman and sense the strangest thing from her, something almost divine… but it’s not… more like an imitation of how your goddess feels to you. It sends a shiver down your spine, but you comply. There is terrible power emanating from this lich queen.

“These attendants you keep, you taught them well. My child. My Lae’zel.” Lae’zel looks upon her queen enraptured as she continues, “You seek purity. I may yet grant it. That weapon you carry, the Astral Prism, it is corrupted. There is someone inside. Their mind is warped, broken, a blight. They are an agent of the Grand Design. Sent to sabotage the Astral Prism, our last defence against the return of the Illithid Empire. As long as they live, the Prism is compromised. Kill them. Do this, and I will cleanse you and your allies. Do this and ascend!”

“Ascension? My Queen. An honor gained, a burden borne. We will do as you command.” She’s utterly breathless at being given a royal decree.

“But… Lae’zel… It’s what’s protecting us-” You keep your voice low as you try to speak, this feels wrong.

“You are being LIED TO! I will be obeyed!” Vlaakith cuts you off with such a fury it trembles the very ground, “Use the planecaster’s power to enter the artifact. Be wary of the creature’s lying tongue. Cut it out, if you must.” She stops looking at you and Lae’zel, her focus moving to the Inquisitor, “W’wargaz. They are not to leave until it is done.”

“As you say, my Queen.” He bows before turning to you, waiting for your compliance.

A soft glow is left after her visage vanishes from over the circular device on the floor. You stare at the thing in your hand, at the thing on the floor and chew the inside of your mouth. Why do these Gith speak with such ambiguity? What does the guardian inside of the artifact have to do with any of this? Why are you even here? You just wanted to get the worm out of your head so you could be done with this mess. What care do you have about… what did she say? The Grand Design? What even is that? You don’t care about any of it.

Astarion’s hand on your shoulder jolts you back from your spiraling thoughts, everyone is waiting for you. You place the artifact in the glow above the planecaster. It bursts open, a blinding, searing light that draws the four of you into it, into a pocket of the Astral Plane, the same place you saw in the dream. You all walk forward but the voice of the guardian echos in your mind, he will only allow you to see him, alone. Lae’zel stares at you, telling you not to fail her queen, to do what must be done. You bite down harder on the inside of your lip, the pain a welcome distraction as you walk forward.

There he stands, the perfectly perfect man in shining armor, a look of pleading sincerity etched on his perfect face. Gods, you hate it here. He opens his perfectly pouted lips and speaks, telling you of how he stole the Astral Prism from Vlaakith, that she’s a liar, she’s deceiving her people, that she doesn’t know how to keep the Illithid Empire from rising again, all sorts of nonsense you have no interest in. And then he kneels down before you, a blade appearing in his hand as he holds it out to you, offering up his life.

It's a pantomime and you know it, but does he know that? You wave him up, you have no intention of killing the one thing keeping you all from transforming, nor do you wish to do what the lich queen wants. Both of these beings using you and your companions as pawns in whatever game they’re playing, you hate them both. Why does he insist on using you as an intermediary? Why not simply speak with all of them? You have no idea what he wants from you. The only useful thing you get from this conversation is that Moonrise is the place to go. This thing may have been right that coming here was a mistake, but you still don't trust him.

You return to your companions. Lae’zel looks at you expectantly, but when you tell her what happened she makes to strike you. Karlach steps between the two of you, stopping her. Astarion pulls you closer to him. Lae’zel continues to shout at you, insisting on you showing her what exactly happened; her mind already prodding yours, so you let her in, let her see everything the guardian said. Her face contorts, denial and anger gripping her voice as she refuses to believe it, persisting that she must speak with her queen.

You leave the Astral Plane, and there the Inquisitor and his minions wait,

“You are named Hshar’lak. Bend your head, for my blade is ready.” Those cold eyes bore into Lae’zel.

“Ch’r’ai, please, summon Vlaakith! There’s much-”

“Irrelevant, ghaik wretch. The queen has spoken, your death is decreed.” His tone gives away everything. There was never a chance of coming back from the Astral Prism and being allowed to leave alive.

Lae’zel lets out a guttural scream before lunging at the Inquisitor.Fueledby rage she sweeps her great sword at his side, catching him in the ribs. Battle eruptsaroundyou.Everyone’s weapons drawn, swinging through the air as you try to run out of the melee. Karlach joins Lae’zel,putting all their focus on the Inquisitor. Astarion all but disappears from sight as you nimbly dodge incoming attacks, narrowly making it out unscathed. You try to supportwith the few bits of attack magic Shadowheart and Gale have been teaching you, but you’re still mostly ineffectual. Instead, you concentrate on healing, the one thing you have confidence in.

The Inquisitor went down rather quickly with the ladies putting all their force on him first, but not without them suffering grievously, it takes so much magic to keep them from bleeding out, to keep them whole. Astarion does a bit better at staying in one piece, but not by much, even he requires your healing. Your reserves are draining but the Gith are falling faster, now that the Inquisitor is dead. Soon after everyone else lays slain, the stone floor slick with blood, filling the air with a metallic petrichor sent.

Lae’zel and Karlach leanheavilyon their weapons as Astarion wearily approaches you. You slump onto the floor, looking over at Lae’zel; shelooks so distraught. Karlach stays with her, listening to herlamentingher life spent in service to a queen who would reward her loyalty with the death of a traitor. You stop listening when Astarion reaches you, a tired smile on his face when he sees you’re unharmed. He makes sure you’re OK before bringing you over to the others. They begin to discuss how to get out of here,

“We must go back the way we came.”

“I don’t know if that’s such a good idea, Lae’zel.” Karlach looks at her with tired eyes.

“What other way would you suggest?” She raises her brows while gesturing at your surroundings.

“How about we look around and see if there’s another way out?” You do not want to even try going out there.

“Doubtful.” Lae’zel gives you an annoyed look.

“So your only suggestion is to fight our way out? Have you seen what’s out there? Or how we’re looking right now?” Astarion thankfully points out what you’re worried about.

“We got lucky last time. The whole place is probably ready to kill us now.” Karlach helps to prove that going out that way is a death sentence.

“And I don’t know how much longer I’ll be able to keep you all healed.” You bring up what is hopefully another good point, "I can't go back that way."

“Fine, we will look around.” Lae’zel acquiesces, reluctantly.

You all start to poke around, Lae’zel going alone into one of the two small rooms that branches off the main chamber. Your eyes look up and around the chamber; it looks to be mostly cave, so there may be some tunnels, hopefully. You, Karlach and Astarion head into the other of the small rooms, scouring the place for anything that looks like it might be a covered over part of the cave. Your exploration pays off. Youfind a hidden passage behind a stone wallandit looks like it goes somewhere that isn’t the way you came. You excitedly run into it, eager to get out, hardly waiting for Karlach to fetch Lae’zel so they can follow you and Astarion.

The tunnel still looks like it’s part of the monastery, with tiled floors and ornate doorways that are trapped. Astarion is able to disarm them, but it makes the going much slower. But eventually the place opens up to a cavernous chamber that looks like a giant machine has been built into it; stone pillars rising from the abyss topped with golden mechanisms and crystals, and concentric golden rings with a glowing mace suspended in the center of them. Everyone looks around for some clue as to what to do next, how to get out, but nothing looks promising.

Karlach, Lae’zel and Astarion huddle together to further discuss going back the way you came… You don’t need to get into that again. You already told them you won’t be of much use soon, you’re not proficient with your little sword yet and you can’t rely on offensive magic if you’re needed for healing. The whole thing feels hopeless. So, you decide to look at the mace, maybe see if that’s got some point to it.

You walk around, look up at the pillars around the chasm, the giant golden rings, it all looks connected to this mace… Your hand reaches out to touch it gently…

“What are you doing?” Astarion’s voice spooks you.

“I wasn’t going to grab!” You yank your hand back, “I just wanted to see if anything happened if I touched it, that’s all.”

“We don’t need your curiosity killing all of us, my dear.”

“Well, I think we need your guys’suicide plan even less. I’m not going back out there.”

“Unbelievable…” He shakes his head then looks over at the others,“Can one of you talk sense to her?”

“What’s that she’s doing?” Karlach walks over to you and peers at the mace.

“What is it she’s planning on doing, exactly?” Lae’zel arches her brows,lookingbetween Astarion and you.

“She’s about to unleash some unspeakable disaster upon us from the looks of it!”

“Do it!” Karlach’s eyes light up as she looks at you, “Couldn’t be any worse than what we were saying.” She gives you a conspiratorial smirk.

“Have you lost all sense Talia? Surely this spells disaster, as Astarion rightly pointed out.”

“Oh, come on! Like fighting our way through all thoseGithwas going to work out any better?” Karlach continues to back you up.

A strange sort of madness grips you as you contemplate fighting your way out versus this tantalizing mystery. Fuck it. Anything is better than their way.

“I’m doing it!” You yank the mace free.

There’s a sudden whoosh of air as the mechanism springs to life. The whirring of gears shifting for the first time in years echos loudly inchamber as everything starts to glow…

You look at each other with rising panic. Your eyes dart around, desperate for a way out, maybe something you all missed before. Nothing. Nothing jumps out at you. As you begin to lose all hope, resigning yourself to dying because of your impulsive curiosity you see it; a shimmering doorway with the outside of the monastery visible. You shout and point, everyone making a mad dash towards it, all of you screaming obscenities as you run.

You’ve never run so hard or fast in all your life. Your feet hardly feel the stone beneath them as you sprint; harder, faster, not knowing or caring where it is you’re running to, you just know that it needs to be away from whatever is happening behind you. You make it out, not stopping to look back, just forward, Lae’zel and Karlach quickly outpacing you. The sound coming from behind you reaches a fever pitch before a moment of eerie silence. A sudden blinding flash and a deafening explosion surges out from the building; the shockwave knocking you all over as the monastery crumbles in on itself.

You try to roll over, but you’re dazed. Your head throbs and you can’t breathe. You panic as you try but you can neither push air out nor suck any in as you claw at the dirt. An eternity passes. You squeeze your eyes, tears beginning to fall, and then suddenly air rushes into your burning lungs. You pant desperately for a few moments, the ringing in your ears starting to subside as you hear Astarion screaming at you,

“WHAT IN THE HELLS WERE YOU THINKING?!” He throws his arms around accentuating every word, “We were right there!”

“We got out, didn’t we?” You grimace a smile,rollingover in the dirt, squinting at the bright sunlight.

“That is not the point!” He glowers down at you.

“Calm down Astarion. She’s right. We got out, didn’t we?”

“No, no, no! Don’t you come to her defense!” He turns his ire on Karlach.

“Well, not to defend such wanton destruction, but it has also solved our problem of being pursued…” Lae’zel points to the ruined building, “It is doubtful that anyone would have survived that.”

“I cannot believe this. You too, Lae’zel? Am I the only one who thinks this was the worst idea?”

“Sorry, sweetie. You’re outnumbered.” You give him a cheeky smile and hold your hand out to himhoping he’ll help you up.He does, sighing heavily, “Thank you.” You step in closeand kiss his cheek, not really caring that the others can see you.

3.

The walk back to camp is short and mostly silent Lae’zel walks behind you and Astarion, Karlach keeping her silent company. Astarion only admonishes you a bit more for being reckless, but looking back he thinks maybe that was the better of the two options. He drapes his arm over your shoulders, keeping you close the rest of the way back.

Halsin, in bear shape, stands guard as you approach. As soon as he sees you, he changes back and rushes down with Wyll. They’re all jumbled questions and concerned looks as you get into camp. The others rush up to you all, obviously concerned after having heard the explosion and then watched the monastery disappear, not knowing what happened to you all. You beg the chance to at least sit before getting into what happened. So, everyone gathers as the four of you relay everything.

Everyone sits in stunned silence for a long time. You hadn’t even realized just how much had happened today. It’s Karlach that breaks the tension bringing up that she is utterly famished and needs food, your own stomach grumbling in agreement, lightens the mood. So, everyone who didn’t almost have a building dropped on them get to setting a proper camp for the first time in several nights.

You relax by the fire as Shadowheart admires the mace, a fine prize for almost dying, you suppose. Lae’zel wandered off, probably needing time to let everything sink in. Karlach lounges with Wyll and the pets while Gale and Halsin cook again. You don’t know what Halsin does, but so far everything he makes smells divine, and you cannot wait to eat whatever it is. You glace about for Astarion, he’s still off on a hunt, so you decide to relax with Shadowheart and share a bottle of wine. You giggle and drink until Halsin says everything is ready.

Dinner is served; a glorious pile of roasted seasoned meat with potatoes that have been mashed with butter and some sliced apples. It’s amazing. Everyone digs inwhile discussing what to do next.

“Well, if I could make a suggestion,” Halsin gently raises his hand, “We can still try for the Underdark. I know it would mean walking all the way back down the mountain. But I do still think it’s the safest route to Moonrise Towers.”

“I would have to agree with Halsin. There is no sense in further endangering ourselves.” Lae’zel’s voice sounds strained, but she’s otherwise her normal self.

“I’d say that sounds like a much more preferable course of action. We can hopefully avoid whatever dangers lurk in the shadow cursed lands that Halsin here has told us of. And,who knows, maybe we will hit a lucky streak and nothing unexpected will happen down there.” Gale, as per usual uses far too many words to simply say he agrees.

“Yes, thank you Gale, that does sound like the best option for now.” Shadowheart gently quiets Gale with a hand to his knee.

You smile at them beingso cute andsweet when you feel Astarion lean into you from behind, huskily whisperingin your ear,

“I’m ready for bed, how about you?”

You nod and stand up with him, excusingyourselves, retiring tohis tent for the night. Hepulls you into him immediately. Fierce kisses leading to shed clothes, his body on yours, biting you, fucking you, making you cry out and beg for more.He indulges in your body as you do his, the worries of the day melting away; the touch of Her blessings as the darkness in you thrumswith contentment once again. It’s addictive, this new sensation of feeling whole.

4.

Camp is broken quickly and increasingly efficiently. Halsin takes on most of the load as everyone else pulls on their packs to head out. The road back is quiet and familiar and so much easier for being all downhill. Scratch and the cub happily run back and forth along the line your traveling group makes. Gale points out that if this pace can be maintained, then perhaps you can reach the toll house at the base of the mountain road by nightfall. The thought of sleeping inside an actual building sounds almost luxurious, you’re almost happy to go double time, if it’ll mean more time spent relaxing. But that isn’t the case with Gale, who gives you a horrified look before you can calm him down, you were only joking… Kind of…

But you reach the toll house before dusk colors the sky and you rush in to find some secluded corner you can claim for you and Astarion. Halsin sets to making dinner as soon as he’s unloaded, the fluffy boys eagerly awaiting their scraps, Karlach now among them. Astarion leaves to get his dinner, Gale and Wyll neatly pile all the supplies, Lae’zel spends her time quietly alone. Shadowheart grabs you to go bathe in the river before drinking and being silly; it’s uncanny how much she reminds you of Ana.

Astarion returns as you’re finishing up eating and beginning to sober up. He shakes his head at your flushed face before pulling you up to where your bedrolls wait for you. There are no shenanigans tonight, you’re too tired, and almost drift off the moment he wraps his arms around you. But something disturbs your rest, a commotion from outside as you see Shadowheart rushing by with the mace she got from you, Gale following close behind as Astarion tells you to be ready. You follow them outside, your short sword and shield hastily grabbed, and out there you see another Gith speaking with Lae’zel.

He’s knelt down at her feet, a sword left on the ground between them as a younger Gith woman stands behind him. They’re speaking in their tongue, but it’s not a long conversation, he rises and smiles at Lae’zel before walking through a portal to who knows where. Lae’zel then turns to all of you, smiling and telling you all what that just was. He isKith’rak Voss, someone she had run into with Wyll and Karlach. He spokewith Lae’zel about the truth of Vlaakith;her tyranny, the lies, the Astral Prism and its inhabitant being the key to freeing their people. You are happy for her, you guess, but these people speak in such vague ambiguities.How is that guardian in any way connected to Githfreedom? Whatever. You’re too tired for this, you return to your bedroll and to Astarion’s arms.

The next day brings a more pleasant Lae’zel and an amazing breakfast, courtesy of Halsin. Everyone quickly packs up and heads out. By midday you reach the goblin camp; the stench somehow worse with all the corpses left to rot in the summer sun. You’d have thought the ogres would have taken more, but it seems this was too much even for their voracious corpulence. Everyone rushes through the courtyard, into the temple and down to the secret passage to get away from the horrendous odor.

Halsin marvels at the deep hole, commenting about how this what he and the adventurers were looking for when they were captured. Funny that Shadowheart found it when two of you were just being nosy. Now the logistics of getting everyone and everything down must be discussed. Everyone will be taking more of the load so that Wyll and Halsin can strap Scratch and the cub to them for the descent. You’re not thrilled with having to carry more weight, but it’s easier than a squirming animal…

The climb is long but thankfully uneventful. You emerge into a stronghold of some kind; dedicated to Selune. You and Shadowheart roll your eyes, of course the ruined temple of hers led to a ruined stronghold. The animals are left leashed to the boys as everyone takes a moment to drop their packs and catch their breaths. Once the place is checked over the pets are loosed, and everyone takes in their surroundings.

Looking around you seeastatue of Selune, a moonstone held aloft, creating a magical protection spell for theportcullis. It’sblockingthe way forward, but it’s been a long enough day that everyone agrees to stay here for the night.At least you think it’s night.No one really knowshow to tell the time of day down here.Lae’zel, having the most experience with timeless space agrees to help keep the rest of you on track.

Camp is set up as quickly as ever. There’s no actual need for tents, as there’s no weather down here in theUnderdark, but everyone seems to appreciate the little bit of privacy they afford, so up they go. Halsin gets to cooking something amazing, no doubt. Shadowheart and Gale sit sweetly together, so you don’t bother them. Lae’zel, Wyll and Karlach are walking the perimeter, ever vigilant. Youwander,pokingaround the dilapidated boxes and old bones, but nothinginteresting catches you eye. Instead, you sit on the top of the battlements and look out into the vastness of thisstrangeplace. Its eerie, a haunting kind of beauty. You look at the soft glow of enormous mushrooms, enjoying their ethereal beauty.

Astarion’s arms wrap around you from behind, bringing you in close to him, his mouth at your ear, speaking softly,

“This isn’t something I’m asking lightly of you, but… I am hungry. And seeing as how we’re staying behind these walls tonight; I have little choice. Either I go hungry, or…”

“You eat me?” You cannot help the ridiculous grin that spreads across your lips, his chuckle tickling you as he shakes his head.

“I’d prefer to not use you as my dinner, but it’ll be just for tonight,” He nips at your ear,“Hopefully.”

“You know I don’t mind.” You lean back into him, enjoying the feeling of his arms around you, “Did you want to have dinner with a view? Or doyou want a more intimate meal alone?” You tilt your head back to kisshis neck.

“Hmm, such choices… How about an aperitif with a view and the main course in our tent?” He kisses your lips and then leans down to gently tease your quickeningpulse.

“Sounds delightful,” You barely get the words out before you feel his fangs sink in and you shudder at the sensation, your mind replaying him having just said ‘our tent’.

Chapter 9

Chapter Text

1.

The next morning Lae’zel stands atop the battlements with Wyll, sharing her spyglass, surveying everything surrounding the fortress. They say the place is like a maze of rising and falling pathways, strange mushrooms of all sorts sprouting up everywhere making it difficult to tell where the branching pathways ultimately lead. Unsure of where to even start, the route is left up to chance. Astarion flips a coin and Karlach calls it; the way you go will be down and to the right.

Whilst that was happening Halsin finishes up cooking and shouts for everyone to come get it. You eat quickly, begging Halsin for an extra serving, you need it after last night, but don’t mention that to him. He happily scoops a little more for you, probably now in the habit of making too much rather than not enough with you and Karlach ravenously scarfing down everything he makes. Once the food is cleared away everyone gets to packing up; there’s less to be carried now so, Halsin no longer needs to go in his wild shape. And since this place is such a mystery it’s decided that the pets will be leashed to Halsin for now, he seems happy to take charge of the furry ones, that big easy smile of his lighting up his face.

With everyone gathered at the portcullis, Gale zaps the moonstone, shattering it and its magical barrier, allowing the group to set off. You follow behind Wyll and Lae’zel as they lead the way winding down the path. The air beyond the ruins is dank and strangely sweet, with strange spores hanging in the air. You look at all the mushrooms as you pass; there’s so many different kinds, Halsin and Gale point out a few, mostly the ones that will kill you, and of course those are the ones that block the way forward. Astarion nudges you, suggesting you practice shooting a bow at these mushrooms, clear them away for everyone. You grumble, you’re terrible with the bow, but this should be easy, it’s not like mushrooms move. It takes you three arrows; the first was way too short, the second too far to the right, the third finally hits. It’s an impressive explosion that spreads to the others around it setting off the rest of the bibberbang and timmask.

As the smoke and spores begin to dissipate there’s a strange looking person seen standing on the other side of the clearing. They are odd looking, humanoid but misshapen… like it’s a fungus that’s sprouted arms and legs. You open your mouth to say something when a voice enters your mind. Not like the annoyance of the guardian or the overbearance of the Absolute, but something altogether new to you, more like a song. You look around and see that everyone seems to be hearing it too, this voice, calling itself Sovereign, says to come to it. Wyll and Gale speak together then ask everyone what they want to do. Since no one knows where you need to go in order to find Moonrise everyone just sort of agrees to go talk to this Sovereign, they might know something, and it’s better than wandering aimlessly down here forever. So, you follow the mushroom man up a stair made of mushrooms and go deeper into the mushroom village.

You slowly follow everyone in. Gale, having suddenly rushed to the front with Halsin, is eagerly talking with him about these people being Myconids. Something they had obviously heard about before, but you don’t remember Ana ever saying anything about them; granted she never spoke much about the Underdark. You don’t really listen to them, you’re too busy looking at all of the different kinds wandering around when you spot somethings that are out of place here; a hobgoblin wearing nice robes and a Dwarven woman minding what you assume to be a shop. You’re tempted to go look but everyone goes up more mushroom stairs and that’s where this Sovereign is. It’s a much larger version of the others walking around the village. It is hunched over a body spreading spores, when it looks up and sees everyone, its voice, its song comes back into everyone’s minds.

The Sovereign asks for help avenging its slain children, there’s been fights between the Myconids and Duergar. The others in your group begin to ask questions and you begin to lose interest, your mind goes back to wondering what that Dwarf is selling. You walk over to the edge of the gigantic fungus you’re standing on and look over in her direction. You can’t tell from up here… Astarion’s hand on your shoulder surprises you.

“Why do you always sneak up on me?”

“Why are you never paying attention to your surroundings?” You stick out your tongue as he chuckles, “Gale and Halsin want to look around for a bit, but we got what we needed.”

“Ooo! Can I go look at the shop I think that Dwarf has?”

“Yes, come on.” He gives you an indulgent smile and takes your hand to help you down the squishy steps.

Seems everyone else will be joining you at the shop, they have little interest in this place. You speak with the woman, seeing what she has; it isn’t much. Instead, she keeps harping on about her missing useless husband who was supposed to bring back some fancy mushroom. You try to be polite and say you and your companions will keep an eye out for him. You’re positive if something down here hasn’t eaten him then he’s been done in by the fungi of this place. She’s not even grateful, telling you not to expect a reward if you do find him. You’ve had enough of this woman; you trudge back over to where the rest are standing about waiting for Gale and Halsin to be done here.

Gale and Halsin finally return and tell of the fascinating way these creatures live; apparently, they’re a hive mind, and they use spores on dead bodies to make more Myconids. Lovely. And there’s a mind flayer down here that’s living freely without too much trouble; he’s here with the hobgoblin, doing research of some sort. Lae’zel instantly wishes to leave if she’s not allowed to kill said mind flayer. You don’t exactly want to kill it, but you do want to get away from it, so everyone heads out, further into the depths.

The path continues to wind up and down as you make your way towards the lake where the Sovereign said to find the Duergar. It seems a long way off to you, but you’re enjoying the strange tree that’s come into view. It's huge, with gnarled roots big enough to be walked on like a road, its leaves glow and shimmer with a gentle blue hue and its flowers… They’re magnificent but they make you feel strange. Gale warns you to stay away, it’s a Sussur Tree, and its flowers drain magic. You’re horrified at the idea of not being able to call upon your magic, so you walk away from the bloom. But it is still a beautiful tree, everyone looks up at it in awe. Halsin suggests that this may be the perfect place to have a small midday meal and a short rest. He pats the little cub; insinuating that maybe your furry babies need the break more than any of you.

Packs are opened and spots under the tree are chosen as everyone sits to enjoy a meal in this serene spot. Well, not Astarion. He sits behind you, fiddling with the end of your braid while the two of you chat. His face, close to yours as you nibble food, his laughter tickling your cheek and neck, your bodies easily leaning into each other; this would be a perfect moment, were it not for everything else.

“Do you think the others would mind if I had a little nibble?” His lips brush against the skin below your ear making you gasp, his body pushing up against you, his legs closing on yours.

“Maybe, if you were biting my neck and I started to-” He cuts you off as you start to squirm.

“Started to what? Hmm?” You just know he has that wolfish grin spread over his lips as he parts them, his fangs pressing lightly into your skin, your dark need for him rising.

“My wrist?” You can barely form words, as you hold it up to him, your desire for him driving you to distraction.

He pulls away from your neck, his hand slowly sliding up your arm to your wrist, turning it so your veins face you. You furrow your brow, wondering what he’s playing at. His eyes lock onto yours. He moves to sit next to you, never breaking eye contact as he tilts his head, opens his mouth over your wrist and lets you watch him bite you. You’ve never watched him do it before. Never seen his fangs press down, your skin resisting before he finally pierces it, the touch of blood that wells up before he closes his lips and sucks on you. Oh, this is so much worse than if he was at your neck. You chew your lip, squeezing your legs tightly together, desperate for the heat building in you to subside. And all the while his fierce gaze takes in every move you make, every sound you stifle as you watch him drinking you.

It only lasts a moment or two, but you know you must look something like the desperate wanton woman you are for him, because his next move is to kiss you quickly and stand up,

“Thank you. That was all I needed.” He looks around briefly, “Do try to get that look off your face before we head out.” That roguish smirk doesn’t help. He knows what he does to you, and he enjoys it.

You try to calm yourself, erasing his bite mark, breathing deeply. This dark need you have for him only seems to grow stronger the longer you’re with him, becoming almost unbearable. There’s a growing need for you to be his; his to command, his to control. You keep breathing slowly, closing your eyes. No, not closing your eyes, your mind only brings up memories of him touching you… No, you focus on the distance and breathe deeply. In and out… But there’s something moving back there… Something big.

Scratch barks, growling, howling at whatever that is, the cub cowering behind him. Astarion is back at your side, bow in hand as everyone stands ready. You hear maniacal laughter coming from above where that creature is lurking. You look to see a Drow man in tattered robes, you point him out to Astarion who draws his bow, but that thing in the distance has started to charge. He looses the arrow as you see a bear racing passed, flanked by Karlach and Lae’zel. Shadowheart runs towards where Astarion was shooting, Gale joins you, and then you hear Wyll shouting. There’s more of those monsters coming from up in the tree.

One of them jumps down beside Gale. He tries to cast some magic, but that thing has knocked one of the flowers down with it, draining you and Gale instantly. You have no choice, you swing your sword at the beast, catching its deformed wing, feeling the crunch of its bones on impact. It screeches something awful as it rears back, running away from you, but now there’s two more jumping down from the branches. You grab Gale and run as Astarion covers you, having tossed away his bow and drawn daggers. You don’t run for long before you can feel your magic returning, which means Gale’s has, too. He fires away at the creatures that have begun to surround Astarion, Wyll rushing in to help, managing to throw the flower away. You’re unable to see who’s hurt, you run into the fray, shield at the ready as Halsin, Lae’zel and Karlach come running to your skirmish. With everyone but Shadowheart close you’re able to cast healing on the whole of your group as the last of the monsters are slain.

And then there’s silence… It’s over. Shadowheart climbs down joining you all, looking no worse for wear. Someone, you don’t know who, starts to laugh, and soon everyone joins in. Karlach, between cackles of laughter, points out that this was a crap way to end a lovely picnic. But with the tension from the surprise battle now gone there’s nothing left to do but finish packing up and continuing on your merry way.

Karlach and Wyll take point as you follow with the others, Gale and Halsin chatting about what manner of fauna those things were. You don’t care what they were, they were horrible, and you hope to never run into their like again. But as you continue walking you think on it more; those creatures were the first bit of wildlife that you’ve spotted so far, and now you worry about what Astarion will eat tonight. You look over at his smiling face as he talks with Wyll. It’s fine. He’ll find something.

The path becomes steeper as it leads you down to an inky black lake, a rotting husk of a village left abandoned on its shore. Scratch stops, a low growl rumbling his chest that makes everyone stop. There must be trouble up ahead. Everyone drops their packs, Halsin hands you the leads for Scratch and the cub before he hurries to catch up to the others as they descend onto the shore. You can hear someone shouting at your companions, venturing a little closer to see if you can tell what’s happening.

There’s a Duergar yelling down at everyone from a wooden walkway above the beach. Astarion steps forward to do the talking, it’s hard to hear but it sounds like he mentions Moonrise… a missing slave… and… boots? He wants you all to look for boots? You can hear Astarion laughing at the idea, angering the Duergar, who then calls for his cronies to attack. Their mistake, everyone had gone down there expecting a fight, so it’s a short one. You watch closely, just in case you’re needed, but it’s over so quickly you’d hardly even call it a fight.

Everyone comes back to where you stand to get their things. Lae’zel mentions it’s close to dinner time, so camp will be set here on the beach. As everyone gets things settled Lae’zel and Wyll mention the boat over at the dilapidated dock. It belonged to the dead Duergar; you’ll be needing it to get where he said the other True Soul is. Looks like you’ll be able to get to Moonrise from there too. Finally, you’ll be one step closer to being rid of this parasite and getting back home.

You sit hunched over chopping vegetables for Halsin, you offered to help him cook tonight, so this is your task while he sits by the fire browning meat for a simple soup. Shadowheart and Gale have been sent to fetch water from the lake and to make sure it’s safe, it is. They sit with you watching dinner being made, patting Scratch and the cub. Astarion waves, saying he’s off to find his dinner. You wish him good hunting, quietly praying he doesn’t run into more of those monsters from earlier. Lae’zel, Karlach and Wyll walk the perimeter, making sure things are safe, quibbling about maybe having a watch tonight since this place is known to other Duergar and they may come looking for their friends.

You call out that dinner is ready, and everyone gathers round the fire. Astarion lounges next to you while you scarf down abowl with a hunk of stale bread. Apparently, he found another creature down here to eat, said it reminded him of a bear, and that he is very full. You notice he seems almost drunk, slurring some words while others are drawn out.It’s cute watching himbanter playfully with Wyll and Karlach.You finish up and offer to help clean while Astarion lays there unhelpfully, Wyll speaking up reminding everyone that watch rounds still need to be chosen.

You get third watch with Gale, and Halsin. Astarion got first with Shadowheart and Karlach. You’re tempted to ask Gale to switch with Astarion but think better of it; you’d be too distracted to actually keep watch. Lae’zel announces that it’s bedtime, as though you were all children that needed tucking in. You roll your eyes before getting a quick kiss goodnight then heading into your shared tent to curl up on your shared bedroll.

2.

Third watch goes by uneventfully. Gale was a delight regaling you with stories of his time with Mystra. Poor Shadowheart though; how’s a mere mortal supposed to compete with a goddess? But he gets tired of hearing his own voice, so you go over to Halsin. He’s already fussing at the fire, readying to make breakfast. Since he’s doing that, you decide to help again, you’ve been enjoying watching the magic up close. You still don’t know his secret, but you don’t care so long as he keeps feeding you.

Camp awakens to the smell of bacon. The large skillet has chunks of bacon with potatoes and onions frying in the grease, they’re served alongside the last of the fresh apples. Everyone digs in and enjoys their breakfast, even though there isn’t enough for you and Karlach to have seconds. Halsin laments that the food is getting low, all that’s left is dried fruit, stale bread and sausages; this may be the last decent meal for a while.

You stand anxiously on the dock staring down into the black fathoms of the lake. Everyone is hurriedly loading everything onto it while you just stand there clutching your pack. Shadowheart nudges you, spooking you back to the flurry of everyone readying to depart,

“You, OK?” She looks into your face, confusion in her eyes.

“Yeah… Just, never been on a boat before.” You try to hide just how nervous you are.

“You’ll be fine.” She smiles confidently.

“You ever been on one?” You squeeze your pack tighter.

“I don’t know. Maybe? Probably.” She nods her head then walks up the gangplank.

“We better be fine. I don’t want to have to swim back if it all goes to shit.” Your lip curls as you look down at the water while walking up behind her.

Wyll takes charge once aboard, he being the only one with some experience back in his teenage years. The boat embarks, moving slowly towards the lights faintly seen on the other side of the lake.

While out on the water you’re approached by another boat, filled with Duergar. They pull up next to yours, questioning why you have their friend’s rig. Astarion handles talking to him, convincing him that you found this boat along with several dead Duergar, must be the friend he’s speaking of. The lie is believed, but he insists on accompanying you all to the fortress, to the other True Soul, for that’s clearly why you’re all down here.

You sail on in almost complete silence, no one really wanting to speak around this stranger, even Scratch and the cub avoid being near him. As the light gets closer you can see that it is an enormous fortress. Shadowheart looks up at everything intensely, pointing out the beautifully carved statues of Shar. This must be a Sharran fortress, or outpost or something. She’s never seen anything this grand dedicated to her dark goddess before. You look up at the passing architecture and statues, taking in the elegance and style of the place; Shar has some opulent, refined taste, and you like it.

The moment the boat docks your group is accosted by an angry Duergar woman. She’s demanding that you pay up for some idiot True Soul called Nere. You’re about to tell her exactly where she can shove it when Shadowheart pushes you right along onto the docks while Astarion once again handles the talking. She pulls you off to the side to wait for everyone else to finish unloading and get some more information. Good. You’re glad someone else will handle all that. As though your first boat ride wasn’t stressful enough, you have to deal with this weird cult nonsense.

Everyone piles up the stuff by where you’re standing and waits with you for Astarion. He’s learned that these Duergar are working with the Absolute cult from Moonrise, there’s a True Soul here, Nere, who has been trapped in a cave in and where he’s trapped is filling with poisonous fumes. The woman who he spoke with wants the money Nere owed her people while their commander wants to rescue him because she’s interested in staying on good terms with the cult. None of you really want to get involved, you just don’t care about some random idiot. Astarion suggests simply leaving him to succumb to his own stupidity while you all move on to Moonrise.

You split up into a few groups. Halsin, Wyll and Karlach go tofind a place to set up camp, the day is already half gone. Astarion and Lae’zel go on to get more information out of as many of these people as possible while you, Shadowheart and Gale go on to explore the fortress ruins. Your little trio turns away from the sounds of pickaxes on stone and heads towards more of the fortress. As you walk you hear one of the Duergar talking about how interesting these ruins are, catching Shadowheart and Gale’s attention. He’s all smiles and pleasantries as he goes into explaining that he’s far more interested in the history of this place than anything else. Gale excitedly invites him to walk with you as you explore, his insights being of great interest to him and Shadowheart, no doubt.

You look over at her as the two men pull away to walk ahead chattering away at each other. She lightly rolls her eyes and smiles, you know she wants to hear more about this place, but clearly Gale wanted to hear about it more. The two of you walk side by side following behind the boys,

“Just look at this place. It’s amazing.”

“I would have to agree. Who knew your goddess had such a penchant for decor?”

“Excuse me?”

“I mean it! I can only imagine how gorgeous it was before it was abandoned.”

“True… Hey, what’s that?” She points to a heap of old bones in armor. She crouches down to get a better look, whispering, “Dark Justiciar armor? Could…?”

“What’s that?”

“Dark Justiciar armor! Oh, how I’ve wanted to be one for as long as I can remember. For as long as I’ve served Shar I’ve wanted to show my devotion by becoming one.”

“Wow! Really? Have you started your training?”

“No. The Mother Superior forbids me…”

“What?! Why?”

“I honestly don’t know… But this is a sign, surely…” She picks up the breastplate, brushing the dust from it, looking at it with such reverence.

As she stands there with it clutched in her hands you suggest she keep it, it might even fit her. She smiles brightly at the idea and tucks it under her arm as you try to catch up to the wayward boys. They’ve moved on to gossiping about a hidden forge somewhere in here, but no one has ever found it… Sounds like the ghost stories you’d tell as a child. But as Shadowheart’s prize is a bit unwieldy to carry you decide to head back to camp.

Your return is marked by the raised voices of the others arguing, save for Halsin, who rushes over to your returning party. He tells of the trouble the argument is about, slaves. Astarion and Lae’zel are unbothered by there being slaves here, but Karlach and Wyll wish to free them. You don’t condone slavery but you’re not about to start trouble over it. Your little trio walks over to put in your two cents; Gale joins Wyll and Karlach in wishing to free them while Shadowheart joins you in suggesting leaving the matter be. This is the Underdark, not Baldur’s Gate, slavery is practiced here, best move on. But your opinions fall on deaf ears.

You walk away to let them figure it all out and just tell you later. You join Halsin and the pets by the fire, letting your fingers digging into fluff and feathers distract you. Halsin talks to you about this crazy adventure so far while you wait for the others to finish their argument. They eventually do and now there’s battle plans. Of course, there’s going to be another fight for you to sit there like a useless lump on a log until someone gets hurt, then you can do the only thing you’re good for…

Instead, you’re going to do the only other thing you’re good for, inciting desire and being distracting. You go into your tent to change while Astarion tells you of the plan, his eyes roaming over your body as he speaks, making you wish you could be doing other things… He has convinced the faction of Duergar who just want to get paid to betray the cult faction; they’ve been promised the loot from their dead companions and claim to whatever treasures they can find in the ruins, but they must free the slaves and your group will lay claim to Nere’s body. When you ask why you’re told that Nere carries a lantern that’s needed to get into Moonrise or something. As for your part in the plan you will play the flirt and distract the cult Duergar, ply them with drinks that Astarion and one of the slaves will poison, should be easy enough.

It is more than easy. Loose flowing hair, a tunic dress left unlaced at the front, rolled up and tied to be even shorter and holding up several steins of foul ale is all it took for them to welcome you to sit with them. You perch on the edge of a table in front of them, letting them catch glimpses as you shift to sit comfortably, lean over to wipe foam from a beard or two, offering to dance should one of them be able to play music or even sing. One of them can sing, shame, she has a lovely voice. You stand atop the table and put on a show as more ale is poured and more Duergar join the festivities.

You’re unsure how long the charade goes on, but soon the revelers begin to get sick, unaware that it is poison souring their bellies. You use the opportunity to slip away to where your camp is set up, joining the others in preparing for battle. You don’t bother with your padded tunic, simply throwing your chainmail over your dress, quickly braiding your wild hair, and grabbing your sword and shield. You needn’t have bothered getting ready; it’s a pathetic fight. Half of the cult group have been laid out by the poison and the other half were too outnumbered to put up much of a fight. You stand there and watch the slaughter, the Duergar who’ve sided with you being particularly brutal to their one-time comrades.

You’re brought injured slaves and fighters to heal up while your companions speak with them. The slaves, Deep Gnomes all of them, are profusely thankful, but lament the loss of those still trapped in the cave in. Karlach wishes to rescue them as well, but it’s unknown whether they even still live. You think they’re all dead by now and that it’d be a waste of effort, but you offer to go take a listen anyway. Who knows, maybe you’ll hear something.

You don’t so much hear anything as your mind is forcefully connected to by Nere, who is, unfortunately, still alive.He tries to command you, a fellow True Soul, to free him. You can see through his eyes; he’s in a hazy green mist, trapped under some of the rubble, surrounded by the tiny bodies of his slaves, his strangled breathing letting you know he’s not long for this plane, his mind now screaming out his demands. You can’t help laughing as you listen to this petulant man, he’s certainly not the one to be ordering you around. Your gaze moves to Astarion as he stands talking with Gale and the Duergar, his eyes catching yours; you smile before announcing Nere’s demise. The remaining slaves mourn their loss before leaving on the boats of the dead Duergar and your companions get to retrieving the body.

3.

You stand there holding a broken ornate lantern while your companions talk around you. You think about how at every turn, just when you have the hope of something working out, it doesn’t. You want to throw the blasted thing back into the poison room and scream, instead you just stare blankly down at it. You feel someone nosing into your hair saying something, it takes you a moment to come back from your brooding,

“I’m sorry, I was miles away. What did you say?”

“We’re going to stay thenight down herethen go up to Moonrise in the morning.We’re not really sure what to expect up there.” He starts to walk towards the camp, waiting for you to follow, “I managed to grab one of the Duergar at the end there and made a meal of him, so I won’t need to hunt tonight. I’m not even sure if there’s anything around here…”

“That was good thinking. It wasn’t one of the ones we poisoned, was it? Don’t need you being sick later.” You nudge him gently.

“Oh, ha-ha. Aren’t you funny?” He wraps an arm around your shoulders, “What do you think made this so special? It looks like an ordinary lantern, if not a little small,” He pokes at the thing still in your hands.

“I don’t know. There’s dust at the bottom…and a strange mechanism, I was hoping Gale might have some clue. Seems like something he’d know more about.”

You stroll into camp, to the amazing smell of the dinner Halsin has already made. He beams at everyone returning, going on about how he was able to replenish your food stocks; it’s mostly different kinds of mushrooms. You settle down to eat while Astarion sits behind you, undoing your braid so he can run his fingers through your hair. Gale joins you, looking over the lantern, saying it looks like pixie dust at the bottom, but otherwise it’s unlikely to work. As Gale goes on about the nature of the lantern Halsin grows quiet, reserved. He doesn’t talk much for the rest of the evening. You wonder if it has to do with why he came with you all.

Lae’zel and Wyll deem camp safe enough to not warrant guard duty tonight, leaving you the whole of the night to be with him. The moment you finish eating Astarion is in your ear, whispering that it’s time you both retired for the night, you move quickly to follow him to your tent. You’re barely in before he grabs you, pulling you down onto him as you smile and giggle, wondering what’s gotten into him,

“Can I help you?”You hold yourself over him, straddling his hips, your loose hair a curtain of crimson falling down one side of your face.

“Why, yes as a matter of fact you can.” He gives you that hungry smile you love, “I may have had a full meal, but now Iamfeeling a bit peckish,” His hand reaches up behind your head and grabs a fistful of hair, pulling you down to him, bringing your neck to his lips, “May I?” He asks, his fangs already piercingyour skin.

“Why bother asking if you’re not even going to wait for an answer?” You bask in the feeling of him sucking onyou, his body rolling you both so he’s over you before he breaks away.

“Because I already know the answer,” He gives the smuggest of smirks.

You rub your thumb over his lips, smearing your blood before he licks it off. You look into his piercing eyes, losing yourself in them for a moment, thinking that maybe you should tell him about the darkness that lurks in you... That maybe he should know… He’s revealed so much to you; his painful past of slavery and torture, his hopes for freedom and his fears of being taken again. He’s been open and honest with you while you’ve kept this secret…

“Astarion, I need to tell you something.” Your voice already sounds on the verge of shaking.

“I’m all pointy ears.”His easy smile only makes this harder.

“Um… The thing is I… There’s something about me that you should know. But I don’t really know how to explain it without sounding crazy,” Your stomach knots in on itself.

“What is it?” He leans up and away so he’s sitting before you.

You sit up and bring your knees in close to you,

“For as long as I can remember there’s been something…different about me. I’ve always been drawn to feeling pain… Andis it’s not just that I’m drawn to it, I enjoy it. I love it, even. Any kind, really… Though I do prefer physical,” You giggle nervously, “And I crave more.Always, more.It’s sort of like there’s this bottomlessvoid, an insatiablenever-endinghunger…” You bow your head into your knees,your loose hair falling over the sides of your face, hiding you.

“I can understand an insatiable hunger,” He smooths your hair behind your ear, giving you a gentle smile, his eyes look at you with concern.

“Heh… Yeah… I guess you would…” You let your eyes stay on his for a moment, “And I’ve learned to manage it. My joining the temple, The Chateau, is what helped me learn how. I was able to use the pleasure I got from my pain as part of my prayers. And every time I would feel Loviatar’s blessing. But something’s happened that’s changed it.” You can't quite tie together in words that the loss of Her blessings in prayer are now bestowed when you’re with him. You want him to know it all from the very beginning, “From the first time I saw you at the masquerade I felt this pull towards you. This void in me no longer wanted my pain, but wanted me to be with you… Something about you…” You look down, unable to hold his gaze, “It yearns for you. And since we’ve been… like this… For the first time in my life, I don’t feel the need to seek out pain. Instead, I… I just need you. I just need you to hurt me. It feels like that dark need in me wants you to... Um…”

It’s not the right words, but the right ones never come to you. The silence stretches on into eternity, you clench your legs closer to you, your nails digging into your skin as you bury your face into your knees. The knot in your stomach threatens to churn into being sick. You’re desperately trying to find a way to tell him that you feel Loviatar’s grace whenever you’re with him, whether he’s hurting you or not. Her blessings are stronger when he does cause you pain, but it’s so much more. It’s like she wants you to be near him, always. You know he has no faith in the gods. In his centuries of torment, they never once answered his prayers. He would beseech every one he could name, and none gave him even a moment of respite or comfort. Your heart breaks for him, you cannot imagine your life without Her blessings. But this is different. You want him to know that this is real, your goddess does answer your prayers,

“I’m sorry, I’m not… I shou-” You don’t finish,he interrupts you.

“Stop.” He holds his hand up silencing you. His brow furrows in concentration. He’s thinking about something but whatever it is he doesn’t say, “I… I need to think…”

He stands up and stalks out into the darkness leaving you alone with your thoughts.

Chapter 10

Chapter Text

1.

The sounds of the camp waking and going through their morning routine drifts into the tent. And yet you’re still curled into a ball on the bedroll you should have shared. You haven’t moved all night.Your fingers are ragged and bloody from viciously picking at them. The inside of your mouth and lower lip areraw and swollen from your ceaseless gnawing. Your throat feels tight and dry from holding in every sound that tried to escape you. You know your eyes are bloodshot and puffy. None of this suffering has appealed to your goddess, Her presence absent… He never did come back. You stay, unmoving until you hear Shadowheart outside calling to you, but you can’t will yourself to answer so she comes in,

“Gods…” She gasps when she sees you on the floor, “Talia, what happened?” Rushingto your side shekneels down, her hand softly glowing over yours as she both heals you and stops your fingers from continuing to dig.

You only turn your head away, your body threatening to cryagain.

“Did something happen with Astarion?”

You nod.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Her voice is soft, tentative, like she’s talking to a wounded animal.

You shake your head.

“Ok… If you’re sure…” She lets her hand rest on yours, offering comfort, but you don’t want her to feel like she has to.

“Yeah… I’m fine.” You force the words out, your voice cracking as you sit up and manage a smile, “I’ll get ready now.Sorry…if Iwas holding everyone up.”

Shadowheart’s eye search yours, it takes everything in you to hold in the tears and convince her you really are OK. The second she's out of your tent you bite down ruthlessly on your lip, drawing blood, focusing on that pain as you roll up everything into a jumbled mess that you then force into your pack. You heal up all visible signs of your torment but continue to chew the inside or your mouth.

You get out of the tent and spot him across the camp, smiling, happily talking with Wyll and Karlach as they take down the other tents. You look away, fearing his eyes finding yours. You hurry over to Halsin to help clean up the mess from breakfast, there’s a little saved for you but the thought of eating anything turns your stomach. You decline, opting for a bit of stale bread instead. Halsin eyes you with concern but you walk away before he can question your lack of appetite.

Camp is packed and everyone is set to go. You hover around Shadowheart and Gale, attempting to not make it obvious you’re avoiding Astarion. And yet the more you try to avoid looking at him the more you want to. You want to know why… why he didn’t come back. Why he didn’t try to say anything to you. It’s like he’s avoiding you, too. You wonder if anyone has noticed.

The walk over to the lift doesn’t take long, but the thing is so small, the whole group won’t fit all at once. Karlach, Wyll, Shadowheart and Gale climb on, you try to slide up next to them, but your hand is grabbed. It’s him. You know it’s him, but you can’t bring yourself to look, you just let him pull you over to the side,

“We should talk…” He’s still holding your limp hand, “I wanted to apologize for last night. You were trying to tell me something… something important and I… I don’t know,” He sighs heavily, “Gods… I don’t know how to… be like this…” He squeezes your hand in his.

You want to ask him what he means but you can’t open your mouth to speak, you can’t even look him in the eye.

“You said something that made me realize... And it’s… I don’t know. But whatever it is, it’s something I’dnever feltbefore seeing you that night.” His other hand holds your chin gently, “I neverdared…” He lifts your face to look up at him, “All I know is I want you.”

A thousand thoughts from last night race through your mind as you let his words sink in. He said he wants you, so does that mean he accepts that dark part of you?That you want him to hurt you?

“I want you, too… I know I’m not explaining it right.I can’t find the right way to say,but I’ve never felt this way about anyone, ever…And there’s a part of me that wants to be with youmore than anything.” You finally squeeze his hand back.

“Really?” He lets out a soft chuckle, “Well, that’s that then.” He brings his forehead down to lean on yours and you just stand quietly together.

This quiet moment is broken by Lae’zel making her loud clicking sound at the two of you, she’s ready to go up to the others, they’re waiting on the two of you. You giggle softly and let Astarion lead you to the lift, your hand still holding tightly onto his.

The lift shudders to a stop, Scratch and the cub snuffle around as you disembark. You look up to see everyone’s eyes watching something happening up the stairs; Gale is talking to an old man in a pointy hat. You nudge Shadowheart,

“Who’s that?” You whisper.

“I think it’s his granddad! Look how cute they are!” Karlach squeaksquietlyas she looks at them, squishing her own cheeks.

“No, Karlach. He said ‘Elminster’, not ‘Hey Grandpa!’” Shadowheartsounds exasperated, she must have already said something: you try to hide your smirk.

“Boo. Why’d you have to ruin it?”She pouts and crosses her arms, “Still say it’s his granddad…” She grumbles under her breath as she kicks her foot.

Shadowheart just rolls her eyes before going to join Gale atop the stairs, everyone else just sort of stands around awkwardly. You hear them talking for a while but can’t quite make out the words. You’re tempted to walk a bit closer and listen in, but Astarion’s grip on your hand stops you from eavesdropping. So, you join the rest of the group in standing about, mindlessly rolling a pebble underfoot.

Gale and Shadowheart return with news: Gale’s condition will no longer be a looming threat, Mystra has granted clemency of sorts. In returnGale istasked with ending The Absolute by unleashing that orb, effectively committing suicide. Everyone stands in stunned silence for a moment before Karlach rages,

“Fucking wizards! You always need someone to tell you to what to do even when it’s obvious. You’re not blowing yourself up, you hear me, Gale? I won’t let you.”

“Surely this isn’t the only option open to us. But it is good to hear you won’t go off at any moment.” Wyll claps a hand onto Gale’s shoulder.

“Thank you, truly. I am not looking forward to this being my end, but it is still an option I will keep open for us. We don’t know what’s in store for us. We do not even know what this Absolute even is yet. And Mystra wouldn’t ask this of me lightly. It must truly be a greater threat than we know.”

It’s a tense moment, everyone continues to talk while you only half listen, watching Shadowheart. Her face remains placid, but you can see her hands are balled up into tight fists before Gale loosens one of them to hold it gently. Her shoulders relax as he walks her to the stairs, everyone following behind, approaching what you all assume to be a corridor that leads to Moonrise Towers. It does not…

You look out into an oppressive blackness that swirls with malice. Halsin takes the moment to step forward and speak,

“These are the shadow cursed lands…” He stands tall, almost imposingly, “This place is dangerous beyond anything I think any of you realize. I had hoped this path led directly to Moonrise, but it appears that it does not.I had truly hoped to avoid this…” He closes his eyes tightly before refocusing on everyone’s aghast faces, “We must venture into the darkness, butfirst we mustprepare. Each of us must carry light. You cannot go into the shadows, they will devour you, transform you into one of them, a twisted unnatural thing. Do not listen to the voices, they are not who they say they are, there is no helping those that have been taken. We must hurry through, thereis no where safe out there.” He reaches into a near by brazier and sets it aflame and waits for everyone to ready themselves.

This place, this darkness hungers… Your grip on Astarion increases as does his on you, the anxiety churning, rising in the pit of your stomach as the realization dawns… What is he going to eat out here? You look up at his face and see it’s etched with fear; he must be thinking the same thing…

2.

You stand with Shadowheart enchanting the weapons of everyone with light magic, save for the mace she carries. Karlach stands at the head of your gathering group, her great axe needing both hands, so no torch. Wyll stands beside her with a torch in one hand and his rapier in the other. Next is Gale carrying a torch, then Halsin with Scratch and the cub leashed tightly to him, torch in hand. You and Shadowheart stand behind him, you carry a torch and sword while her sun mace shines brightly. Astarion and Lae’zel stand in back, both with weapons drawn and Astarion carrying a torch. With everyone prepared you set out into the darkness.

Shadowheart keeps reaching out with her hand, like she’s feeling the darkness, trying to figure something out,

“This shadow curse doesn’t seem so bad to me. It feels… almost familiar.” She smiles while her hand extends fully into the dark.

“Really? It feels awful to me… Creepy… With things lurking in it…” You shudder to think about it.

“Then I must be blessed. Lady Shar is protecting me from this darkness.”

“Think she’d toss some of that protection my way?” You lean into her, pleadingly.

“I don’t think it works like that.” She does that self satisfied head shake as she gives you a cheeky smirk.

“Oh well… Worth a shot.” You lament dramatically before straightening back up and continuing to follow the others deeper.

There are whispers carried on the air as you walk, beckoning to you. Even the ground has been warped by the foul curse permeating the whole of this place. Scratch growls often, Halsin has had to carry the cub because he was shaking with fear, unable to move. It feels as though you’ve been walking forever, just as in the Underdark, there’s no way to tell if it’s night or day. But then there’s light and voices coming from farther down the road. They don’t sound like the ominous murmurs coming from the darkness, but like people also traveling through this nightmare. Around another bend and you see their torches, the one at the front calls out,

“Who goes there?” Her voice sounds shaken.

Karlach and Wyll continue on into view, Wyll responding,

“We’re no threat. We’re seeking safe passage through the curse.”

“All of you, come into the light.” She lifts her torch higher to see all of you.

She watches the rest of you gather close behind Wyll and Karlach as she motions for her group to come closer, all of you gathering together in a small clearing. The strangers hold up their torches and weapons, eyeing you suspiciously. Everyone takes in the measure of the other, silently deciding what to do next when one of them begins backing away, closer to the shadows. The one that had called out to you first shouts for him to come back into the light, but he does not listen.

There’s a shrieking cry as one of the shades reaches out and snatches their wayward comrade, his own cries going silent as soon as he’s gone from sight. Your companions encircle you and Halsin, holding up their torches, brandishing their weapons, ready to fight. The strangers shouting for their friend, desperate to save him, but it is too late. His voice answers them, telling them he can’t see their torches, that he can’t see anything. His twisted body looms out of the dark, strange green glowing cracks and swirling black dust covering his body as he comes for them.

More monstrosities lunge out from the darkness. Everyone sticks close as they lash out with their weapons, the shadow creatures screeching as they’re struck with the enchanted weapons, the light rending the shadows almost instantly, but the changed bodies of their victims require more. You keep your eye on everyone, healing any wound you see, even on the strangers, fearful of anyone being unable to run should you need to flee. But with so many fighting the whole thing doesn’t last long.

“Thank you…” The woman breathes heavily, “We wouldn’t have made it without your help. We need to get out of here. There’s a safe place, follow me.”

“There is someplace in here that’s not touched by the curse?” Halsin steps forward when he hears her, shaking his head as in disbelief.

“Yes. Protected by magic. It’s the only place in here that’s safe. Your torches work here on the outskirts, but any further in and you’re screwed. Come on, let’s get moving.”

“We should follow. We do not yet know how to get to Moonrise, and this may be our only hope of surviving out here. If nothing else, we could perhaps resupply and be given some direction.”

Everyone agrees with Halsin and falls back in line to follow these people back to their safe haven. You give Astarion a quick smile but he only nods at you to get in line and follow. The path continues on, turning sharply downhill giving you your first glimpse of the softly glowing dome. As you approach it you can feel a sense of divine magic emanating from it, Shadowheart shivers as you pass through its light. You open your mouth to ask her if her hand is bothering her again when your legs are gripped by twisting vines creeping up your legs, rooting you, everyone to the spot. An older Elven woman walks forward, her hands glowing with druidic magic.

“What is the meaning of this?” You can hear Lae’zel behind you, angrily shouting at this unprovoked attack.

“Jaheira, wait. These people are with us. They helped us fight back the shadows.” The woman at the front of your group pleads.

“That may be so, but we do not know them, and we must be sure…” You can’t really see her passed everyone else, “It seems I was right to be suspicious of you. You’re part of them. You’re all Absolutists. You should not have come here True Souls.”

“No, we’re not! We can explain!” Wyll holds his hands up.

As everyone clamors to explain you struggle against the vines, furious at being held like this. You’ve done nothing wrong; you don’t know what she’s on about, you just want to get through this cursed place, reach Moonrise and get the worm out of your head. You begin to rip at the vines when she releases her magic, and they vanish. Shadowheart comes up to you, pulling you over to where Jaheira stands holding a bottle with one of those parasites in it.

“Show her.” She nods her head over to the older Elf.

“Show her what?”

“The Astral Prism.”

“You sure?” First, she wants you to keep it hidden and now she wants to show this stranger?

“Yes.”

You reach into your chainmail and hold it out for them to see. The worm in the bottle begins to writhe and thrash against the glass and then pops. Jaheira stares down at the dead worm,

“What in the hells is that thing?”

“A Githyanki relic, it holds someone inside with the power to stop the parasites from controlling us, from changing us.” Shadowheart continues to look down at the thing in your hands but makes no move to reclaim it from you.

“Congratulations, you’ve earned yourself the benefit of the doubt.” She relaxes her stance, signaling for the people to stand down, “At ease Harpers. I’ll not pretend to understand what that thing is, but I’m old and wise enough to recognize a sliver of hope when it crawls out of the dark. Tell me, why have you come here?”

“To get rid of this thing,” You mumble under your breath as you stow the prism again. Guess you’re still going to be the one stuck holding on to it.

“There are many reasons we have come here. But that is the reason that united us in the first place. Perhaps we can speak further, inside, and not just standing around on a bridge.” Wyll smiles and walks up to her.

“Yes of course. There’s food and places to rest in the inn. Settle in, then come join me for a drink? You just may be the godsend we’re looking for.” She smiles, but something about it rubs you the wrong way and then she turns and strides into the inn.

Karlach comes bounding up behind you as Jaheira walks away,

“Oh, my gods! That’s Jaheira! The Jaheira!”

“Yeah… I know.”

“She’s a legend! Why aren’t you excited?”

“Because she attacked us?”

“She didn’t attack us… She was just being cautious. Yeah.” She keeps nodding and smiling like a giddy kid before she heads towards the inn.

You wait as everyone files passed then you slowly follow after them. Once inside you see Wyll and Lae’zel have already started talking to Jaheira. She proffers a cup of wine, you take it and begin to sip it, but you stop, there’s a strange smell to it; Klauthgrass, an herb said to elicit the truth. You place the cup down without drinking it and shake your head at Astarion before he drinks from his. Jaheira either doesn’t notice or doesn’t care that you two don’t drink, all the others have already started to enjoy theirs.

You stand there as they all talk. Jaheira goes on about the cult of the Absolute being in Baldur’s Gate, she chased members here only to find a dead man risen from his grave, and now is invincible, General Ketheric Thorm. A onetime Sharran that was defeated by her and other druids over a century ago. And now he’s leading an army for the cult. She implores your companions to help her, and her Harpers take down the general.

You’re reaching your limit of listening to this never-ending conversation; you have nothing to offer, and you just want someone to tell you what you need to do next. You walk away as your companions continue speaking with the woman who drugs people. You sit on a stool and swing your legs, watching a hairless cat sniff around Scratch and the cub before it hisses and prances away. The Tieflings from the grove seem to be here too, but not as many as you remember. Your stomach grumbles, reminding you not just of your own hunger, but of Astarion. He hasn’t said anything yet, but you also haven’t had a chance to talk about it. You chew the inside of your mouth and stare out the open door. Your companions finish talking and start moving outside, gathering by the fountain, you hop down and go out to them.

There’s a plan. You’ll be splitting up into two groups; Halsin along with Gale, Wyll and Karlach will start doing something to find the forest spirit Halsin is here to rescue, and Lae’zel, Shadowheart, Astarion and you will be helping the Harpers in their search to find how the cultists move through the cursed lands. There’s a Selune cleric here at the inn that will be called upon tomorrow to give you all protection against the lighter parts of the curse. Shadowheart sneers but says nothing about it. And since the day is already mostly gone, the plan will be carried out tomorrow.

With that sorted everyone disperses around this little safe haven. Wyll and Gale go off to find out where you can all sleep. Halsin and Karlach head to the barn, that’s also a forge, to settle the animals down and talk to the blacksmith. Shadowheart and Lae’zel go to speak with the Harpers about tomorrow. You watch them go; a bit surprised to see the two of them do something together without the threat of violence. And that leaves you and Astarion alone at the fountain, waiting to see who will bring up the elephant in the room…

“So… Got any dinner plans?” You try to keep the question lighthearted.

“About that…” He just trails off.

“Might I suggest me?” You smile at him, your hand resting on his hip.

“As delicious as you are, I don’t know…” He gives you a weak smile.

“You didn’t seem to mind that night we got to the Underdark, and you couldn’t go for a hunt.” You step in closer, your other hand fiddling with the front of his leather armor.

“Yes, but that was different.” His hand reaches up to hold yours on his chest.

“How?”

“It was just for one night.”

“I can handle it.” You give him the sweetest of smiles as he closes his eyes and squeezes your hand tighter, “What? Don’t you think I can?”

“For tonight yes, but what about tomorrow? Or the day after that? Or for however many days we’re stuck in this gods forsaken place? That’s so much…” His voice is strained, you can see him clenching his jaw.

“I’ll just eat more. I’ll be fine. Promise.” You lean up and kiss him softly, covering your own anxiety about it. Your healing magic can close a wound, but it can’t replace lost blood…

3.

Dinner that night is hearty but plain. It’s shared fare with the Tieflings and Harpers; a large pot of meaty gruel made by their cook. The smell of it is a bit anemic; like there’s not much meat actually in it, just mostly potatoes and flour to thicken it. The bread is rock hard and only fit for consumption after soaking up the gruel. All in all, it takes a lot for you to polish off two big bowls before you excuse yourself to go to where you’ll be sleeping.

The Harpers gave your group the upstairs to set up your bedrolls, as there’s no extra beds available. You’re close to the room the Selune cleric is staying in. She hasn’t left it, so you leave it alone for now, you’ll have to bother her tomorrow anyway. You spot Astarion on the balcony looking out over the water. You tiptoe up behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist, burying your face in his back. His chest rumbles as he speaks,

“All done with your dinner?”

“Yup. Two big bowls and half a loaf of bread, as per your instructions. I’m fit to burst at this point. That was so much food.”

“Well, we need to make sure you’ll be recovered by tomorrow, now, don’t we?” His hands release your hold on him as he turns to you, “Shall we?” He leads you away to a corner where he’s set up your bedrolls together.

He gets under the cover with you, settling between your legs, nuzzling into your neck, breathing you in before biting down and feeding. He takes long, deep draws. You can hear him swallowing, his breath quickening, his grip tightening, more of his weight bearing down. You gasp, trying not to make noise, your dark need calling out for more as you start getting lightheaded. He told you to stop him before you feel like passing out, but you’re enjoying the sensation so much that you let it go further than you should. You’re close to drifting away when you finally tug on his shirt: the signal for him to stop. His mouth releases you but he lingers, his tongue lapping at his punctures as you softly moan. You want more, but all he does is help bring your hand to your neck so you can close his mark. He smooths your hair before moving behind you, holding you close as you drift off wrapped in his arms.

The next morning you’re woken early by Lae’zel,she says something aboutthe Harpers wantingto get an early start of it to set up their ambush. You groan, saying you heard her so she will leave. You sit up, but too quickly, your head swims, you squeeze your eyes shut a moment and then slowly open them only to see Astarion’s face in front of yours.

“It was too much, wasn’t it?”He squints his eyes.

“What? No, I’m just-” You yawn exaggeratedly before planting a peck on his lips, “I’m just tired. I didn’t know we’d be getting up soearly, that’s all. Please,don’t worry.” You smile innocently before giving him a gentle push so you can get up and get ready.

“You will tell me, won’t you? If it’s too much for you?” He doesn’t seem to fully buy the tired act.

“Of course. I promise.” You lie through your smile.

Youbraid your hair,put on your chainmail and a half-breast plate the Harpers had given you while Astariongoes to get you breakfast. Everyone else seems to be in various stages of readiness, Shadowheart comes over to you to pull your braid out of your armor, giggling softly at you for getting it stuck in the first place. She sits with you as Astarion returnswitha hunk of bread and two large bowls of last night’s gruel. He sets all the food in front of you, sitting himself down on the other side of you, waiting for you to get started. Shadowheart looks at the amount he’s brought,

“You really going to eat all of that?” Her eyes widen and her mouth hangs slightly agape.

“Yup!” You smile brightly with forced enthusiasm.

“You better.” He whispers so only you can hear him, his brows arched and his eyes serious, your cheeks flush slightly.

You stick your tongue out at him, just a little bit, before digging in. Shadowheart shakes her head and heads down to get her own breakfast. You eat as fast as you can, hoping you’ll digest enough to be able to walk soon. Satisfied with you finishing it all, Astarion lets you lean on him until everyone else begins gathering in front of the Selunite’s room, ready to start the day.

Jaheira stands before the door and knocks, the voice inside inviting everyone in. There’s a white-haired woman standing on a balcony at the far end of the room, her back to the door. Her arms move in slow arcs, soft glowing magic flowing from her to the barrier that surrounds the inn. She stills her arms, bowing her head in prayer before turning to face everyone, slowly walking inside. Her eyes scanning over your faces, lingering on you and then Shadowheart.

“Are these the True Souls you believe will save us all?” She cocks her head to the side and pursing her lips.

“Yes. They have agreed to help us.” Jaheira smiles at her.

“Well, bully for us. And let me guess, they need my protection now too?”

“If you would be so kind.”

The Selune cleric casts her moon magic on you all, the feeling odd but not unpleasant on you, but you hear Shadowheart hiss in pain, shaking out her hand before mumbling under her breath,

“Selunite magic. Dark Lady forgive me.”

“Good nose. Like a nasty terrier.” The cleric glowers at Shadowheart, curling her lip in obvious disgust.

You move next to Shadowheart and return the moon witch’s glare. Who does she think she is, looking down her nose at you? She’s just as bad as the one’s back home, they’re all the same. The cleric turns her head, about to walk away when she stops, her brow furrowing as she looks to Jaheira,

“Do you hear that? Something's wrong.”

There’s a sudden crash as a man with rotting bony angel wings lands on the balcony. He stands, his eyes focusing on the cleric as he strides into the room,

“Hello, Isobel.” His lips spread in a menacing grin.

“Marcus? What’s happened to you?” She backs away, closer to you and Shadowheart.

“I’ve been blessed. You can be too, if you come with me to General Thorm.” He holds a hand out to her, waiting for her to go to him.

“What is the meaning of this Marcus?” Jaheira hunches, her fingers poised by her scimitars.

He ignores Jaheira, his mind reaching out and connecting to all of you with parasites, commanding you to help him take Isobel back to Moonrise. Karlach’s hyena cackle breaks the man’s connection,

“Hahahaha! Get the fuck out with that crazy talk!” She pulls her great axe free and shakes out her shoulders, ready to fight.

“The Absolute sees all, your treachery will be punished!” He then leans back and bellows out a horrific howl that is answered by the screeches of winged monsters descending upon the inn.

Screams erupt from everywhere in the inn and outside. Marcus charges at Isobel as monsters swarm inside the crowded room. You find yourself grabbing Isobel and shoving her behind you, your shield raised against an onslaught of blows from the winged man. You bear no love for this woman, but she’s the only one capable of maintaining the barrier, if she goes everyone will die. Her protection takes priority.

With so many bodies in the room it’s hard to maneuver, it’s all you can do to keep your shield up and your body between Marcus and Isobel. Your arm screams and you use the pain to pray to your Maiden, her blessings giving you strength as you continue to hold. You can’t even manage to pull your sword or cast magic, his blows keep raining down upon you, never giving you a moment to heal your friends. Even with Her bolstering you, you know you can’t hold out forever. And that’s when Karlach makes her way to you and absolutely wreaks the winged man. She rips one of his wings off, beating him with it, bludgeoning his skull. It’s only when he drops that you see her great axe is buried in one of the monsters, she’s using anything she can get her hands on to attack. She turns, looking for more, but there are no more.

While you had been focused on Marcus the others were able to kill the rest of the winged freaks. The frenzy from just a moment ago subsides. You look over at everyone, worried because you couldn’t help them during the fight, only to see none are injured… But how could that be? Surely someone would have been hurt by those things… You turn to see Isobel breathing heavily and realize, she kept them all safe while you were just standing in front of her. You bite down on the inside of your lip and squeeze your swollen arm from your badly dented shield. Only when you can’t move your fingers do you realize that your bones are broken, you set them to rights while walking towards the door. The room is full to capacity with more Harpers rushing in every moment, all of them clamoring to know what just happened and you just want to leave.

You sit on your bedroll watching the Harpers drag bodies from Isobel’s room. You don’t know how long the others stay in there to talk, but eventually they emerge. You stand and wait for one of them to tell you what’s happening. It’s Astarion that walks over, informing you that the ambush will be postponed while the Harpers investigate what happened; apparently Marcus was one of them, a Flaming Fist that turned traitor. You’re relieved to be done for the day and get to removing your armor and undoing your hair. You’ve noticed that he likes it down, always fiddling with it, so you try to indulge him whenever you can. No sooner than it is loosed does he slip his hand through it, twirling the ends around his finger. Youlet yourself smile whilelookingout over the first floor when you spot him.Raphael,standing therein all his pompous glory, hissaccharine false smile plastered on his face.

“Were you here this whole time?” You certainly don’t remember anyone saying they spotted him this morning, nor do you recall any infernal help in that battle just now.

“Well, yes and no.” That smile widens, “I was here seeing about some business before being ever so rudely interrupted, as I’m sure you were too. I do have other potential clients aside from your fine selves.” His gazetravelsaround the room, devouring every person he lays eyes on, the final person being Astarion.

“Well, then I guess we best let you get back to business.” You don’t know why he’s here now, but you don’t like the way he’s looking at Astarion, so you grab his hand and try to walk away but he doesn’t move.

“You may not want to avail yourself of my services right now, but it appears our friend here does,” He waves a hand at Astarion.

“I have a proposal for you,” His voice shakes ever so slightly.

“Ha! If you’re hoping to taste my blood little vampling, then think again. It burns hotter than Wyvern Whiskey,” Raphael may have said it like a warning, but his lecherous smile makes you think he’d actually think about it, and the thought of Astarion biting anyone else makes you ache.

“I’m being serious, devil.” He breathes deeply to steady himself, his hand griping yours, “A long time ago Cazador carved some infernal runes into my back. I’d like you to tell me what they are, what they say.”

“Are you sure about this?” You whisper, worrying about what sort of deal the devil would ask for from him.

“Please, I need to know. Trust me.” He looks down at you with imploring eyesand all you can do is nod silently.

“Hmm… Now this is an interesting proposal. And believe me, I am motivated to help you. Scars often have such wonderful stories. I think yours, Astarion, might be truly exquisite.” Again, he leers at him, his eyes traveling up and down, “I’ll… see you soon.” And with that he vanishes in a puff of black sulfurous smoke.

With the devil gone Astarion walks you over to the bar to sit and wait, a glass of wine for each of you sits untouched as you both sit and think quietly to yourselves. You’re worried about him; you want him to find out about his scars, but you fear him making a deal with one devil to rid himself of another. But he said to trust him, and you do, it’s just not something you want to think about now. Everything just keeps getting more complicated. You steal sidelong glances at him, he’s lost in his own thoughts, his fingers idly titling the glass one way then the other, he doesn’t even play with your hair.

Gale finds you and lets you know what’s happening with Halsin’s quest. You only half listen, he said something about there being an enchanted man and they need to find something. Astarion nods and you wish them luck, watching them head out. Jaheira then comes to inform you that the ambush is resuming and to get ready to leave now. You groan, having already taken everything off but now you need to put it all back on again. By the time you’re done everyone is waiting for you at the bridge.

The group of Harpers lead you into the cursed village, down a mangled road to a half-collapsed house where you all hide in the dark to wait for something to happen. You sit there for an eternity; you no longer know what to focus your eyes on, all you see is shadows, your legs are starting to cramp, and you want to stand up and stretch, but the moment you start to move Lae’zel shoots you death glare. So, you stay put, your feet going all pins and needles when voices can start to be heard and the soft white glow of a lantern steadily moves closer.

A truly frightening spider thing comes crawling down the path. It has the bulbous hairy body of a spider and the torso of a man with too many eyes sprouting from the top, a sword in one hand and lantern held aloft in the other. There’s a few goblins and a half-orc following it, it’s muttering something you can’t make out, its voice is so soft. You strain your ears, trying to make it out whenone of the goblins makes to move out of the circle of light, and before she gets two stepsthecreature lunges at her,hacking at her with its sword,all while screaming about not feeding the shadows. It’s horrific. The thing hovers over her body, continuing to murmur, apologizing to its god, to the Absolute.

You flinch as one of the Harpers calls for the attack. Everyone, but you, springs into action, it takes you a second to get your legs to cooperate, and that’s when you see that monster leap up to the house. You manage to scramble away in time, but the Harper behind you takes one of those spindly legs to chest. The creature looks around for more attackers before scurrying away, causing more carnage. You rush to the Harper to close up the wound, your hand already glowing, but he’s already gone. You kneel in a pool of blood, feeling it soak into your pants, looking around frantically for others who need help.

The goblins have already been felled but the half-orc and spider monster are still fighting, raging against your companions and the Harpers. You run to the next person you see sprawled out on the floor, healing as you move closer, there’s no time to assess damage, just heal, that thing rips too deeply into flesh to be precious with magic. You keep this one from bleeding out before you run to the next. Only risking a brief look around; Lae’zel is running her great sword through the monster as Astarion and Shadowheart feather it with arrows, and it goes down. The half-orc tries to make a run for it, but he doesn’t get far. More arrows from the remaining Harpers and he’s dead.

While everyone catches their breath you check over the casualties. There’re only a few dead; your constant healing during the battle prevented more from succumbing to their wounds and those that are injured are only minorly so, to the point where they can make it back to the inn and be cared for there. As you look down at your bloody clothes and bloodless weapon Shadowheart comes over to you with the monster’s lantern. It’s just like the broken one you’d found on Nere, but this one has something inside of it… Gale was right!

“Ooo! Ooo! It’s a pixie!” Astarion taps your arm and points at the tiny woman inside,“An honest to goodness pixie! Do you see it?” His eyes shine as he looks inside, marveling at her.

You’ve never seen him giddy like this before, Shadowheart turn a most confused look on himand you stifle a laugh,

“Yes. I can see that it’s a pixie.” His smile brightens your sour mood as you look inside at her.

She begins to frantically speak, her words rhyming with a melodic rhythm. She begs you to release her, that the lantern only works by hurting her. Shadowheart furrows her brow, like you she knows these creatures can be tricky, but you also know it’s better to help them rather than earn their ire. Astarion stops you before you open it, questioning you if you’re sure; you are. You undo the clasp on the tiny door, and she flies out. She opens her mouth to speak again and this time she has the mouth of a sailor! You giggle openly as she describes being trapped with only her farts for company. She offers a boon, for her rescue and release, something to help you through the foulest parts of the shadow curse; a tiny silver bell that you can ring, and she will come, or not. She laughs and flies away leaving you to rejoin the Harpers and head back to the inn.

Halsin and the others don’t return until well after dinner is served. It’s another sad cauldron of gray gruel and stale bread. You sit, slowly trying to manage your second bowl as they join you at the table. Halsin frowns as he crumbles the bread into his bowl and talks of their troubles in his quest. Their progress was halted by an impassable part of the curse. You mention the pixie bell, his eyes light up at the mention, saying it would surely be what they need to continue on tomorrow. Shadowheart mentions that maybe your group can try for Moonrise as well, that place still needs investigating and it looks as though Halsin still has more he needs to do, a smaller group going would raise fewer flags after all.

They finish up eating just as you manage the last bite of bowl number two. You don’t see Astarion so you lean into Shadowheart asking if maybe you can find a place to bathe and do laundry, the state of your clothes and body are something foul and you can’t stand it anymore. She gladly accepts, Lae’zel and Karlach, having been within earshot invite themselves along too. You smile brightly at them as Karlach rushes off to ask Jaheira where you can avail yourselves of such things, any excuse she can find to talk to her hero you suppose.

Jaheira directs you to a relatively secluded bit of shoreline near the edge of the dome and offers your things be washed with the Tieflings’ laundry, they’re always doing some. Shadowheart buildsa fire while you and Lae’zel put up some sticks to hang linens as a makeshift barrier and as a way to warm them before wrapping yourselves up after. Karlach hums to herself and dances while holding onto everything else you needed to bring down with you: buckets, soap, sponges, and a few borrowed long shirts. The few remaining Tieflings were very accommodating and insisted on sharing everything they had left: Karlach barely walked away with dry eyes.

Once you’ve all thoroughly scrubbed each other’s backs and removed as much built-up grime as you could you all lay around the fire. The heat enough to dry your skin and keep you warm without the need for the linens. The wind rustles the leaves, Shadowheart teases,

“You don’t think any of our boys would dare to sneak at peak at us while we’re naked?!” She holds her hand to her lips, a mock gasp of modesty escaping her.

“They would not dare. I would see them ended if they did.” Lae’zel stands, her lips already giving away her act, “I will not stand for such insolence!” She pretends to reach into the fire to grab a burning log to toss at the offending bush.

You and Karlach howl at her attempts at being funny, even Shadowheart joins. Laughter fills the night as you enjoy hanging out with these amazing ladies, your friends.

The four of you walk into the inn, rowdy and obnoxious with giggles still. Astarion looks over from where he sits at the bar with Gale, a bottle of wine and glasses between them. He smiles at you and nods towards the stairs, standing and walking away from his company. You hold in your excitement as you excuse yourself from the girls as they settle in at a table. You follow him up the stairs and settle under the cover with him: it’s well past his dinner time.

He ravenously devours you, one hand pinning your wrist over your head, the other hand beginning to wander. The piercing pain in your neck is sweet and comforting, his teasing hand a desired temptation. You want to feel him against your skin, your free hand pulling him into you more as your head grows hazy: you need more. You feel his hardness pressing against you, his hips moving ever so slightly, the friction on your exposed clit maddening. He releases his grip on your wrist, letting both of your hands pull at the laces of his pants. But you can’t get your fingers to work… They lose all dexterity as your hands begin to go limp.

“Talia?”His breath catches, concern in his voice as he whispers in your ear.

Why does he sound so far away?

“Hmmm?” Speaking doesn't come easily.

“You didn’t tell me to stop.”

“I… didn’t want… you to…” You barely get the words out between labored breaths. Your eyes close; you can't seem to keep them open.

“Gods damn it. We can’t keep doing this…”

He rolls off of you and just holds you to him, you’re not sure if he said anything after that.

Chapter 11

Chapter Text

1.

Your body is being shaken as a muffled voice calls to you. You try to open your eyes, they’re so heavy, it’s too hard, you no longer wish to open them. Instead, you just allow yourself to be rocked by the hands on your shoulders.

“Talia…” More gentle shakes fromthe voice, “Talia, you need to get up!” It’s a loud whisper in your ear:Astarion’s voice.

“Mmmmrrr…” You squeeze your eyes shut,still refusing to open them, “Why?”

“Because I’ve already let you rest for as long as I can. Everyone is up and almost done getting ready. If you don’t get up soon, they’ll know something’s wrong.”

“...Fine,” You let the hands lift you up and help you to stand.Your legs shake, your vision is blurryand your head throbs,but you’re able to walk without help, “Can you get me something to eat? I’ll get dressed…” You can’t remember what you’re doing today, “Do I need my armor?” You stare blanklyat the ground.

“Yes…” His voice is strained,“Talia, look at me.” He waits as you struggle to look up at him and focus, “Are you sure you’re alright?”

“Yeah,” You nod, hiding that the world swims when you do, “I’ll be even better after I eat. So, food please?”You implore with what you hope is a sweet smile and not a strained one.

He takes a long hard look at you, so you make a show of getting up and ready until he turns to leave. As soon as he’s down the stairs you crumple to your knees.It’s bad.Your mind is foggy, you can’t focus and just standing gives you vertigo. You pray you’ll be better after eating.

You don’t know how you manage to pull yourself together enough to get your armor on and braid your hair, but you do. By the time you make it downstairs everyone is waiting on you. You apologize as you scarf down one bowl of something markedly less foul than last night’s fare; it must be Halsin’s doing, poor man probably couldn’t stomach that slop anymore. There’s even fresh bread, so you grab a whole loaf to nibble on the walk to the bridge. Astarion’s eyes watch you the whole time, finally nodding his approval as you take a bite of your bread.

Halsin gathers everyone around him on the bridge, producing a map of the town, helpfully provided by the Harpers, and points out which route you’ll be taking. There’s a central bridge that will get everyone relatively close to where they need to be. There’s even a main road to follow, so there’s little worry about getting lost. Your biggest concern is getting back to the inn by the end of the day, there’s a lot of ground to cover not including whatever you have to deal with once you get to Moonrise. Halsin worries that there’s no other safe havens to have an extended rest. Shadowheart assures you that you’ll be able to make it back. You grumble saying you’ll just sleepwalk if needs be.

The whole of the walk you’re silent. Your head no longer swims, but you have a headache that throbsat the back of your skull, it is starting to dullthankfully. Nibbling bread helps you stay quiet while everyone around you talks. Halsin goes onabout his history with this place.He was here with Jaheira, though their paths didn’t cross at the time, it was an alliance between the Harpers and druids that brought down Ketheric Thorm. The general, in a fit of despair, changed from being a Selunite to a Sharran, then raised an army of Dark Justiciars and unleashed the shadow curse upon this land.Shadowheart points to all the bones with Dark Justiciar armor, there’s a great number of them scattered among the bones of those that fought them. Halsinisn’t surewhat advice he can give as far as heading to Thorm’s stronghold other than just gather information and get out of there. He need not be dealt with just yet.

You reach the bridge and ring the pixie’ssilver bell. Little DollyThriceheeds the call, insults you a bit but does her magicall the same. You give a smug ‘I told you so’ look to Shadowheart and Astarion as she flies off. Shadowheart smiles and rolls her eyes at you while Astarion simply arches a brow. He’s been watching you like a hawk this whole trek; every little stumble or wobbly step he grabs your arm to steady you. You keep insisting he doesn’t need to help you, you’re fine. You’ve started to feel almost normal again, if only you didn’t have so much to do, you’d recover quicker. You don’t want to make him worry. You’re fine.

2.

You step into the foulest part of the cursed lands, the pixie’s magic doing as she promised and protecting you all. Halsin and his group veer off towards the House of Healing, both groups bidding the other good luck. Lae’zel turns down the path with Shadowheart, you quickly follow behind, Astarion continues to stick close to your side.

In the distance there’s a soft white glow, the same as was coming off the pixie lantern, only there’s so much more of it. The stone bridge leading to the towers is empty, no sentries at the entrance but as you move further down, closer to the light you start to see figures in the haze. One of them calls out for you to halt, their armor clanking as they approach. Shadowheart steps forward to handle the talking. She’s well practiced at deception and doesn’t require the parasite to talk her way in, only using it to prove your statuses as True Souls. The other sentry joins, saying to be cautious, there’s rumblings about traitors and that you’d best report to someone: Disciple Z’rell.

You climb the stairs leading inside, through a massive set of metal double doors. The entrance hall is filled with all manner of people, creatures, monsters; all of them cult devotees or merchants looking to profit off its rise. You continue to follow behind, nervously looking around, but if it’s your own anxiety or that damned guardian you can’t tell. Since walking into this place, you’ve felt it lurking at the back of your mind. Astarion finally leaves your side to join Shadowheart at the head of your group. Lae’zel nods as you match pace with her, passing through another set of double doors and enter the audience chamber.

You stand silently just beyond the threshold. There’s shouting, you peek between Shadowheart and Astarion and see goblins cowering before the dais. There sits an older Elven man in heavy armor, glowering at the goblins as the half-orc standing beside him berates them for their failures. They try to defend themselves, but the half-orc unleashes a wave of psychic force, a compulsion, your parasite wriggles in your skull as you resist the urge to obey. The goblins fall silent, but one stands, unaffected, furious. The half-orc turns to the seated Elf,

“General Thorm?”

His eyes shift from the goblins to you and your companions standing in the back of the room, focusing on Astarion,

“Let our newest arrivals speak. You have seen what these creatures are capable of, and you have seen their inadequacies, what is your judgement?” His voice is deep and rumbles with irritation.

“I’d say kill them. They’re worthless.” Astarion’s voice comes out steady, controlled, and indifferent.

“That ain’t true! Just give us a chance. We’re good as anyone!” The goblin who remained uncowed cries out.

“There you have it.” The General’s lips spread into a small cruel smile as he rises from his throne and stands beside the half-orc, “We are too close to the ending and the new beginning. I can coddle failure no longer. Kill them. Quickly.”

The defiant goblin screams out, grabbing a halberd from a nearby guard and hurls it at the General, lodging it in his chest, throwing him back down into his stone throne. But her attack was pointless, the General reaches for the haft and yanks it out of his chest with a grunt. He oozes black thick blood, rises from his throne and slowly walks over to the stunned goblin, dropping the halberd at her feet,

“Try again.” She grabs it, and buries it in his neck, nearly decapitating him and still he is unfazed. Another grunt as he rips it free, tosses it aside and brings his gauntleted hands down on her head, crushing her skull, “Dispose of the rest as you see fit.” His eyes move to Astarion for a moment before shifting to the half-orc, “You, have other more important matters to attend to, or have you forgotten, Z’rell?” He turns and disappears up the stairs behind the dais.

“You heard the General. The goblins are yours, deal with them however you wish. Report to me upstairs when you’re done.” Disciple Z’rell then follows the General up the stairs.

Astarion strides forward as you release a breath you hadn’t realized you were holding. You look over to where he stands by the goblins having heard their cries for mercy. You watch as they plunge their daggers into their bellies, spilling their guts before collapsing into their own piles of gore. You grimace, hoping you’ll be able to walk around the mess as you follow Lae’zel and Shadowheart to the stairs.

At the top you find Z’rell and another cultist having a minor spat,buthonestly it doesn’t interest you. You want to get out of this place, the guardian’s presence continueshovering in the back of your mind,it’s anxiety about somethingrising. Z’rell turns her attention away from the other cultist and looks at Astarion,

“Excellent timing, True Soul. The goblins, tell me how they suffered. No, better yet, show me.” Her mind reaches out, forcing its way into each of your minds briefly before focusing solely on Astarion’s. You watch them silently stare at each other when her eyes turn to you, looking you up and down slowly, “Is she truly that delightful?” She licks her lips, undressing you with her eyes, “I wouldn’t mind a taste of her myself.” Your hair stands on ends as she speaks to Astarion, her eyes fixed on you, “The Absolute can make everything you desire more than real, should you serve Her well and prove your worth.” She finally looks away from you, “I have a job for you, True Soul.”

Z’rell goes on to say there’s a necromancer, Balthazar, that must be fetched from the temple across town. Should that necromancer require assistance in his objective, you’re to give it then return to the towers to reap your rewards. Lae’zel asks the distance to the temple and how soon the objective needs to be resolved. You ignore the rest; your mind is too occupied by the guardian speaking to you. He feels that this is indeed the seat of The Absolute, and that you need to keep playing along with these cultists until you can find out how to get to it. Gods! If he’s so worried about this then why does he only speak to you? You mumble something to Shadowheart about it, briefly suggesting she take the damn thing back, but she refuses, it’s clearly chosen you for it never speaks to her. You chew the inside of your mouth as you wait for them to move on, irritated at the whole situation.

You head back down the stairs. Lae’zel is concerned; she learned that the temple is too far away to reach today, so you’ve been instructed to stay the night, here, in the barracks. If you try to leave the tower it would raise suspicions with Z’rell and lead to more troubles than you’re able to handle. She suggests staying the night here and going straight back to the inn tomorrow. You’d be able to figure out what the next step should be with everyone. None of you like this plan, but the alternative would be worse; you don’t want to think about what that half-orc would do to you if you were thought to be traitors.

Since you will be stuck here for the night Shadowheart insists on gathering as much information as possible but do try to not be obvious about it. She and Lae’zel head off to the entrance hall tasking you and Astarion with finding the barracks. As Astarion watches the two of them walk away he leans over to you and whispers,

“When did those two become…” He doesn’t seem to be able to find the right words, so he just waves his hand between their retreating figures.

“Honestly? No idea.But it’s kinda cute.” You shrug, happy that he seems to have moved on from fretting over you.

“I suppose. But now there's no chance they’ll rip each other apart and put on a show. Shame.” He cups his own cheek and pouts; you smile at his insincere desire for their demise.

With no other real idea where to start you head through the first door on your right. You stand in the doorway a moment, it’s not the barracks. Your eyes cast around, it’s mostly piles of crates and barrels with a Drow woman in the back, fussing at a table laden with chemistry equipment. You take a step into the room, but Astarion doesn’t move, instead he wrinkles up his nose.

“What’s wrong?”You furrow your brows at him.

“Can’t you smell that?”He whispers loudly at you as you take a step back to him.

“Smell what?” The tower doesn’t exactly smell like a rose garden, but it’s certainly not as bad as the goblin camp had been.

“It’s coming from her,” He nods towards the Drow, you raise your eyebrows in question, “Ugh. She smells rank.”

“Like how? Surely, she can’t smell worse than the bugbear in the hall…” He you could smell, like most of his kind, there’s just a sort of musky wet dog smell about them.

Before Astarion can answer you, she notices the two of you hovering and whispering in the doorway,

“You there!” She waves at the two of you, “Yes. Yes, you. Come here.”You walk over as she appraises the both of you, holding her chin, leaning from side to side, looking you up and down. She stops in front of you before she makes up her mind, “Araj Oblodra. Trader in blood and the sanguineas arts. It is a pleasure to stand beforetwo True Souls, especially you, pale one.” The way she looks at Astarion as she says it is odd, “I would like to offer my services, if you’re willing.”

“What would those services be?” The oddness of her look doesn’t put off your curiosity. You’ve never heard of a blood trader.

“I make customized potions using my clients’ blood. I would need to extract some from you to make one. And my payment would be I get to keep what’s left for my experiments.” She turns to gesture at her equipment, “I require True Soul blood, and as that is what you are, I’m asking.”

“What do the potions do?”

“Well, that depends on you, your blood. But they enhance whatever it is that makes you, you.”

“Hmm, what do you think makes me, me?” You smile knowingly up at Astarion. He might have an idea since he’s had so much of you.

“Haven’t the foggiest,” He looks down at you and smirks while you pout, “Are there not enough True Souls wandering around here for you to experiment with?”

“Yes. But each one is unique, so I require as many different samples as I can get. So, will you?” Her eyes move from him back to you, they seem less excited to be dealing with you, whatever, you want to know what this potion will do.

“Sure. I want to see how this works.”

Youstep away from Astarion andlet her lead you over to her tablewhere sheopensa small cut on your wristto drain into a vial.Next, she simply adds a few drops of your blood to another vial, shakes it and hands it back to you. But as she does her eyes fix on Astarion,

“And one more thing… You’re a vampire are you not? Or one of their spawn at least?”

“How did you knowhe’s a vampire?” There’s something about how she’s looking at him, a hunger in her eyesthat makes you want to keep him away from her.

“Hah. In my line of work, you think I wouldn’t recognize one if I saw one?” She doesn’t take her eyes off him, “What’s your name spawn?”

“...Astarion.” He answers slowly, studying the Drow’s face.

“I have a proposalfor you. I’ll give you a legendary potion. One of my best, in fact. It will forever alter the drinker’s strength.You can have it,but only if you bite me.”Her eyes darken as she drags her fingertips down her neck.

“I beg your pardon?” You grip his hand suddenly, stepping closer to him, wanting to physically put yourself between them.

“I’m not speaking to you,” She flicks her eyes over to you, hergaze icy, then it softens as itgoes back to Astarion, “but to him.”

“You want to be bitten?” He only sounds mildly surprised.

“More than anything. Yes.”Her last word is breathy and heavy.

“OK. I’ll do it.”

“What?!” You yank him closer to you, your heart pounding in your chest.

“Could you excuse us just a moment?” He smiles at her while pulling you to the side, whispering angrily, “It’s someone else that’s willing to let me feed on them. I can’t keep nearly draining you every night while we’re here. You could barely stand this morning.”

“I’m fine, Astarion. I told you I can handle it.” You glare back at her, “And you said she doesn’t smell right.”

“I know that. But this may be our only other option for now.” His voice is pleading, but you don’t want to hear it.

“Fine.” You pull your hand out ofhis, “Do whatever you want.”

You watch him walk over to her, they exchange a few words before he takes her in his arms and brings his mouth down onto her neck. He’s only there a moment or two before he rips away from her, retching. You think about telling him you told him so, instead you storm out the side door and into the soft lantern glow of the lower battlements.

You don’t go far, just far enough to be out of site of the door. You stare out into the dark, letting the cold damp air chill you, a shiver runs down your spine as you fight to hold back tears. Ever since you told him about your darkness, he’s treated you differently. He’s been strangely distant while still being right there with you. He has something to say, but he never says it. You know you’re terrible at explaining yourself, you can never find the right words to describe the things that are so clear in your mind. The sound of a door banging shut brings you back from your roiling thoughts. You turn to look, seeing him walking over to you,

“Talia…” He sounds exasperated, but it’s you who should be feeling that way.

“What?” You turn to look backout over the water, your throat tight.

“This can’t… Gods.” He exhales loudly and sucks in a deep breath, “I can’t keep feeding on you every night as long as we’re here. We don't even know how long it'll be.” He rakes his fingers through his curls, “I know you told me about this dark need of yours to hurt, feel pain… But it feels like a death wish… Like you want me to kill you.”

“I don’t want you to kill me, Astarion. Don't be absurd.”

“NO! You don’t understand! Ever since I first laid eyes on you, I have felt something… something dark and possessive.”

“So? What’s wrong with that? I've felt like this my whole life!” You finally turn to face him.

“But how do you explain this new inexplicable needI have? Huh?” You remain silent, “Can you explain how just as you have this ridiculous need for me to hurt you, I now have this need to do it?! I want to make you cry out in pain. I want to dominate you, consume you, have everything that you are be subsumed by me! Like my life beholden to Cazador I want yours beholden to me! And I can’t stand the thought of it! I don’t want you to have this wretched life!”

“What if that’s the life I want?!” He looks at you as though he’s disgusted by what you want, “I’m not ashamed of wanting those things from you, Astarion! And I am not some damsel in a tower that’s needs rescuing from themselves! I want to be yours to do with as you please! Gods! I want you to do unspeakable things to me! I want to belong to you. I want to give you everything that I am; body and soul! I can’t help what I want, or what I am!” Your voice lowers, “I thought that’s why you wanted me…”

“I DON’T KNOW WHY I WANTED YOU!” He screams it at you.

3.

If he said anything after that, you didn’t hear him. The only sound you could hear was your own pulse thundering in your ears. The floor felt like it was undulating beneath your feet as you tried to flee. You know he grabbed your hands, but you wrenched yourself free and ran. You couldn’t stand the sight of him.

There’s bile churning in your stomach. You keep replaying his last few words, over and over. You keep moving your legs, finding yourself on a dock. There’s a small table with a bottle of something. You snatch it, hoping that its stronger than wine as you bring it to your lips. It burns going down, sucking the air from your lungs, making you cough.

You find yourself at the end of the dock just standing, staring out into the void. You bring the bottle back up to your lips only to find it empty. It didn’t help numb you to this crushing feeling in your chest. You sink to your knees and feel around for your knife. Clasping it in one hand, your mind desperate to feel anything other than this, you dig the point of it into your wrist and twist. You wait for Her to fill you with grace, but nothing happens. You wonder if this is what pain feels like for everyone else… You watch your blood drip onto the stone, absently thinking you shouldn’t waste it. You hold the empty bottle under your wrist to catch it all…

You hear the sound of boots on stone moving closer. They don’t say anything to you, just sit down next to you,danglingtheir legs off the edge. You finally look over to see it’s Shadowheart, she doesn’t say anything, she just sits with you,waitingpatiently for you,

“Why are you here?”

“I was looking for you, but I couldn’t find you.” She swings her legs briefly, “I found Astarion,” You wince at his name, “Is that for him?” She nods atthe bottle.

“Yeah…I guess it is…” You’re no longer bleeding; you must not have gone deep enough in your blind diggings earlier.

“Give it here,” She takes it before you can stop her,openingher own wrist over it.

“What are you doing?”

“Helping you because neither of you knows how to ask, idiot.” She smiles despite insulting you; she really is just like Ana.

“Thank you…” Tears start flowing and uncontrollable sobs shake your whole body.

She closes up her cut, the bottle being almost full, and she reaches her arms around you. She doesn’t say anything else, just holds you while you continue to sob.

Chapter 12

Chapter Text

1.

You don’t know how long you cryinto her arms, his last words haunting you. Every fiber of your being achesat the thought of losing him, of the fear he doesn’t want you, that he never did... Tears continue to fall as you think howthe only thing that quiets your darkness, the onlythingthat lets you feel Loviatar’s grace, the only one you can ever imagine being withis him.

Shadowheart rubs your back as you sob. Eventually your tears stop, your ragged gasps quiet down, and you just leave your face on her shoulder, finally feeling soothed by her. Once your breathing returns to normal she leans back and stands before shehelps pull you up, her face peering into your eyes as she speaks softly,

“I know that I don’t know everything that’s going on with you two, but you both need help and neither of you has asked for it. So…”

“I thought I could handle it…” Your voice is hoarse and low.

“Yeah. And he thought no one else would help him to not starve. This is exactly what I mean. The both of you, honestly.” She shoulders you gently, “So,let’s go give him his dinner,” She holds up the bottle and gives it a little shake.

“Yeah.” You manage a smile as you shoulder her back.

You continue toruminate,blindly following Shadowheart.What will you say to him? Should you apologize for lying about not being able to handle feeding him all on your own? Or that you liked itso much you purposefully let him go too far? Should you try to explain that he’s the only way you feel the blessings of your goddess anymore? That the darkness in you wants you to submit to him? That you think it’s somehow related to how he felt, but you don’t know how or why? What are you supposed to say to him? Is he supposed to say something first?

Shadowheart guides you through the tower to a quiet room that Lae’zel commandeered for your bunks tonight. Apparently, she was not about to sleep in the overcrowded barracks with all those cult freaks; they never shut up. You see Lae’zel coming down the hall, you open your mouth to say something, but she just zooms right passed you, not even looking as she rushes by. Confused you turn to Shadowheart, but she doesn’t say anything, just hands you the bottle, opens the door, shoves you through and closes it behind you,

“Please go talk to him. I think Lae’zel has had enough of his silent brooding.” Her muffled voice comes through the door,then you hear her footsteps fading away.

You turn away from the door and spot him sitting on a crate across the room; hunched, elbows on his knees, hands clasped in front of his mouth, red eyes staring intensely. An awkward silence hangs in the air as you stand there, unable to move, neither of you speaking. Everything you thought you might say vanishes the moment as you see him. Your heartbeat thunders in your chest as an eternity stretches before you, when you remember the bottle clasped in your hand. You twitch into motion, slowly walking towards him, holding it out once you’re close enough,

“Here you go,”

“Is it yours?” He leans back, resting on his hands as he looks at the bottle.

“Some of it… The rest is Shadowheart’s.” You’re still holding it out to him.

He lightly chuckles, watching you stand there fidgeting,beforefinally taking the bottle and bringingit to his lips,swallowinga few times. You watch him drink, fearfully chewing the inside of your mouth, wondering if mixing blood makes it taste differently. Will it taste better? Will he like it more? Will he not want yours anymore? Your friends are trying to help and all you can do is have these selfish thoughts. And it’s because you are his. You know it now. You belong to him. So if he doesn’t want you, what will become of you? You begin to shake, holding in your despairas you watch him drink.

“Ahh…” He holds the empty bottle for a moment before setting it down on the floor next to him,his eyes meetingyours again, “Are you going to say it? Or am I?”

“I’m sorry!” You exclaim, “I’m so sorry!” You’re sobbing again. So desperately afraid he doesn’t want you that it hurts.

“What you said before… Is that how you really feel? You want me to hurt you?” His voice is quiet and harsh and all you can do is nod your tear-stained face, “You want to be mine to do with as I please?” He stands, looking down on you.

“Yes… Maiden help me, it’s all I want!” Your sobs stopas you look up at his ravenous eyes.

“Then I’ll do just that. I’ll do whatever I want with you,”It’s a demanding whisper in your ear that makes you shiver.

He grabs you suddenly, pulling you into him as he kisses you hard. His mouth fierce,voracious,and you happilygive in to him; your darkness waking at his touch. His hands move; undoing the belts of your armor, dropping your chainmail to the ground, your padded tunic all but ripped offyour body. Between it all he kisses you harder, biting newly exposed skin, makingyou whimper and moan. You stand naked before him, his darkly hungry eyes devouring the site of you. You feel deliciously exposed,awaitinghis command…

He says nothing. He sits himself back on the crate and looks at you, smirking expectantly.Youflush,droppingto your knees, sliding your hands up his legs. He grabs a fist full of hair, forcing your head back as your hands undo the lacing of his pants, freeing him.Your hand grasps him, lightly squeezing, stroking, your other hand sliding up under his leather armor, a silent plea for him to be as naked as you.Heonly shakes his head as he pushesyour headdown to swallow his cockwhole, the grip in your hair tightening at he sets your pace.

The stone scrapesyour knees, tears sting your eyes as he pushes you down hard every time, the tip brushing the back of your throat. Gods, the feel of him, the taste of him makesyour body crave more. You squeeze your thighs together, feelingthey’re slick with your desire. You sway your hips, desperate to feel the relief of friction,moaningaround him,heshuddersat the sudden vibration. You press the tip of your tongue up,adding pressure,swirling it at the tip every timeyou slide up, sucking harder as you go. His other hand tangles into your hair,increasingyour paceuntil he cums,filling your mouth.The salty sweetnessgoingdown smooth as he wrenches your head back and growls,

“I want to fucking tear you apart,”

“As you wish,” Yourvoice husky and lowas your own voracious smile spreads across your lips.

Hemoves you tostraddle him, the crate digging sharply into your shins as youslide down, engulfing him, rolling your hips. His fingers diginto the softness of your hips, his teeth nip your breasts and teaseyour nipples. Youmove your hips faster, grinding down with every roll, feeling your clit rub against him, quickly bringing youecstasy. You pant,quivering in his grasp, and yet he’s not done.

He stands, holding you to him, still deep inside you as you grip him with your legs. He kneels, bringing you to the floor, laying you down on the cold stone, his mouth finding yours as he begins to move. He’s rough, ferocious, unforgiving in his thrusts. Each one driving you to the edge again, but his rhythm is tortuously slow: you ache for him, and he knows it. He smiles, watching your anguished face silently beg for him to give you release. He relents, building speed, plunging into you, relishing the sounds you and your body makes as he fucks you into oblivion.

He lays on top of you, still buried in you as you mindlessly twirl his curls around your fingersand trace the grooves of his muscles, careful not to linger on his scars. He had you twice more before his desire for you seemed to subside and you feel marvelous. You senseLoviatar’spresence; approving,encouraging;your goddess returning and filling you with Her graceonce more.

Your eyes drift towards the door,wonderingif Shadowheart and Lae’zel meant to return to the room or if they had found otheraccommodations. You suppose it doesn’t really matter. He kisses your neck where he had just been biting you; not draining you, just enjoying the taste of you. He leans up and looks down at you with a bloody smirk,you slide your hand from his hair to his face, your thumb on his lips, smearing your blood across them,

“What now?” You smile dreamily at him while he ponders the question.

“We should probably clean you up a bit.” His eyes drift to all of his love bites and bruisescovering your body.

“I suppose we should,” You pass your hands over every spot you can still feel stinging and then let him guide youto the rest, “And now?”

“Get some rest.” He stands to look for anything in the room that will serve as bedding.

“That’s not what I meant, Astarion.” You stand and see if your tunic is still wearable and pull it on, “What are we going to do now?”

“Whatever Iwant.” The look he gives you flashes with predatorydesire, making you bite your lip to stop from begging him to fuck you again.

You’re only mildly irritated at how he won’t answer you. You join him in looking around, thinking quietly to yourself, realizing he did answer you... You will do whatever he wants. And whatever he wants is what you want. All you need is him; your darkness shivers with anticipation as you accept your fate as his, to do as he pleases with you.

2.

Morning comes. Or at least you assume it’s morning judging by the noise coming from down the hall and the grumbling ache in your stomach. It’s then you remember you hadn’t eaten dinner and Astarion had his way with you for what must have hours… You need to eat. You shake Astarion, hoping to rouse him quickly, instead he pulls you back down to him, trapping you beneath him, so he can nip at your neck,

“Wait, my love, I haven’t-” But he ignores you and bites down, taking only a littlebefore pulling away.

“Sorry,my sweet. Just neededa little nibble to get me going.” He gives you a roguish smile.

“Mmhmm. If you say so. Now let's go before our friends come looking for us and so I can eat.” You gently push on him, so he’ll let you up.

You finger comb your hair in an attempt to tame it enough to braid again, then putting on the rest of your things you try to make yourself as presentable as possible. Astarion lets you fuss at him, tugging at his armor and smoothing back his curls, his eyes watching you all the while.

You leave your little storage room and make your way to the entrance hall where you spot Lae’zel and Shadowheart sitting at a table, eating. Gods, you’re hungry. They wave you over, as you go to sit Shadowheart stops you, you don’t have time to sit and eat, you will be eating on the way back to the inn. You want to beg to stay a little longer, but she shuts you down with how you all need to get back, the others must be worried sick. She shoves a small bundle of wrapped food into your hand as Lae’zel presents Astarion with another bottle. You pout, following them out of the tower as you dig into the bundle to find hard cheese, sausage and a soft bread roll, not a bad meal to munch while walking.

The pace Lae’zel wishes to set is not conducive to eating, nor to drinking, judging by Astarion’s refusal to match it. She gives up, an exasperated groan escaping her lips and Shadowheart just sighs at the two of you. You know this isn’t some leisurely stroll, but you really are starving, so you wolf down the food while Astarion takes his time drinking. While your mouth is otherwise occupied Shadowheart tells you of how Lae’zel was able to talk her way into yet another room for the two of them to sleep in unmolested by the cultists. You try not to laugh, afraid you’ll choke on your half-chewed food as you picture her being coyly deceptive, flirtatious even, with one of the half-orc guards. As the two of you giggle and chatter Lae’zel turns to look back,

“So, did you do as I suggested, Astarion?”

You perk up at her saying his name and turn to see him just staring at her before smilingly taking another sip from his bottle. Unable to contain your curiosity you turn to her,

“What did you suggest he do?”

“If he has not said, then it is not my business to say.” And with that she moves ahead of you and Shadowheart.

You turn a questioning face on him, but he only gives you a smirk then polishes off the bottle. Shadowheart has no idea what they’re talking about. She hurries to walk beside Lae’zel, whispering to her as Astarion strides over to your side, wrapping his arm around your shoulders as you continue walking.

The moment your group is spotted on the bridge you’re rushed by Karlach and Scratch, both of whom bombard you with questions and barks,

“Oh gods, you’re alive! What happened? Where have you guys been? Gods, I was worried sick! Why didn’t you come back last night? I waited up! I-” While Karlach clamors on, Scratch circles your little group, snuffling away as you try to make your way across the bridge. Thankfully she’s cut off by Shadowheart.

“I’m sorry, Karlach. We were not trying to worry you, but maybe everyone deserves to hear what happened?”

“Right! You guys head inside, I’ll grab everyone.” She runs off, Scratch hot on her heels.

You gather inside, waiting for the others. You sit on a bar stool, Astarion stands behind you, so you lean back and relax into him. As soon as everyone is gathered Shadowheart and Lae’zel relay what happened at Moonrise, how now you will be going to find the necromancer to get what information you can from him and plan from there. Lae’zel cautions it may take more than a day or two, the place is unknown and from the sounds of it, dangerous. With your little misadventure explained away Halsin begins to tell of what they were up to and what they need to do next.

You’re finding it difficult to pay attention; Astarion has started to wrap his arms around your waist so that he can lean into your neck and breath you in. His breath tickles delightfully, you try not to squirm, his closeness making your heart race and your breath go ragged. You manage to hear they need to perform a ritual before Halsin readies to walk away. But Shadowheart says there’s more that needs to be discussed, she pulls Astarion away from you so he can address everyone,

“Right… So, it would seem that I need… help from everyone. You see, there’s nothing for me to hunt here, so I have no sources of food, as it were,” He pauses for longer than Shadowheart likes so she nudges him to continue, “I was wondering if you all would be willing to… help feed me.”

Silence hangs in the air as everyone’s eyes briefly focus on you. You hunch down into your shoulders, making yourself a small as possible, wondering if they all know you were the only thing he was having.

“Sorry, mate. As much as I’d like to help you out, I don’t think you’d like to be on fire. But anything else, I got you.” Karlach looks genuinely sorry for not being able to, she’s always looking for ways to help her new friends.

“I fear I will also have to abstain from aiding you, my friend. Something tell me this Netherese magic I have consuming me has made me taste absolutely awful. Magic can do queer things to blood. And I do not know if it would affect more than just the flavor, there could be other, even less savory side effects.” Again, Gale’s loquaciousness muddles a simple ‘sorry, I can’t help you’.

“How was I not the first you asked, Astarion? Look at me!” Halsin gives a jolly chuckle, gesturing to his ridiculous size, “I clearly have the most to give!”

“I do not like having to do this, but if it will keep you from draining the smallest of us, I’ll help out, too.” Wyll looks at you like he pities you, like this wasn’t something you willingly did, like he thinks Astarion made you do it.

“I can still help.” You glare at him, you are not some hapless victim, you’re choosing to help him, “I just need a little time to recover between… his feedings…” But the fact of the matter remains, it is more than you can handle, and not just because you let it go too far.

“Then that is settled. We will all take turns providing Astarion with sustenance. Shadowheart and I have done so already today, but we must take provisions with us. She and Talia will gather what’s needed from you before we depart.” Lae’zel looks to the volunteers before going to prepare the rest of your party’s needs.

Halsin and Wyll stay with you and Shadowheart as you collect their blood. Halsin wasn’t wrong when he said he’d have the most to give; he nearly fills two bottles and doesn’t even seem fazed by the loss of that amount. You thank him, his meaty hands clasping yours when you try to close up the gash, his gentle smile spreading as he speaks quietly to you,

“You do not have to take on so much on your own, little flower.” How did he know that’s what you were called as a child? He sees your confusion, “Sorry. Did I say something wrong?

“No, not at all. It’s just that’s what my aunt called me, when I was little.”

“I thought it would suit you, seems like I wasn’t the first. I do not mean to pry, but I know I sensed Sylvanus’ magic in you, are you also a druid?”

“No… I grew up in a druid’s grove, I did learn some of it, but... But I was never welcomed there… Sylvanus’ blessings always felt wrong to me… You see, there’s something about me…”

“A darkness. I saw it when you rescued me. Don’t worry; I won’t ask you to explain, I won’t judge you for it, nor will I speak of it to anyone. We all have darkness in us. And it doesn’t seem yours makes you a cruel girl. Just be careful, whatever it is. Know that you can come to me, should you need to.”

“Thank you, Halsin.” His kindness warms you, the first druid to not look at you like you’re a monster.

Halsin goes off to handle his own business as you walk over to Shadowheart and Wyll. She still hasn’t gotten started, and you don’t understand why, then you see… Wyll is grimacing like a child as Shadowheart tries to hold his arm still so she can open his wrist. You stifle a giggle at this squeamish man, wondering if the reason he’s reticent to help is because he doesn’t like being in pain, no matter how little. Of course, he’s fine in a fight, the heat of battle probably distraction enough, but just doing this makes him squirm.

You leave them to is as you go to ready your packs before Lae’zel tells you it’s time to go. You walk towards the stairs, feeling his eyes following you. You turn to see Astarion sitting at the bar talking with Gale, a darkly possessive smile graces his handsome face, making you shiver ever so slightly. Something’s changed in him and you can’t get enough.

You pack your things and Astarion’s, making sure his bottles are wrapped and stowed safely deep in his pack. You hurry down to hopefully eat something before leaving. He already has a bowl and bread waiting for you beside him. He knows you so well. You beam at him, scooching as close as you can while inhaling the delicious porridge; Halsin as clearly taken over the preparation of food here, shame you have to leave again and miss out.

Shadowheart and Lae’zel had a few more things to take care of before departing so you wait with Astarion on the bridge.He stands close to you,fiddling with your braid, enjoying a quiet moment alone. You find yourselfslowlyleaning back against him and his arms wrap around you, his chin resting on the top of your headas you close your eyes. Your mind wanders back to what Lae’zel had said on the way here,

“What did shetell you to do?” You don’t even know if you meant to ask it out loud.

“What was that,my sweet?”

“On the way back, Lae’zelasked if you did what she told you to do,”

“Hmph.” His breath rustlesyour hair, “It’s nothing you need to worry about. But I did do as she suggested,” He leans further down, his breath in your ear now and you can't help but feel flushed, “Let’s not bring it back up again, hmm?”

“Of course not,” You settle further into his tightening embrace, “If you say I don’t need to worry about it, then I won’t.”

“And what of you, hmm? What were you and Halsin talking about while he was holding your hand?” His grip on you tightens, his fangs scratching along your pulse, and you fight back a moan.

“Nothing, my love. He was just saying if I need help, I can go to him.” You tip your head back against his shoulder, your body aching for more, your hands gripping his arms.

“Come to me first, my sweet.” It’s such a jealous growl breathed into your ear.

“As you wish.” You hardly get the words out when his fangs pierce your skin.

It’s the smallest of tastes, your blood only dripping a little so he can lick up your neck before he moves away to kiss you and you wish the two of you were anywhere but here. Lae’zel’s annoyed clicking tongue breaks you apart. It takes only a moment for you to prepare and head out.

3.

You walk with Shadowheart most of the way, she wanted to gush more about all the things related to Shar in this place, she’s never seen so much dedicated to her dark goddess nor seen her so openly worshiped. You continue through a graveyard until you can see a gated stone archway a little way ahead, surmising this must be the entrance marked on the map Z’rell gave Lae’zel. Shadowheart grabs your hand and rushes the two of you to the front, eagerly looking around,

“Can you feel that? The curse isn’t as strong here, almost entirely gone. Shar must be protecting where we’re going. Come on! Let’s go! Hurry!”

She pulls you and starts to run, but her glee is immediately dampened by that smarmy faced devil. He’s reciting some new cryptic warning in guise of a poem, his eyes, always hungry, and always lingering on Astarion. You glower at Raphael, your hand still in Shadowheart’s as Astarion steps forward to speak with the devil,

“How long were you skulking there, practicing that rhyme before I arrived?”

“Until it was perfect. I’ve grown quite fond of you, you know. In my own way.” His eyesstay fixed on Astarion though he’s speaking to all of you, “I thought it only fair to warn you about the dangers ahead.”

“Did you now? And what danger would that be?” Astarion continues to speak to Raphaelas you step closer to him, Shadowheart coming with you.

“There is a creature that lurks in silence and shadow. A creature, who like me, is very much of the infernal persuasion.” His voice rises, growingsharperas he continues, “In truth it is carnage incarnate. So, if you meet the devil of which I speak, kill it. Consider no other course of action.” He takes a breath to calm himself, “And don’t think I’ve forgotten your proposal, Astarion. When the beast is dead, I’ll consider that payment enough to translate those scars of yours.”

“Really? That is suspiciously fair.” Astarion shifts his weight, consideringwhat the devil says.

“You wound me, spawn. I always deal fairly. Now vanquish the beast and all will be revealed.” And with that final word he vanishes, leaving you all to think a moment.

“Is it really OK to agree to this?” You look up at his face, not really knowing if Raphael is truly being fair or if he has some ulterior motive for helping Astarion.You want him to learn about his scars, but you don’t want him doing something that will only bring him further misery.

“I think so. We only have to kill some beastie after all. Poor beastie, but I need to know what these say,” He looks into your mismatched eyes, tucks a stray lock of hair behind your ear and smiles confidently, pushing your worries aside, “Come. We have work to do.”

At first you think the mausoleum is a desecrated mess left by grave robbers, but then you realize the jumbles of bones and shattered tombs are the result of someone making effigies and performing the profane rites of Myrkul. One of the disturbed remains is a skull mounted on a pike spouting a recorded message. It’s from Balthazar, the necromancer Z’rell sent you to fetch, something about not wanting to be disturbed, to go away. At least it looks like he’s still alive.

Lae’zel nods, satisfied that so far, it’s not a wasted trip, before heading to the back, beyond another empty tomb to a hidden entrance of a temple of some kind… It’s a temple to Shar. Shadowheart gasps and drops to her knees, praying, paying her respects before entering its hallowed grounds. Though you don’t kneel, you do bow your head in mild deference, this goddess, though not your own, should be shown your respect. You hear Astarion scoff lightly, garnering an angry look from Shadowheart and a questioning look from you. What is he doing? This isn’t the time for his disapproval of the divine. He only arches a brow at you as you follow Shadowheart in.

The room looks deep and dark, two enormous statues of Shar loom on either side of a magical platform. As you all step on it the statues ignite with a purple glow as the platform descends into the darkness. You look up and around you, marveling at the opulent violet and golden room, grand staircases curving back up to where you just were, but they lay in shattered ruin, most of the entrance does, but it doesn’t detract from the beauty of the place. Shadowheart joins you in looks, her awe eclipsing your own.

You walk beside her, the two of you moving slowly, taking in every detail of the hall until you come to a small dancing statue of Shar encircled by a purple glow. A deep and sultry voice echos in the round room, the voice of Shar,

“Shar’s warriors must not be caught, must not be tricked. Only loss awaits the unworthy.” The voice fades and you and Shadowheart lock eyes.

“The Gauntlet of Shar before my very eyes, the Dark Lady guided me here. She wanted me to find this place.” Her voice goes breathy and quiet.

“Does this mean you can fulfill your dream, that you can-”

“Become a Dark Justiciar? Yes, I think it does… Oh, Talia, will you,” Her voice grows louder, as does yours.

“Help you? Of course! This is amazing! I can’t believe you’re defying your Mother Superior!”

“I know! But this is something I’ve always wanted and now I know My Lady wants it for me as well. I can do this.” You smile brightly at each other, excited to do this with your friend.

“Intriguing. Shadowheart, would this perhaps improve your combat skills?” Lae’zel gives the smuggest smirk you’ve ever seen on her.

“Yes, Lae’zel, I do believe it would.” She matches the snark and does her little head shake you find so cute.

“Ugh. Do we really have time for this little side thing for her?” His irritated scoff breaks into your bit of fun.

“Astarion!” You turn to him, almost astonished he would say that.

“What? I have my own matters to attend to down here, not to mention that business for the cultists.” You give him a little pout and he sighs, rolling his eyes at you, “Fine. So long as we can kill the devil Raphael has sent us after.”

“Of course we will, my love.” Did he truly think you’d abandon him to help her?

You step closer to him, your fingers gingerly reaching out for his hand. He looks at you, grabs your hand and pulls you passed the others, moving deeper into the temple, not even waiting for them to catch up.

You continue into a cavernous room that branches out in four directions. Off to one side there’s three shambling skeletons in armor that halt your progress,

“You do not belong here.” One of them shouts.

“No. You do not belong. This is the Dark Lady’s home. She has no use for old, faithless bones.” Shadowheart’s face darkens with rage as she looks at these trespassers in her goddess’ temple.

“You blunder. You meddle. You upset my plans. Leave before-” They all speak, but in turns, all with the same voice. Then they pause a moment before yelling at your party, “Stupid, worm-infested cockheads! You have awoken the shadows! My forces are split. The defenses are thin. Rally on me, a wall of bone and blade against the darkness. Now!”

The bones scatter as two swirling dark purple portals appear and empty animated Dark Justiciar armors begin to attack all of you. The talking bones help fight, taking on the armors at the portal nearest them. Astarion releases your hand to run into the fray with Lae’zel and Shadowheart. You see one of the skeletons shooting arrows at the swirling dark and realize you can damage that, prevent more armors from coming through. You run to the far one and swing away with your short sword. Astarion comes to your side of the fight, keeping the armors near you occupied until you get the portal closed. It’s doesn’t take long; the fight is over before you can get winded. You look up at the others to ensure they’re ok. They’re fine but the skeletons seem to have run off, disappearing deeper into the temple.

Shadowheart watches them running down a corridor and says to ignore them, she wants to investigate this large room. She begins to pour over every nook and cranny of the place with you while Lae’zel and Astarion quibble about where to set camp; either inside where the curse is entirely absent but there are those skeletons and guardian armors or back in the mausoleum where the curse is only lightly present but may still present unforeseen dangers.

Shadowheart insists staying in the temple is the better option, she’s adamant that Shar would not allow the guardians to attack you, it was those skeletons and whoever is controlling them that the guardians are after. You would also prefer the temple to the mausoleum, the temple has a lovely grand atmosphere you find pleasing, despite things trying to kill you.A compromise is reached;you’ll camp at the entrance where the magicplatformwas,it will provide the most protection from the shadow curseandif anything in the temple should attack, you will have a quick escape.

You go back to set up, it is getting late and between walking from Moonrise to the inn and the then inn to here and having a minor fight you are all wiped out. You set to dragging a brazier to the center of the room and start a fire while Shadowheart and Lae’zel get to setting up the bedrolls. As soon as they are put out Astarion moves yours further away from theirs and then settles with you on the floor by the fire. He leans into you as he drinks his dinner and you nibble on yours, enjoying the feeling of being near him.

4.

You wake to the feeling of Astarion’s hand roaming under your tunic, his lips brushing against your neck before he bites down. You clasp a hand over your mouth to silence yourself, you don’t want the others to hear you. He’s not there long, only taking a sip or two before he pulls his hand out of your clothes and gets up to start his day. You pout t the sudden loss of him, your hand moving from your mouth to the fresh punctures on your neck, closing them. You sit up and see you’re the last to leave bed, so you hurry to join the others in eating breakfast and putting on armor. It’s decided to leave camp set up so you’re not lugging around everything while trying to explore and most likely needing to fight more.

You head back to the large room from yesterday to start looking around more. Lae’zel believes the skeletons from yesterday belong to the necromancer you’re here for, so she wants to follow their trail. Shadowheart wants to look for the trials so she can perform them and Astarion looking for signs of his quarry. You let them each search for what they want to while you wander around. You notice an unusual number of rats, mostly congregating around sarcophagi and small altars; but no one wants to pay attention to you, so you keep quiet and keep wandering. And that’s when you spot it. It looked like a panther, but why would a panther be down here? You quietly creep down the way you saw it run off, unsure if you really saw what you think you saw.

It leads you to a broken stairway where it sits on the other side. It’s beautiful, but not what you thought, it’s no panther. It does have sharp claws on large paws, but there’s too many of them… there’s six of them… And there’s strange tail like feelers coming off its face that swirl around its body. You want to reach out and touch it… It looks like its fur would be so very soft…

“Are you serious, Talia?” His raisedvoice jolts you back from the stairs’ edgeas he strides to you,“Why did you wander off without telling me?”

“I didn’t mean to…” His angry face flusters you, “I thought I saw something, so I went to check it out.”

“Gods. Every time.” He mutters under his breath, “What was it?” He looks passed you at the now empty stairwell.

“It was like a panther, but not… I don’t know what it was.” For some reason his ire is so… enticing.

“Have you found something?” Lae’zel comes up behind Astarion, her eyes also searching behind you.

“Apparently…” Astarion continues to stare down at you with mild disapproval, and it makes your heart race, “She says she saw something over there though I didn’t catch a glimpse…” His nose crinkles a bit, “But I do smell something foul coming from down there. It may be worth a look.”

“Sounds good. I’ll fetch Shadowheart.”

The moment she’s out of sight he grabs your arm yanking you to him,lifting you up onto your toes,

“Don’t do that again.” It’s a whispered,growled command.

“Do what?” You can’t help the mischievous smile spreading across your lips.

“Your curiosity is liable to get us all killed.” His fingers dig in.

“Hasn’t killed me yet.” He glares at you, and you feel yourself wanting to push him… To fan the flames, make him angrier.

“Then how about I just don’t like you wandering off where I can’t see you…And without my permission…” An implied threat lingers between youas he claims your mouth in a fierce kiss.

“Ahem!” Shadowheartclears her throat,drawingattention to the fact you now have an audience, “Were we interrupting just now?”

“Sorry,” You lower your head, looking up at him through your lashesas hereleases the iron grip he had on your arm.

“Not at all. Shall we go?” Astarionanswers for you both, his eyes never leaving yours.

Chapter 13

Chapter Text

1.

You have to jump to make it to the other side of the broken stairs. Astarion won’t let you go first, once he’s sure there’s no immediate danger, he has you jump, followed by Lae’zel and Shadowheart. You look around as the others make their jumps and that’s when you spot it again. You turn and hush the others, crouching down as you do, pointing at it. Shadowheart whispers in your ear that it’s a displacer beast, and that it should not be down here. The two of you creep forward together, trying to get closer to the beast.

It runs off, further down the hall, but not like an animal fleeing danger… more like it’s luring its prey into trap. You stand and wait for the others. Astarion comes up behind the two of you, complaining the smell is getting stronger, the stench of fetid flesh. Even you can smell it now, pungent and putrid.

It dashes around a corner, you and Shadowheart rushing to follow, turning the corner and stopping dead in your tracks. You’ve found the source of the smell, a mountain of rotting corpses. It’s there the beast hunches, wriggling its shoulders and lashing its tail, like a cat ready to pounce. And that’s when you hear it, the sound of a crossbow being loaded, that distinct click when it’s ready to fire. You look up at the broken floor above you and your blood runs cold.

“What’s this?” It’s a deep grumbling voice coming from the mouth of an enormous devil, “Fresh entertainment?” He spreads his lips into a hideous smile. Lae’zel and Astarion come up to you and Shadowheart. Your eyes scan the ledge, the entire thing lined with devils, your mouth goes dry as the leader speaks, “But you’re too fresh for this place, aren’t you? There’s a whiff of the surface to you…” He sniffs the air like a hound, “There’s something else, almost hidden by your fear stink… cherries, musk… and Sulphur. Raphael! I can smell him all over you. Where is he?”

You’ve found the one Raphael wants killed, but how are you supposed to fight this monstrosity? He alone would be beyond anything you’ve faced. He’s surrounded by minions and there’s the displacer beast… Your mind races, trying to think of how you can even help. True Shadowheart had been helping you learn more protection spells and your healing has improved simply from the amount you’ve needed to use it, but should you focus on healing or protecting? You’re no longer sure what you’re capable of, so much has changed.

You can hear Shadowheart and the devil talking, but none of it is registering. You continue thinking about every spell you know, whether or not it would be useful here, where you should run so you’re out of the way but can still provide support, how can you best help everyone else fight. Your mind starts to clear, you have a few ideas on what you can do, but something is happening: the smaller devils are stabbing each other, their bodies disintegrating into ash.

Your mouth hangs open. You want to ask what’s going on; you’ve clearly missed something. You turn, looking at Lae’zel, her face is stern but calm while Astarion is scowling at Shadowheart.You look at her now, a cruel smile playing at the corners of her lips,

“You’re not finished yet, the displacer can hear you, can’t she? Kill her.”

“... Kill Nessa?” The devil looks over at the beast, she purrs at hearing her name, “Stay very still, my beauty…” He shoots her with the crossbow, you hear her body crumple to the floor, but your eyes never leave the devil, “Arh!! I still hear it!”

“Kill yourself, complete the contract, and you’ll be reborn in Avernus. Free.”

“If you’re wrong about this. I’ll claw my way out of Avernus and eat you alive, contract be damned. Nicely played, Raphael. Bastard.” And with his final curse he thrusts a blade into himself and falls.

Youremainsilent, relief flooding through you, as you stand awestruck by her power to manipulate a devil, but before you can praise her for it Astarion snaps,

“That had better count, Shadowheart!” He’s furious.

“What? It’s dead, isn’t it?” She turns to him, “Did you really think that the four of us could take on that monster along with all those minions and a displacer beast?” She looks at you before continuing, “We have other things to get to down here without needlessly endangering ourselves.” She stalks off towards the broken steps before he can answer.

“Agreed.” Is all Lae’zel says before following after Shadowheart.

You stay,waiting for him to say something but he just glowers at her retreating figure. What had she meant by that look she just gave you?

You walk into the central hall, Astarion pulling you along as you struggle to keep up with him. His mood has turned sour, he’s not saying anything, but you know he’s anxious about what happened. He needs that little ploy of Shadowheart’s to have worked so he can get his answers from Raphael. You want to comfort him, assure him that dead is dead, that Raphael didn’t add any stipulations on how the devil died, just that it did.

Lae’zel and Shadowheart are talking as you approach,

“I say we find this necromancer. He may be able to tell us more about the temple and point us towards the trials you are so desperate to find.”

“I’d rather ignore him until I fulfil my Lady’s wishes and then go kill him for defiling this temple.”

“I agree with Lae’zel, we should find Balthazar and be done with the cult’s business.” He stands beside her, his eyes cold as he looks at Shadowheart.

“I’m with Shadowheart. I’d rather help her.” You smile at her as she nods at you, but then he pulls you away from her, into him, his arm wrapping around your shoulders as he narrows his eyes at you… “But… maybe getting more information first, isn’t such a bad idea…” He smiles at that, and you can’t bring yourself to look back at her as she lets out an exasperated groan.

Lae’zel leads the way. The halls are long, and you walk in silence. Shadowheart walked off ahead of you and Astarion after you agreed to go to the necromancer first. You’re sure she’s mad at you for something, not just for changing your mind but also that look she gave you when she said ‘needlessly endangering ourselves’. Like you would put everyone in danger in a fight. You know you’re not the most reliable in a fight, but you don’t think yourself useless… At the very least you try to be helpful and to not be a hindrance, you can heal, you can use some offensive spells, you just prefer to reserve your magic for healing, you’ve started to get better with a sword, and your aim isn’t the worst with a bow anymore… So why did she look at you like that? Your brooding is interrupted by the skeleton trio again.

“Hurry inside, or your racket is liable to-” the ground begins to shake, “Rancid donkey scrotum! The quakes herald the shadows, it’s already too late!”

Empty Justiciar armors and more of those portals appear around the room you’re in, attacking you all. Now’s your chance to prove that you’re not useless. You ignore the skeletons and focus on helping close the portals while everyone else fights the armors. You manage to get two closed before more guardian armors come through. Lae’zel is having a hard time, pinned down with a gash on her leg; you heal her up and even cast a protection spell so she can fight harder. You run to another portal to help Shadowheart, but more are opening up. Two of the skeletons are gone, it’s harder to get to the last of the portals, Astarion provides you with covering fire as you run, casting a mass healing spell as you go. Your sword comes down on the last of the portals, it shimmers and vanishes, leaving you to look around at everyone. You’re winded, but everyone is injury free and you’re not even that drained. You’re rather proud of yourself. Hopefully that will prove to them you’re not worthless in a fight.

The remaining skeleton opens a large door to a room with more animated corpses, a grotesque pieced together flesh creature and a rather corpulent man behind a large stone table; you assume that must be Balthazar. Shadowheart doesn’t move to go in while Lae’zel and Astarion stride right on through, you stay with her. She glares into the room,

“I’m staying here. Let them get what they want from him.” She turns and stalks towards a pillar and leans against it.

“I’ll stay with you.” Your voice comes out lower than you would have liked. You know she’s anxious to be done here and get back to finding the trials, and you want to show your support for her, but don’t really know how, you’re convinced she thinks you’re holding everyone back.

You stand in awkward silence with her, the voices from the other room drift out but you can’t understand what’s being said. So, you wait for Astarion and Lae’zel to return and tell you what they learned.

They come out and tell you and Shadowheart that you’ve been tasked with helping hi bring back a relic to Moonrise, this relic is what grants the General his immortality and the way to get to it is by getting passed the gauntlet that Shadowheart needs to become a Dark Justiciar. Your eyes widen with relief and excitement as you turn to Shadowheart,

“See, it wasn’t a terrible idea to come here first, right?”

“I know…”She rolls her eyes at you before smiling, “I just want to get this started. I need to do this. And…thanks, for wanting to help me.”

“Of course! Now let’s go make a Dark Justiciar of you.” You link arms and stride off towards the trials,quieting the doubt plaguing you.

2.

You enter the first room of trials. There’s a statue of Shar holding out a large basin, behind it there’s a wall with locked gates in a few doorways. Shadowheart goes to the statue, slices her wrist over the basin, her blood a sacrifice and then she prays. A moment or two passes before she opens her eyes,

“I’ll do this alone. Just wait for me here,”

“If, you’re sure. I can come, if you want,” You’re eager to help, but understand if these trials are intended to be faced alone.

“No. I can do this.” There’s quiet resolve in her voice as you watch her disappear beyond a gated doorway.

“What do you suppose these trials will entail?” Lae’zel walks up next toyou andthe statue, studyingit more closely.

“I’m not really sure. I suppose they’d be challenges based on the tenants of Shar’s worship. I don’t know much about their practices other than secrecy is paramount.” You shrug, “And a deep-seated hatred for Selune,” You smirk thinking of the cave. It feels like so long ago now, but really, ithasn’t been.

You walk around the room to see if there’s anything interesting, but it’s mostly old bones and broken pottery so you just lean against a wall and wait. You don’t know how long you stand there, but it’s long enough that you start to line up pebbles with your foot. You can feel Astarion watching you. Every step you took around the room his eyes followed you, you’d stop and smile at him, but he didn’t speak or move, just watched you. You wonder if he’s still thinking about what happened with the devil.

Shadowheart emerges from a different gate, breathless but triumphant. You rush to her, clasping her hands and bombarding her with questions, not letting her catch her breath. She shushes you with a hand to your mouth and giggles but reveals nothing: a secret as you thought. All she does is insist you move on to the next trial and you let her pull you along excitedly, feeling his eyes on you as you hurry by.

You enter the next trial room, the walls are lined with reliefs of Shar, four pillars surround the statue with the basin and a single narrow door lies beyond it. Shadowheart makes her sacrifice and goes through the door. You occupy yourself with looking at one of the reliefs, mildly jealous of what Shar is wearing, before growing bored and going to sit with your silent companions. Lae’zel’s silence seems to come from a general sense of calm, like she understands these trials must be done alone, so no need to interfere. Astarion’s silence seems to be more from consternation than anything else. You place a hand on his leg and give a reassuring smile, he breaths heavily, wrapping an arm around your shoulder to pull you in close as you relax into his embrace.

“I could use a little help here!” Shadowheart half drags herself to where you’re sitting.

“Shadowheart!” You scrambleto help her,noticing a bloodied hand clenching her side, “What happened?” You sit her down to take a look, she’s closed the wound, but it must have been deep, there’s so much blood on her.

“Just a silly mistake,” She hisses in pain, and you can see another gash on her that’s still oozing, “You mind?” She smiles through her wince, about to gesture to itbut your hands are already busy at work, “I had to fight myself… Hah… Didn’t know I was such a wily bitch up close.”

“You’re downright brutal up close.” You smile at her as you look for more wounds, healing anything you find, “I take it you passed?”

“Damn right.” Her voice sounds less strained but she’s going to need time to recover a bit.

“Fantastic. Now could I maybe suggest youstop for the day?” You help her to stand.

“That sounds like an excellent idea. As much as I want to keep going, that may not be the best thing right now.” She drapes her arm around your shouldersso you can walk together.

“How can we be sure this is the real Shadowheart? If she says she fought herself…” Lae’zel can’t hide the smirk giving away her ruse as she starts to walk ahead of you two, you’re beginning to like this new side of Lae’zel.

“Oh haha, very funny Lae’zel. It was a shadow version of me, not a doppelganger. It just managed to sneak up on me, that’s all.” She does a little head shake and playfully purses her lips.

“Now, now,Shadowheart don’t go beating yourself up over- oh wait… You already did…” Astarion’s cheeky smile flashes as he joins the procession back to camp, his mood seemingly improved.

You get back to camp and help her out of her armor. As she settles down on her bedroll you rummage in your packs to get something to eat. You sit with her, letting her talk as much as she can about the trials thus far, which isn’t much. But she’s so enthusiastic about the whole thing, at every trial she has felt her goddess encouraging her, she’s felt like this is her destiny. You are so happy for her; you too know the joy of feeling blessed by your goddess and of the feeling of having found what you’re meant for. You look across the little camp at Astarion and smile to yourself.

Although the two of you could talk all night, she is tired from today and will turn in early for the night. You’re not tired at all but you do want to get more comfortable, you shed your padded tunic and pants to put on a long shirt to sleep in and free your hair from your braid. You walk over to Astarion, who’s still drinking his dinner.

“May I join you?”You tilt your head and give a coy smile.

“The pleasure would be all mine,” He holds his hand out to help you down when he suddenly looks behind you, narrowing his eyes and you here Raphael’s voice,

“Do you know what happens to a devil when it’s struck down on this charming plane of existence?” He makes his way over to you, swaggering as always. You take Astarion’s hand to help him up instead of joining him on the floor, “It returns to the hells - to the very point it last stood before venturing to whichever devil forsaken plane it died on.” You stand beside Astarion as Raphael continues on, “In the case of Yurgir, the orthon you so handily dispatched in the temple of Shar, he manifested in my House of Hope. He thought I would dismember him, but he has his uses so instead I’m reeducating him.” He finishes with the smuggest of smiles.

“We delivered the devil. Now I want what I’m owed. We had a deal.” Astarion bristles at Raphael.

“Indeed, we did. I discovered all there is to know about those scars of yours.” He gestures at Astarion, “It’s a rather grim tale, even for my tastes. Now brace yourself, Astarion, we’re about to unveil your destiny.” You see Astarion stiffen and clench his fists. “Carved into that ivory skin of yours is one part of an infernal contract between the archdevil Mephistopholes and your former master, Cazador Szarr. In full the contract states that Cazador will be granted knowledge of an infernal ritual so vile it has never been performed. The Rite of Profane Ascension. It promises to be a marvelous ceremony. Very elaborate, incredibly ancient and entirely diabolical. If he completes the right, he will become a new kind of being. The Vampire Ascendant. All the strengths of his vampiric form will be amplified, and alongside them he will enjoy the luxuries of the living. The arousals and appetites of man will return to him and unlike Astarion, he will have no need of a parasite to protect him from the sun.” Your eyes focus on Astarion’s face, watchinghis eyes widen, “But the ritual has its price, as all worthwhile things do. Lord Cazador will need to sacrifice a number of souls, including all of his vampiric spawn, if he is to ascend.” This time it’s your eyes that widen and you feel your stomach sink, “Imagine how he felt then, when one of those precious spawn simply disappeared into thin air. The only missing ingredient is Astarion. You are the final piece he requires to complete the ritual. Your scars bind you to it. Your soul will set off a very wave of death, bringing Cazador his twisted life. And that my tragic and toothsome friend, is that. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have business elsewhere.” And with a snap he vanishes in a whiff of sulfuric smoke.

You reach out and grasp Astarion’s arm as he stares at the ground,

“Hmmm…” It’s like he doesn’t even notice you, he’s so lost in thought.

“Astarion?” Your voice is quiet. What Raphael said…

“Yes?” He finally turns his gaze on you.

“Are you all, right? That was...” How do you put into words what just happened? The monster that turned and tortured him intends to now sacrifice him and the thought of it just…

“A lot to take in, I know… There’s a way to become a living vampire…” His eyes focus on something far away, “I could get rid of the worm in my head and still walk in the sun. I’d finally be free of the hunger.” His whole body seems to vibrate with the promise of a better life, “And if I’m the key to this deal of Cazador’s, perhaps I can turn this to my advantage… I need to take the fight to him.” He looks down at you with that hungry smile, “And you will help me.”

“Of course, my love. I’d do anything for you.” His hopefulness quiets your fears, just looking at him and you know there’s nothing you wouldn’t give to see him happy.

“You’re sweet, my love.” He gently caresses your face before kissing you softly.

But that soft kiss quickly turns vicious, his mouth leaving your lips to bite your neck. You gasp, biting your lip to keep from moaning. Shadowheart may be asleep but you’re certain Lae’zel is still awake. One of his hands grips your ass, pulling you close while the other tangles in your hair, his mouth still hungrily sucking at your neck. You want to give in to it all, but you know you can’t. There’s too much happening for you to risk being drained right now; you don’t know what tomorrow will bring. You fingers tangle into his shirt, ready to give him your signal but before you can protest, he pulls away and kisses you again with bloody lips, you don’t stop yourself moaning into him this time. He smiles into your kiss, his lips moving to your ear, whispering that it’s time for bed. As he leads you to your shared bedrolls you find yourself hoping he’ll continue. It’s almost unfair how easily he riles you up.

3.

He did not continue. And you’re certain he did it on purpose, like he enjoyed making you want him just so he could deny you. You wake feeling… frustrated. You need to do something to distract yourself. Thankfully Shadowheart is already up so you go to her,

“How are you feeling this morning?” You pull her braid out of her armor as she finishes fastening it, smiling and shaking your head as she had done to you.

“Much better thank you. I’m ready to finish this.” She tugs everything into place and smiles.

“Hopefully we can finish this today. I’ve run out of… food.” Astarion surprises you when he comes up behind you. He noses into your neck and teases you with his teeth.

"Ah! Astarion!" You didn't mean to gasp like that, you know your face is flushed and you try to raise your shoulder, but he pushes into your neck further, his fangs threatening to pierce your skin.

“Chk. Must you indulge in such displays of affection?” Lae’zel approaches from the side holding a half-filled bottle out to Shadowheart, “It’s unsightly.”

“Sorry.” You try to wiggle out of his grasp, “Astarion we should get ready.” But he only holds you tighter, lifting his head to look at Lae’zel,

“And ignore your good advice?” He finally releases you, but keeps a hand gently caressing your neck, “I think not.”

“That is not what I meant. But do as you wish, Astarion.” She turns to finish packing her things and readying for the day.

You look to Shadowheart, both of you shrugging, still not privy to what Lae’zel had said to Astarion and they were clearly referring to it just now. She goes off to finish filling the bottle and packing her things as you let Astarion lead you back to get ready. He helps you put on your armor before packing the bottle Shadowheart gives him, you suppose he’s not hungry yet considering he had a full bottle and you last night. You finish packing and pile everything on the platform, everyone hoping that today will be the last spent here.

Shadowheart leads the way down to the next trial, arm linked with yours. You chatter excitedly about how she’s almost done and then when she gets to Baldur’s Gate, she will show her Mother Superior just how wrong she had been to deny her dream all this time. You stride passed the previous trials, down deeper into the temple to the final trial…

This room doesn’t separate the trial from the statue, instead the whole thing is laid out before you and you look on in awe. Shadowheart goes to the statue to make her sacrifice and pray while you look around. The floor leading in has a strange pattern in the tiles, and beyond the raised ground you stand on is a darkness that obscures the floor beyond. There are more raised platforms amidst the darkness and at the far end is another statue that looks to be holding something, though you can’t make out what.

Shadowheart finishes her prayer and walks over to the patterned floor tiles and studies it. You watch her silently count, her finger tapping the number and direction, then she closes her eyes and repeats it without looking, then does it a few more times before nodding to herself and walking into the darkness…

You had all remained silent as she had done this, sure that whatever this trial required, failure would mean death.

You find yourself nervously watching her, chewing the inside of your mouth and digging your nails into your palms. You walk over to the pattern and follow the path she’s taking, willing her to remember everything correctly. You even try to see if you can remember it, treating it more like memorizing a dance than anything else: a poor attempt to calm yourself. You flick your eyes back up to Shadowheart, she’s standing stock still, breathing heavily. You check where she is on the map, she’s so close… Should you call out to her where to go? Should you let her do it alone? Would Shar do something if one of you were to interfere? You find your own breathing getting faster, shallower as you watch her… She can do this… You know she can…

Shadowheart takes a deep breath, steadies herself and turns, walking confidently to the final goal. She climbs up to the statue, claims her prize and is transported back to where you all stand waiting for her. You rush to her and hug her, she’s surprised but returns the hug.

“Gods! That was nerve wracking! But you did it!”

“I did!” She’s breathless, pleased with herself, “But I knew I could. Never a doubt in my mind.” Her cheeky head shake makes you both giggle.

“Yes. A job well done. Is there more to this? For you seem no different to me.” Lae’zel arches a brow and gives a now easy smirk.

“As a matter of fact, there is more to it, Lae’zel.” Shadowheart leans in her direction, sweet sarcasm tingeing her words, then she hooks her arm into yours, “We have to go to the library to get something needed for the ritual. And if I’m not mistaken you can all come with me for that part, the trials are done.”

You walk out the door with your friends as Astarion silently follows behind. You come to the entrance to the library, there’s no door so you can see inside though there is a strange magical barrier over the archway leading in. You look inside as you get closer, it looks like an amphitheater, all sides of the room leading down to the center, though you can’t see the bottom from back here. You get closer to the barrier, testing it and find it’s passable, but the moment you pass through the threshold something feels off… You can’t feel your magic. Your eyes meet Shadowheart’s, she feels the same sensation while Astarion and Lae’zel seem oblivious. You go to say something, warn them but that’s when you see the enormous portal at the center of the room, swirling with malefic magic, awakening its guardians.

You reach for your bow, the only thing you’re capable of doing now is firing arrows and praying that they hit. Your aim has improved, but when things are too far away you still tend to miss more than hit, you heavily depend on your magic to supplement distance fighting. You’re not terrible with your short sword and shield, but you know you’d only be in the way if you ran into the fight with Shadowheart and Lae’zel. Astarion throws down his quiver at your feet before drawing his blades and running, following close behind the girls.

You hold still a moment, trying to calm your mind and take in everything that’s happening. What is the best thing for you to focus on right now? You don’t want to fire at the guardians the others are in close combat with, you’d risk hitting them. You don’t want to try hitting the ones that are also firing arrows, they’re so far and you don’t want to waste every arrow trying to hit them. The portal is the only thing you know you can handle, you’re good at closing them by now; they don’t move, and you can slowly walk down the stairs while firing. Hopefully that will get you close enough to then fire on the archers once the portal is closed. You take a deep breath and notch an arrow.

Your simple plan is working. You’re making slow but steady progress. You’re keeping an eye on the others, so far no one is down or looks too badly hurt. Their fight has moved away from the portal, so you run to it, pulling out your sword and slashing it. As soon as it vanishes your magic comes flooding back to you, almost overwhelming you as you close your eyes and concentrate, releasing a massive wave of healing for everyone. Revitalized they rush the last of the guardians and finish them. You collapse, laying on the floor panting, overcome with adrenaline and relief.

“Talia!” Astarion runs down the stairs to where you’re sprawled outon the floor, “Talia! What’s wrong?” He stops himself before he grabs you, lest he makes anyinjury worse.

“I’m fine!” You quickly sit up to show him, “I was just, fwahhh. That was such a rush, I just needed a second.” He pulls you into him then holds you out at arm's length to examine you, “I promise, I’m OK.” Trying to reassure him by smiling and putting your hand on his cheek.

He opens his mouth to say something, but you look up at Shadowheart as she and Lae’zel walk up behind him. They were both worried when they saw you go down but are now easily convinced, you’re fine. Shadowheart says she’s going to look around while you catch your breath. You ask Astarion to help her, you think that gate could probably use his gentle touch. You nuzzle his chin as he stands, his face still creased with concern, you don’t know why he still looks almost distraught. Once he’s walked away Lae’zel sits down next to you on the steps,

“Your combat skills have improved since we first met.” Her compliment catches you off guard.

“Oh! Thank you.” You giggle, a little embarrassed,“It’s probably because you guys have been helping me so much. I wouldn’t know the first thing about fighting if it weren’t for all of you.” You genuinely are thankful foreveryone trying to help you be less useless.

“You are not the burden you think you are,” She puts a hand on your shoulder, “You should have more confidence in your abilities. You show great care in what your actions should be in any given situation, you understand your companions’ needs and are able to act accordingly, and you can fight through injury like I have seen few do.” She stands up and goes to join Shadowheart at the bookshelves, leaving you to think about her words.

Astarion gets the gate open as you meet Shadowheart at the base of the stairs then you follow her into the book lined room beyond the gate. She goes to the pedestal in the center, places the book on it and waits… The wall at the back slides down and reveals another little room, a statue of Shar like the ones in the trials waits, a darkly beautiful spear lays on the offering basin, presented to the one who has earned it. Shadowheart steps forward and bows, praying before reverently lifting it up, grasping it in both hands,

“The Spear of Night, the weapon my Lady has bid me wield.” She smiles triumphantly.

But before she can walk away you point to something next to the statue… A set of Dark Justiciar armor. You both reach for it, lifting it up and holding it to her, it looks like it will be a perfect fit, like it was left here for her. Giggling like a pair of giddy fools, you help her change into it, and she looks magnificent. You stand back and admire her,

“Perfect! I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone so suited to their uniform before, but you look stunning in that Shadowheart!”

“Thank you, Talia. Now let’s go, we have to get to the inner sanctum.” Again, she pulls you along, hurriedly running to her destiny.

You ride another magic platform down to the dark depths of this temple, passed another ornate door that opens to reveal an even darker room, stairs descending into it. Shadowheart steps in front and leads everyone in, down the steps as braziers on either side light themselves as you pass, a glowing pool at the feet of another statue of Shar awaits.

“The end draws near. You show great potential, do not falter now. One more test awaits. Descend to the Nightsong. Make a sacrifice. Rise again a Dark Justiciar.” The sultry eager voice of Shar reverberates in the room.

Shadowheart kneels before the pool, her head bowed in prayer for but a moment before she stands, a dark gleam in her eye as she steps down into the pool, turning to look back at you,

“Come on.” She holds her hand out to you, and you take hold of her as you step into the water.

But it is not water, it is the entrance to the Shadowfell and you can feel the divine presence of Shar all around you. You’re in a swirling dark maelstrom, great floating islands of rock surround you, spiraling down to a single point. You have to jump to them, this place letting you float from one to the next. Each landing is greeted with the specters of Dark Justiciars past, all speaking to Shadowheart, all telling her to ‘descend to her’, and she charges forward, encouraged, determined.

As you get closer you can see a glowing circle with something inside of it. You land on the final rock, Shadowheart walking before you as you approach the glowing circle of undulating glyphs and spectral hands grasping at a strange woman.

Chapter 14

Chapter Text

1.

You stand there, dumbstruck, looking to the others, wondering what they make of this. Shadowheart is the first to move, but the strange woman ignores your group, instead looking up, passed you all and speaks,

“Balthazar. Come to add more bars to my cage? Or perhaps to lead this would be Justiciar’s blade directly to my heart? I invite you: heap more sins upon your head. My retribution will be all the sweeter for them” Her words drip with venomand her eyes burn looking at the descending necromancer.

“All this time, and you still fail to appreciate the gifts I bestowed on you, Aylin. Sad, to see a thing of beauty not recognize its own worth. But General Thorm, he appreciates you. And he wants you close at hand, so I am here to whisk you back to him.”

Balthazar stands before the trapped woman, looking down at her as though he’s disappointed with her desire to be free and kill him. Shadowheart shifts her weight, holding her spear tightly in one hand, watching the two speak, growing agitation etched across her face. Balthazar begins to move his hands, magic glowing as he prepares to take the woman back to General Thorm, and Shadowheart watches, shaking with rage,

“The Nightsong is Shar’s sacrifice. She’s, my destiny. You cannot have her!” She shouts at him.

“I can do whatever I want! She is mine. An aasimar bound to a soulcage of my creation!” His hands grip the air, continuing to cast his magic, his voice heavy with irritation.

“You are interfering with Lady Shar’s bidding! And for that you will die!”

Shadowheart grips her spear in both hands, her whole body wrenching towards him, driving it into the belly of Balthazar,twisting and shoving it in further, forcing him down onto his knees. He gurgles, gasps and then finally chokes on his own blood as sherips the spear out of him, spilling his guts onto the floor.

“Balthazar has drawn his final rancid breath. A pity it was not my hand that brought it about. Instead, it was you.” Aylin’s eyes shift from the corpse on the floor to Shadowheart, “You,who have come to find the wicked favor of your goddess. You, who have come to drive a dagger through my heart.” She stands tall, defiant,the spectral hands grippingher.

“Not a dagger. A spear. With my Lady Shar’s spear!” Shadowheartisbreathless,speakingto the prisoner.

“Do you know what it means to become a Dark Justiciar? For to become one is to turn your heart from everything but loss. You will know no love, no joy, only servitude. Until of course your mistress inevitably discards you. And there is much she does not tell you. A terrible blood price that may extend beyond my own death.”

You watch Shadowheart the entire time the aasimar speaks. This, becoming a Dark Justiciar, means so much to her and yet, she’s hesitant. Her face is a contorted array of conflicting emotions, her lips tremble and her eyes search the aasimar’s for something, but she remains silent as Aylin continues, her eyes focusing on the spear gripped in Shadowheart’s hand,

“A spear intended for my heart. Empowered by your goddess to kill the child of a god. Do you know what I am, little assassin? For I know you. A lost child, frightened by wolves in the dark.” Her eyes focus on Shadowheart’s.

“What did you say?” Her brows knit together as she leans away from Aylin.

A memory flashes through your mind: wine shared, half drunken confessions of life’s regrets and fears, a secret revealed only to you, of a dark forest and a wolf with its teeth bared and Shadowheart touching her scar…

“Much has been promised to you, hasn’t it? But what has been taken from you? What do you know of your own heart, your own life? I sense more in you than you know,”

“Whatever you think you know of me won’t matter, once I become what I’m meant to be.” You watch her ready the spear, both hands wringing the shaft before she twists her whole body to the side and throws it into the abyss. She looks up at you, both of you surprised by her actions, “I… I can’t believe I just did that. Lady Shar will disown me… what will happen to me?”

“Not what will happen, what will you do. Your past is not yet lost. Your future is not yet fixed.” Shadowheart turns to Aylin, “Lay a hand on me in friendship, not quite Sharran, and I will fight the battle that has been waiting for me this last century. Then we will have much to discuss.” Aylin kneels down in her glowing prison and Shadowheart lightly places a hand on her shoulder before walking backwards towards you.

Everyone watches in silent awe as this aasimar reclaims her divine regalia. Moonlight emanating from her as magnificent wings find their place on her back. You reach out your hand to Shadowheart, holding hers in a fierce grip,feelingher tremble next to you. Thischild of a goddess speaks again to Shadowheart,

“Do you think it curious that you would spurn your Dark Lady? Perhaps you feel a stirring of the truth already. But that will come later. There is a battle yet to be fought.” She turns from you all and spreads her wings, flying up and out of the Shadowfell.

“We need to leave. Lady Shar won’t stand for us to be here. Not after what I did.” Shadowheart’s eyes follow the vanishing aasimar.

“If she’s angry, she’s being awfully quiet about it.” Your grip and hers increase, something feels wrong here.

“That’s what frightens me. She must be angry, yet I don’t feel it… There’s only silence.” Shadowheart’s voice cracks and you recognizethatfeeling, it’s something you had recently felt;the loss of her goddess’ presence and your heart aches for her.

2.

You flee the Shadowfell, running, bursting out into the graveyard, but Shadowheart’s hand no longer clasped in yours. Panic sets in, you turn to go back for her, you won’t leave her. Astarion shouts for you to stop but you can’t, you’re already moving. You only manage a few steps before she appears and you almost collide with her, instead you throw open your arms and hug her,

“Where were you?!” You hold her out and see she’s cradling the hand with the mark,shaking her head, unable to speak through the pain, “What happened?”

“Shar indeed made her fury known… I’ve never felt such pain before. Like my blood was on fire in my veins… But it’s gone now…” She breaths heavily for a moment before looking up at the sky, to the receding figure of Aylin, “We should head to Moonrise.”

“That’s all well and good, but how do you suggest we catch up to the one with wings?” Astarion gestures irritatedlyat the sky, you stifle an unexpected giggle;he does have a point.

“Indeed. And what of the others? How will they know to go there now?” Lae’zel looks down the road towards Moonrise.

“Something tells me they’ll know… I can feel it. The curse, it’s lighter. I think that Selune cleric will know what that means.” She smiles while looking up, something about her face seeming softer.

You rush down the road towards Moonrise, seeing Jaheira and her Harpers along with the others, save for Halsin, as they cross over the bridge, the curse no longer strong enough to stop them. Jaheira hails Lae’zel, telling her that Isobel sent them, that now is the time to strike, and having found you all on the road, it seems she was right.

Gale rushes over to Shadowheart, his scruffy face looking her over with concern, but she smiles and waves them away, insisting she’s fine, he’ll hear about it later. Wyll waves you all over to follow behind the Harpers as you catch up on what’s been happening. Karlach and Wyll tell of Halsin’s ritual to save the spirit of the forest here; it was a success, though the spirit looks like a young boy named Thaniel. So, Halsin is staying behind with Isobel to protect the inn and those that cannot fight. Wyll had a visit from his devil handler, Mizora, tasking him with finding something in the towers, or risk eternal damnation, or something, Karlach is hell bent on helping him. Lae’zel and Shadowheart do all the updating for your side of things. Astarion remains silent and you don’t think he wants to share what happened with Raphael, so you stay quiet as well. As they finish up the bridge to the tower becomes visible through the lessening shadows.

Your companions decide to hang back and let the Harpers handle storming Moonrise. You have already had a long day and you want to reserve your magic for whatever is yet to come. Wyll and Karlach are going to go in after the Harpers, just in case they need a bit of backup, they’ll come get the rest of you once the main floor is cleared. Gale and Shadowheart wish them luck before going to sit together by the bridge. Lae’zel nods before moving to kneel on the other side of the bridge, looking like she’s meditating. And Astarion makes a soft hmm noise before taking your hand and leading you over to a gnarled root to sit,

“You should eat something, my sweet.” He cups your face, smoothing your cheek with his thumb before pulling back to let you move.

“You’re probably right.” You smile up at him, rummaging through your pack and getting something to nibble on.

Astarion remains standing, idly fiddling with a dagger, seemingly lost in thought. When you finish eating you reach up and tug on his armor, wanting him to sit with you and let you lean into him. He wraps his arm around your shoulder, bringing you in close and pulls your braid forward so he can twirl the end around his fingers. You want to let him undo it and run his fingers through all of it, but know that wouldn’t be advisable now, instead you content yourself with his breath stirring the hair around your face and the comforting feeling of his arms around you. The sounds of hurried footsteps on the bridge bring this small moment to an end; it’s Karlach letting you know they’ve cleared the bottom two floors and that Jaheira is waiting for you to join them in going to the roof. It’s time to kill the General.

You’re feeling refreshed, having a little stretch as you follow everyone into the tower. Not even halfway across the bridge the bodies start, littered all over the floor, a bloody mess of cultists and a few Harpers. The other Harpers are checking the bodies for anything of value and gathering their fallen. Wyll waves Gale and Karlach over, they will be joining him and a few Harpers down in the dungeons to search for his dad and the Tieflings that were captured. You walk behind Lae’zel and Shadowheart to the stairs, Astarion follows close behind you, as you brace yourself for a fight.

Jaheira stands before a door leading to the roof, the moment everyone gathers she throws it open, and you rush out. The sounds of metal clashing against metal echos around you. Aylin is flying, swooping down and bludgeoning animated corpses. Ketheric is on an elevated altar, slouching, grasping his side, glaring at Aylin and when he sees your group he shouts down at you,

“What have you done to me?!”

“You are immortal no longer, General!” Jaheira is quick to answer.

“Impossible! You are thralls! You serve the absolute! You. Serve. ME!” His eyes fall on Astarion, the one who had spoken for you when you first went to the towers, “Bow, you dog. BOW!” And with that command you feel yourself compelled to obey.

Everyone one of you with the parasite drops to their knees, the compulsion overwhelming you. Your fingers dig into your scalp as you try to resist, you scream but you don’t know if any sound escapes you. Your body rejects this abomination ordering you to obey but you’re powerless to fight it. Struggling, clawing at yourself, unable to even look around you whenyou’re all thrown back, the Astral Prism flyingfrom you towards Ketheric,forcingan end to his hold on you all. Ketheric’s eyes alight on the Prism,followingits movements as it flies back into your hands, rage filling his voice,

“The Prism, you’ve had it all this time?! You will bow before me! And if you will not bow, you will break!” Astarion moves in front of you as Aylin lands before Ketheric, “YOU!”

“How good it is to see you again, Ketheric. At last, you’ve found a god-master that suits you, it seems.”

“Aylin. The thief. You stole Isobel from me, and now you think you’ll take my life in the bargain?”

“You dare to speak her name? After your crimes innumerable, you would evoke her before me?” Her eyes glow with radiant fury, her great sword held aloft.

“Enough! This ends here and now, at last.” And with that final say he charges Aylin.

Lae’zel is the first to move, running to aid Aylin in her battle against the General. Jaheira’s panther wild shape bursts forth and bounds up to add yet more pressure on Ketheric. Shadowheart takes care of the undead while Astarion gets atop a gargoyle to fire arrows. You spot another necromancer, rushing at her to keep her from adding corpses to the fight. The necromancer was unprepared for your flurry of attacks, using only your sword to reserve your magic for healing. Astarion and Shadowheart take out the undead quickly, leaving you free to cast protective barriers. You gather your magic, ready when a forceful blast of air bursts from Ketheric, knocking back his attackers,

“Enough! You must return to your prison!” His eyes burn into Aylinas she soars above him, the stone on his breastplate beginning to glow, “And my daughter must be reclaimed!”

“Your daughter?” Aylin freezes, “Isobel?”

Ketheric strikes, using Aylin’s momentary distraction to summon forth a colossal illithid tentacle. It bursts from one of the smaller towers, reaching up into the sky to smash Aylin down to Ketheric. His stone continuing to glow as the tentacle reaches down to him, vanishing them before slithering back down into the bowels of the towers.

Jaheira rushes to the shattered tower while you hurry to check on the others. Lae’zel took a few hits from the General’s hammer, and you get to healing her up, the voice of the guardian worming its way into your head, worrying about the size of the tentacle. You push him from your thoughts as you concentrate, Astarion makes his way over to you before you can move on to check Shadowheart and Jaheira for injuries,

“Let Shadowheart help with some of this, we don’t know what else is waiting for us. I don’t want you draining yourself now.”

“Don’t worry, I’m fine.Are you hurt?” You give him a reassuring smile, your hands reaching towards him to check, but he glares at you, “Sorry.” You pull your hands back and look down,“I’ll go ask her to finish up here.”

He stops you before you can turn away,

“Very good, my sweet.” He smiles down at you, caressing your face, then lets you go.

You make you way over to Shadowheart, asking if she can handle the healing for Jaheira and herself, she even offers to close up a gash on your arm you hadn’t noticed. While she does that Wyll, Karlach and Gale make it up to the roof, joining you all; informing everyone that they didn’t find Wyll’s father or whatever it is that Mizora wants him to recover.

Jaheira comes back from the shattered tower, letting everyone know that it looks like you can get down to wherever that tentacle came from. Astarion puts his hand on the back of your neck and gently guides you, following the otherstopeer down into the glistening, moist hole. Your stomach churns at the sight of it, your mind flashesbackto being on the mind flayership,that thing that started this whole mess. You really don’t want to go down there, but what choice have you got?

3.

You stare back up the hole you just slid out of, then turn to look at your companions, every one of them tensed, shoulders hunched, faces set in grimaces as they take in their surroundings. Your skin crawls as your feet sink ever so slightly into the fleshy floor and there’s a sickening thrum of an overwhelming force in the back of your brain. Everything about this place is wrong and you want nothing more than to get out. That damnable Guardian whispering at you, telling you how this is where the tadpoles are harvested, that this place is an illithid colony, where the Absolute dwells. Gods, you hate the way he invades your mind but it’s better than the way the Absolute feels. Again, you wonder why it insists on bothering only you instead of one of the others, someone who might be better suited to doing whatever it is that it wants from you all. The others’ voices break into your clouded head, they’re discussing what to do next. You just stand quietly, waiting for someone to tell you what to do.

You will be splitting into two groups. Wyll, Karlach and Shadowheart will look for Wyll’s father and help look for the asset Mizora needs recovered. Astarion, Gale, Lae’zel and you will look for Ketheric, then hopefully you’ll be able to meet back up, somehow… You start to walk after Gale and Lae’zel when Astarion grabs your arm, holing you back a moment,

“No wandering off.” His grip tightens, “I mean it.”

“Well, I wasn’t exactly planning on it,” You try to lighten your mood and his with a smile,but there’s something about how he’s looking at you,it’s not just him wanting you to stay close…There’s fear in his eyes.

“Every time, Talia…” He caresses your face, his thumb sliding across your lips, “Stay with me this time.”

“I will. I promise, I won’t wander off. I’ll stay with you.”

Lae’zel clicks her tongue impatiently at the two of you, Astarion strides towards the door with you following close behind.

A twisting branching hallway of wet flesh walls and squishy floors stretches on before you, the other group disappears around a bend and Lae’zel leads your group down another path, moving slowly, cautiously… Too slow for your liking, you’d rather get out of here as quickly as possible. You try to distract yourself by looking around; seeing the same displays of bones from the mausoleum scattered about, those strange walking brains wandering the halls, seemingly content to ignore you all, but none of your observations calm you.

Your painfully slow pace eventually brings you to a room that’s more like a slaughterhouse than anything else; a dead-eyed bugbear chopping and hacking awayat corpsesamid piles of dismembered bodies and viscera slick floors. Galegoes right up to it, looking it over while you move closer to Astarion, holding onto his arm, your mouth salivating with a need to retch. Gore never bothered you before, but this is something else entirely…

He moves your hand into his, giving you a reassuring squeeze. You close your eyes, attempting to calm yourself; your breath is shallow, you try to focus on taking longer deeper breaths, but something prods at your mind… Something familiar, softly whispering… Gently pulling at your mind’s periphery… You concentrate on it,opening your eyes,looking around the room,trying to place where you know it from when it slowly dawns on you… It’s that strange little brain thing that helped you back on the ship… It’s there, in a cage. Your feet start walkingtowards it when you’re stopped by your hand held in Astarion’s. You look over at him, tugging, tryingto get him to come with you, a silent plea with your eyes, and though he frowns he follows you over to the little cage. You whisper to him,

“I think this one helped me before. Back on the ship. Do you think you can open its cage for me?” You think it a small request but the look he gives is one of disgust.

“Are you serious?” It’s a hissed whisper in your ear and you nod, “But…It’s grotesque.”

“Please?” You go up on tiptoes, nuzzling at him, attempting to be cute, desperate to distract yourself from your current surroundings.

“Fine. But this thing better not try anything…” He gets to work while you crouch down by the cage.

With its cage opened in scurries out, calling out so that both you and Astarion can hear it,

“Oh, thank you, thank you! You are a good friend, no, more! Rescuer! We are free! Thank you, friend!” It stomps its little feet, “Oh! But perils remain, near and far, better to stay together. You and Us. We will remain with you.”

“You are very welcome, Us. And it would be nice to have your help again.” This strange little creature is oddly comforting to have in this place.

“Ask it if it knows about the general or the Absolute.” He leans over to whisper in your ear, looking down at the brain as though he’d like it to go away.

“What Absolute? The Absolute not care about Us and we do not care about the Absolute.” Its little voice echoing in your minds, sounding perturbed, not quite answering Astarion’s question.

“Well, that wasn’t very helpful.” His lip curls as he straightens back up and you give a little pout.

“Um… Us, will you be staying with me even after we leave this place?”

“Yes, friend, stay together.”

“Ok… I don’t know how walking around with a brain is going to go once we get out of here...” You’re not even sure the others will let Us stay given Astarion’s reaction thus far.

“We will not cause you any trouble, friend. We will project a different form that will cloak us from all but your closest acquaintances. You and your friends will see Us as we truly are. All others shall see a ‘kitty’, a small predator, indigenous to this world. They kitties can walk anywhere, and they are most cunning.”

“At least it knows of the superiority of cats.”

You sigh, giving him a little shoulder shove when Lae’zel walks over, looks down at Us and rolls her eyes as hard as she can before whispering,

“Really?” She stares at you, and you nod. She looks down at it again and then back up at you, “Is that the same one? Or have you adopted another?”

“The same one. Its name is Us.”

“Of course, it has a name…” She turns to leave as Gale makes his way over.

“What are you doing with that intellect devourer?” Gale looks at it with disgusted curiosity.

“Keeping it.” You smile triumphantly as Astarion pulls you along to follow Lae’zel, you look back over your shoulder to Gale as he continues to look at it, “I’ll tell you about Us later.”

“...Us?…” Gale mutters to himself and follows after everyone.

Us scurries ahead, saying it will lead the way to the Absolute. It doesn’t know of Ketheric, but Lae’zel believes they may be in the same place, so on you follow. Us eventually leads you into a large open cavernous room that drops off into a hazy abyss, an illithid lift awaiting any who wish to descend. You’re not in there long before Wyll, Karlach and Shadowheart enter.

They walk over to where your group stands, no others in tow. Wyll’s father has still not been found, but Karlach was happy to inform you all that the asset that Mizora needed recovered was Mizora herself; she had gotten herself captured and couldn’t escape, Karlach can hardly stop herself from cackling as Wyll and Shadowheart take over relaying the rest of the story. You stop listening, instead you concentrate on quieting your mind, the thrumming from before is growing louder and you just want it to stop. Karlach comes over to you, breaking your concentration, and looks down at Us, who has taken a spot by your feet,

“Another one to take back to camp?”

“Yup. This is Us.”

“That’s fucking gross cute. Can’t wait to see what Scratch and the baby will think.” She can’t stop snickering while looking down at the intellect devourer, and though she interrupted you, her easy smile and acceptance of Us lightens your mood, even if only for a moment.

You get pulled along by Astarion as everyone makes their way to the lift. Gale looks out into the open vastness and points out the fleet of Nautiloids, wondering aloud how many there are and what it could possibly mean. The platform jerks into motion carrying you all down into the green haze, then stops at the bottom, the voice of the guardian breaking into your mind again,

“We’ve found it. The Absolute is behind this door.”

Chapter 15

Chapter Text

1.

The flesh door opens, everyone quietly goes through, staying low and out of sight, you the last of them. There’s a raised platform where Ketheric and a few others talk, you’re too far away to hear much of anything, a few in your group continue to creep forward while you’d rather stay where you are… Something in your gut screams at you not to go, but Astarion urges you forward, and you follow him.

The others on the platform start to become clearer, Karlach growls the name Gortash, you recognize it and for some reason it makes you uneasy to see him. There’s a woman too, sitting atop a kneeling man, you don’t recognize either. Ketheric, Gortash and the woman bicker amongst themselves, the two new ones aiming most of their ire at Ketheric, who then moves to strike Gortash only to be stopped by the woman. They finish speaking, Gortashmoves to the far side of the platform, his voice booming and commanding as heraises his fist, something on his handbegins to glow,

“The edict of Bane.”

“The lash of Bhaal.” The pale womanstands beside him, her voice loud and clear as sheholds up a dagger with a glowing stone.

The misty pool behind them bubbles as great tentaclesbreak the surface,a massive brain,wearing a dark crown, emerges. It’s huge, pulsating and radiating that force of will the guardian protects you from, but even with its protection you can feel the worm wriggling in your head. Ketheric joins them, his own voice reluctant but powerful,

“The testament of Myrkul.” His glowing stone is added to the others.

The brain floats ominously, glowing red, shivering and the voice of the guardian reverberates in your head.

“An elder brain… one of the cruelest and most powerful creatures in existence, enslaved by mere mortals.”

Everyone of your companions looks back at you, for once having heard his voice, the guardian no longer speaking only to you. They remain silent, listening, thinking then turning their attention back to the elder brain. Gale stares, transfixed by it, his eyes focusing on the crown, like he’s hypnotized,

“Look at that crown. It radiates with power unlike anything I’ve ever seen… To have it… to hold… If only I could… But I can’t… This is it. I must do as Mystra commands.” He starts to stand but Karlach grabs him and yanks him back down.

“Would you knock it off? You’re not sacrificing yourself. I’m not gonna let you.” She keeps hold of his arm and glares at him, worry in her eyes.

“We will take care of this another way,” Shadowheart puts her hand over his, smiling gently, “Trust us.”

“I do trust you,” He looks back into Shadowheart’s eyeswith a wavering smile, “More than myself or even Mystra. I have no desire to end your life… We will find another way.”

It’s a tender moment between them, you had no real idea just how close they’d gotten, but you’re glad that their affection for each other is what’s stopping him from killing you all. You look away from them, back up to the platform, seeing the brain do something to the kneeling man. Wyll begins to move forward but stops himself, his body coiled like a spring, his hand wringing the hilt of his rapier as he groans,

“Shit, no! Father!”

Everyone crouches in tense anticipation, watching the elder brain reach out to Gortash, the woman and Wyll’s father, suddenly vanishing with them. Its voice invading your mind again, commanding its army to move on Baldur’s Gate. Ketheric stands alone on the platform, waiting, he knows you’re all there.

Your mind can no longer handle everything that is happening. What even is happening? Every moment in this place only brings more misery. You just wanted to be rid of this thing in your head and go home. You grip the back of Astarion’s leather armor, panic starting to shake your body,but he’s too focused on what's happening to notice. You chew the inside of your mouth,lookingat your companions and then back up to the platform. Astarion stands and you blindly follow him, the others walking ahead as you wonder if you’re going to have to fight Ketheric again. More of the cavern comes into view, there’smonsters on the other platforms and even further in you see Aylin, trapped once again in a soulcage. You know someone is speaking, but none of what’s being said sinks in, you’re too distraughtto listen. Too scared.

Karlach sprints forward, Lae’zel and Wyll hot on her tail. Shadowheart and Gale make a break for Aylin. Astarion lunges forward, out of your graspand runs towards one of the platforms, leavingyoutojust stand there, stock still,unsure where to even go. Your eyes drift from one platform to the next, finally landing on one far off to the left witha line ofundead. That’s where you can go, that’s something you can handle.

You run as fast as you can, the panic fueling your speed,and clamber up the sinew mesh ladder. You cast holy magic, turningthe undead allowing you topick them off one by one with your sword. Your arm burns from swinging it, your shieldarm begins to droop, buton you go untilthey’re all piles of bones again.

You look up to checkwhat’s happening. Shadowheart and Aylin have joined the others attacking Ketheric head on while Gale has joined Astarion on a high platform taking out a mind flayer and several intellect devourers. Even Us is helping attack them. You ready yourself to heal everyone up when there’s a sudden lull in the battle, the sounds of everyone fightingKetheric go quiet. The general says something, but you can’t quite make it out, you move closer,only hearing his last words,

“I am yours.” He throws open his arms and leans backwards, letting himself fall into a pit.

And from this pit comes a terrible voice. Deep and trembling with divine indignation,

“You dare end one who belongs to me?” The pit swirls with eerie green mist, “I am the smile of the cleansed skull. I am the regrets of those who remain, and the restlessness of those who are gone. I am the haunt of mausoleums, the god of graves and age, of dust and dusk.” Great bone hands grip the edge of the pit, dragging up the skeletal deity, “I am Myrkul, Lord of Bones, and you have slain my Chosen. But it is no matter. For I am Death. And I am not the end. I am a beginning” And so he looms, a god among mortals.

Youhave never felt such terror as you do looking upon this eternal harbinger of death. The very breath you draw feels tainted; no life can be sustained in His presence. He summons forth a great scythe, its blade fearsome as he swings it. You clench your jaw, watching it swipe passed everyone… but not Shadowheart… Your heart stops as you helplessly watch her double over clutching at her stomach.

Lae’zel runs to her side, trying to help her get away but there’s no clear opportunity. Aylin flies overhead while Karlach and Wyll rush in to distract the god. You gather your magic, trying to heal Shadowheart but nothing happens. You madly run to the mesh ladder, flinging yourself down, scrambling to get to where she and Lae’zel are, again trying to use your magic on her and again nothing happens.

You get below them, shouting, begging Lae’zel to drop Shadowheart down; you know it’s only going to make her injury worse, but you have to get her away from that monster. Lae’zel dangles her down as far as she can before letting go. Shadowheart drops, landing heavily on her feet and immediately going down to her knees, her hand reaching out to you so you can drag her away. You pull, both hands holding her limp arm, every step you take you try again and again to staunch the bleeding, but still nothing happens. This demon’s very presence denies healing, denies life and you can do nothing to save your friend.

You don’t know how far you drag her but your vision blurs with tears and your voice cracks from screaming at her to hold on when her voice finally breaks through to you,

“It’s working…” Her voice is weak,raspy and low.

“Shadowheart?!”

You stop and look down at her and the soft glow of your magic and hers finally working. You drop her arm and crouch down beside her, shooing her hand away so that you can concentrate on her wound. Your hands hover over her, feeling for the damage, willing her organs to be whole once more, her muscles to knit back together, for her skin to seal, not even a scratch is visible once you’re done.

Gale runs to where you sit with her, still unbelieving she’s OK,

“Get back to the others. I’ll stay with her, no further harm will come to her, I promise. Please, they need you there.”

“Go, Talia. I can handle the rest, thank you.”

“You’re sure?” She nods and you run back to the others, unsure what you can even do if you cannot heal them...

You reach the platform and climb up, hoping to be able to shield the others from further injury, but there’s no need. Aylin flies over and then swoops down on Myrkul, delivering the final blow. The god crumbles to green flames and smoke, leaving behind the battered body of Ketheric. He moves, kneeling, whinging about the impossibility of his defeat for he has domain over death, but then he finally sees… he has been forsaken by his god and the unlife he was granted is withdrawn.

As Ketheric collapses Aylingoes to the corpse, continuing her assault, desecrating his body, crushing his skull underfoot, all the while screaming at him. You leave her to her grim work, concentrating on healing your friends. Wyll, Karlach and Lae’zel are battered and bloodied, all requiring an immense amount of healing, draining what magic you had left.

Wearily you look up to see Astarion coming, you smile up at him, the strain and fatigue taking you, your whole body trembles and all you want is for him to hold you in his arms. But he can’t, not now… that damned guardian is in your heads again, you can see it written on Astarion’s face, he’s listening as it says to collect the stone from Ketheric’s armor. You push the voice from your head, you can see Gale stooping by the dead general to retrieve it, and no sooner is it in his hand than a portal opens up, the guardian himself striding through,

“Remarkable. Truly.” He looks down at the stonein Gale’s hand, “And now the picture comes together. The Absolute is neither god nor man. It is the elder brain you saw, held here by those three against its will. The crown it wears controls it, and these stones control the crown. It has been dominated. To master an elder brain… to subdue it… Our enemies are formidable.” The way it speaks, like it’s marveling at this whole fucked up situation.

He addressedeveryone but you cannotfathom what he means by “our enemies”. You came here because you were told you could be rid of this damned worm in your head. You didn’t come here to fight fucking Chosen or the fucking gods they serve. You just wanted to be able to return to Baldur’s Gate with Astarion to… To do what, exactly? You hadn’t ever actually thought about it until now. What would going back mean for both of you? Without the parasite he’d be reclaimed by Cazador… He’d be taken… Sacrificed. You look over to him as he talks with the guardian. You fight back tears, swallow your screams, and resign yourself… knowing you have no choice but to continue…

2.

You sit on the steps of the dais in the audience chamber, looking out at everything… The whole of the place has been taken over by the Harpers. They’ve brought the rest of the people from the inn; the Tieflings mingle in a small group just of themselves, Aylin and Isobel sit close together, holding each other while they talk with Gale and Shadowheart, Halsin sits with a strange looking boy, Scratch and the cub lay at their feet, even the weird skeleton man, Withers, is here speaking with Jaheira, Lae’zel, Wyll and Karlach. The room echos raucously with everyone’s raised voices, your head throbs, your stomach groans, you can’t remember the last time you ate or even how long this whole thing has taken. Is it still the same day? Is it the next morning? How are you even supposed to tell? Your nails dig painfully into your palms, threatening to break the skin when you hear his voice,

“What’s wrong,my sweet?”

“What am I doing here?” You slowly look up at his face.

“What do you mean by that?”

“I mean… look at them… all of them… and then… and then there’s me…” You take a shaky breath, trying to better explain yourself, “All of you are so different from me. They’re all warriors or soldiers or adventurers… You’re an immortal vampire who can kill as easily as I breath… and I’m…” you hide your face in your knees and mumble, “…I’m just some whore-”

“No!” Hecuts you off,gripingyour shoulders, shaking you, “Don’t eversay that. That’s not what you are. Not anymore,” His hands move to cup your face,staring into your eyes, raising you to your feet, “You’re so much more than that. You’re so much more to me…I want you by my side, always. So even if you don’t think you belong here, you belong with me. Wherever I go, whatever I do, you’ll be with me. You’re mine.”

“I’m yours.” You quietly agree before he kisses youand you push aside your fears of being helpless… useless.

“Now, let’s find somewhere I can have you all to myself. I have been deprived of you for long enough,” He says it as he nuzzles into his place, yourpulsethrumming beneath histeethas theygently grazeyour skin.

He pulls you along to the room you had shared before, and as soon as he shuts the door, he’s on you. His mouth ravenously kisses you, his hands making quick work of your armor and chainmail: the weight of everything falling away with them. Your own desire for him rises, your hands moving swiftly to strip away his leather armor, desperate to feel his skin on yours when there’s a great gurgling rumble from your stomach, ruining the amorous mood.

“Are you that hungry?” Exasperated frustration is heavily sighedintohis question,you nod, “Let’s get you fed. Stay put.”

He leaves, the door bangs loudly as he disappears behind it. You chew the inside of your mouth, fretting that you’ve upset him. He’s only gone a few minutes and when he returns its with bread, cheese and wine, of which he hands you the food while he sits and drinks from the bottle.

“I’m sorry…”

“Whatever for?”

“For… being hungry…”

“Don’t be. Now, hurry up and finish. I wish to resume our fun.”

“OK.” You smile brightly, relieved he’s not upset, then proceed to inhale your food like a half-starved animal.

He watches you, slowly sipping the wine then offering you the bottle once you’ve shoved the last bite into your mouth. Thirstily you gulp it down. With not even a moment to finish his hands are already on you, taking the bottle from you before you can drain it,

“Now, where were we?” That devious smile descends to your wine wet lips.

“About here I believe,” You breathe against him, your hands startingto work at his clothes again as hiswork at yours.

You continue to kiss, breaking away only to remove the next piece of clothing until everything is tossed to the side. He brings you into him, lifting you up so you wrap your legs around him. He backs you into the wall and easily slides into you, holding still for just a moment, reveling in how your body is always ready for him. The cold rough stone scrapes against your back as he begins to thrust up into you, his fingers gripping the soft flesh of your ass, your fingers tangling into his curls. Your head tips back so he can bring his fangs to your pulse and drink deeply as you gasp,

“More…”

He bites down harder, his hips slamming into you faster as you shiver into your climax. Your body has barely begun to stop quivering when he sets you down and turns you to face the wall. His hands grabbing you, arching your back, forcing you to go up on your toes, your cheek pressed to the wall, your fingers searching for purchase amongst the stone. He slips back into you, rolling his hips before he yanks on your braid, pulling you back by it, your arms pushing you off the wall, shaking with the strain of this contorted position, and it all feels so good…

His fangs bite down on your shoulder, letting your blood run down your back as you whimper,

“Harder…”

His fangs tear away,

“With pleasure, my sweet.” You can hear the smile as he pulls out of you.

He grabs a fistful of hair at the back of your head, moving you down to your knees, kissing you fiercely then laying you down, his body bearing down on you as you open your legs to him. He teases you, sliding up along your center, just grazing over your clit. You moan, your lips trembling with anticipation, you’re on the brink of begging when his cock finally pushes into you.

Hard and fast and relentless, his body answers yours with fervent ferocity. You cum again, your body squeezing and pulsing around him, crying out his name. He smiles down at you, his eyes gleaming with possessive pride, watching as you writhe beneath him. His lips come down to yours again as he follows you into oblivion.

You’ve never known such pleasure as he gives you: the torment of his teasing, the sharp intense sting of his fangs, the way he pulls your hair and makes your body bend to his whims, all of it, pure indulgence of your deepest darkest desires.And all of it brings on Her blessings, soothing any doubts you had about where you belong or what you need to do; you need only be with him.

You stay lying on the cold floor, your legs shaking as he caresses the bare skin he had just savaged. Soft kisses soothing his bite marks and bloody punctures. He had continued to avail himself of your blood, biting you all over your body, but only after he was satisfied with fucking you senseless. Your hand begins to move, softly glowing over his love marks, getting to most of them whenhe stops you,

“Leave a few…” His devilish smirkmakesyou flush, “I quite enjoy the look of them on you.”

“As you wish,” You give a smirk of your own, reaching up tobring his face down to yours for another kiss before he gets up.

“Now that I’ve had my way with you, let’s findsomemore suitable accommodations to retire to.” He helps you up and kisses one of the remaining bite marks, “I may even indulge myself again once we’re settled.”

3.

You wake, warmin a soft bed, dim sunlight filtering in through dirty windows and Astarion’s arms wrapped around you. You’re still surprised no one objected to him taking the general’s bedroom. Seems like Isobel claimed her old room with Aylin while Shadowheart and Gale took the bedroom attached to this one. You wonder how she’s doing aftereverything… the temple, the assimar, the betrayal of her goddess… very nearly dying… You want to go talk to her, check on her, make sure she’s alright. You gently start lifting Astarion’s arm up, slowly shimmying your shoulders, trying slip away…

“And where are you trying to sneak off to?”His voice is thick from just waking.

“Oh!Sorry…I was trying to not disturb you.” You roll over in his arms to look at him,“I wanted to see Shadowheart. So much happened,and I just want to see how she’s doing.”

“She has Gale to comfort her for now. You can see her when we go down for the meeting.” He tightens his hold on you, “Stay.”

“Of course, my love.” You snuggle back into his embrace and wait for the early morning to pass.

The audience chamber is packed with Harpers and your companions, the remaining Tieflings have already left, journeying on to Baldur’s Gate. Astarion stands beside you, waiting for Jaheira to start speaking while you look around. You spot Halsin sitting with the boy you saw yesterday and all three of the adopted four-legged pets. It looks like Us has been welcomed by Scratch and the cub, though you’re not sure how that worked out. You continue looking, searching for Shadowheart but you don’t spot her before Jaheira begins speaking.

She stands on the dais, addressing everyone, informing you all that the army Ketheric had assembled is now marching towards Baldur’s Gate, she wishes to move out as soon as possible, to help in whatever way they can. And with that she steps down, making ready with her Harpers while Astarion says you will need to discuss with your group what the next move for you should be. With everyone now shuffling around you spot Shadowheart… and her new hair. You run off before Astarion has a chance to say anything,

“What is this?” You smile, bringingher braid over her shoulder so you can admire it.

“Do you like it?” She blushes shyly, as thoughshe’s embarrassed by the new look.

“I do… But does this mean you’re a Selunite now?”You arch a brow at her.

“Yes, I think it does…” She laughs nervously, “As it turns out, I always was, or at least I was meant to be.” She looks at you, regret in her eyes, “I’m not an amnesiac orphan… I was stolen m my family during my coming-of-age ritual. The wolf I saw wasn’t trying to hurt me… it was trying to protect me… It was my father. The Mother Superior stole me to turn me from a Selunite to a Sharran…”

“Gods, Shadowheart…” You reach for her hand,holdingit tightly, “Why?”

“I don’t really know. But…that’s not the worst of it… My parents are still alive… And this mark, it’s linked to them. They’re being held captive… tortured… Their pain is my pain. That’s what this mark is…”

“Do you know where they are?”

“I think they’re back at the cloister in Baldur’s Gate. I need to rescue them,” She looks up at you with pleading eyes, “Will you help me?”

“You don’t even need to ask, of course I’ll help.” You hug her, embracing her tightly as she sighs with relief.

“Thank you, Talia.”

“Just promise me one thing,” You pull back, your hands on her shoulder as she looks at you with her eyebrows raised, “No proselytizing, all right?” You can’t help but giggle at her, “I’m not converting, you hear?”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” She giggles back, taking hold of your hand, leading you to join the others.

Astarion turns, watching the two of you approach, his eyes drifting down to your hand held tightly in Shadowheart’s, but he says nothing. You try paying attention to what’s being said, you don’t know where the discussion is at, or if anything has been decided on. You catch the Halsin will be staying to help with this giant brain problem, you’re excited for him to continue cooking, you’ve missed the food me makes. But other than that, it looks like everyone has something of dire import to do in the city so you will be leaving and traveling with the Harpers, they plan on leaving just after midday. You’re not looking forward to having to hit the road again so quickly, you’d have liked to rest after everything that happened here, but you know your opinion matters little in the face of everyone’s concerns. Instead, you comfort yourself with what Astarion told you, that you belong by his side, no matter what.

As everyone disperses to prepare for traveling you let go of Shadowheart so she can join Gale. As you turn to follow Astarion you notice Halsin smiling at you, you are curious about the mysterious boy he has with him and you step towards them, but Astarion puts his hand on your shoulder,

“We should get ready ourselves, come.”

“Oh, but I think Halsin wants to talk to me. I’ll be quick, promise.” you smile up at him and his eyes look over to the where Halsin stands with the boy, his large hand rising to wave at the two of you.

“I’ll join you, my sweet.”

“OK.” His hand grabs yours as you walk over to your smiling friend.

“Talia, I wanted you to meet Thaniel.”

“Hello, Thaniel.” You beam down at the boy with wooden horns and an aura like your childhood home.

“It is nice to meet you, Talia.” He speaks slowly, softly, looking up you, studying you, then turning to Halsin, whispering something that you can’t hear before he speaks to you again, “I am the spirit of these lands, and I want to thank you for your help in dispelling the shadow curse.” He bows his little head to you.

“I really didn’t do much. It was more Shadowheart, I think. She’s the one who freed Aylin.”

“But you helped her. And you helped defeat Ketheric.” His little face looks up at you in such earnest, its quite sweet.

“You helped a great deal, little flower, thank you.” Halsin’s gentle smile lights up his face.

Before you can respond Astarion speaks,

“She was a great help,” He looks down at you, a hungry glint in his eyes, his hand finding yours, griping tightly, “Now, if you’ll excuse us, we have a great many things to take care of before we must leave. Come, Talia.” He pulls you away as you look over your shoulder, smiling back at them, knowing you can always talk to him more later.

4.

You’ve had little time to speak with anyone while traveling, Astarion never leaves your side. When camp is finally being set up you wander over to Shadowheart and Karlach to see if they’ll be enjoying some much-needed drinks by the fire with dinner tonight. They will be, you’re excited to join them while Astarion goes on a hunt.

The tents are ready, Halsin is cooking as the animals keep close, waiting for their scraps and then their own bowls of dinner. You smile, shaking your head at how spoiled they are while ruffling the feathers on the cub’s head, his clawed paws wrapping around your arm playfully. Astarion sits with Scratch, patting his head and looking off into the distance. Shadowheart walks over, smiling with a bottle in hand and Karlach just behind her. They sit down with you, beginning to chatter about nothing in particular, waiting for Halsin to hand out dinner. When he finally does you expect Astarion to get up and go, but he doesn’t move, he stays, sitting close to you, drinking wine, watching you eat and laugh with the others. And when you finish, yawning with delayed exhaustion he offers you his hand and takes you to your tent.

“I’d have thought you’d go hunting now that we’re out of the shadow curse, my love.” You speak softly while changing for bed.

“I will go once you’re resting, my sweet.”

“Why so late? You could have gone while we were eating, if you’re hungry.”

“I am quite alright, you needn’t worry. I just wished to spend time with you,” He brings you into his arms, kissing the top of your head, “Now, time for you to go to bed, my darling.” He kisses your lips and waits for you to get into your bedroll before he goes out into the night.

He’s acting oddly, but then again, so is everyone else; they’re all anxious about reaching the city, even you. You’re excited to finally be going backhome, but the closer you get the more trepidation you feel. You think about being toldwho the other two were when you saw the elder brain, the Chosen of two moregods, Bhaal and Bane. It’s the thought of Bane that makes you squirm. You’ve had plenty of visits from his followers,they’re given special privileges at the temple and The Chateau; after all,your goddess is the consort of theirs. But it’s never been something you’ve thought too much about,until you saw Gortash, the Chosen of Bane, and the way he made your stomach lurch…

You wake in Astarion’s arms holding you close, his steady breathing stirring your loose hair. You snuggle back, pressing into him more, hoping he’ll wake in an amorous mood… He does. He noses down to your neck, his lips kissing your neck before biting down on your pulse, drinking deeply, his hand wandering down to find you wet and waiting.

His fingers slide up and down between your folds, circling your clit, then slip inside of you, eliciting a whimpered moan from your lips. He pulls back, letting you turn to him, your leg going over his hip, pulling him closer, feeling him hard for you, his lips going to yours, kissing you deeply. He rolls onto his back, bringing you with him, your hair cascading down around you like a curtain of crimson. You lift up enough for him to reach down, freeing himself, letting you settle back down onto him, never breaking your passionate kiss.

You straighten up, his hands grabbing your thighs as your hips begin to move, slowly rolling up and down, your body already trembling. He begins to move his hip, thrusting up, slow and hard, matching your rhythm, his dark eyes watching you stifle your cry of ecstasy, tightening around him, bringing him with you to sweet release.

He holds you close, smoothing your hair as you lay on top of him, breathing heavily. You stay for you don’t know how long, but he stops his hand, and his chest vibrates with his voice,

“We should get ready for the day, my sweet.”

“Must we?” You rub your face against his chest, his shirt bunching up as you slide your hands under it.

“Yes, we must.” His chuckle rumbling through him as he rolls you off and onto the bedroll.

You pout but do as he says, slowly piling on everything you must before packing up and preparing to take down the tent, your mind constantly drifting back to how sweet this morning had been. You go over to where Halsin has breakfast ready; a skillet filled with cheesy eggs and fire toasted bread to heap it onto, it is amazing as always. You eat like a child, too eager and impatient to wait for it to cool, you will just have to heal your mouth once you’re done. Halsin shakes his head at you as you walk away to help the others.

Every day of travelling goes much the same as the first; walk for what feels like an eternity, stop along the road to make camp, eat dinner, go to bed, wake up to do it all again. Five days of this, and through it all Astarion almost never leaves you side, and you fear he’s worried about going back and all it will mean for him. You do what you can to keep his mind off of it, spending every evening with him; playing cards, drinking with everyone, telling and listening to silly stories until you go to bed, and he goes to hunt, then spending every morning with him hungry for you and you just as hungry for him.

But tonight is different, tonight will be the last night spent on the road, tomorrow you will reach Wyrm’s Crossing. Camp is set along a cliff side looking onto the city, you stand, alone for once, looking out at it, the soft yellow glow of firelight illuminating pockets of the Baldur’s Gate. You close your eyes, wondering what tomorrow will bring when his arms wrap around you, his body leaning into you,

“We’ll be there soon… Closer to Cazador.” His embracetightens, “I’ll need to find out where this ritual is taking place. Which means I’ll need to find my ‘brothers and sisters’.”You can hear the sneer he has, the irritation palpable in his voice.

“Any ideas where they might be?”Your own voice is low, you hate hearing him like this; speaking about his past is only ever painful, and all you want to do is help him be free of it.

“So long as their orders haven’t changed, they’ll be in the taverns and flop houses of the city… hunting.”

“You wantme to helpyoulook for them? I’m happy to, my love.”You tip your head back, turning to nuzzle at his neck, attempting to sooth him.

“I know.”

You return to the fire; a bowl of dinner is left for you with Us standing guard over it. You thank them as you settle down to eat a very late dinner, Astarion had not wanted to be with the others and their raucous laughter, he was in too foul a mood for revelry. He sits with you in silence as you finish up. You put the bowl to the side and lay back by the fire, enjoying the warmth of it on your face while Astarion sits beside you, brooding.

Your eyes grow heavy as Astarion stands, saying you should get to bed, reaching down to help you up when suddenly a shocking pain rips through your head. Your body writhes on the floor, your fingers dig into your hair and pull as you curl into a ball, screaming. The voice of the Absolute forces all other thoughts from your mind, all you can hear it its command to gather… to transform… to obey…

The sudden compulsion abates as the Astral Prism hovers near your shakingbody, the Guardianbeggingfor help as a portal opens up and Githyankiwarriors jump through.Astarion rips you up from the floor, shouting for everyone to help. Thankfully not everyone had been asleep, but no one was prepared to be attacked. You throw up some protection onto Lae’zel and Karlach, the first of you to respond with weapons in hand. You’re only in a tunic and boots, frantically you look around for your shield as more of your companions appear. The voice of the Guardian grows more desperate as everyone tries to fight their way to the portal.

Chapter 16

Chapter Text

1.

Shadowheart comes running towards you with her shield and mace, tossing you theshield while she brandishes the mace, the both of you running towards the portal. Wyll joins Karlach and Lae’zel in the fight, you focus on getting protection onto him as well, no one is wearing armor. Gale blasts the Gith with magic as Astarion fires off arrows, finally felling the last of the invaders. You all run through the portal as the guardian continues pleading for help.

You emerge into the familiar scenery of the astral plane; vast and strangely beautiful, an impossibly gargantuan skull drifting amongst the floating islands and the voice beckoning you to get to the skull.

There’s only two more Githyanki fighters blocking your way, but with everyone fighting together they stand no chance and are quickly killed. You continue running, leaping effortlessly from rock to rock, descending onto the skull. But once you arrive you find intellect devourers and a mind flayer fighting more Githyanki. The mind flayer gets knocked back, falling prone at the feet of Karlach and Lae’zel, the Gith who attacked it making a quick retreat when seeing it may be forced to face all of you. Everyone looks down at the monster as it holds out a hand and speaks,

“Before you do anything, I am your ally. We are in danger.” The voice is different, but you recognize it all the same, it’s the impossibly perfect guardian, showing its true form at last.

“Another tentacled freak? What in the hells is this?” Astarion shouts, disbelieving what it says.

“The Githyanki is the source of our protection against The Absolute.” It points towards a bound Gith farther down the path, “I MUST subdue him, or everything we’ve worked towards is lost. Don’t let my form deceive you. I am the one that’s been protecting you. I am the one that came to you in your dreams. Help me. You must destroy the guard. They prevent me from subduing their master.” It pleads from the ground as everyone looks on in confusion, disgust or mistrust.

“Aid an illithid against Githyanki? We cannot, we must not!” Lae’zel seethes with anger as she looksdownupon it.

“Your blind loyalty will be your undoing, Lae’zel. Fight with me. For your own survival.” You can hear an edge to its words, it has no time for explanations or coddling feelings.

“Come on, let’s just do this! We’ll figure it out later!” Karlach shouts as she runs passedthe mind flayer and towards the Githyankistill fighting the devourers.

Lae’zel glares at it as she runs to catch up with Karlach, Wyll and Shadowheart following quickly behind. You stay back with Gale and Astarion, armed with only a shield you focus on healing and protecting while the boys provide supporting attacks and cover fire. Shadowheart does what she can to help with healing as she fights but can’t keep up with the ferocity of these warriors. These Gith are more formidable than the ones you remember fighting at the creche; they’re more agile, seemingly able to evade more than be struck by your friends’ attacks. Astarion runs out of arrows and runs to join the fray.

The moment he’s gone one of the Gith jumps up to where you and Gale stand, nearly defenseless. You stand between them and Gale, holding up your shield, hoping Gale can do something from behind you, but you’re scared he will catch you in the crossfire at this range, and you cannot risk moving to the side, lest they attack him instead. The guardian mind flayer comes to your aid, launching a boulder at your attacker, knocking them far enough away that Gale can cast his magic. You don’t want to thank the disgusting creature, so you just nod acknowledgment of their help.

Slowly you and Gale make your way closer as more of the Githyanki are defeated. You concentrate on healing as the last remaining Githyanki fighter falls at the feet of the captive Gith. That one’s eyes glare menacingly at all of you, rage clearly the only thing he feels at seeing you killing his people and helping the illithid that now hovers beside him. The captive struggles briefly against his bonds before the mind flayer subdues him, his body going limp as his eyes roll back into his head.

You stand behind Astarion, clutching the back of his shirt, the adrenaline from battle wearing off and your body beginning to shake with exhaustion as you eye the monster with mild contempt. Everyone gathers around, looking intently at the mind flayer, waiting…

“Don’t look at me like that. I am a mind flayer, yes. Without me you would all be slaves to The Absolute.” The audacity of this thing to soundsoindignant at everyone’s stares.

“It’s obscene. To owe my life to a damned ghaik.” Lae’zel spits her words towards it, “No more lies. No more tricks. I will have answers!”

“Very well. I was someone once. Someone just like you,” You roll your eyes at that buttrylisten anyway.

It goes on to tell of its life before, how it was from Baldur’s Gate, was taken and made into a mind flayer. How it was enslaved by the elder brain, The Absolute as you know it now, before gaining freedom from it. Living a life in the shadows,butmeeting Duke Stelmane changed everything. It grew powerful in the underground of the city, even being called The Emperor, such was its influence. Thenthat life was destroyed by Gortash, and it became a thrall to The Absolute once more, until it was sent out to find the Astral Prism. Upon finding the prism the Emperor was freed from bondage due to what, or rather who was inside: the Githyanki price, Orpheus. At that Lae’zel scoffs, saying that Orpheus was slain long ago. But that is indeed who’s there, for only he had the power to disrupt the hive mind control of elder brains. And that it was Vlaakith who imprisoned him here, she needed to keep him alive, keep his power in order to maintain her own.

It keeps talking, everyone asking questions, and you stand there silent as the grave. Your stomach feels queasy at the mention of Gortash. Your heart beats wildly, uncontrollably as the mind flayer beseeches everyone for aid in killing the other Chosen and destroying the elder brain. Your mind reels as you try to imagine yourself fighting these avatars of gods and The Absolute, a thing that may as well be a god, as the cultists believed, for how powerful it is. All you can think is how you’ll only get in the way and end up getting everyone killed, yourself included. You’re incapable of helping in this and you know it…

And then it says that in order to do anything of the sort you must all embrace the power and potential of your tadpoles… You must “evolve”… You must partially surrender your body to becoming part illithid… Astarion stiffens at that, his face growing cold and dark as he reaches back to grab your hand in a crushing grip; he’s shaking. All you do now is look up at him, tears blurring your vision as you wait for him to take you away from this gods damned place.

Heleadsyou out through the portal, back to camp and straight to your tent,growling out his words once you’re inside,

“To think that we owe our lack of tentacles to one of the very same monsters!And now it offers us more power if we’re willing to…evolve…” His back is to you, your hand still gripped in his as he falls silent.

“Astarion?”You meekly call out to him, but he doesn’t hear you.

“I had thought to use these powers to my advantage against Cazador. And now, to find that that THING had been manipulating us, ME, into depending on those same abilities so that we’d be open to this next step? I’m not doing it. No matter what power it would bring.” He’s trembling,almost crying. He releases your hand to look at you, holding your arms, “I had nothing for so long… Not even my own body. I will not give it up, now that it’s mine again.”

“My love, no one is saying to listen to that thing.” You reach up to hold his face, his hands still gripping your arms,“Why would you-” He shouts at you, cutting off your words, your hands freezing in the air as you flinch.

“Because I need every available advantage to kill Cazador!” His fingers dig into you, “Even without him being able to compel me he’s near impossible to defeat!” He softens his hold on you taking several deep breaths, “I told you how it felt… how it hurt… when I turned into a vampire… I don’t want to turn into anything else. I can’t watch my body be taken over again. Not by Cazador and certainly not by this damned worm in my head.”

You don’t know what more you could say, so you do the only thing you can think of; you reach up over his shoulders and hug him close. You want him to know that you’re here for him, that he never needs to fear you suggesting he do anything he doesn’t want to. You only want him to be safe and happy, whatever it takes. He returns your embrace, burying his face in your neck and staying there a long moment, letting his rage and fear drain away. He calms himself and pulls back away from you to kiss you softly,

“Thank you, my sweet…” He leans his forehead against yours, “We should get some rest…”

“Of course, my love.”

You release your holds on each other just enough to crawl into your bed roll where you curl up and drift away, locked tight in each other’s arms.

2.

The camp bustles with everyone packing up and preparing to finally enter the city but you and Astarion are still abed holding tightly to one another. He still looks sad, dejected even, as he smooths your hair and stares at you. And then without a word he stands and begins to get dressed, you silently joining him. You emerge to see the Harpers already on the march, Jaheira speaking with Lae’zel and Wyll before she runs off to catch up to her people. Shadowheart sits by the fire with Halsin, waving you over, a bright smile on her face. You go to walk over, but Astarion stops you, wrapping his arm around your shoulders before walking you over to them.

“Shadowheart was telling me about what happened last night. Are you alright, little flower?” Halsin’s ever gentle smile creases his face as he hands you a bowl of porridge drizzled with honey.

Astarion’s grip tightens on you and before you can answer he does,

“We are just fine.”

Shadowheart arches a brow at you, her eyes going between you and Astarion, Halsin looks like he wishes to say more so you smile warmly and nod in agreement, hungrily shoveling your breakfast into your mouth. Before either can ask more of you the others gather round, loudly discussing what the next step is. Each has their own worries to attend to, but you’re only interested in helping Shadowheart and Astarion and getting home to tell Ana all about everything. For now, everyone will stay together until getting through Wyrm’s Crossing and into the city proper. You’ve finished eating by the time the plan is settled and so you go back to your tent to pack up and head out.

Astarion holds your hand the entire walk to the village, Rivington, a place you had only been to once before when you first came to Baldur’s Gate. You remember almost nothing of it, you had never left the city once you moved here, so there was never a need to come back to this quaint place. The road leading down gives a marvelous view of the twisting paths bustling with so many people. Odd, you don’t remember it being this populated, it almost looks like low town on festival days, but there’s no sounds of revelry, no stalls of overpriced trinkets, no food vendors smelling of exotic delights… it’s just…

You’re pulled from your thoughts by the small voice of a little girl on the side of the road,

“Erm. ‘Scuse me.” You stop and look over at her, your hand held in Astarion’s stopping him as well, and she continues, “I can’t find my mum.”

“Oh… I’m sorry…” You’re unsure what to say to the little girl, but looking at her reminds you of yourself when you were maybe ten years old; this girl also being red of hair with freckles and mismatched eyes.

As you go to say more Halsin and Karlach walk up to the three of you, Scratch sniffing the air tentatively around the little girl and the fluffy ginger cat cowering behind her.

“Well, Let’s see if we can help you, kiddo. How about we start with a name, yeah?” Karlach gives the girl a sweet, concerned look.

The little girl’s face lights up as she excitedly begins to talk,

“Yenna! And my cat is Grub. He’s shy. I’m not. My mum is called Emery.” But after saying her mother’s name her voice gets lower, and her face looks worried, sad, “She went to go get some herbs for her spots. She was sick. And she was supposed to come back the same day. That was last tenday though.” She grips the bottom of her shirt, pulling on it anxiously.

“You poor thing.” Karlach looks around and then shakes her head, “Here, take this,” She grabs a leather pouch and drops it into the girl’s hand.

“And this, child.” Halsin kneels down to be eye level with the girl and holds out an open sack with fruits and vegetables inside, “This should see you through the next few days or so.”

“Oh wow! Thank you!” She beams at both of them, “Mum loved food like this. ‘Simple is best,’ she always said. I’ll, erm, I’ll look for her. I think she’ll probably come soon. Thanks again.” She clutches the bags close to her chest and walks down the path, the little cat close behind.

“Poor thing.” Karlach looks out towards the village and frowns, “I don’t know what’s going on, but that’s a lot of people just standing around,”

You continue down the path and see makeshift tents scattered about the village’s edge, each having several distraught people huddled around them; they’re all refugees… Not much further in and you hear the grumblings of the residents about how the city isn’t taking care of these ‘vagrants’ and that the crossing has been closed, no one is being let into the city. Lae’zel stops abruptly at the fork in the main road and grumbles,

“This is a problem. I must get inside.”

“So must we all, Lae’zel, each for our own reasons. But you are right, this is a problem.” Gale points out the obvious.

“What is even going on here? This isn’t how the city should be handling this situation.” Wyll shakes his head, dismayed by all the forlorn people he sees crowded into the village.

“Maybe we should split up and see what we can find out? I need to look around here first anyway.” Shadowheart looks over to you smiling knowingly, “I’m hoping someone will recognize me and tell me what I need to know.”

“I call Shadowheart’s group!” You shuffle over to her side, pulling Astarion along with you.

You stay close to her while everyone figures which group to be in and which way each will go. Gale will be joining the three of you while the rest will take the little menagerie of four-legged friends. Shadowheart veers off to the right, down the hill and into what looks like more refugees while the others head left towards the main road shops. You will all meet back up by sundown over where the little girl had stopped you on the road.

You don’t get far before a dark-haired man catches Shadowheart’s eye, he signals her over. She shakes her head when you move to follow her, she wants everyone to stay back a little ways, the man may not be forthcoming if there’s an audience. You wait anxiously for her to finish, Gale seemingly just as impatient as you for he stands with his arms crossed, huffing loudly every few breaths.

She returns, a grim look on her face as she tells you of what he said; she is now seen as an enemy, a traitor, her way will be barred, but if she chooses to continue this fool’s errand, then she’s welcome to go to the cloister and face the Mother Superior to free her parents. Shadowheart looks at you and Gale with pleading, fearful eyes, she knows it’s a lot to ask of you both, but there’s nothing you wouldn’t do for your friend, and you reassure her you will be there with her, every step of the way. Gale echoing your sentiments, hugging her close as he does.

The further down the path you go the more squalid the encampments become. The ground is slick with mud and littered with waste, the smell becoming almost unbearable. Astarion stops you, saying to let them go snooping in the gutters if they wish. You shrug at Shadowheart as she shakes her head and continues around the bend, you’re mildly thankful to not be going down there so you whisper a thank you to your love and he kisses your hand.

They return with news; they saw the Tieflings from the grove here, well, at least what’s left of them. They were at least able to tell why the crossing is closed, there’s to be a grand ceremony for something and in order to keep the peace the city has stopped allowing anyone through until it’s over; the citizens having been in an uproar about the number of refugees flooding in and causing problems. There’s even some new kind of machine helping the guards at the bridge. Gale is intrigued and wishes to go look at it, Astarion wonders why you cannot simply bribe your way inside, that’s always worked before…

You approach the bridge from the side road and see why you won’t be bribing your way inside; that metal monstrosity is why.Walking a little closer only confirms it, there’s no way passed that thing. You watch in terror as another group of people try to get in but are unceremoniously turned away, one of them not taking kindly to that, turns and makes a run for it only for the metal guard to raise its arm, a terribly large sword grasped in its hand. It holds for a moment shouting for the man to halt, but when he doesn’t that sword smashes down on him, ending his attempt. And then the thing goes right back to standing guard as though there wasn’t a bloody mess beside it, the helmet on top slowly surveying it’s surroundings. As the helm looks in your direction your stomach clenches and you feel sick,

“Does anyone else feel like that thing is looking right at them? Because I do… I don’t like this. Please, can we go?” You clutch at Astarion and start to back away.

“Yeah… Come one, let’s get out of here. I don’t like the look of it any more than you do,” Shadowheart scrunches up her face and recoils back, “We should inform the others… if they haven’t already seen this frightening automaton for themselves.”

You hurry back the way you came, too scared to risk walking passed that thing to get to the main road. You continue to shake, something about that thing truly set your teeth on edge and even Astarion’s arm around you does nothing to calm you. Once back at the rendezvous you sit on a toppled log and bury your face in Astarion’s chest while Shadowheart and Gale talk quietly.

“What’s wrong? Why has that thing frightened you so?” He smooths down your hair as you calm down enough to just sit, leaning against him, holding his hand.

“I don’t know… There was just something about it… I can’t explain... It just felt… wrong.”

The others return before dusk. Halsin comes over to you and sets the animals free while he starts a fire. Astarion stands to join Shadowheart and Gale in discussion with the others. You need to walk, breath, something to get your mind to clear, to get your heart to stop racing. You tell Astarion you’ll be just at the edge of the forest, you won’t go far, he tells you to bring Scratch or Us with you. You smile and shake your head at his concern and call for Scratch, Us is busily scurrying down the path doing… something, you don’t know what. What do intellect devourers do with no hive mind controlling them? You shrug and walk away with Scratch at your side, your hand resting on the top of his soft head.

You toss a sick for him to fetch. The repetitive motion and happy barks and pants lighten your mood and calm your nerves. You take a break, crouching down to give his head proper petting when he suddenly barks and moves behind you. You stand, turning to look and see the girl from before,

“Erm. Hi. It’s me. Yenna. You remember me, right?”

“Yes, of course. Hi, Yenna.” Scratch stays beside you, sniffing the air.

“Erm…" She looks nervously down at her feet, gripping her shirt and pulling it down before finally looking back up at you, “You guys were all really nice to me before. And erm. My mum hasn’t come back yet. She might come back later…” Her eyes go all teary, you can tell she’s trying desperately to be brave and to not cry, “I don’t think she’s coming. Could we maybe stay here?”

“Of course,” You step closer to her, putting your hand on her shoulder, peering into her face, smiling warmly at this poor lost girl, “Of course, you can stay.”

“YES! You’ve got a fire and everything. And I can cook really good!” Her face lights up, giving you the biggest of excited grins.

“Can you, now? Well, I like the sounds of that.” You stand back up, smiling even wider now.

“Whatever you want, I can make it! Oh! Thank you! Thank you!”

“Scratch, introduce out new helper to Halsin. I think he’ll be glad of an extra pair of hands to help with all the cooking he does.”

Scratch stomps his paws excitedly, circling the girl and her cat once before rushing off with them back to the camp.

“That was unexpected of you, my sweet.” His voice catches you by surprise.

“Oh! Well…how could I turn her away after she offered to cook?” You walk over to him and bring your arms up over his shoulders so you can have a quick kiss, “How long were you lurking there watching me?”

“Long enough.” He returns the kiss, “And why did you send your little escort away?”

“Oh… Uh… Sorry… I didn’t mean to; I wasn’t going to be gone much longer.”

“I really do need to keep aclosereye on you. You have a penchant for wandering off…”

“I wasn’t wandering off. I told you where I was going.”

“Not good enough,” He leans down, kissing your neck before biting, drinking just a little, “Let’s get you back, I believe your dinner is ready.”

You walk back hand in hand and sit by the fire. Yenna is already hard at work, handing out plates of food and fussing at the animals’ dinner, her little ginger cat underfoot the entire time. It’s a wonder that cat doesn’t get stepped on, but both must be accustomed to this way of moving around. Drinks and food are shared as everyone gets to know the newest member of the group. Before you finish and head to bed Karlach ambushes you, standing tall over your still sitting self and makes a demand,

“Tomorrow, you, me and grumpy over here are going out together.” She gestures at you, herself and Lae’zel with her head and thumb, a giant grin plastered on her face.

“I am not grumpy.” Lae’zel’s only contribution to this conversation.

“Sure, you’re not.” She laughs over her shoulder then looks back down at you, “So, you’re coming, right?”

“Where are we going? And what are we doing?”

“Uh… It’s a surprise. And, uh, it’s a surprise.” All she does in nod exaggeratedly.

“That’s not helpful!” Her mirth is contagious, and you begin to giggle with her.

“Who else will be going?” Astarion looks up at her as though he had plans, but he hadn’t said anything to you as of yet.

“Just us three. Wyll’s roped Shadowheart into investigating that murder over at the temple, Halsin will be doing whatever it is that he does all day here in camp,”

“I heard that!” He laughs heartily, “I don’t just sit around you know. Don’t listen to them, Yenna. Being the one in charge of the food is an important and integral part of any traveling group.” He winks and she giggles.

“And that just leaves you and the bookworm to entertain yourselves while we take take her out.”

“I do have some good books to get back to. A day of respite and reading sounds glorious after all that we’ve been through.” Gale sighs, almost dreamily at the prospect of being allowed to relax for once.

“I suppose I can spare your company for one day, my sweet.” He gives you an indulgent smile while you shake your head at him and nudge him with your shoulder.

“OK, I’m excited! What kind of surprise is it?” You clap your hands like a giddy fool, your mind filling with possibilities.

“I said it’s a surprise! So let it be a surprise, will ya?!” Her booming cackle echos in the forest as you laugh with her.

3.

You wake with the sun, eager to find out what your surprise will be, but when you try to wriggle out of Astarion’s arms he holds you tighter,

“They won’t be up yet, my sweet. Stay.”

“But I’m too excited to just lay here.”

“Who said you just have to lay here?” His lips spread into a wolfish grin as he rolls on top of you, pinning your wrists above your head and kissing you fiercely.

You immediately give in to his touch and let him drink deeply while he has his way with you. It isn’t until you can smell breakfast that he releases you from his tortuous grasp. He gets up, leaving you a panting mess on the bedroll, trying in vain to collect yourself enough to function. He chuckles softly, teasing you that all the food will be gone if you don’t get moving. That is motivation enough, you roll over and push yourself up and throw on your tunic dress and boots, leaving your hair down, but brushing it so it shimmers and shines in the sunlight. Astarion runs his fingers through it as you make your way to the fire.

Little Yenna has made good on her promise and has made a feast for everyone, with Halsin’s help, she’s never cooked for some many. There’re eggs with warm bread, from the bakery, sausages and bacon, even slices of apples and sweet berries in cream. Your mouth waters as Karlach elbows passed you to get to it all first, you’re tempted to grab her by the tail to stop her, but you know she’d only drag you along. You eat and laugh with everyone. Shadowheart and Wyll are the first to leave on their self-imposed mission. Gale stands to fetch his books and some fine wine he procured yesterday, offering Astarion a place with him by the trees for a spot of reading and drinking; he accepts, kissing you before rising and walking away with Gale. That leaves you with the ladies and their surprise. Karlach just giggles while Lae’zel stands, saying it’s time to go.

You follow them into the village, down the main road and into a shop you never thought you would have need of, a weapon and armor shop. You’ve don’t recall ever even setting foot inside one before. You look at them confused, Karlach laughs as Lae’zel explains,

“We thought it best you be properly armed and armored for what is to come. You have more than proven yourself a not incapable fighter,” She pauses to smirk at you, “and an invaluable healer. We wished to show you that by bringing you here.” She gives the warmest smile you’ve ever seen from her.

“Thank you… I…”

“Aww, grumpy, you’re gonna make her cry.”

“Shut up!” you say in unison and laugh.

Your commotion catches the attention of the shopkeeper, a lovely golden Dragonborn, who’s more than happy to chat your ear off about all the wares and the blacksmith who crafts them. You admit to having no real idea what you’re looking for and leave most of it up to Lae’zel and Karlach to explain what you’re looking for. Lae’zel starts getting very detail oriented so you and Karlach drift over to a display, admiring the fine intricate details on a shield.

“Excuse me, my Lady,” You hear someone talking behind you but assume they’re speaking to some other customer, and you continue to browse.

“Hey,” Karlach elbows you gently, when you look at her, she tilts her head to a man standing behind you, “You know this guy?”

Youturn tolook at him;you’ve never seen him before. You’re about to shake your head when he speaks again,

“Please, my Lady, your presence has been requested by Lord Gortash. If you would come with me back to Wyrm’s Rock,” He bows slightly before gesturing with his arm to walk ahead of him.

“I’m sorry, but you must have me confused with someone else. I’m no Lady.” You shake your head, stepping back as you feel Lae’zel come up to your other side.

“There’s no confusion, I assure you, Lady Talia. I have been sent to fetch you to my Lord Gortash.” He looks over at Karlach and Lae’zel, “Of course your attendants may accompany you.”

“What the fuck does ‘Lord’ Gortash want with her?” Karlach tips her head back, gesturing at you as she looms over the man, “Since when is he a ‘Lord’anyway?”

“It is not my place to question His orders, simply to carry them out. Now, please,come with me,” He’s unbothered by Karlach’s imposing stance,andjust calmly walks over to the doorwhereyou see oneof those metal things waiting outside, “We need not make a scene.”

You look to your friends, their faces reflecting your own confusion. It’s probably best to follow the man, though Karlach and Lae’zel are dressed for battle, you are not, and you fear what that thing outside is capable of; they didn’t see what you saw yesterday. They were told of it surely, but would they risk it? You decide to simply do as he asked and follow him outside; your friends close behind as they whisper to each other.

He leads you down the road, across the bridge, passed the other guards and into the fortress. The place is full of patriars, attendants, soldiers and so very many more of those metal monstrosities. You follow him up the stairs to the grand audience chamber, passed the gawking faces of onlookers, up more stairs onto the ramparts and finally to Lord Gortash’s private rooms, where there’s more of those metal guards standing on either side of every door. It’s here that the man tells you to wait while he goes to announce your arrival. And so, you wait in tense silence, too nervous to sit and too scared to move. You chew viciously on the inside of your mouth while your friends stand beside you, anxiously eyeing the automatons by the doors. Just when you feel like you’re about to chew through your lip you hear footsteps coming closer with a loud and commanding voice, echoing in the room as he speaks,

“Ah, my consort, you havearrived at last.” His dark eyes focus on you,a small smile curlingthe corners of his cruel mouth.

Your brows furrow as you look at him, your stomach beginning to knot in on itself. Karlach looks from you to him,

“What the fuck are you on about?”

“I wasn’t addressing you, Karlach.” He points at her with a gauntleted hand, a familiar stone shimmering on it, his eyes never leaving you,“But, in the interest of being cordial, your companion here is to whom I’m referring.” He waves that same hand at you, gesturing to the whole of your body.

“Yeah, no, what Karlach said. What the fuck are you talking about?” You take a step back from him, your heart starting to thunder in your chest.

“How very vexing. You weren’t informed earlier it seems. No matter, come with me, there’s much to discuss.” He turns to the side, still holding out that mailed hand towardsyou expectantly.

“No!” You recoil further, wanting desperately to leave this place.

“Your Lord commands it…” His voice grows low, impatient and threatening.

You stomach lurches as the world starts tilting. There’s a competing compulsion and revulsion to obeying his command, a sickly, malformed imitation of the pull you feel towards Astarion, a perversion of everything that draws you to Astarion is in this man standing before you.

“I said NO!” It takes every ounce of your will power to force those words out.

“I’m going to fucking kill him!” Karlach hunches down as if ready to tackle him.

“Hold your bloodlust Karlach! We’d never make it if we were to fight our way outof here,” She holds a hand out in front of her to stoppingher.

“It seems we’re at an impasse. I require you to follow me and you will not listen. You clearly need to be told of your purpose in this life. Of your divinely ordained destiny at my side,” He is utterly unfazed by Karlach and Lae’zel, and you stare at him, trembling at his words, “Go then to your Truescar. Learn from her as to whom you truly belong.”

Chapter 17

Chapter Text

1.

You sit in anxious silence, jostled by the bumpy carriage ride,squeezed tightly betweenKarlach and Lae’zel, but comforted by Karlach’s hulking muscles and Lae’zel’s stern ferocity as they stare menacingly at the man seated across from you. Lord Gortash had instructed this man to take you to The Chateau and then return you to him. Karlach and Lae’zel refused to let him take you anywhere without them, and you’re so very thankful to have them with you now. You wrack your mind, trying desperately to understand that sick feeling Gortash gave you, why it felt so familiar and revolting at the same time… What could your Truescar possibly know about this?

The carriage slows to a stop, waiting for the gates of The Chateau to open, you hear the clanking of metal and the hinges groaning open, the carriage lurching forward again as you await the end of this tortuous ride. The footman opens the door, offering a hand to help you out but you refuse it, instead taking the hand of the temple initiate that stands on the other side of you; a familiar face that looks tense and drawn, their eyes drifting to where you see more of the metal guards lined up along the grounds… inside the gates. They remain silent as you move to give space for your friends to exit followed by the man. None of you speak as you hurry to the door and are ushered into the foyer.

The man stands by the door while you guide Karlach and Lae’zel to a window alcove with a plush bench to sit and wait. You look around this wonderfully familiar room, the doors that lead to the pleasure rooms on one side the doors on the other leading to the private quarters of the Paramours… your room… Ana’s room… Her door is ajar, your stand and walk over to it, hoping, wishing, praying she’s there. You see fingers wrapped around the door, her eyes peering out at you, you reach out, ready to call her name, tears in your eyes and then she slams the door before you can get to her…

Your teeth find their way to your lip and bite down, a hand on your shoulder turns you around to face them; it’s Mistress Raven. Her eyes are teary like yours, but she doesn’t say a word, instead she holds your shoulders gently and guides you to the stairs leading down to Davora’s office, the Truescar and Madam of your home.

You step into her office and see her standing at the far end behind her desk, looking upon a statue of Loviatar, her back to you as she speaks,

“It is good to confirm your survival, Talia,” She sighs heavily, turning to face you as you walk closer, “There is much I must tell you. I only wish it had been under… better circumstances,” The few wrinkles around her eyes seem to have deepened since last you saw her, her once proud Dwarven stature somehow diminished, “Please, sit.” She holds out her hand to the two armchairs by the fireplace, her short legs moving swiftly despite her haggard appearance.

“Please, Davora, what’s going on? Why are there those metal monsters all over the place here? Why’s Ana ignoring me? Why-” You bombard her as you make your way to a chair; she silences you with a raised hand before sitting down and urging you to do the same.

“I had meant to tell all of this to you soon, but with your disappearance and everything that has happened here in the interim, it has changed my plans,” You open your mouth to speak again, but she gives you a stern look before softening it and continuing, “I suppose I should start with your mother, with Layla, the previous Chosen of our Maiden and her divine mandate.”

“My mother?But… Wait! She was a Loviatan? Her Chosen?” No one had ever mentioned that you.

“Yes… You never knewher, and I suppose her sister didn’t speak much of her while you were growing up.”

“No... She refused to speak about either of my parents. So, I just stopped asking… She would always have this pained look on her face when asked about my mother.”Anytime a visitor who had known your mother came to the grove they would seek out your aunt, and every time she would turn them away, no answer other than she was gone. And every time their eyes would drift to you, scrutinizing you, one even whispered how very much like her you were…

“I’m sure she had her own thoughts on her little sister’s life, her choices and the consequences of them. But that isn’t what we need to speak ofnow,” She looks from the fire to you, “As the Chosen your mother was commanded by Loviatar to perform a ritual… one meant to bring forth the next Chosen. A Chosen that would be the destined consort for the Chosen of Bane.”

“Gortash?!” You can’t help shouting his name in disgust.

“Not necessarily. Child, please let me finish,” She sighs heavily, “…The ritual required the Chosen of Bane, at the time, to participate… Your father…” You stare into the fire, you never knew anything about your father, only that your eyes were his eyes and your aunt hated them, “The ritual was to be a divine contract between gods, consecrated by their Chosen, performed on sacred ground… Thus, your conception and even your birth happened here, in the inner sanctum of out temple, upon the altar stone, witnessed by the highest of clergy for both Bane and Loviatar. You were brought into this world in blood and pain… and death.”

“My mother’s?”

“Yes, at the moment of your birth, her death, you became Her Chosen. All of us in attendance knew what your mother’s fate was to be and what your future would hold,”

“But then why was I raised by my aunt? Was it because my motherdied?”

“Partly. Your aunt never accepted Layla’s abandonment of their grove or her conversion to our Maiden. And when she learned of this ritual, she tried to take her sister away, but she came too late. You were already here, and your father was planning on raising you himself… But that I wouldn’t allow. I refused to let him take you. I feared his intentions. So, I let your aunt steal away with you.”

“What about my father scared you? I’ve never even seen you so much as worry,”

“The very nature of what you are, my dear, gave me reason to question what he would do with you… to you.” She breathes deeply, “Your power as Her Chosen affects His Chosen. You empower them to be more of what makes them so enticing to Bane. You amplify their desire for power, control, domination, their very ability to be the tyrants Bane wishes them to become. They are drawn to you as much as you will be drawn to them, ensuring you stay near them, so that they may benefit from your power.”

“Do they know? I mean, do His Chosen know why they’re drawn to me?”

“Maybe? Who can say. I’m not a Chosen of Bane.”

“Do I have any control over this?”

“I don’t know, my child. You tell me,” You look down uncomfortably, thinkingof Astarion, “What I do know is that it is nigh on impossible to deny a divinely ordained destiny bound toyou through your blood. Just look at the Bhaal Spawn. Try as they may, very few have been able to resist their blood’s calling. And I know you have never tried to deny yours… you just didn’t know that that’s what you were indulging in. Your own dark urges gifted to you on a god’s whim.” She looks sadly at your face and then looks away.

You sit and stare at the fire for a few minutes letting her words sink in. The whole of your childhood spent feeling like an outcast suddenly making so much more sense. The sad look your aunt always gave you when she found you hurting yourself, the way she tried so hard to make you feel the Oak Father’s sweet blessing and how it always felt wrong to you, you hated the way it felt but could never understand why. This temple was the first place you felt at home, accepted, like you could truly be yourself. And it’s because you were made to belong here, in this world, and you find that you don’t hate that. You’ve always loved being you, and even if it was never a choice, you wouldn’t have it any other way. But what of being meant for the Chosen of Bane? Why does Gortash revolt you so much if you’re meant to be with him?

“I don’t understand about the whole Bane’s Chosen thing… If I’m supposed to be drawn tothem, why does Gortash make my skin crawl?”

“I have thoughts on that. It’s part of the reason why I didn’t introduce you to him, and instead had you become a proper Paramour with a debut. Something about this brash young man doesn’t sit right with me. I’ve been around long enough to know when one of these up jumped men has staying power, and he does not. For one thing, he’s human, and they don’t exactly have the life span you do.” You both softly giggleat that, “And for another, he’s more of… ofa flash in the pan,a shooting star. A great, spectacular burstof light that catches everyone’s attention and then it’s gone. I knew he would be replaced soon enough, so I was simply going to have you wait him out.And then,once he was gone, I would tell you everything, to prepare you for the next one.”

“Are Chosen so quickly replaced?”Well, you suppose then can be. After all, you took your mother’s place before she was even cold.

“My dear, the gods are nothing if not prudent. Even when they have a Chosen there’s always more with the potential to become the next one. Some are even more desired by theirgod, so thewhoever thecurrent chosen is can be conveniently dispatched, enablingthe rise of the next. And seeing as you’re so very young for an Elf, I made the judgement call to wait this one out. As for your revulsion of Gortash, I’d wager that you’ve found the one who has the greatest potential to surpass him as Chosen.”She holds her chin, nodding, her eyes looking into yours.

“Is that why…” You think of the incrediblepull you have towardsAstarion and how he seems to have one towards you, almost exactly how she described how you would feel, “Is that why I found someone, even before I was captured, that I felt that pull towards?”

“Oh, you mean that harlequin from the masquerades? The vampire you’ve been traveling with?” She gives you a knowing smirk.

“How do you know about Astarion?” You can’t hide your shock.

“You think Lady Shar is the only one with a network of spies or access to privileged information?” Her smirk turns to a devious smile.

“I guess not… You always did know everybody’s business,” How did she know he’s a vampire? That they’re the same person? What else does she know? But those aren’t the questions you need answers to now. You take a breath and try to focus, “So if you meant to keep me away from Gortash, how did he find out about me?”

“Because he is also infuriatingly well informed. His Banite lackeys took advantage of their privileges here, one of them forcing their way into this very office to riffle through our records, using a very thinly veiled threat should I refuse them. Those Steel Watch machines would have leveled this sacred place. And so I have been stuck with them ‘guarding’ us since then.”

“Ugh! Now what am I supposed do?” You groan and slumpdowninto the chair, “He’s expecting me to go to him and, ew… be ‘His Consort.”

Davora doesn’t answer you, instead she hums to herself, nodding, stroking her chin, as she does when she's contemplating something,

“Hmm… Might I suggest going to him and using his inability to see that you’re not actually his to your advantage? Maybe you can bring about his downfall and we can all move on from this mess.”

“You don’t think he’d suspect me?” You lean closer to her, intrigued by her suggestion.

“No. The fool is so thoroughly convinced he understands how this whole thing works that he’d never think you capable of disobedience, let alone betrayal,”

You think on this idea of hers, you want nothing to do with him and would gladly be rid of himin any way you can. Karlach seems to have history with him, she’s made it quite clear that she’d happily smash his face in. Even this cult of The absolute, the whole reason you’re in this mess is connected to him, you want him dead just for that. May as well see if letting him have you will give you the chance to slit his throat whilehe sleeps. You thank Davora and leave her office, slowly walking down the hall towards the stairs when you see someone standing there, waiting for you,

“I missed you; you know?” It’s Ana, smiling, arms outstretched and tears in her eyes.

“Gods! I’ve missed you too!” You run into her arms, nearly toppling her, hugging her as tightly as you can, “Why’d you close the door in my face?”You cry into her chest.

“I was told not to speak to you until you’d seen Davora.” She squeezes you back, “Are back? Are you staying?”

“No… I can’t. There’s…” Gods, where do you even begin? “There’s a lot I have to tell you, but I can’t right now. I have to do something, and I don’t know when I’ll be able to go drinking and gossiping with you, but I promise, as soon as I can, I will.” You’re sobbing at needing to leave her again, but now you know; she’s safe, she was never taken, and you will see her again.

“You owe me so many drinks!” She says, laughing through her tears as she lets you go.

2.

You return to the foyer where Karlach and Lae’zel wait for you, standing as they see you coming up the stairs.You rush over to them, shushing them before they can ask anything. You tell them that though you cannot go into details, you do know what Gortash wants with you and that you should return to the fortress for now. Karlach is not thrilled but she agrees, Lae’zel doesn’t question you about it, simply nodding and following you to the door where that man stands, waiting.

You get out to the carriage and see it now has several trunks lashed to the roof, the man notices you looking and informs you that they’re your things from your room, you’ll be needing them at the fortress. You smile and politely assure him they will be put to good use, and then you climb into the carriage. Karlach growls at him as she follows you in, grumbling that you won’t be staying there. You bite your tongue, saying nothing as you feel Lae’zel stare at you, but she too says nothing.

No one speaks on this ride either, but this time you sit up straighter and keep a pleasant look on your face, beginning to play your part, you must, if this plan is going to work. You’re once again escorted up to Gortash’s chambers and told to wait, guarded by the Steel Watch. Karlach angrily paces while you and Lae’zel sit, watching her, listening to her grumble about smashing in his face the second she sees it. Lae’zel attempts to calm her, but it only infuriates her more, so she goes back to sitting in silence.

This wait also weighs heavily on you, the longer it goes on the more you begin to question what you’re planning on doing… Are you really willing to submit yourself to Gortash for long enough to kill him? You’ve never killed anyone outside of battle, even then it’s only been a few… How would you even escape this place with his blood on your hands? He’s surrounded by guards and the Steel Watch…

His heavy footsteps echoing off the high ceiling snap you back to whats happening,

“I have had your things sent to my bedchamber, it appears we will have to find you something more suitable to wear atmy inauguration as Archduke, but that is a small matter for tomorrow.”

“Thank you, my Lord.” You cast your eyes down, give a diminutive smile and dip a small curtsy to him, reminding yourself to keep playing along.

He smiles, satisfied with your change in attitude before turning his attention to Lae’zel,

“I have a proposal for the rest of you. One I think you’ll be open to. Though, perhaps it is best discussed with all of you present.” He keeps his gaze on Lae’zel while holding out his gauntleted hand to you.

You hesitate for a moment, looking at his hand, reviling the thought of having to hold it. Your heart begins to pound as you think how this may be a chance to get out of here, to come up with a different plan once you’re safely back with your friends… With Astarion,

“Or maybe I could bring your proposal to them?” You saunter over to him, delicately placingyour hand in his, “They may be more amenable if it comes from me. And I would be able to address all of them at once,” You turn your gaze on Karlach silently willing her to keep quiet, “I would return immediately with their response, My Lord.”

“An excellent suggestion. Who better to negotiate on both our behaves? My man will escort you there and back. And with a proper honor guard, as is befittingofmy consort.”No! You had thought it would only be the man in the carriage and one Steel Watch… not an honor guard… “I am so very pleased your little talk with Davora has opened your eyes to your destiny.” His hand suddenly clamps down around yours,crushing it, almost to the point of breaking,“Your safe return is now also part of this bargain. I’ll not have your former companions thinking they can deny me you.” He brings your hand up to his lips, pressing a kiss on the back of it.

Now you know, you’ve made a grave mistake. You should have tried to flee at the temple. You could have managed to separate your friends and made a run for it from the back… No. No, you couldn’t have run then. The metal monsters that were swarming your home would have torn the place apart to find you…

There was never going to be an escape for you. The moment that man came the find you at the shop it was over… You don’t know what you’re doing anymore, but this agreement may be the only way of keeping everyone safe…

He keeps his crushing grip on your hand as he lays out his proposal; an alliance against Orin, the Chosen of Bhaal. Your companions are to find her, kill her and retrieve her nether stone, bringing it back to him. Then they can join forces with him and use all three nether stones to subjugate the elder brain. In exchange they need not fear his Steel Watch, nor any city officials, and it goes without saying; you will remain by his side.

Another carriage ride taken in unspoken unease; this time escorted by six Steel Watch monstrosities. The ride is short, you arrive at the camp quickly enough, but you’re greeted with armed and guarded friends. Lae’zel is the first to emerge, calling for everyone to put down their weapons. You can hear the commotion, everyone talking at once as Karlach exits next. You stay a moment, telling the attendant to stay here, he need not interfere. He agrees, but urges that you do not take too long, Lord Gortash is not a patient master.

Lae’zel and Karlach are hurriedly catching everyone up on what happened today. You stand motionless behind them, the weight of everything descending upon you and a suddenfearlooming in the back of your mind…Howare you going to convince Astarion to go along with this?Lae’zel stops, looking at you, waiting for you to continue,

“Right, um…” Your voice shakes, tears threatening to fall, your breath going all ragged as you try getting through this, “Gortash is proposing an alliance… He will help with the elder brain; we need all three stones for that. The crown only works with all three. He’s willing to share control with you. So, you have to get the other one from Orin, the other Chosen… You need to find her first, he doesn’t know where she’s hiding, and he can’t tell where or when she will pop up so… You have to figure that out, and… And in exchange you won’t have to worry about the metal- the Steel Watch or any city guards giving you trouble and… I’m…” You look at everyone but Astarion. You can’t bring yourself to, but you feel his eyes on you, “I’m to stay with him… as his consort.”

“What?!” Astarion’s shouts, soundingsoveryangry, “No! This is absurd! Why?”

“Absolutely not. You’re not going back to that monster! I’m going to fucking kill him, that’s what we’re going to do!” Karlach joins her objection to his.

“Is this… is thissomething you’rereallywilling to do?” Shadowheart is the first to tentatively entertain this idea, she being the only other one to know of your past.

“I am.” You clench your fists, digging yournails into your palms; you have to do this.

“What of this Orin? Have any of you met her yet?” Lae’zelimplores, neither agreeing nor objecting so far.

“Unfortunately, yes.” Wyll speaks up, “She’s stalking us. She came to me and Shadowheart wearing the face of a Flaming Fist, saying the most disturbing things and then transformed into her true self. She’s a damned shapeshifter. And a deadly one at that. I can see why Gortash is having trouble with her. She should be dealt with, and soon.”

“So, she is yet another formidable obstacle… I do not like this Gortash, but he is willing to be a help rather than a hindrance. We should consider his offer, at least for now. There is no reason we must keep to this agreement once we have what we need,” Lae’zel looks at you reassuringly.

“That is also very true. There are a fair number of things that need accomplishing in the city. And those endeavors would be greatly aided if we did not have to worry about being hounded by the Steel Watch or guards. Once those things have been taken care of, we can move on to ridding ourselves of Gortash and claim his nether stone for ourselves. Who knows, maybe we can even discover a way of disabling the Steel Watch and truly be rid of him. Talia need not be his prisoner for long.” Gale further pushes for acceptance.

“I said no!No, you will not be some bargaining piece in this!And what is this about being ‘his consort’?” Astarion stalks up to you, glaringdown, threatening your resolve.

“Astarion, please, you have to see reason. This may be our best chance to kill him, he’d have his guard down. Otherwise… otherwise,what are we supposed to do if we refuse? How do we fight those things? How do you move around a city that’s completely hostile to you?How… I…I won’t risk your life!” You plead, trying to use any thing you can think of to convince him;you can’t tell himthe truth in front of everyone.

“You didn’t answer me. Why are you to be his consort?”

“It’s not like I want to be!” You begin to break, grabbinghis hand in both of yours, “Please, I can explain, but first, will you please agree to this deal?” You can’t stand the idea of going against his wishes, you don’t even think you could… Whatever hewants is what you will do…

“Killing the shapeshifter, I will agree to. But he can’t have you. I won’t agree to that.” His voice goes cold.

“Come on, let’s leave them alone. They need to talk, and I think we already know our answer,” Shadowheart looks at you sadly, she knows there’s more to this than what you’re telling them, and she knows that you can’t. She turns, herdingeveryone away.

“What’s going on?!Why would you even agree to this in the first place?!”

“There’s something I have to tell you… It has something to do with why I agreed to this… But mostly… mostly it’s about why I am the way I am… Why you and I…” Tears sting your eyes, and your throat tightens as you fight to find the words... It’s not just that Gortash thinks he has a claim to you, it’s everything you learned finally sinking in. It’s that what you are made Astarion want you, like a compulsion. What you are is no different from Cazador, forcing him to be with you… “I’ll… I’ll understand if you change your mind… if you don’t want me after I tell you why… why the first time you saw me you wanted me… You couldn’t help it; it was beyond your control. I didn’t mean for it to happen! It’s just because of what I am! I’m so sorry my lo-… I’m so sorry Astarion.” His eyes narrow sharply when you won’t say ‘my love’, you try letting go of his hand, but he grabs yours, gripping tightly.

“Then tell me. What’s going on? What are you?”

You stop trying to pull away and instead ready yourself for when he will toss your hand aside in disgust. You try and fail to steady your breath, only able to speak through stutters and tears, but you tell him everything Davora told you. You tell him what your mother did, what you are because of it, and why Gortash wants you to return. You explain that he has the potential to be the next Chosen of Bane, the potential to surpass Gortash, that that is why you feel so inextricably drawn to one another, why he wanted you from the moment he saw you…

Astarion listens to it all, still holding your hand, giving you the strength to continue. You tell him that you think he’s the one you’re meant to be with, that whatever your power as the Chosen of Loviatar lead you to the one that’s supposed to be the Chosen of Bane, the one you will be the consort of. It’s the only thing that makes sense to about this whole thing. You know he’s your destiny; not Gortash, not some other person with potential, it’s Astarion that you’re meant to be with.

“How am I supposed to let you go back now that you’ve told me this?” He takes you in his arms,holdingyou close, “I don’t care if it was the gods’meddling;you belong to me. I refuse to let him have you… But I also realize this is our best chance for being rid of both him and Orin. I… Are you certain about this, my love?”

“Honestly? No. But what other choice do we have?” You lean into him as he brings his face down to his place, his lips pressing into your pulse, “You willing to rescue a silly damsel from a tower?”

“I thought you weren’t some damsel in need of rescuing?” You smile and push at him ineffectually. He wraps an arm around your waist, pulling you closer still, his other hand tangling into your loose hair, gripping you, tilting your head to the side,“I’ll always come for you. You’re mine, remember?” He whisperspossessivelybefore biting down and drinking you in.

“I’m yours.” You shiver intohis bite, wanting him to never let go.

3.

Everyone gathers as you prepare to depart once more. You tell them of Davora and Ana at your temple, Lae’zel and Karlach know where it is, you’re certain they will be able to help in some way. Shadowheart assures you that they’ll find a way to do everything and get you out of there as soon as possible. Tearfully you say your goodbyes and walk back to the carriage to return to your temporary prison.

Upon your arrival at Wyrm’s Rock there’s a tall stern woman waiting, she speaks with the attendant that had escorted you before she turns her icy gaze on you, instructing you to follow her. When you open your mouth to speak, she silences you with a glare so intense you’d think she’d turn you to stone. You follow her to another room where there’s a bath and one of your old dresses waiting for you; you are to make yourself presentable to his Lordship. She stands with her back turned as you bathe and dress as quickly as you can, knowing this woman is probably more impatient than Lae’zel, and not nearly as friendly.

You stand ready; it’s odd being in one of your Paramour gowns again, the feeling almost foreign now. You leave your hair loose and flowing down your back, the sensation of it brushing against your skin reminding you of Astarion and how he loves to play with it. The thought only fills you with longing as you follow the woman up to Gortash’s chambers.

He stands gazing out of a window, turning away from it as you’re announced. His eyes watching you glide across the room, your dress swishing tantalizingly around your legs, offering glimpses up to your hips every few steps. Time to play your part, the one you’re most familiar with, a submissive Paramour. His eyes hungrily take in the sight of you, holding his hand out so you may hold it,

“Lovely, truly lovely…” He takes your hand, bringing you in closer to the candelabra burning by the window, the woman and his attendant quietly leave the room as his eyes stay focused on you. Just as the door closes his eyes suddenly harden as they scrutinize you more closely, “Though your hair is… such an obnoxious color.”

“Um… My hair my lord? I cannot help the color of my hair...” His comment caught you so off guard that you almost forget to keep up your act. Why would he say something like that? He saw you earlier and said nothing of it. He was just saying that you were lovely…

“Oh yes you can. We will dye it, to better match my tastes.” He pulls a bit of it forwards, rubbing it contemptuously between his fingers before letting it fall away.

You look upon him in momentary horror, your voice growing meeker,

“My Lord, please… I do not want to change my hair…” All your life people had praised the vibrant color, marveled at the way it shifted in the light, “I like the color of it…” It’s Astarion’s favorite… like blood...

“I do not. And you will, for I have said you will…” He drops your hand, grabbing your face with the clawed grip of his gauntlet, turning your head from side to side, looking down disdainfully into your eyes, “Shame the same cannot be done for your eyes… Another vulgar reminder...”

“What is wrong with my eyes? I do not understand. What are they a reminder of?” What about you is he so disgusted by if he wants you for his consort? Why does he want to change how you look?

His rage at your ignorance fuels the brutality of his shouts,

“They along with your ridiculous red hair scream to all those lecherous sycophants what you were! That they all saw you! That they all fuckedyou! And now they will laugh behind my back, saying that I’ve taken their sullied leavings! You were meant to be MINE! None of them should have ever laid their filthy hands on you! None of them should have tasted the fruit that was mine to devour!” He shoves you against the windowsill, his hand squeezing your face, the claws of his gauntlet piercing your skin as he spreads your legs, freeing himself and pushes into you, “You’re mine!” He grunts into your ear between thrusts, “Say that you’re mine!” You remain silent, keeping your face from showing your revulsion at feeling him inside of you, “Say it!”

“I’m yours.” Bile rises in your throat as the words leave your lips.

“Mine!” He bites down on your ear, pulling out so he can spill himself onto you, like a dog marking its territory. He stays there, panting, his sour breath sickening you before he finally pushes away, adjusting his gauntlet, wiping away the drops of your blood that cling to it, “Do clean yourself up before crawling into my bed.”

He stalks off behind a changing screen, leaving you to slump against the cold glass of the window. A moment later he emerges in his night clothes and goes to his bed, where he sits, watching you as you get up and go to the basin of water to clean yourself off. You can hear him huffing in impatience, you quickly dry yourself and walk over to him, making sure your face is the picture of satisfied obedience.

You stare into the darkness as he snores next to you. You want to get up but fear waking him lest he should want a repeat, or worse, to berate you for things beyond your control, things you like… Things Astarion loves.Thinking of your lover only makes you compare him to this little tyrant beside you and how he is the superior of Gortash in every way. Why would a god want this man for anything? But, then again, what do you know of gods and their machinations with mortals? It’s all beyond you to even contemplate, so you close your eyes and wait for the dawn to break.

Unfortunately, with the dawn comes the lustful waking of this man. He pushes you face down and mounts you, shoving your face into the blankets as he moves his hips. You do as is expected, you moan and whimper at his disgusting touch, attempting to move your body to match his, but are unable to for his thrusts are ill timed and have no guiding rhythm. He finishes quickly, rolling off of you.

Two attendants come into the room, his man from before and a woman holding another of your dresses to change you into. He watches you dress, furrowing his brow at you. He comes over to you, taking your hand, holding it out to your side, looking you up and down,

“You will make a fine ornament on my arm at today’s festivities, though… you will need to be more conservative in your attire. These things of yours are yet another reminder of how you were allowed to debase yourself, tch. That Truescar of yours didn’t know who she was dealing with…” He brings your hand to his lips and places a tepid kiss on the back of it, “Come, let us dine. I have much to see to before this whole thing can begin.”

“As you wish, my Lord.” You smile sweetly at his falsely affectionate gesture, worrying about how he spoke of Davora just now.

4.

You sit at the table next to Gortash as he eats his breakfast and reads some important bit of paper. You have no appetite, so you just push the food around your plate for a bit before moving to stand,

“Eat.” He says, his mouth full of half chewed food.

“I amnot hungry.”

“I said eat. I do not appreciate being made to repeat myself,” He studies your face carefully, seeming incredulous that you did not immediately do as he said.

“Of course.” You sit back down and bring a spoonful up to your lips, his eyes following your every move; you’ll have to be more careful in heeding his requests, Davora told you he thinks you incapable of disobedience.

Three more big bites and he seems satisfied enough to stop watching you and return to his business.He finishes, gathering his papers and holding them out to his attendant before standing, striding over to your side and speaking down to you,

“Do not tarry with your food, there will be a seamstress sent in momentarily to fit you for an appropriate gown; one befitting my coronation and the ball following it this evening.” He holds your face for a moment, his thumb sliding across your lips before parting them, pushing into your mouth. You oblige him, sucking gently looking up at him as he smiles wickedly at your antics. He pulls it out and then squeezes your face harshly, “And… you best be unrecognizable the next time I see you, My Consort.”

He goes, leaving behind that stern woman from last night; she’s to be your attendant but you think she’s more your jailer than anything. She’s tall with dirty blonde hair and sharp features: she introduces herself as Vallena. You nod, readying to follow suit when she turns away from you to supervise the cleanup of the table and then ushers in the seamstress.

You stand on a pedestal in front of a full-length mirror wearing a darkly lovely garment; a gown of black and gold damask, with black pearls sewn throughout the bodice and fitted so tightly to every contour that you can barely move in it. She pins up the hem, the only part that needed adjusting for your petite stature. But for all its beauty you know it will be nearly impossible to walk in, let alone dance; all it’s good for is for sitting and looking pretty, truly an ornament on display.

With the fitting over you hope to walk around the fortress a little, but as soon as you go to open a door Vallena stops you. Her voice brooking no argument, you are to stay here in his Lordship’s chambers, not even the ramparts surrounding it are permitted to you. Your existence has not yet been announced, and Gortash does not want you wandering around looking like the harlot you are. She smiles cruelly at that, watching you flinchat being called out for what you are… were… Besides, there’s more that you must do to be presentable…

Another woman comes in with bottles of dark acrid smelling liquids; it’s time to dye your hair… She has you sit in the empty bath as she mixes her potions together with a foul-smelling powder, slathering it through your hair and leaving it to harden into a crumbly shell. Once dried she convinces you jailer to let her rinse it outside; she needs you to lay on top of something as she does it so that is does not stain your skin as well. She follows you both and supervises the whole procedure and when the woman is finally done your hair is no longer a glorious shade of red but so dark as to be almost black, shining violet in the sun. She gives Vallena a powder that can be used for your eyebrows and lashes, should you choose to color those as well. Your hair will discolor with every wash, you silently rejoice, this humiliation will not be permanent.

By the time that’s all over you’re given a scant lunch and then fussed at by the seamstress and a team of ladies who ready you for the coronation. Your hair is pulled up into a tight up-do, a few tendrils left to dangle around your face and down your back, harsh dark makeup, that powder used to disguise your eyebrows and lashes, the look finalized with a dark violet lipstick to match your new hair. You look nothing like yourself, but that’s the point. He did want you to be unrecognizable…

He comes to his rooms at they’re finishing up with you, shouting at someone about something, you don’t know, just the sound of his voice is enough to irritate you. You steady yourself, rising with a smile to greet him as he strides over to you, to appraise you once again,

“Perfect, my dear. Now, you are fit to be at my side as I take the city. None shall know you for what you were. You shall be a tantalizing mystery to them all. I do suppose it is a good thing none knew your true name. Another thing that would have had to be changed… But no matter. Come, my adoring patriars await.” He holds out arm, waiting for you to elegantly drape your hand over his for a grand entrance.

“As they should, my Lord.” You dare a sharper smirk, stroking his ego, letting him think you’re excited for him.

Inside the audience chamber you are led to a small, padded chair beside his throne and from there watch this ridiculous farce. He takes his place, says a few words, Wyll’s father dubs him Archduke and he rises, prouder than ever before. You look out into the crowd as this goes on, seeing if you recognize any faces, none are familiar.

It ends and he takes his seat upon the throne, cordially chatting with the sycophants that approach, offering up their sincerest congratulations. You’re paid every kind of compliment, and you return them with sweet smiles and doting praise of their fine selves, always hearing them whispering as they come and go about who you must be to have secured Gortash. He smiles, giving away nothing, enjoying watching them tie themselves up in knots trying to sus out who the mysterious woman beside him is. He also takes note of your fine manners and eloquent conversation, saying how you’re playing your part admirably. He has no idea just how much of this is an act, but he will soon enough.

Finally, the last of them approaches; it’s an older gentleman and who you assume to be his son, a tall young man with a muscular build, who’s eyes stay glued to you. Try as you may to keep from staring back, you find it difficult not to, you know this man from the masquerades, and you fear he recognizes you. This tyrant in the making beside you would not stand for it, thankfully the young man says nothing as the older one speaks with Gortash. Once they have finished speaking Gortash excuses the two of you so that you may prepare for tonight’s ball.

You return to his chambers, his hand sliding up your back, beginning to undo the tight lacing of the gown, opening it up enough to help you out of it. He slips a hand through your dark hair, bringing it to his lips as he stares into your eyes, you know what he wants. You step out of the pile on the ground and guide him to his bed where you lay back and let him claim you again. You let your mind wander to memories of Astarion’s body on yours and what pleasure he brings you. The fool on you now thinking your body is responding to his defiling touch and ill-timed movements.

Once he’s finished, he calls for the bath to be filled, you are to join him; the two of you will be made ready together. Again, you’re dressed in black and gold, but this time the gown is velvet with golden embroidery, to match his ensemble, your hair remains up and your make garish. You accompany him back down the stairs to the waiting festivities.

You stand demurely by his side, silent unless spoken to, your hand tucked into the crook of his elbow. But with so many clamoring to speak with their new ruler you find he is soon swept away, pleased to be swarmed by all thefawning hangers on. With him otherwise occupiedyou slip away to stand by the musicians. You may not be able to dance in this ridiculously restrictive gown, but you can at least close your eyes, sway to the melody,and pretend to be anywhere but here.

“I was wondering who had claimed you, my little kitty.” The familiar deep voice,of the young man from before, whispersoverly loud in your ear.

Your eyes snap open as your performer’s face comes back on,

“I am not sure I know what it is you are speaking of my good sir.”

“Don’t be coy, now. I’d recognizethose lips and that body, even covered up,anywhere.” He runs the back of his hand up your arm, pushing aside a tendril of hair to continue talking into your ear,“After all, I had a lot of fun with them, didn’t I?”

“I suppose you did. You certainly sought me out often enough,” You smile pleasantly out at the crowd, not turning to look at him, no sense in playing dumbwith this one; he knows you.

“Now, I am surprised that it was this guy who snatched you up. He doesn’t strike me as the type to keep a pet, or to show them off publicly, for that matter...” You remain silent, unsure of what he’s playing at. He moves his hand to rest on the back of your neck as he straightens up, relaxing into speaking with you, “Ya’ know, we were all trying to figure it out when you didn’t come to the last masque, and you couldn’t be found at The Chateau. You and that little silver haired elf boy, both of you just up and vanished.” The mention of Astarion makes you clench your jaw, trying to keep any reaction imperceptible, “Wonder who got their hooks into that one…”

“Who knows. Now if you’ll excuse me,” You shrug out of his grasp andlook up at him, “I must return to the Archduke, he will be expecting me.”

“Be seeing you, my little kitty.” It’s the smuggest of smirks, you fear him saying something to anyone else about who you are.

You walk away as quickly as you can in this absurdly tightgownand roll your eyes; Ana was right to call him an oaf! If that idiot needs to keep his discovery to himself… But if he recognized you does that mean others have too? How many of the other patriars from those hedonistic bacchanals also recognize you? Is that why Davora truly had you become a paramour? To further keep you away from Gortash? Did she know of his disgust withsuch things?

You make it to your little padded chair and sit, anxiously waitingfor this night to end. You want nothing more to do with these people. As you sit a waiter with a tray of glasses stops, offering you a glass and a whispered word,

“May our maiden guide you…” you keep your eyes down, holding the glass to your lips, breathless as he continues, “Your friends need time. Patience.” And with that he walks back into the crowd, leaving you with a glimmer of hope this will all be over soon.

Chapter 18

Chapter Text

1.

The night drags on until dawn. You sit on your little chair, your body stiff from holding yourself in one position for so very long and your feet have gone to pins and needles by the time he comes to collect you. But when he holds out his hand you smile up at him as though you were elated to be graced by his presence once more. He puts on a show of kissing your hand before leading you away towards his chambers; his audience tittering at this display of affection for you.

Once the door has closed behind you his hand drifts down your back, the clawed fingers of his gauntlet digging into you through your dress as he growls in your ear,

“What was that whelp speaking to you about earlier?”

You let the pain of his grip fuel your performance, smiling up at him with feigned curiosity,

“Who do you mean, my Lord? There were several people who came to speak with me throughout the evening.”

“Duke E-”

“Forgive the interruption, my Lord, but there has been an urgent missive sent for you.”

The attendant bows deeply, sweat dripping from his red face. Gortash looks down at him and huffs, releasing you to continue to bed,

“Hopefully this will not take long, and I will join you presently, my dear.” He gives you an irritated smile before following the breathless man.

“I await your swift return, my Lord.” Your eyes look down, diminutive and sultry as you turn to walk away, thankful to not have to suffer his company as you try to get some amount of rest.

You stay in bed into the early afternoon before he returns, looking haggard and irate. His eyes linger on you where you lay in his bed, you hadn’t been up more than a few minutes when he came shambling in. He orders you to stay put as he readies himself to join you under the covers, you hide your distaste with a simple,

“As you command.” He seems pleased with your response and soon enough comes to you.

Thankfully he sleeps and doesn’t insist on your services, but you are wrapped tightly in his arms and are forced to listen to his snores. His attendant comes to wake him a few hours later, he has yet more work that needs to be done. You are left to entertain yourself in his chambers until he returns.

With the day almost over you decide to call for a bath, that Vallena woman arches her brows as high as possible, but she cannot deny you such a simple thing. You soak in the water until all the warmth has left it and by the time you get out you can see the water is quite dark with the dye; hopefully a few more soaks like this and you’ll have some semblance of red in your hair again. You dress and then sit by the window to watch the sun slowly sink over the city, ruminating on how long you will be trapped here.

Gortash returns to his rooms with a very late dinner brought up behind him. It is a lavish spread of roasted meats, soups, glazed vegetables and creamy desserts. Your mouth waters at the smell of it, you haven’t eaten a meal yet, only nibbles of fruit and bread left on the sideboard of his bedchamber. You watch as they set everything on the table, there’s far too much food for the just two of you, and you wonder if he’sexpecting company, but no one comes.

A plate with a taste of everything is set before you with a large glass of rich red wine and the same is placed before Gortash. He eats his fill while watching youcut up your food and place small bites in your mouth, his eyes following every move. He raises his voice to the servant,

“My Lady is done. She will be refraining from dessert as well.”

Your plate is cleared away before you can finish, before you can even place your silverware down, and the wonderful looking treats are whisked away, wholly untouched. Why would he do that? All that glorious food just wasted… He looks at your pouting face and speaks,

“There is an importantmatter I need to speak with you about,” He gets up then pulls your chair out from the table so that he cantower over your still seated self, “You wouldn’t happen to have any idea what those old companions of yours are up to, now would you?” He scrutinizes your face, looking for you to give anything away.

“No, I do not, my Lord. Has something happened?” You keep your face serene, your voice calm and sweet.

“I thought not,” He leans down and grips the arms of your chair,trapping you, his face close enough for you to smell his breath, “I do wonder what they’re planning. Because whatever it is, it won’t work. I’ve worked too hard for this whole scheme to fall apart at the meddling of some rouge true souls. I am destined for greatness. And you shall be there to witness it all, to enjoy a life at my side. They will see their error soon enough.”

“Of course, they will. Who would be foolish enough to stand against you?” You nuzzle his jaw and let him kissyou, trying not to cringe.

He breaks away only long enough to dismiss the servants before he comes back to your lips. His hands groping you,one coming up to your face to slide his fingers in your mouth and watch your lips wrap around them.He bringsyou up to standing so he can sit you on the table and claim his prize. You know it won’t take long, so you play your part, making all the noises you know he wants to hear. Though this time he lingers…his breath hot on your ear as he begins to bring his mouth down to your neck, to Astarion’s place,and you flinch. You couldn’t help it; this fool doesn’t belong there. But it’s too late, he felt you recoil at his touch.

“Hehe… That tickled…” You softly giggle as you wrap your arms around his shoulders, tangle your fingers in his hair and hold him there a moment so he won’t see your face.

“I didn’t know you were ticklish…” His voice is low, and you fear the worst, “I shall have to keep that in mind for next time.” He pushes back against your embrace, you let yourhands slide down to rest on his shoulders where he grasps them, bringingthem together,holdingboth your wrists in one of his hands.

“Only a little. You caught me by surprise, my Lord.”

He doesn’t say a word only forces your hands to one side on the table making you twist uncomfortably as he examines your exposed skin. He rips the delicate straps of your gown, shoving it down to your hips so he may see more of you. He raises your arms over your head, his other hand dragging across your skin as your mind races, trying to remember if you had rid yourself of every mark Astarion had made on you. You know his last bite you immediately closed up; it wouldn’t have been safe to show up with a fresh bite on your neck… Then you remember him saying to leave a few that one time, and you did, you left one bite to heal fully on its own, letting it scar… But this man wouldn’t find it anywhere easily seen; high up on your inner thigh, so close to where Astarion’s mouth brought you such sweet pleasure after the glorious sting of his bite, a place only he would ever see, your dirty little secret.

Gortash releases your hands, seemingly satisfied with not finding anything in his search. You move to pull up the ripped front of your dress, but he stops you. Pulling you to stand and letting it fall to the floor, his lecherous smile at forcing you to be naked for him sends a chill down your spine. He leads you back to his bed where you’re made to crawl under the covers and spend the rest of the night at his mercy.

2.

Morning comes and with it his early departure, leaving you to entertain yourself, yet again, for the day. First things first; a bath, you want the smell of him off your skin and to get more of this damnable dye out of your hair. Vallena glowers as you go about bathing and soaking, you wonder if she knows what you’re doing about your hair. Well, even if she did, she hasn’t tried stopping you.

You get out and sit in the window letting the sun warm you and dry your hair. After the light has moved away, you dress and turn to Vallena,

“Could I have a visitor?” Perhaps Ana can be persuaded to keep you company here in this dreary place.

She stares at you for a long moment before barking out an incredulous laugh,

“No!” She laughs more and you only look at her confused, “Oh gods, you’re serious?!” Her laughter quiets to soft chuckles, “No, my Lady, you may not have visitors. But if you would like, I can provide you with a book.”

“No. I think not, thank you.” You know she would most likely bring something horrendously tedious to read, “How about a bard to play music?”

“No again, my Lady. No one may come to see you here.”

“Am I permitted to walk the grounds? Or even just the battlements?”

“No. You may not walk about the fortress. You are still dressed like the glorified bed warmer that you are.” Her eyes shine with malicious enjoyment, watching you bristle at every denied request and her once again using your life as a Paramour as an insult.

You glare back at her and flop back down into the chair by the window, turning to watch the shadows grow longer as the day wears on. What does he expect you to do all day locked up in these rooms with her?

Lunch arrives later than you would have liked, but it’s a wonderful spread of cold meats, cheeses, sweet fruits and fresh crusty bread. You eat your fill now that Gortash isn’t around to watch you. Why does he fixate on you when you’re eating? It’s the oddest thing, no one has ever done something like it; save for when Astarion was making sure you were getting more while in the shadow cursed lands. But that was different, he was draining you near every night, you needed to eat more. You go on eating, trying to see if you can stash a bit for later in case Gortash has your dinner taken away again.

Your empty plate is cleared and Vallena goes to where you put a bundled napkin of treats, giving it to the servants to take as well. She’s in on it too! Probably going to report how you stuffed you face and tried to hide more for later. You resign yourself to sitting by the window again and just stare into the void, waiting for something to happen; of course nothing does.

A late dinner with a late Archduke, followed by his body on and in yours. Thankfully he is quickly pleased before rolling off of you to sleep. You lay still looking up at the ceiling, waiting for dawn; for with dawn comes his rising. He leaves early, not even staying for breakfast with you, just leaving you in the care of that wretched woman again.

Another bath after your breakfast and another day spent wondering what to do with yourself. Today you look at the shelves of books lining the office area, but all of them are boring political nonsense or bound piles of his own papers. Your fingers brush the handles for the drawers but Vallena’s stern throat clearing wards you off from opening them. So, you decide to simply nap in the sun until more food is brought in.

A light late lunch is brought in, you are now convinced she told him of how you were eating, and this is the result. You pout to yourself and finish everything there is, wishing there was more. Afterwards you hum songs you only half remember while stretching and practice dancing. You’ve begun to work up a sweat when he comes back, his eyes fixing on you as you stop and curtsy to him,

“Welcome back, my Lord.” You keep your eyes lowered as you rise, knowing he likes these displays of deference from you.

“Enchanting…” He licks his lips and comes for you, his hands wrapping around your waist and pulling you into him, “But there is no need to continue such things. Your performing days are done.” He noses into your neck, and you shake, holding in the need to shove him away, instead biting down hard on the inside of your mouth.

He has you before dinner, and you join him for a bath. Then it's off to bed, naked and held tightly by him.

Three more days of this agony… Your body and mind growing increasingly restless as you await news.

Today he rises later than usual, he was also much later to bed than usual. He woke you when he returned so he could do with you as he pleased before falling asleep and snoring obnoxiously. Once he’s gone you stay in bed, not having gotten much rest; you intend to catch up on it now. Your rest is interrupted by a servant being shown in with a tray of food, and a whispered message,

“May our Maiden guide you. Tomorrow night, be ready.”

“Thank you.” You smile, genuinely smile.

“What was that?” Vallena strides over, her eyes darting between you and the servant.

“I was just saying thank you. Am I not permitted to even speak?”

“I was only givin’ m’Lady-”

“Silence you. Fine. Go, now.” She waits for the servant to scurry away, “Do not speak to them. If you require anything you tell me and then I will take care of it. Do you understand?”

You only stare in response, willing her to leave you in peace so you can eat without having her hovering over you. Another bath and now, finally, your hair looks almost like yours again. Vallena grumbles as you sun yourself in the window; you know it will be only a matter of time before he sends for that witch to color your hair again. But you won’t be here… and neither will he, for that matter.

Evening comes painfully slow. You’re bored out of your mind and with nothing else to do you stretch, but don’t dance, lest she report that too. Instead, you go over a few spells you’d like to use on Gortash when Astarion comes for you. As much as you would have liked to have slit his throat your first night here, it would have been impossible to escape; so, you settle for morbid fantasies, eagerly awaiting tomorrow night.

3.

The door bangs loudly against the stone wall as Gortash strides into the room, red faced and fuming, stopping abruptly in front of where you sit by the window. You’re forced to bring your feet down from the sill as he leans over you, trapping you in your chair. Thisfamiliar scene of him needing to look domineering; it takes all your will power nottosmile smugly up at him.

“They’re planning something! Tell me what it is!” His gauntletgrips the arm of your chair,beginning to splinter the wood,as his rageintensifies, “You know something! And you will give me answers!” Spittle flies from his shouting mouth onto your face,“I command you to.” The last few words area barely contained growl.

“Whatever do you mean, my Lord?”His fury means nothing to you, he has no power you need fear.

“GODS DAMN IT WOMAN!” That gauntlet comes up too quickly for you to react,viciously grabbingyour hair at the side of your head,pullingyou up to stand, toppling the chair, “How is this possible?!How are you able to deny me?!”

“My Lord,” You keep your face placid, the ripping at your scalp only giving you strength as you gently place a hand on his cheek, “I’ve done nothing but sit in this room for days. How would I know what those people are up to?” You force yourself to move closer to him, his grip allowing you to move.You give him such a sweet alluring look up through your lashes, “I’ve denied you nothing…” You caress his cheek,allowinghim to wrench your head to one side so that he may press his mouth onto yours.

He releases your hair to turn you towards the window, wishing to show his dominance over you by fucking you. His hands pushing up your clothes as you grip the windowsill, focusing on the faint shadows moving outside, his ever-present Steel Watch, and something else… a flicker of red eyes looking in on you. Your heart races, your love is here at last, and your lips stretch into a vicious smile. Gortash reaches forward to slip his fingers into your mouth as he busies himself with your body.

There’s a faint flash of light in the distance by the harbor followed by a low tremor that gently rattles the windows. Then a sudden clattering on the ramparts, the sound of metal collapsing in on itself as you see the shadows of the Steel Watch crumple. You feel Gortash stiffen at the noise, but before he can pull away from you, you clamp your jaw down onto his fingers just as the windows shatter around you.

Karlach’s raging scream echos sweetly in your ears as Gortash tries to rip his hand away from you, but you only hold on tighter. He uses that gauntlet to grip your hair and pull you off, shredsof his flesh coming away with you as you’re flung to the side, where Astarion is there to catch you. You spit out the bloody chunks and give him a gory smile, his hands briefly tightening their hold on you before letting go, the biggest smile on his beautiful face.

Lae’zel rushes in with Karlach to take down the would-be tyrant, but something strange begins to happen. His body shimmers and warps as something akin to what happened with Ketheric happens with Gortash, and he screams,

“YOU DISOBEDIENT WHORE! You and these would be assassins! We could have moved mountains! We could have shaken the planes! And you choose them?! How is this even possible?!You’re supposed to be mine!”

“I was neveryours!”

Roaring his fury, he moves lightning quick, activating something in the rooms. Traps that begin to spew fire all around you as a shimmering orb surrounds him, protecting him. Karlach is unfazed, but the rest of you need to keep away from them, making it difficult to get closer. Astarion sets to work, disabling them while you try to keep him and Lae'zel from burning alive. The room screams around you, a cacophony that makes it hard to concentrate, but soon enough he’s gotten all the traps, and you can finally focus on Gortash himself. You know just what you want to use on him…

You breathe deeply and put all your force of will into holding him in place, arresting any motion. You can feel his every attempt to resist, but try as he may, he has no power over you. He can’t stop you. You’ve known since the moment you saw him that Bane’s influence has waned. Gortash can’t call upon his god as he once could, he’s been forsaken and now he finally knows it too. His eyes bore into yours, realizing only now that you were never under his control, you played him for a fool. Your fingers curl into a fist solidifying your hold over him as Karlach caves in his chest with her great axe.

As soon as his body drops the spell dissipates and you notice something stinging your eyes. You wipe at them to find your hand covered in blood, it's trickling down your face, a gash on your scalp from the dead man’s gauntlet. You close it up as you approach the body of Gortash. Lae’zel stoops down to retrieve the nether stone as Karlach just stands over him, looking down,

“So Gortash is nothing more than a pile of flesh, same as the rest of us.” She sounds disappointed somehow.

“He’s dead now, Karlach. You’ve won. Gotten your revenge.” Astarion smiles over at her.

“I don’t feel like I’ve won… All I feel is tired. Is that it then? I’ve killed the man that ruined my life and now I crawl into a corner and die? Am I fucking missing something?!”

You know she knew Gortash, but you’d never asked her how, only knew she hated him, she thought him a monster,

“What do you mean?” You quietly ask, trying to understand why she sounds so dejected. Astarion is right she got her revenge…You both did. You’re elated he’s dead after only suffering at his hand for such a short time… She just ignores your question, like she didn’t even hear you.

“He’s dead and he’s no fucking sorrier now than he was before. He didn’t spare one thought for me while he was all I could think about for the past ten fucking years! I barely registered to him when he brought you here. Dismissed my very existence as though he wasn’t the one who betrayed me. Sent me to the hells to have my heart ripped out and replaced with an engine. Gave me away to the fucking devil!”Her voice cracks, tears burning away before they can fall.

“Karlach?” You reach out to her, her skin scorching yours, a pain you easily take as you helplessly watch this strong vibrant woman unravel.

“What was the point? I’m going to die. I’m going to be as dead as Gortash any day now. And what then? Off to the City of Judgement to waste into oblivion? Into the dirt to be eaten by maggots? Is that fucking all?! And you!” She clamps her fiery hand down on yours,holding you there, her eyes burning into you, “You’ll just keep going, won’t you? Watching the stars. Warming your hands by the campfire. Dancing, eating, making fucking love all night! All of it, all of it!” She throws your hand off her shoulder, “That’s my fucking reward for everything I suffered? That’s why I survived ten years of torment. The fighting, the clawing, the loneliness, the fucking loneliness…” She buries her face in her hands, sobbing, “It isn’t fair… I don’t want it like this…” She runsaway outthe door, Lae’zel chasing after her, leaving you to stand there utterly confused.

“I don’t understand… What happened to her? I thought she’d be happy to have finally killed him. It was all she said she wanted to do to him…” You look up at Astarion, you’ve never seen her so vulnerable before. She was always smiling and joking.

“I don’t know. She’s never confided in me.” He watches them leave before looking down at your burn, “My sweet, your hand, do something about that already.”

“Oh yes, of course.” You soothe your skin, erasing any evidence of burns before walking out after them leaving Astarion to follow you.

You get outside and see them talking quietly by a broken crenelation, Karlach’s fire finally dimming. You don’t know that you should interrupt so you resign yourself to looking out over the city, feeling fresh air for the first time since the coronation ball. You’re unsure how long you stand there alone. A shiver runs down your back from the cool night air and you realize he hasn’t come out of the room yet. You walk over to the door where he appears just as you reach it, surprising you,

“Everything all right? You were in there a while,”

“Nothing you need worry about,” He wraps a cloak around your shoulders and pulls you close, a wet cloth in his hand rubs your mouth briefly before tossing it aside, “Much better. Don’t want his foul taste on you when I…” His mouth comes down to yours and he kisses you deeply.

It makes your skin tingle and your need for him takes over, pushing aside any thought you might have spared for poor Karlach and her anguish. All you want to think about now is that you’re back where you belong, in his arms.

4.

You got no rest at all. Astarion spent the rest of the night reclaiming every inch of you, obliterating any remnant of the dead Chosenon your skin. You’re dazed and woozy from how much of you he drank, he needed to make up for every day you were gone. And through every moment you relished it. No one will ever make you feel like he does. You try to rise from the bed, only for him to pull you back down,

“And where do you think you’re going?” His body hovers over you, sunlight streaming in through the window,making his hair look more gold than silver.

“I’m hungry,” You reach up into those soft curls and bring him down to you for a kiss.

The kiss stretches out as his hand caresses your skin, lightly dragging his fingers from your jawto your neck, over your collar bone, tracing the outline of anipple, dancing down your ribs where you giggleinto the kiss. Lower still,they continue over your hip and down to where your wetness waits for his teasing. His fingers slide in and swirl, his thumb pressing down on your clit, your body tightening around him,

“I thought you might be hungry for me…” He continues as you nibblehis lip, “Seems I was correct.”

“That’s unfair…” He does something else with those devious fingers and you can’t help the shivering moan that accompanies his movements.Panting, you try to speak, “I… am…”

You give up on words as he slides is fingers out so he can slide his hardness in. Hooking your leg up over his,beginningto roll his hips while his wet fingers tease a nipple. Every time his body moves it drives you closer to ecstasy. He’s slow and sweet this time,where last night he was ravenous and forceful. Any way he decides to take you is perfect. You let yourself melt into the languid pace, your hands reaching up over your head to tangle in the sheets,archingup into him. He shifts his weight to hover fully over you and stills his hips,

“Why?” You whimper at the halting of his movement.

“You won’t ever do that again. Will you, my sweet?” Your mind is so muddled by hunger, blood loss and lust, you don’t know what he’s referring to, the confusion must be written all over your face, “You won’t ever agree to something like that,without me, again. Will you?”

“No…” His hips roll once, “Mmm... I’m sorry…” Once more, “Ahh... I’ll never do anything without you again…” He smiles at that and answers your body’s desperate need for him.

He begins to thrust slowly,his lips comingdown to yoursfor the longest kiss you’ve ever known with him. When you finally lean back, gaspingfor air,those lips of his travel down to his place, reclaimingyou fully, once more. You climax at the intensity of his bite, it's all too much for you, your delirium pulls you down to unconsciousness.

By the time you wakeagainit’s dusk. Pink light bathes theside of the room you’re facing,your eyes drifting around, butyou don’t see him, or even hear him. You call out only for silence to be your answer. You’re too dizzy tosit up, or even move and you can barely keep your eyes open, so you letthem slide closed again.

The next thing you know there’s a fire being lit by Astarion as someone knocks at the door,showing themselves in with a tray of food. He thanks them as they quickly leave. He turns towards you, smiling,

“Finally awake I see,” He walks over with the tray and sits himself next to you on the bed, “Sit up.” You don’t know how you manage to, but you do, “Now, eat.”

“Where were you?”You yawn out the words and tilt your head side to side.

“I said eat.”

“I will, but…” His brow arches slightly whilelookingat you expectantly,“Right, eat. It smells amazing.”

Your mouth salivates, the rich aroma of the sauce wafts up as you bring a bite of the soft braised meat to your lips. It’s tender and savory and everything your body craves in this moment. Every subsequent bite is faster and bigger as you inhale the whole plate. He smirks, watching you the whole time. As you finish, he wipes at your face with a napkin. You must have eaten like a half-starved animal, wolfing it down so quickly. He clears away the tray and settles down with you in bed,

“Some things have happened since your imprisonment and subsequent rescue. You’re welcome, by the way.”

“Oh!Did I never thank you, my love?” You slide down to rest your head on his shoulder.

“No. But I will forgive you, this time.” You can hear his smile, “Shall I tell you all that has transpired in your absence?”

He goes on to tell you of the frantic pace everyone went about gathering information all over the city.He andShadowheartwent to your templeand weregiven a great deal of information regarding the Steel Watch, the manufacturing plant and asecret prison of hostages. Wyll had a visit from his devil patron about his father. You mention that you saw him at the coronation but not at the ball. Whatever, Wyll has his father back, and now they’re on their own mission of some sort.Gale “found”a book about the crown, it’s a prize he now hopes to claim, but for himself or for his goddess Astarion doesn’t know. Lae’zel is a rebel working with more rebel Gith to free the captive Prince Orpheus, Raphael has something to do with it. The Emperor has been adamant about gathering all the stones, the elder brain is close to breaking free of the hold the others had on it. It's also harping on about leaving the Gith prince alone. It's all rather tedious. Astarion doesn't really care for its constant intrusions. You’re relieved to no longer be the one carrying that damned thing around anymore, let it bother someone else… Karlach is more or less back to normal, people with greater compassion than Astarion spoke with her and lifted her spirits. And as for Astarion himself, well, Orin still lives but she’s willing to wait for him to bring her prize and then have a fight for the stones. He says she was rather reasonable, all things considered. Now the next thing he needs to do is search for his “siblings” somewhere in the city.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t there with you all…”After everything you went through getting back home, you were left to rot in a tower while your friends did everything.

“You had a different part to play in all of this. Without you doing what you did, I don’t know that everything else we accomplished would have gone as smoothly… It was all a little rushed, but still, everythingworked out in the end. And here you are, back where you belong.”

“Speaking of being back, how did you get this room? I thought it was forever unavailable.”You and Ana have stayed at The Elf Song many times, but only ever in the public rooms.

“Ah, yes…This was Duke Stelmane’sprivate suite,but after her untimely murder, it was left vacant along with the public rooms. Everyone else has settled inthere.”

“I see. She had a nice set up. Comfy bed with a nice view, must be quite pricey.”

“Not at all. It’s free, as it was the site of a gruesome, bloody crime committed by a Bhaalist, no less. They couldn’t give the room away, so I took it for us.”

“Sovery thoughtful of you. I take it you didn’t want the noise of the others bothering you?”

“That, and…” His lips come down to yours, teasing you but not kissing you, “I prefer having you all to myself.” Finally he kisses you before moving down to your neck.

“Ah… When… when do you want to start your search for… for your siblings?” You push at him, trying to speak coherently through his kisses and nips, “I mmm…” He pauses, coming back up to look down on your flushed face, “I may be able to move come tomorrow night, if you can keep those fangs of yours away for now.”

“Now why would I do a thing like that?” That greedy smile of his descends on yours as you let him push you down into the bed again.

Chapter 19

Chapter Text

1.

You wake late the next day, opening your eyes to Astarion standing by the window. He’s leaning against the frame, arms crossed, looking broodingly down at the bustling street below. You rise from the bed, quietly going up behind him to wrap your arms around his waist, letting your lips gently graze the raised skin of scars on his back; he no longer flinches when you touch them. He twists in your embrace, pulling you into his arms, holding you close, nosing into your hair as you lean back against him, smiling.

You’re feeling well enough; no dizziness or bouts of vertigo from blood loss. He had agreed to show restraint when it came to indulging in your blood last night, but everything else was still on the menu, so to speak.

A knock at the door interrupts this quiet moment. Astarion releases you to answer it, telling you to cover up before he gets there. You grab the first thing you see, his shirt, and pull it over your head as he slowly cracks the door open. It’s Shadowheart come to give him an earful,

“Astarion, it’s been days! Let me in!” Her voice sounds strained, irritated even.

“Hey! Shadowheart! Come in.” You call out to your friend, prancing over to the door with a silly grin on your face, wondering if it really has been days since you returned from Wyrm’s Rock. Only yesterday was the whole day you spent in bed, right?

Astarion gives you a side-eyed stare, his mouth set in a hard line as he opens the door wider, letting her in.

“Finally!” She pushes passed him so she can get to you,gesturing behind her, “This little sneak got you squirreled away before I even got a chance to see you. You all right? I mean…no one’s seen you since…”She has a pained look on her face and pity in her eyes, you know what she’s alluding to; she’s the only other person to know about your past.

“I am. I’m fine, really good,actually.”

“Are you sure? It can’t have been easy being there, as his…”

“Oh, yeah, I’m used tothat… That wasn’t the hard part. It was the confinement! I was going absolutely stir crazy in there!” Neither of them ever needs to know just how disgusted you were by him… The fool, thinking he had any right to touch you, to take you away from Astarion.

She holds your hands as you tell her what it was like being trapped in his chambers, with that horrible woman. She’s aghast at you being forced to dye your hair, she only now notices that it’s a little darker than before, hardly a difference now, really. You’re elated to hear it, hopefully with one more wash it’ll be back to its former glory. You do not mention the dead man’s desire to change your eyes, his control of how you ate, his dislike of your dancing, his contempt for what you were before nor of being recognized at the ball. You don’t know how Astarion would take to hearing any of it.

“Gods, Talia… That sounds awful. You were allowed so little…”

“Yeah, well it’s over now, and I’m just glad to be back where I belong. With whom I belong.”You smile up at Astarion, his hand brushing back your hair to gently grasp the nape of your neck.

“Satisfied?” His brow arches sharply,cold eyes looking down at Shadowheart, his lips no longer smiling.

“I suppose. I can confirm she’s alive at least. I’m almost surprised I didn’t find her half dead in the bed with your track record.” She gives him her own icy glare and you don’t understand why, she was always more sassy-sarcastic with him, never… this… She turns a happier face on you, “We’re having dinner downstairs tonight, you should join us. Maybe catch up on everything you missed?”

“I would love to! I need to properly thank all of you. I’ll see you down there later.” She walks back out the door as you smile and wave.

Astarion locks the door behind her and comes back to you. His hands tangling into your hair, is lips descending onto yours, kissing you hungrily before pulling away,

“There is something I need you to help me with tonight. I need you to accompany me while I continue my search for the other spawn. Lae’zel and I have been unsuccessful thus far, but tonight, I think we may get lucky.”

“But what about dinner? I just said I’d be there.”

“There will be another time you can see them. But I need you for this. Please.”

“Of course, my love.Whatever you need of m-”

His lips silence you as he carries you back to bed.

2.

Astarion strides over to the inn keep while you glance around the dingy dark room. There’re a few rough looking people scattered around the tables with guttering tallow candles illuminating their glowering faces, infusing the room with the smell of burning flesh. You stand in the threshold, the sky behind you beginning to lighten with the approaching dawn. You haven’t been to this part of the city, not since moving here, anyway. You know Sharess’ place across the way, but never once did you venture this far from low town; there was never a reason to. There’s no good shopping, no good taverns, at least none Ana would slum it in, and you never once wanted to travel from the city, so there was no need to return to Wyrm’s Crossing.

You crinkle your nose at the foul stench, walking further in, your eyes wandering as does your mind, trying to distract yourself from the smell of this place. You spot stairs along one wall and meander over there, slow quiet steps as you wonder what the rest of this place is like. Do they have semi-private rooms? Or are they arranged like the initiate bunks at your temple, just rows of pallet beds? You get closer, hearing voices coming from just atop the stairs, your eyes flick over to where Astarion is still talking. You know you shouldn’t wander off, but it’s not like you’re leaving the building. Astarion is going to come this way anyway… probably… Your curiosity is piqued, questions worm their way through your mind. Who else is up at this hour? And arguing no less? What are they quietly shouting about? Your foot rises and steps lightly onto the first stair.

“You couldn’t wait two minutes for me to finish?” His mildly exasperated voice startles you.

“Sorry.” Your face scrunches up and you pout before a mischievous smirkgraces your lips;he knows better than to expect you to stay put.

“Maybe I should find that bell of yours so I can hear you when you decide to wander off,” He reaches for your braid, givingit a quick little tug, “Or,better yet,a leash.” He returns that smirk of yours, grabbing your hand, leading youup the stairs towardsthe voices you heard.

He stops a step or two from the top, tilting his head, listening closely. You do the same, straining to eavesdrop; it’s a man and a woman. You can’t see them, Astarion blocks your view, but something about them gives you pause... You both hold your breath.

“We have enough for the master. No more are needed.” The woman sounds scared.

“It’s not for the master, it’s for me. I spent one hundred years eating rats and dogs, but soon I’ll be able to feast.” The man sounds excited, those words bringingto mind what Astarion told you;these people must be his siblings... The man continues, “I want someone there, ready for me. And once the Mass is done and our lord grants us our freedom. I can celebrate by drinking them dry.”

Astarion suddenly moves, releasing your and revealinghimself to them,

“Cazador promised you your freedom? And you believed him? Ha! You were never burdened with intelligence, Petras, but your load seems especially light these days.”Irritation tinges every word he speaks.

“Astarion? It - it cannot be…” The woman holds her hand out as if to touch him, you hurry to stand beside him;she pulls her hand back when you appear, her eyes questioning who you even are.

“Well, that’s no way to welcome back a brother, Dal. Didn’t you miss me?” He hurls a mocking response at her,her face growing sadder as he sneers;you know he’s never once seen them as his family.

“Why did you come back? You were free!” Her eyes look on Astarion in dismay.

“I’m here to kill Cazador. And that’s all you need to know.”

“You can’t mean that.” Her voice is quiet, incredulous.

“He’s playing mind games, like he always did. He can’t raise a hand to the master, let al-”

“You have no idea what I can do.” He cuts offPetras, grabbing him by the neck and dragging him to the window, ripping away the curtain, revealing the rising sun.

“NO!!” Dal throws herself across theroom,away from the burning light and watches in horror as one brother tortures the other.

“Where is he hiding? TELL ME!” Astarion holds Petras in the sun’s rays, lettinghis skin slowly sizzle andburn, turningto ash while his own remains unharmed.

“Brother! Please!” Dal pleads from where she cowers in the shadows.

“Tell me what I need to know. Now!” His grip tightens and you watch in anxioussilence as Petras cries outin obvious anguish.

“The master is preparing the Black Mass beneath the palace. There’s a defiled chapel hidden there.” Dal speaks rapidly, tentatively holding her hands out towards them but pulls them back, fearing burning.

Astarion drags his struggling brother over to his sister and tosses him at her feet. You finally move, havingnot really knownwhat you could even do to help. Did he even need help? You stand by his side, peering over at his “family”.

“What the hells happened to you Astarion? What are you?!” The fear palpable in Petras’voice as he struggles to stand back up with Dal’s help.

“I’m more than what I was. And I’m not afraid of anything anymore. The sun can’t harm me. Cazador can’t compel me.” He smiles savagely,his fangs almost bared,“Now go, before I change my mind about roasting you, little brother.” He leans back, cocking his head to the side, confidently defiant under their disbelieving stares.He drapes his arm over your shoulders, bringingyou in closer.

“This isn’t over,Astarion.” Dal’s final words before she and Petras vanish in puffs of red mist.

“Um… What now? They just vanished…”

“Don’t fret my sweet,” His hand holds your chin, tilting your face to look up at him, “I know where they’re going. I know they’ll go straight to Cazador and tell him about what just happened. And when they do, they’ll be trembling with fear, poor fools,” His feral smile widens, “Now we must ready ourselves to take the fight to him. Where I can then take his place in this Black Mass and emerge the Ascendant.”

“Yes, my love, of course, but…” Your voice goes quiet, almost a whisper, “Why did you bring me with you? All I did was stand here.” You lower your eyes, your question, more a self-doubting thought making its way to your mouth, than anything.

“I brought you in case they decided to pull something stupid. I may have needed that little light magic trick you know. It worked on the shadow creatures, perhaps it works on vampires, too.” He places a soft kiss on your forehead before moving on, “Now let's get out of here. This place smells of rat pissand despair.”

His sweet gesture and confidence soothe your trepidation,

“Agreed. I thought the lower city on a hotsummerday smelled awful. This place is rank.” You laugh with him and walk back to your rooms to maybe get some rest.

3.

Early afternoon comes with a knock at the door. You lazily stretch in bed as Astarion rises from his chair, placing a heavy tome down before answering the door. The door swings wide to allow the server in with a tray of food for you, they silently slip back out as you make your way to the table to eat. Astarion returns to reading by the fire as you begin to spoon the soup up to your mouth, going over in your mind what had happened earlier and how he has yet to say anything about what to do next. Halfway through your meal you quietly ask,

“What’s the next step?”

He doesn’t even look up from his book, just turns the page and answers you,

“I’ve spoken with Lae’zel and Karlach. They’ll accompany us to Cazador’s palace tomorrow.”

“So soon? And that’s all that’s coming with us?” It feels so fast and so few… How can that be it to take on a powerful vampire lord? You leave the spoon on the table, no longer able to eat.

“I cannot wait any longer, my sweet. I must do this. And any more than just a few of us I fear Cazador would bar us from entering. He would simply find some other way to capture me, to bring me back.” He’s no longer looking down at the book, instead looking at you, fierce determination shining in his crimson eyes, “He knows that we’re coming, now. He’ll set a trap; I know he will. I’m not walking in there blindly unaware. And that can be used to our advantage. Trust me.”

“I do, it’s just that…” It’s just that you’re scared, the only way he ever described Cazador was as a terrifying monster with unimaginable power, so easily able to kill…How can so few hope to take that on?

“You need not be afraid; he doesn’t have control over me anymore. Nothing will stop me from taking this away from him.” He rises from his chair and comes to your side.

“Of course, my love. Nothing will stop you.”

You turn to face him, his hands reach out to you, caressing your cheeks, his eyes filled with ambition and desire. You silently pray to your goddess; whatever pain need be visited upon you; you want to keep him safe. You’re shaking, you want to cry, but don’t want him to see how afraid you truly are.

You stand up, rising up on your toes to kiss him. He deepens the kiss, his fingers tangleintoyour hair as you wrap your arms around his waist. His lips travel down to your throat, thoughhe doesn’t bite you this time. This time he settles on kissing you, lifting you up and taking you to bed where he satiates his hunger for your body. You stamp down your fears,lettinghim take you to oblivion.

The night wears on as you lay in the bed, held in his arms, neither of you able to settle into rest. Astarion just busies his hands with your hair, combing, stroking, smoothing, twisting. His bravado from earlier seemingly wanes, you don’t know what more you can do to soothe him, what words you could say to alleviate his tension. How do you comfort someone planning on killing their tormentor? Though you had reveled in the death of Gortash, Karlach seemed to despair… Will it be the same for Astarion? You want this to be everything he wants it to be. You want him to take Cazador’s place, to ascend, to be able to walk with you in the sun once everything else is over.

You turn into his chest,nuzzlinghis smooth skin, breathing in the smell of him and whisper words you’ve never uttered before,

“I love you.” You say it so quietly, you’re not sure he even heard you. You don’t know if you wanted him to hear you.

His fingers still and you feel him starting to shift beneath you, sliding down so his face is before yours,

“What did you say?” His brows furrow, his eyes searching yours, it’s as though he doesn’t believe what he just heard.

“I said I love you,” You bring a hand up to hold his face, your thumb gently sliding back and forth, “I love you, Astarion.” It feels so strange to say it out loud…

So strange and yet, perfect. This feeling had been building up inside of you all this time, and it’s finally becoming clear to you; no one has ever made you feel this way, and no one else ever will. It’s not just desire, not just your entwined fates as Chosen, but something more, something that’s coming from deep inside of you, begging for you to be with him, always. You keep your eyes on his as he stares back at you, still not having responded to your confession. Your stomach clenches: you fear his reaction, that he wouldn't have wanted you to say that. You know it’s only because of what you are that he wants you, and it’s enough for you. You don’t need him to love you back, you only need him to keep you by his side.

“I love you, Talia.” His words are barely awhisper, “I love you, and I’m so afraid of losing you. Promise me, you’ll be mine… forever.”

“Forever and always… I’m yours, body and soul,” The words scarcely pass your lips before he covers your mouth with his, his body bearing down on yours, finding ecstasy with you one last time before dawn can break.

4.

You wait for Karlach and Lae’zel in the hall outside their room, anxiously tugging at the chainmail you haven’t worn in what feels like forever. Astarion stands by the top of the stairs, leaning against the wall with an agitated look on his face as he watches the door. Neither of you were able to get much rest last night; fear, anxiety and confessing your love for one another made that impossible. Shadowheart is the one to open the door, she looks at you questioningly before opening it up all the way to let the rest of your group out. Karlach nods curtly at you before heading over to Astarion and Lae’zel hands you your shield. Shadowheart holds out the mace she claimed from you, but before you can take it, she speaks to you, her voice strained,

“Talia, please, don’t do something you’ll regret.”

“What do you mean? We’re going to kill an evil vampire and free Astarion. What’s to regret?” Despite your anxiety and fear you know you're doing what's best for Astarion. You can’t fathom why she looks almost disappointed.

“It’s…” She stops when Astarion comes up behind you, her eyes focusing on his, “Never mind.” She looks back at you, “Good luck. Don’t die on me. I still need you to help me, remember?” Her smile is sad but genuine, as she lets you take the mace from her outstretched hand.

“Of course! How could I forget?” You smile and wave as Astarion leads you away to join the others downstairs.

As you walk with them you wonder what she meant by all of that. How could there be something to regret in giving Astarion everything he wants? Whatever makes him happy will make you happy. And of course, you hadn’t forgotten about her parents and the need to rescue them, there’s just been a lot happening, so you hadn’t gotten around to it just yet. Right?

On the short walk to the Szarr Palace Astarion tries to tell the three of you what to expect. He had been over some of it already with the Karlach and Lae’zel, but he had yet to tell you. He expects there to be thralls,charmed people guarding the place,and inside there willbe the servants…willing slaves. It’s at the mention of them that his face cringes into a look of abject disgust, going on to describe theirhopesfor Cazador to bestow the eternal gift on them,but onlyshould they serve him well enough. You understand his despising these servants; the thought of wanting to become a spawn slave to that monster bewilders you. Do they not see how Cazador treats his spawn? Do they think they’d somehow be granted true vampirism when the other spawn have not?

You make it to the servants’ entrance along the wall enclosing the upper city. This strange palace, straddling the two worlds of Baldur’s Gate, looms over you now, an imposing shadow that makes your heart beat wildly. Astarion walks ahead of you, quietly, fists swinging as he takes longer and faster strides towards the door. You have to almost jog to keep up, followed closely by your oddly silent companions; neither of whom has said much to you since they left their room. You hear the door lock clink and the hinges creak as it’s left ever so slightly ajar,

“Well, that’s not ominous,” Astarion arches a brow as he halts before the now open door, staring for only a moment before going in.

You follow him inside; it’s a grand hall with thick plush carpets, high vaulted ceilings, enormous macabre paintings, ornate fixtures, most everythingcolored dark red and gilded with gold. It would be beautiful if not for the oppressive atmosphere and strange people busying themselves all over the place. They’remumbling to themselves about everything that needs to be done, and done perfectly for their master… These are the ones that choose to be here,the foolish servants of a cruel master,

“Another guest for the master’s celebrations? I’m afraid you’re too late. You’ll have to-” A tall man with stringy hair speaks before looking up, “Master Astarion? What are you doing here? Why aren’t you downstairs?”His brows knit together, his voice sounding as though he’s frightened.

“Obviously I’m on my way down now. So, if you could point us in the right direction,” He sneers at the man.

“You’re too late. The doors have been sealed. The ritual is about to begin.”His eyes widen as he continues.

“Then unseal the doors and let me in.” Astarion’s voice grows more annoyed.

“It’s too late. Godey has sealed the doors and won’t open them again until the ritual is complete.”His breath grows rapid, his nostrils flaring slightly.

“Cazador gave the key to Godey? That sadistic old sack of bones…”

“It does not matter. You’re too late.” The man’s countenanceturningfrom meek and skittish to grossly elated, “The master will be so angry that you missed the ritual. He will do such terrible, terrible thi-”

Astarion’s hand flies up and grips the man by his throat cutting off his words. You can see his veins beginning to bulge on his forehead, his eyes growing red and tearywhen Astarion finally releases the man, dropping him to cough and gasp on the floor. Astarion looks down on him before stepping over him, looking over his shoulder and speaking to you,

“Come on. I know where to find Godey… He’ll be in the kennels…” His lip curls and his jaw clenches as he pauses,waitingfor you.

“The kennels?” Karlach whispersto Lae’zelbehind you, but she can only shrug, she doesn’t know of that horrid place, but you do.

Further down the hall Astarion stops in front of a large set of double doors. They’re covered in strange gold lettering, writing of a language you don’t recognize and a stylized depiction of a rat king: a mass of rats whose tails have become entangled, an odd fable that you can never remember the moral of. You stand beside him, looking up at all the intricacies when he mutters,

“I don’t remember ever seeing the ballroom doors closed before… And this writing…” His hand traces the foreign script, “It’s all over the house, but he forbade us from learning it…” His fingers curl into a fist before he continues on,descending the stairs, deeper into this palace.

Down the corridor, passed another crazedmutteringservant,to a hidden door that Astarion flings open,

“I know you’re there, Godey. Stop skulking and show yourself.” He barges in as the door slams against a stone wall.

“You always were sharp little one. Sharp enough to cut yourself.” A raspy throaty voice answers from around the corner, inside that dark dank room that smells of driedblood. It’s an animated skeleton in armor that rattles with every moveit makes, “Why are you here little one?”

You watch Astarion take a deep breath, steadying his temper and putting on his player’s face,

“We’re here to see the master. But the ballroom door is locked. Give us the key?”He struggleswith every word, keeping a pained grin spread over his lips.

“Ha! No. No. The doors are sealed on master’s orders. Godey will not open them for anyone, much less for you!”Such mocking intonations as he accentuates every word with a shake of its skull.

This is the thing that would torture Astarion when Cazador didn’t feel like doling out punishment himself. And you can see it’s taking so much for Astarion not to scream at this thing,

“You do realize, he needs me for his ritual. Are you willing to risk the master’s anger?”

“Godey was wondering about that. Godey knows the master was searching for you. He must have forgotten you were lost.” The skeleton’s tone shifts, sounding dismayed that the monster could be anything less than perfect,“Here, here take it.” Hedropsa ring into Astarion’s hand, “Now go to him. Help him achieve his destiny.”

“Of course.” Astarion closes his hand around it,leaving the skeleton to stay in the kennels.

You follow Astarion out of the torture chamber to where the others stand, his hand still open, looking down at the ring as you get closer.

“Will that allow us entry to the ballroom?” Lae’zel stands next to you as she speaks, looking down at the tiny piece of gold on his palm.

“It should. Godey wouldn’t lead me astray now. The master’s ritual is too important for him to try settingme up for punishment. Let’s go. We still need to figure out how to get to the defiled chapel.” He looks at you,a faint smile graces his lips before he heads back to the stairs.

You follow him up and stand before theballroom doors again,

“My love, I don’t understand…” He looks down at you waiting for you to continue, “If you’re mean to be a part of this ritual, why bar you from entering? This all feels…”

“Like a trap?” You nod at him,“I knew he would do something; I just didn’t know what it would be.” He steps forward and slots the ring into a tiny hole on the doors.

As you watch him a thoughtintrudes uponyour mind; Cazador wants Astarion alive, but alive and in one piece are two very different things. Youopen your mouth to speak, but it’s too late to say anything… Youreyes focus on the doors as they shimmer, shift and slowly open up onto the bloody ballroom and all the terrifying creatures that lie in wait,

“You! You cannot be here! No one in. No one out.” A large mangy werewolf struggles to form the words, spittle dripping from its maw.

“You’re new,” Astarion scoffs at it, “Cazador never kept guard dogs before.”

“The runaway spawn! You reek of the master’s sent! Come with us! Come to master!” It starts to turn to the side waving Astarion on to follow.

“I will not be ordered around my own house by some blow in mutt!” He’s furious and before the creature can speak another word Astarion lunges at it with a dagger gripped tight in his hand.

The blade is already lodged in the talking one’s eye before the other werewolf can react. Lae’zel and Karlach charge in passed you and you just stand there, motionless… It feels like so long ago that you last put on armor, held a shield, wielded a weapon… These past days of captivity, rescue and then that small taste of a life free from all of this with him, has dulled you. It’s like everything you’d been forced to learn on this crazed journey is just suddenly gone...

Someone is screaming…Who?

Your fingers twitch, magic gathering in them, your instincts finally kicking in, someone is hurt, and you will help them. Your eyes dart around the room, spotting Karlach with a dire wolf’s jaw clamped around her forearm, the creature only holding harder as the flames begin to singe its fur. You reach out to heal her, but she raises a hand to stop you,

“No! I’m good!” She huffs, bashing in the animal’s face then signaling you to put up your shield.

You don’t know why she’s stopping you, but you do as she asks. You stay put, shield raised, only attacking things that come directly for you. Though none of them harass you for long, one of the others always comes to your aid, whether you needed it or not. Any attempt you make to be more helpful is met with shouts to stay back or that no help is needed. And so, you watch as one by one everything in the room is killed, their blood slowly spreading over the marble floor, mixing in with the congealed puddles left from some other massacre. You look at your party’s panting, sweaty faces, wondering what that was all about. You go to Karlach again to at least look at the savaged flesh of her arm, but she shoos you away.

“Can someone please tell me what’s going on?” You look from her to Lae’zel and then finally Astarion, frustrated at being made to be useless.

“We were expecting some fighting before we got to what’s his face… but…well…” Karlach trails off,lookingto Astarion to finish.

“We need you to reserve everything for when we face Cazador. I need you to have all of your magic ready for him…”

He never finishes that thought, only leaves it lingering for you to ruminate on while you all walk through the now silent ballroom and to the door leading intoCazador’s private study. Astarion had never once been allowed in, none of the spawn had been, but it was where every one of their victims was brought for their master to feed on.

Astarion’s hand reaches out and turns the handle, pushing the door away from him, letting it swing open on silent hinges. It’s a long room lined with windows on one side and bookshelves along the other, a desk on a dais sits in the far back. You step inside after Astarion, and feel a draft, the air pulling you to a large archway off to the side, a gently swaying curtain obscuring what lies beyond it. Astarion pushes it aside, revealing a small room with a metal platform; an ancient lift that descends below the palace…

Chapter 20

Chapter Text

1.

The odd architecture of the tunnel is unlike anything you've seen before; it's harsh with sharp angles and straight lines, nothing like the curving flowing style of the palace above, or anywhere else in the city for that matter. This place is beyond ancient, it must predate the city by millennia… Did Cazador build his palace here because of this forgotten place? Lae'zel and Karlach join you in marveling at this enormous structure, more like a cathedral than a simple chapel. The three of you peer down the many halls and look at the many doors leading to ever more of this place. Astarion looks around in amazement, his eyes wide, drinking in the ominous majesty of it all,

"This all so grand. To think it was all just sitting here, lurking under the floor… Cazador would want his ascension to be somewhere with grandeur," His eyes light up, "This place feels perfect…" That last word almost purred as he holds his hand out for you.

His hand grips yours tightly as he leads everyone further in, through a heavy stone door. Down some of the branching hallways there's suspended cages, gently swaying, their chains creaking, groaning, clinking, and beneath them are yawning chasms that plummet on either side of the walkways. Why are there so many cages? What was it used for before Cazador reclaimed it from the ancient past?

It all feels wrong; like this place is hungry for something you cannot quite name, but it's there, latent in the darkness at the back of your mind, intensifying your anxiety.

Another door blocks the path forward, Astarion uses the ring to open it. The air beyond is tainted by a foul stench so strong you can taste it. Your eyes water as you swallow hard, fighting back the impulse to retch when you think you hear voices… Astarion continues walking, pulling you along into the room; it contains cells. Dungeon cells filled with people, so many people. That's what the rank odor is, the fetor of living decay. You want to move faster, wanting to flee this horrid place. As you go to push into him, willing him to speed up a quiet voice calls out,

"You. I know you." Astarion freezes at the sound of this man's softly spoken words, "You were the one from the tavern. You smiled, and joked, and got me drunk." The man squeezes his eyes shut a moment before glaring at Astarion.

"No…" Astarion finally looks over at this dirty, forlorn man, "You're dead…" It's like he can't comprehend what he's looking at.

"You called me so many sweet things. My name sounded like a lyric on your tongue." You watch the man tremble at his memory, his face turned away.

"Sebastian…" It's a mournful regretful whisper. The man was right, the way Astarion says his name sends a shiver down your spine.

"You remember me?" He looks up at you both. You can see his face clearly now; it's filthy, covered in blood and dirt and something else… Scars… A single line of them, all of which match part of Astarion's.

"You were handsome. Shy. You'd never been kissed." Astarion closes his eyes and turns away, when he opens his eyes again, they're distant, emotionless.

"You taught me how…" Sebastian's sad face suddenly warps to one of rage and contempt, "And then you destroyed me!"

He lunges at the bars, thrusting his arm through, desperately trying to grab Astarion. You knew Astarion was used to seduce and entertain the highborn, the wealthy and the powerful, but you didn't realize he also used his body like that for Cazador's victims… The man strains against the bars, frenzied, grasping, screaming, cursing Astarion. You hardly feel yourself being led away, faintly aware that Karlach and Lae'zel are following close behind. You look up at Astarion's face, his jaw is clenched, breathing heavily, his nostrils flaring with each breath. You want to say something but don't know where to start. You take a breath once you've left that ghastly room, calling up to him as you try pulling back on his hand,

"Astarion," He ignores you, "Astarion, wait!" You stop moving your legs, trying to force him to stop. He does, turning to glare down at you and you look away, quietly asking, "Why did he have scars that match yours?" You don't dare ask who he was to him.

"Because he's bound to the Black Mass, too. Through the scars. Through me." He turns and looks at the door you're about to go through, "Every one of them, in that cell, were my… victims… I recognized all their faces… And I saw those runes carved into each of them…" He clenches his jaw a moment before continuing, "He turned every one of them into spawn. It's not just me and the other six he needs to sacrifice. The devil wouldn't have been satisfied with so few. There must be seven thousand, bound to us, to the ritual through our scars. And then, when Cazador knew I was coming, he must have moved mine here for me to see them… Yet another form of torture…"

That must be the hunger you felt it here; the hunger of thousands of starving spawn, caged down here for centuries, all of their misery feeding this ominous place. The smallest, tiniest prickling of doubt drifts through your mind,

"You knew? You knew there were more to sacrifice?"

"I had thought there was more to the ritual than what Raphael told me. But I didn't know it was this… not until I saw them… And I will have to sacrifice them all if I'm to ascend." He looks down at you, an expression you can't quite read mars his beauty. You reach up, caressing his face,

"Whatever it takes to make you happy, my love." Your dark need to submit yourself to him, to do whatever he wishes, to give him everything he desires, drowns out your apprehension. What does it matter to you if he needs to sacrifice all those people? They're strangers to you. Meaningless, worthless beyond fueling your lover's freedom.

Astarion turns his face in your hand, smilingly placing a small kiss on your palm as the others finally join you in the desolate hall. Their silence unnerves you, neither had spoken in the previous room. You look back at them; Lae'zel has a face like stone, cold and hard, a soldier's stoicism. Karlach's face is twisted with rage and disgust, waves of heat rising from her skin, her eyes meet yours and all you see is contempt. She's doesn't want to be here, but it's too late to turn back now.

2.

You stand before the final door, your back to Astarion, your hands glowing softly with warm white light as you enchant Lae'zel and Karlach's weapons. Lae'zel thanks you while Karlach glares at Astarion,

"There were kids, Astarion. There were fucking kids back there in those cells."

"Yes. There were." His indifference only aggravates her more.

"Why the fuck were there kids?" She growls through clenched teeth.

"Because they too were my victims, Karlach." He holds her gaze, and she waits for him to explain, "It's not like I had a choice. It was Cazador's orders. I had to." He turns back to the door, eager to move on.

"Karlach, leave it." Lae'zel tries to warn her off.

"You could save them, couldn't you? If you just killed him, they'd be free, wouldn't they?"

Astarion rounds on her, snarling,

"No, they wouldn't be! They're starving vampire spawn, slaves to their hunger! They'd never be free!" He stops, breathing heavily before calming himself, straightening up, tugging down his armor, his eyes slowly sliding back up to meet hers, "Besides, what would you have me do? Hm? Release seven thousand such spawn on the Sword Coast? How many would they kill? How many more thousands would you sacrifice for them to go free?" He waits, but her seething silence is the only response, "Better they serve a purpose than be unleashed to cause carnage." He turns back to you and smiles, "Are you all ready?"

You nod, trying to smile back but your fear comes creeping in, more and more. Your heart races, your breaths are shallow, rapid, verging on hyperventilating. He seems so calm, ready to face down his demons, while you can barely keep from panicking now that you're so close. He is so close. Can he hear your heartbeat thundering in your chest? Can he feel the sweat beading on your palms as he holds your hand? Your futures, your very lives depend on what happens next and you're so afraid you're going to fuck it all up.

You squeeze your eyes closed, take in a shaky deep breath, exhaling a prayer to Loviatar to guide you through this. Your shield is strapped tightly to your arm, you grip Shadowheart's mace tightly in your hands as it radiates with the power of the sun, and you hope it will be enough.

Astarion opens the door and descends the stairs leaving you with an unobstructed view of the cavernous chamber. There's a monumental platform at the base of the stairs, seemingly floating above an abyss; seven pathways branching out, etched into the floor, golden grates glowing red leading to glowing circles at the end of each, a single person suspended above all of them. All of them save for the one farthest from the grand stairs; the one meant for Astarion. And at the center of it all, standing tall before a great stone sarcophagus, grasping a menacing staff topped with a winged devil, is the monster himself, Cazador.

You force your legs to move, following behind him, Lae'zel and Karlach's heavy steps behind you echo eerily around you. There're other creatures surrounding Cazador; werewolves, ghouls, undead, all manner of horrors, all of them snarling, viciously awaiting your arrival.

You want to reach out and hold onto Astarion, but you know you shouldn't, not right now. Instead, you chew the inside of your mouth, tasting blood. You can see him clearly now, Cazador, his sharp Elf features and terrifying red eyes. He stands confidently, watching Astarion come closer, his voice tinged with an accent you can't place,

"Is this truly our prodigal son? Hm?" His eyes follow Astarion as he comes to a stop, hunching, readying himself to strike, but Cazador's eyes grow fearsome as he shouts, "Do not slouch before me, boy! Have you no respect for yourself?" Astarion flinches, clenching his fists in response, the monster's words drip with disdain, "Look at you, crawling back after abandoning your family. You should be begging out forgiveness."

"Forgiveness? You've never forgiven anything. Every mistake, every slip was punished!" Astarion shakes, embittered rage pushing out his words.

"I strove for perfection in all things. Even those as imperfect as you." He gleefully accentuates imperfect, "A pity you amounted to so little, despite my efforts." His head tilts back so he can look down his nose at Astarion.

"No! No. Fuck you! And fuck everything you ever did to me!" His voice tightens, issuing the venom built up from centuries of torment suffered at Cazador's hands.

"They told me you had changed. I dared not believe it… Oh, thankless child. Did I not bless you with our immortal gift? Did I not make you what you are?" His smile is a cruel and mirthless thing, he bears his fangs, and his eyes gleam maliciously.

"You son of a bitch!" Astarion lunges forward, raising his fist, taking aim at Cazador's grinning face.

It's too late. Cazador smashes the point of the staff down onto the ground, the strike sparking a reaction, glowing waves emanate from him, arresting Astarion's motion. Your eyes widen, seeing glowing circles appear around Astarion's wrists, Cazador's triumphant voice rings out,

"You truly forgot my power. You truly thought our bond as creator and creation was all that stopped you from killing me. Oh… You are weak, my child. You are a small, pathetic little boy who never amounted to anything." Astarion grunts, struggling against the hold of this demonic power and you just stand there, frozen, "But today, you will finally do something worthwhile. You will burn, and I will ascend." He waves the staff, sending Astarion flying back, the magic of this damned ritual stripping him to reveal the scars on his back.

"No! Stop him!" Astarion's voice barely reaches you, but before you can process what's happening your body begins to move.

"Witness the birth of the Vampire Ascendant! Ecce dom-"

"NOOOO!" The scream rips from your throat, your magic gathers in your hands; a great burst of blinding light as you throw a tiny sun up into the air and run to Astarion.

Cazador screeches, throwing his arms up as you run past him. Lae'zel sprints to your side, attacking anything that tries to block your path. You bring up your shield, barreling through the grasping claws of the creatures filling the platform, all of them trying to stop you from reaching him. One of the things grabs your shield, yanking you off course. You rip your arm free of the straps, feeling some of the muscles in your arm snapping. You twist your body, evading what you can, but it's not enough. Claws gouge the back of your thigh, through the chainmail, splitting your skin and rending your flesh. You keep running, the searing pain fueling you, your dark goddess empowering you through your suffering.

You reach Astarion, throwing your arms wide, hugging his legs to you tightly as you fling yourself back and away from the glowing prison. You had expected more resistance… You're suddenly weightless, falling backwards before slamming into the ground, smashing your head on the metal grate, seeing stars. His body crashes down onto you, knocking the air from your lungs. He rolls away as you writhe on the floor, gasping for air, reeling from the blow to your head.

He's standing over you, but your vision is blurred, you don't know what's happening. You feel for your mace, trying to hand it up to him so he can defend himself, he snatches from your hands as you stay down. After an age of stumbling, trying to stand, you find the strength to push yourself up, shaking your head to clear it, trying to ready yourself for whatever comes next.

You look around, frantically trying to take in everything that's happening around you. Lae'zel is locked in battle with two werewolves, you can see blood pouring down her leg from a gash on her side. Karlach is wildly swinging her great ax at some undead, gagging and coughing on the noxious fumes surrounding them. Your heart drops: you don't see Cazador… Your body snaps to where Astarion was just standing behind you. He's there, locked in battle with him.

Cazador's skin crackles, sizzling, splitting under the light of your magic and anywhere Astarion manages to strike him with the mace, but still he fights; almost as though he feels no pain. His eyes are wild, crazed with malice as he lashes out at Astarion, ripping at him with his nails. You want to rush to his side to help, but you're unarmed. Your shield was ripped away long ago, Astarion wields your mace. Everyone is struggling. Everyone is wounded and your healing won't be enough to help win this fight… Nothing short of a miracle will help you now…

You've never once asked for your goddess' intervention in battle before, but maybe, as her Chosen, she will hear you, she will come to your aid. You close your eyes, focusing on where that thing gauged you, concentrating on the excruciating throbbing of your leg, letting it wash over you, offering it up to Loviatar, beseeching her… If only ever this once, please…

She answers your prayer… Her power flows through you, a conduit for a wave of protective healing. It pulses out from you to all your friends, to your love; all of them revitalized, healed, protected…

And then She's gone, leaving you with whatever reserves you had before calling upon her. The heady feeling of the divine fades and you look around; Karlach is rushing to Astarion's side, leaving behind the bodies of her foes, Lae'zel is striking down the last of the werewolves, her eyes already focusing on joining the others against Cazador. All three of them, filled with renewed strength bring their wrath down upon the vampire lord. He fights back, but only briefly, shrouding himself in mist and disappearing into the stone sarcophagus before they can defeat him. You can barely stand; your legs shake uncontrollably, and all you can do is watch. Astarion stalks over to it, shoving the lid violently off,

"NO! No, no healing sleep for you!" He grabs hold of the prone vampire and throws him out, "Wake up!"

Cazador scrambles on the floor, dazed,

"Get your hands off me, worm!" He struggles to kneel, resting on one hand as he speaks.

"Ha! I'm not the one in the dirt," He looms over Cazador briefly before stooping to pick up a vicious looking dagger that had clattered to the floor when he was thrown down. He looks at it, almost like it's familiar, before looking back at Cazador, "And now, to finish the ritual you started."

"You think me a fool? That I would allow anyone to usurp me, speak the words and ascend in my place? Hm?" The defiant audacity of this monster, kneeling taller, as though he were still in control, "The runes I carved into your flesh bind you and all seven thousand souls to the ritual. Complete it and those bearing the scars will be sacrificed. You included. You were simply a means to an end. I made you to be consumed." The final word hissed out as he bears his fangs in a twisted vaunted smile.

"I am so much more than what you made me." Astarion stands proud, triumphant, towering over the kneeling man. His eyes look for you, finding you on your knees just behind him and he smiles at you, "I need your eyes, my love. In a manner of speaking."

"What do you think you are doing?" The monster stutters out, looking confusedly between you and Astarion.

"Unmaking what you made me." He glowers down at Cazador, then his eyes find yours again, knowing you'll do whatever he asks of you, "Use the parasite. Link your mind to mine. Through your eyes I can see my scars and copy them onto him."

"You would not dare!" Cazador shouts, unwilling or unable to accept that he has lost.

"I would. And I will. You will be consumed and all the power you've lusted after will be mine." Astarion bares his own fangs in a rapacious grin.

You close your eyes, feeling the warm tendrils of Astarion's mind reaching out to yours and you welcome him in. Everything he feels now floods into you; the weight of the dagger gripped in his hand, an all-consuming hunger, and an overwhelming lust for this power… You open your eyes, focusing on the scars on his back, taking in every detail so that he may repeat is on the cowering Cazador.

"Yes. Yes, I see it!" You feel his smile, his excitement as he looks down and you see Cazador through Astarion's eyes.

Astarion reaches down, forcing Cazador to twist and turn so that his back is to him, tearing the doublet off, exposing the unmarked skin of his back. Cazador whimpers his protests, struggling, trying to crawl away but you know what to do with bastards like him. Your hand reaches out, grasping the air in front of you, feeling yourself enclosing around him, gluing him to the spot, utterly motionless. Astarion brings the dagger down onto his flesh, scratching, scraping, carving out every intricate detail and you smile malevolently, relishing the screams of his agony.

And then it's done, his mind and yours disentangle, leaving you watch in excited anticipation. Astarion stands, admiring the bloody scrawl before he walks over to where the bedeviled staff lays on the floor, lifting it reverently,

"Time to take your place." His words are a sinful whisper. He looks down at his onetime tormentor, taking a moment to exult in his victory before waving the staff, sending Cazador to where he belongs.

Astarion stands at the center of the ritual, speaks the words of the infernal pact and you watch, awestruck, as your love takes what is owed him. A red glow emanates from under the golden grates, surrounding him, bathing him in its beauty and you bask in its light. The cries of seven thousand souls rises, melding together, a grand crescendo, drowning out everything. And out of the corner of your eye you see your companions slinking away at this momentous occasion. You cannot understand why they wouldn't want to watch Astarion claim his freedom. But it doesn't matter. Nothing else matters. Only he matters.

The glow dissipates and he's left standing before you, resplendent in his ascendancy,

"I, I can't feel it. That ache in my stomach, that hunger, it's gone." He looks to you and joyously exclaims, "I'm free… I'm finally free! Oh, it feels delicious."

"My love, you did it!" You manage to stand, to run into his open arms.

"I did." You crash into him, and he wraps his arms tightly around you, "We did." He breathes in the top of your head, staying for a few moments, "Come my love, let's get out of here!" He scoops you up and walks away, leaving behind the bloody altar of his newfound freedom.

3.

He carries you away; passed the now vacant cells and empty cages, down the long halls, back to the ancient lift where the others stand in tense silence. But you hardly notice them, you keep your face buried in Astarion's neck, feeling his pulse against your lips, marveling at the warmth now coming from him. No one speaks as he steps off the platform and into the study, continuing on through the palace; they simply leave, wordlessly walking out the front door.

He continues on, the servants now quickly scurrying away from him, allowing him to pass unmolested, to an opulent room. There he sets you down beside the bed, his fingers sliding up the back of your head, gripping your hair,

"Are you ready to join me in immortality, my love?" His grip tightens, his eyes searching yours, looking between the amethyst and jade of your mismatched eyes, waiting for your answer.

"Truly? You'd make me yours? Forever?" Breathless trepidation quiets your voice; this is the only thing you want, to spend eternity wrapped in his arms.

"Yes. We will be together, forever. Until the world falls down." He kisses you deeply, passionately.

"I love you." Your breath mingles with his as your lips barely part.

"And I love you, my sweet."

His hands move swiftly; deftly removing your armor, dropping it to the floor, lifting your chain mail up over your head and discarding it, tearing open your tunic so he can slip his hands underneath, pushing it, letting is slide off your body. He lowers you down onto the soft bed so he can tear away everything else, leaving you naked and breathless. Your own hands helping him to remove what he was left wearing, leaving him as naked as you. He descends on you, kissing you again and again before he leans up just enough to look in your eyes again,

"You have given me everything… Thank you."

He brings his mouth to his place at your neck and bites. It's sharper than before, a renewed strength to it that makes you gasp. His hand teases you, pinching a nipple before traveling down your body to where his fingers find you wet and hot. They push in deep and swirl, his palm presses against your clit, making you squirm as he continues to drink you in.

He breaks away and brings his mouth to yours, kissing you, sliding his warm tongue in and you taste the metallic tang of your blood; you want to taste more. But his lips leave yours, making their way down your body, each kiss a bite that lingers before moving down again. His fingers continue their teasing, bringing you closer to the edge. His other hand slides up your thigh to brush your only scar, his mark, your dirty little secret. He brings his fangs down into it again, opening it, deepening it, tasting you.

He stops before you cum, eliciting a whimper at the denial of release. Instead, he brings himself back up to your face to look down on you. Your vision is clouded with blood loss and unresolved lust, but you see his eyes clearly; they look at you with such intensity, such desire,

"I will drink every drop of your blood, my love," He cups your face, dragging his thumb over your lower lip, his own lips descending to whisper against your neck, "And the pain will be your greatest pleasure."

"Please." Is the only word you manage before he bites down on your pulse and slides into you, filling you as he consumes you.

It's tortuous, impassioned, violent and you cry out, overcome by the euphoria of this decadent agony. And through it you feel Her, your Maiden of Pain, blessing this moment. With every thrust Astarion swallows more and more of you. Your body shudders, divine splendor mixing with it all; your mind begins to fade, the void coming to claim you as you imagine eternity with him…

Chapter 21

Chapter Text

1.

You wake in the arms of the man you love, the man to whom you will now belong to, forever; and you feel glorious. Keeping your eyes closed you take in the warmth of him against your back, the smell of his skin as you snuggle into his arm beneath you. Your eyes open and the world comes into sharp vibrant focus. Every one of your senses feels stronger, every color more vivid, every smell more fragrant, every sound clearer. You can even hear his heart beating, his blood flowing through his veins… It's intoxicating and… your stomach grumbles.

"Already hungry?" His breath tickles your ear as he stirs, "I shouldn't be surprised. You always were insatiable."

"And what's that supposed to mean?" You retort in mock irritation.

"Nothing my love," You roll in his embrace to look at him while his eyes take in every detail of your face, "Huh… They stayed mismatched…"

"What?" You take a moment to puzzle out what he means, "Really?" You sit up, excitedly looking around the room for a mirror, "I want to see!"

But then you stop yourself; you can't see them… not anymore. Your hand moves to touch your face, your fingers tracing the outline of your lips, your tongue tentatively sliding along your new fangs, as you realize you will never see yourself again. Your fingers drift down to feel for your pulse only to feel… nothing. The place Astarion loved most is now dead and cold. Your fingertips find the now permanent divots of his bite. Your hand falls away landing in your lap as dread begins to fill your mind.

"Whatever is the matter, pet?" He sits up to look into your dejected eyes.

"I'm…" You're what? You are exactly what he wanted you to be. An immortal vampire just like him, only nothing like how he is now, only like how he was, "I'm yours still, right? …You still want me?" You fear he'll hate the coldness of your skin against his, the change in your eyes, your sharper bite, or worse, your inability to walk in the sun.

"Of course you're mine. I saw to it that you would be mine forever. My beautiful immortal consort." He caresses your face, wiping away the tears that began to fall, "Nothing will ever take you away from me."

You smile into his impassioned kiss and let him push you down into the bed. His hand travels down your body, gripping you roughly, leaving behind bruises, as you moan into his mouth. You open your legs to him, his body ready to prove that his desire for you hasn't changed, if anything it has only deepened. He thrusts into you with renewed ferocity making you cry out at the force of it. Gods, everything feels different now, so much more intense than ever before.

He pins your wrists to the bed, his fags digging into your new scar as he continues to vigorously plunge into you. Your body quivers, your fingers curl, your nails dig into your palms as you lose control and cum. But still, he ravishes you, his onslaught unabating as your body floods and pulses around him erratically. His hand moves to tangle into your hair, pulling your head sharply to one side as he continues to drink and you grasp at him desperately, whimpering,

"More…"

And he obliges your wanton plea. He rips away from your throat, your blood dripping from his lips onto your chest, as he licks his bloody mouth and looks into your eyes, he's just as ravenous as you. He grips the back of your legs, spreading them wider holding them down and rolling his hips. You arch your back, angling yourself to feel him rub against your clit with every move of his hips. You begin to writhe, trying to hold on longer, the pressure building until it's too much. Once more he slams into you and your body squeezes around his cock, spasming wildly, making him groan as he bends to taste your lips, joining you in your little death.

You curl into your nook at his shoulder as he strokes your hair. Your thoughts wandering to when he told you of how he was turned. You remember him saying how much it hurt when his heart stopped, that it took days for the change, that he was buried and had to claw his way out, and once he was freed, he retched up congealed blood only to be consumed by a hunger that's never satiated. Nothing like that has happened to you so far. You wouldn't expect him to bury you, but everything else… Has it been days? You've felt no need to retch. You weren't wracked by pain; not that that would have bothered you the way it did him. You are hungry, but it isn't an all-consuming hunger like how he described. Why?

"There's something different about how you made me your spawn, isn't there?"

"Don't say that my love. I don't like that word." You look up at him confused, "You're not just some spawn. You're my consort. My most beloved treasure. You will not refer to yourself as something so lowly again, understand?"

"As you wish, my love. I'm not your spawn," You draw out the forbidden word and he glowers at your cheekiness, his hand tangling into your hair, griping fiercely, "Ahh.." You bite your lip, enjoying his ire, but he releases his hold, so you to snuggle back down, "Sorry… But I'm right, aren't I? Something's different."

"Yes. Everything is different for you," He keeps his hand in your hair, gently rubbing your scalp as he continues, "I drained you dry, and at the height of your delirium I gifted you one drop of my own blood."

"But what does that mean? What will be different? Will I be able to walk in sun?" You pepper him with nervously excited questions as he chuckles softly.

"It will be no trouble to extend a fragment of my protection to you. I want you by my side, always. And I cannot have that if you are only able to be with me in the dark of night."

"I suppose. You certainly don't like being denied what you want," He gently tugs your hair at that, making you smile, "What about my eyes, my love? …What do they look like now?"

He tilts your head to look up at him, staring into them for a long moment,

"They're perfect… One is dark and deep, like a most precious ruby and the other… like stained glass in the sun."

"And what about you? What's different for you? Aside from you being so very warm?" You lean in closer, nuzzling his chin.

"Many things… and more that I have yet to discover. All of which I shall tell you, but first we should dine."

He slips his hand from your hair, reaching over to the bedside table and rings the little bell that sits upon it. Not long after one of the servants you hadn't seen before enters holding a large tray. There's a plate of roasted meat, vegetables glistening in a pool of melted butter and slices of fresh crusty bread. Alongside the plate is a large golden goblet and a bottle of wine that clink together as the servant sets the tray down on a table. Then they scurry away wordlessly and close the door. You slip out from under the covers and walk over to the table to look upon this sumptuous meal. Licking your lips you scoop up a bite and bring it to your mouth… You pause, your hand suspended in the air as you look at the fork; the thought of opening your mouth and putting it in disgusts you. Your lips turn down and you sneer at the offending food. Astarion chuckles behind you,

"No, my love. That's for me," He pushes your hand down while reaching with his other to grasp the goblet and places it in your hand, "Thisis for you."

You take it, looking down at the dark thick liquid inside; it's blood… Your mouth begins to salivate, you bring it up to your lips and gulp it down greedily. Astarion takes hold of the goblet, pulling it away from you as trails of blood trickle down the sides of your mouth to your neck,

"Slowly, love. Slowly," You gasp, reaching out to take it back, to drain the other half but he puts it just out of your reach, "You mustn't gorge yourself. You'll only retch it up if you drink too quickly."

"But… it's so good…" You pout at the denial of that delicious elixir.

He simply laughs at your dismay, wiping your messy face before settling down to eat his own meal. He sits with the plate before him, holding the fork and knife awkwardly, his brow furrowing as though he's not sure where to start. How long has it been since he's eaten food? Used utensils? It's your turn to giggle at his ineptitude, and though he turns an angry face to you, you only smile and slide into his lap. Once there you take away his fork and knife, proceeding to cut his food, balancing small bites on the back of the fork and placing them in his mouth, sweetly feeding him. His hand strokes the bare skin of your thigh, the other twists a lock of hair as you both enjoy this silly little domestic moment.

2.

You wake for the third time, still in this room, still with him. You don't know how long you've been sequestered here; there's no windows and time has lost all meaning. All you have done is indulged his every appetite, for you, for your body, for your blood, and you have loved every moment of it. But not this time… This time he leaves the bed, dresses and dons his armor. He's planning on doing something, though he hasn't told you what. You cast your gaze around the floor, searching for your long-discarded things, but aside from your chainmail everything else lays in tattered shreds… You hold up the scraps of your tunic to your chest when Astarion turns to look at you,

"Don't be absurd, pet. You'll not be wearing anything like that again," He waves at you to drop it and so you let it slip from your fingers back down to the floor in a crumpled heap, "I'll have them bring you something more suitable while I'm out." He kisses the top of your head before heading to the door.

You watch him go, feeling so utterly alone. You climb back into the bed, watching the fire slowly die when there's a soft knock at the door; it's the servant from earlier. She whispers that there's a bath ready for you and an ensemble to wear after, then she silently walks over, holding out something for you to wear now. You stand, smiling at her as you slip it on. It's a lovely white silk gossamer dressing gown that ties closed with a wide sash around your waist; it floats about as you follow her down the hall. She leads you to another room with two beds and a corner hidden by a folding screen; that is where the hot bath waits for you.

You toss the dressing gown over the screen and happily slip into the scented water, sliding down, fully submerging yourself in the warmth. You sway your head beneath the surface, your hair swirling in the water before you come back up. Opening your eyes to the servant girl standing there, a proffered tray of sponges, soaps and oils ready for you to use. You take a sponge and soap, lathering the sweet-smelling bar, it, along with the water and oils smells of lilies, your favorite.

You emerge from the bath, patting yourself dry and anointing your skin with the oil, breathing in the sweetness. You walk over to one of the beds, there's a dark green silken tunic dress with matching slippers laid out for you. It's a little too big for your petite body, but it is quite comfortable, just needs to be tied tighter. The slippers are just right, soft and supple fabric that molds instantly to your foot.

You return to your room. It's been cleaned; the dishes have been removed and the bed made, even the sheets have been changed. You smirk, thinking that's probably for the best. Astarion's bites have grown more vicious, leaving you a bloody mess and your body has become so much more responsive to his touch, another mess that would need cleaning… You shake your head, clearing it of such thoughts and walk over to the vanity.

You sit on the small, padded stool and reach for a brush. Before you can bring it to your hair it is gently taken from your hand by the silent servant girl. She brushes your hair until it's smooth and shines like polished coral. You luxuriate in the softness of her touch as she finishes, placing the brush back on the vanity. You turn to look at her, to thank her only for her to cower back, her eyes glued to the floor.

"You don't have to be scared. I'm not going to hurt you," You softly speak to her, tiptoeing to her, leaning down to see her face, but she turns away, "Really. I'm not…" Poor thing, must think you and Astarion are going to be just like Cazador. You straighten back up, pondering if maybe she can show you around, "Do you know if there's a garden here? I can't imagine a palace as grand as this doesn't have one."

You turn away from her, letting her stand and walk over to the door where she motions for you to follow her. She guides you through the palace, up to the now sparkling clean ballroom to a small door leading out to an overgrown little patch of green; it must have been beautiful once. There's a stone gazebo, paved paths, the remains of a tiny hedge maze and all the overgrowth is that of sweet-smelling flowers. You leave her standing silently by the door as you explore this secret garden.

You stop and smell every bloom you pass, able to name most of them, each reminding you of your aunt's hollow tree surrounded by every flower she could find. The bushes of the maze have spread too much for you to walk those paths, so you make your way over to the gazebo. Inside is an ornately carved stone bench and with just a little clearing away it's suitable for you to lay on and listen to the birds twittering around the grounds. Their songs remind you of Ana, wondering how she's doing, hoping maybe you can go to The Chateau for a visit soon. You spare no thoughts for the ones you had called companions and friends just days ago.

You're unsure as to how long you lay there but at some point, you drift off in the warmth of the sun, dreaming… A shimmering figure stands before you, the visage of your goddess, Loviatar. She beckons to you, calling you to return to the place of your conception, to the place of your birth, to come to Her. She leaves you then, the loss of Her divine presence waking you. You blink in the glare of the setting sun to see Astarion standing over you, a smile on his lips and a golden goblet clasped in his hand.

He waits for you to sit up, but you take your time; stretching languidly, spreading your hair over the bench, letting it cascade over the edges, your dress riding up to where your legs bend at your hips and you rock them back and forth suggestively, his eyes following your every move,

"Must you tempt me so?"

"Yes." A teasing smirk graces your lips.

"Tsk. Tsk," He arches a brow and purses his lips as you sit up, "You should drink, my sweet. You must learn how to live with this new hunger," He holds the goblet out and you take it, drinking deeply but not ravenously, "Soon I think you'll be able to leave without fear of attacking the first person you see."

"The hunger hasn't felt like how you said it would, my love," You gesture at the silent girl by the door, "She's been with me all day and I've felt no need bite her."

"Is that so?" He turns his eyes on her and furrows his brow.

"So maybe I can go out tomorrow? I want to go to The Chateau. I think I've been summoned…" The dream from moments ago felt unlike any dream you've had before. Astarion's eyes question you, "I believe Loviatar was calling to me just before you arrived."

"I will think on it, pet," His hand caresses your face, and you nuzzle into it, "It seems you enjoyed this sad little patch of dirt out here." He looks around, dismayed by the shabby conditions.

"I have," You smile and look around at the little walled garden, "Shame it's been neglected for so long. I can only imagine how lovely it must have been."

"Then it shall be yours to do with as you please," You look up at his indulgent smile, "It is after all our palace."

"Ours?" You only thought to stay here for a short time before returning to The Elf Song. He was concerned about you being around people so soon after your change, "But I thought this place belongs to the Szarr family. Surely, they would have something to say about us squatting here?"

"I have made the necessary arrangements. It is now the Ancunin Palace. It is ours, my love." The devious satisfaction in his smile sends a shiver down your spine as the reality of it settles in; this mansion is now your home, with him.

You jump up into his arms and shower him with kisses. He takes the opportunity to carry you back down to the room that is now yours and his.

3.

The fire pops as you stand before it, warming your body, waiting for the great bath to be filled. Astarion wishes to have you join him, and though there is the room you used earlier to bathe, he is uninterested in going in there. He wants nothing to do with any of the other rooms until all vestiges of his former life in them have been erased. As soon as there's sufficient water in the tub you shoo away the two men hauling buckets and close the door behind them. You creep over to the where Astarion lounges in the bed with his eyes closed and you whisper to him that it is ready. He smiles, getting up to follow you to the bath and he settles in, waiting for you to climb in. You nestle between his legs, leaning back against him, relaxing into a peaceful soak.

His hands roam over your body as you tip your head back to nip at him. He grips you roughly and groans as you slip a hand behind you, taking hold of his cock, sliding your hand up and down, squeezing lightly, your thumb tracing a small circle at the head every time your hand goes up. He leans forward, biting down on your shoulder, drawing blood before kissing you. You relinquish your hold on him, letting him turn you to straddle him. His hands hold your hips, guiding you down onto him, taking him in to the hilt before you begin to roll your hips. Tight tiny circles as you rise and fall, circling one way then the other. Enjoying the friction on your clit your eyes close, your hands gripping his shoulders.

"Eyes on me, pet." A devilish command from your love as his hand slides up your body to your neck.

Your eyes flutter open, he's watching you find your pleasure using him, a look of possessive pride in his eyes as he holds your gaze. You want to close your eyes, but you can't look away. Your hips move faster, your climax inching closer and still he looks into your eyes. You begin to tremble, you're so very close. His hand at your neck shifts, grasping you, his thumb pressing down just above his mark, his fingers gently constricting ever tighter. Your lips part, your breaths panted out as he bucks his hips up into you, his gaze intensifying. The water sloshes out onto the floor as your fucking escalates. You can't hold on any longer. You tighten around him, quivering, digging your nails into his flesh, crying out as you cum. He pulls you down, going in for another bite, drinking you in as he empties himself deep inside of you.

You stay like that, breathing heavily, the heat from the water and the pleasure making you lightheaded. He brings you in closer, wrapping his arms tightly around you, continuing to drink. And then, all too soon, he takes his fangs away and you whimper. You curl down to nestle into his neck, feeling his pulse thrumming against your forehead, his hand slips up the back of your head, cradling you and you wonder how you could be so lucky to have this life.

You sit up in the bed waiting for Astarion to join you; he still hasn't said whether or not you can go to The Chateau. You want to go as soon as possible, you have never been summoned by Loviatar before, and it wouldn't do to keep Her waiting. Davora did say that you are Her Chosen, but it still doesn't feel like you are, or at least you don't know how it's supposed to feel being a Chosen. You grow anxious thinking about it when he finally slips under the covers with you,

"So, about me being able to go out… can I?" You turn to him as he settles onto his pillows, raising an arm for you.

"Where was it you wanted to go again, pet?" His eyebrows rise in question, still waiting for you to go to him.

"Just back home- No, sorry. To The Chateau. I don't think I should keep my goddess waiting." You give a pleading smile before settling into your nook.

"I think that may be permissible. So long as you take an escort from among our servants. You will need to have a proper lady's attendant soon enough. And possibly a guard or two. For appearances sake."

"OK." You think a moment, other than your silent shadow from earlier you haven't interacted with any of other servants, "That girl from earlier, I can bring her with me. She seems nice enough. Maybe she'll even speak this time."

"Very well, I'll allow it. You may go to see your goddess, find out what she has need of you for, then come home. I'll be out most of tomorrow. There is much that I have to take care of for this whole brain thing to be done with."

You had forgotten all about that… How could you have forgotten? You had been trying so hard to rid yourself of that damned parasite… and then you lost yourself these passed days with him. Nothing else mattered, not even that. It's such a daunting thing, a monumental ordeal, a task so far beyond your capabilities. And so far-removed from the life you had been living, from the life that you want, from the life that you tasted here, with him. Even still, you were helping… you were even improving, becoming an integral part of the team. What happened? …Astarion ascended… That's what happened. You never wanted adventure. You never wanted to be a hero, or anything of that sort. At every turn you were miserable and just wanted to go home. Your only comfort had been Astarion and finding your destiny with him. Something that had already been set in motion before your abduction. Before that fucking elder brain stole you away from everything. No, you want nothing more to do with that mess, that world no longer matters to you. Let Astarion handle it. If he wants you to join him, you will, but barring that it is no longer your problem. You can finally go back to what you were before: a carefree city girl.

4.

You stand in the foyer of the palace, waiting for that meek girl to come open the door for you. Astarion insists that you no longer need to do such menial things, like opening doors, dressing yourself or even brushing your hair. Honestly, the hair thing is nice, this girl has a gentle touch and since you no longer have a reflection anything more than a simple braid is beyond you. But waiting on doors seems a bit much. She finally comes scurrying out of the study, Astarion's study, now that it has been cleared and cleaned. She bows to you,

"Sorry for making you wait, mistress." He voice is hardly even a whisper, but it's sweet.

"It's nothing to worry about. Let's go." You smile even if she doesn't look up to see it.

You step out onto the sun-soaked street and breath in the sweet scent of the upper city, your attendant swiftly moving to walk ahead of you. There're flowering plants lining every street and growing abundantly along the walls of every palatial home you pass. How many of these manses have you seen the inside of and not know it? You laugh to yourself, if only Ana was here to speculate with you. But you will be seeing her soon enough. You almost skip the entire way to The Chateau.

A smiling initiate opens the fate for you and ushers you inside. They step away as you sit on a stuffed bench, beckoning for your attendant to sit with you, but she shakes her head vehemently and stands beside you instead. A few minutes pass and the initiate returns to take you to Davora's office, your girl is told to wait where she stands.

You're led to the door where you knock, waiting to be invited in, but your impatience doesn't let you, you walk in moments after knocking. Davora sits at her desk fussing at some papers, she looks up and smiles warmly, shaking her head indulgently at your impertinence,

"Welcome back, my child. Or should I be addressing you as My Lady?" She gets down and comes to greet you, pausing in front of you, taking in the site of you, "And I imagine some congratulations are in order?" Her eyes fix on yours, having already noticed their change.

"I suppose so, but please don't call me 'My Lady'… That's just wrong coming from my Truescar." You scrunch up your face in distaste, waving away such a formal title.

"As you like. You do look magnificent, Talia. Even if those clothes of yours are ill fitted. Does the new vampire lord not have the means to dress you properly?" Her eyes look you up and down ashamedly.

"Oh, no, that's not it. Its hasn't been that long and there's a lot he has to take care of, and I haven't had the time to go shopping. These were just things in the palace that were the closest to fitting me." You don't mention that this is the first time you've left your palace, or that you haven't had much need for clothing recently.

"So, I see," She holds out the fabric, rubbing it between her fingers, appraising its worth, "It is fine cloth. Perhaps you can simply have these remade to suit you more. No sense in wasting such luxuries. Fabrics like these are rare and expensive. Tell Figaro over at his boutique that I sent you. He will be happy to have the latest Lady give him patronage."

"Thank you." You're excited to have an excuse to go to Facemaker's.

"Now, why are you here? Other than to take up my precious time and steal away with Ana?" She sighs, only mildly exasperated.

"I believe I was summoned… I think I need to go to the inner sanctum."

She hums to herself, holding her chin and nodding,

"Then I best show you down," She shuffles over to the statue behind her desk and moves something, causing the statue to slide back, revealing a spiraling stone staircase going deep into the ground, "Come. Best not keep Her waiting."

You hurry after her as she lights a candle and begins her decent. The walk isn't as long as you'd thought it would be, the stairs end abruptly at a heavy wood door that she pulls out a key to open. She pushes it out away from the steps then holds out her hand for you to go in ahead of her. She keeps her head bowed as you pass. As soon as you're in she wordlessly reaches over and closes the door behind you, plunging you into complete darkness. Your eyes strain to see anything, but there's no need. A moment later a soft glow begins to emanate from the foot of a large and truly imposing statue of Loviatar. The light does not even reach to the head, but you can make out every detail. She stands tall and fearsome with sharp features, wild and loose hair streaming down her back to her hips, a flowing robe draped elegantly over her figure and a nine tailed flail held aloft.

You bow before stepping onto the hallowed ground. You can feel Her there with you as you approach the obsidian altar stone. On it you see a flail matching the one in the statue's hand; you know what to do. You disrobe, neatly folding your dress and placing it on the alter stone. Then kneeling before the statue, you strike your back with the flail, drawing blood and a reverent whispered plea for her to grace you with her presence.

"You have come at last, my eternal Chosen." Her voice echos in the chamber, a darkly rich sound that makes you tremble.

"My Maiden of Pain…" You look up to see her before you, a misty figure, almost incorporeal and yet somehow perfectly visible in every detail, "You summoned me? What would you have of me?"

"Rise and hear me," You stand before her, childlike in your size compared to Hers, "You are now ready to know your destiny as I have designed it to be."

"My Lady, please… if I could ask you something?" You wait, fearful your interruption will have angered her, but when she doesn't speak you continue, "Why did you never come to me before? If I have been your Chosen since my birth, why did you never summon me? Never speak to me as you are now?"

"You were not ready my child. And you never needed to hear my words to do as I wished. You always followed your darkness. You never denied what I made you to be. You only ever needed my blessings, or their withholding to guide you." Her smile is a proud thing as She looks down on you.

"So, you were guiding me, all this time? You were leading me to Astarion?"

"He was not always the intended for you, but even as a god, I have no direct control over mortals. And many have seen fit to thwart My Lord Bane and myself." Her voice grows icy, steely as she gnashes her teeth at being hindered by mortals, "But that is no longer of concern. You have accomplished much and more for me and mine. You only now have to serve me as you have always done. For the rest of your immortal life, all your pain is mine to feast upon."

"Truly? That's all you would ask of me as your Chosen? Just to continue paying homage to you?"

"Yes child. All I require from you is that you remain by the side of my beloved's Chosen. Serve him as you serve me, and you will fulfil all that I desire from you. He is your Lord and Master. Heed him as you would me."

"As you command, so shall I obey." You drop back down to your knees at her feet where she graces you with a touch on your head before you feel her presence vanish.

Chapter 22

Chapter Text

1.

You reach out in the darkness, grasping for the door, but Davora is already opening it for you. You don't know how she knew you were there or that you were ready to leave. She remains quiet, leading you back up the stairs to her office. Only then does she speak again,

"So, She has given you Her decree?" There's a solemnness to her words and face you're unfamiliar with.

"Yes. She only wan-"

"No." She interjects, not allowing you to continue, "Do not tell me. Her words to you are for you and you alone. Should She desire I know anything more, She will see to it that I know. Her call is not unfamiliar to me," Davora closes the way down and sits in her overstuffed chair, sighing wearily before turning a smiling face on you, "Now, I do believe Ana is waiting for you upstairs. She's been an absolute mess since your abduction and can barely contain herself now that you've returned. Go. Have fun. I know the two of you have missed each other a great deal."

"Thank you!" Finally, you can be with your friend again, "I'll make sure she gets back in one piece!" You wink and rush to the door.

"It was never her I feared coming home in pieces mind you!" She calls out after you with a mirthful shout.

You run up the stairs, elated that you need do nothing more than live the life you are living now. For it was Loviatar who created you to desire these things, you only need to follow that desire for pain and for him to appease Her. You find Ana anxiously pacing in the foyer when you come bounding in. She sees you and rolls her eyes,

"Why is it that anytime I'm anxious you're the most giddy ridiculous thing imaginable?"

"Because… what was it you called me? An empty-headed dim wit who's only saving grace is that I dance prettily enough?" You smirk up at her, batting your lashes as you link your arm in hers.

"And I am still yet to be proven wrong," That sweetly vicious smile of hers wavers as she looks at your eyes more closely, "It's true!" She takes hold of your face turning it this way and that, "Davora said you'd been turned… It suits you… But…" Her eyes glance at the sun's light shining through the windows.

"How did she know before I even saw her? This is the first time I've left the house! And she told you?!"

"How does she know anything? Honestly, it is frightening how she knows all the good gossip before I do." She pouts a little, "And the whole sun thing? Is that just not how it works?"

"Oh no, it is, but… Uh…" You don't know how much she knows about what's happening, so you think it's best not to bring up that convoluted mess, "It's a whole weird thing, I'll tell you all about it some other time, I promise. But, for now how about you come see my new house? You'll never believe it!" You giddily start pulling her towards the door.

"Excuse me, but I seem to remember you promised me drinks the next time I saw you. We best be heading to The Elf Song before we go anywhere else!"

"Oh yeah! But, um… I don't think I've brought any coin." You scrunch up your face apologetically.

"Please…" A tiny voice calls to you, "Mistress… Master Astarion insisted you come straight back to the palace…" She timidly looks up at you while whispering.

"Oh, it's fine. You don't need to worry about it," You wave away her concern, "We'll only be there a short while and then we'll go straight back after," You smile pleadingly at this quiet mousy girl, "Do you have any coin? I'm sure I'll be able to repay you as soon as we return."

"Yes, Mistress…" She reaches into her tunic, producing a small velvet bag heavy with coins, "But this was only meant to convey you home should a carriage be required."

"One may very well be if I have anything to say about it!" Ana snatches the purse and shoves it down the front of your ill-fitting dress, "Let's go already!"

You laugh at Ana's brashness; she never did like being told what she can and cannot do. You stride, arm in arm, out the door and onto the main road, chatting happily all the way to The Elf Song.

2.

The inside the tavern bustles with people loudly drinking and cavorting as you and Ana search for a place to sit. Most every table is taken, the few empty ones are covered in abandoned tankards and goblets, and the bar is overcrowded with city guards fresh from their patrols. You scan all along the back and that's when you spot her,

"Hey, Shadowheart!" You wave at her, walking over to where she's hovering by the door to the kitchens.

"Talia?" She looks at you as though you were a ghost, "What happened to you?"

"What do you mean what happened to me?" What is she on about?

"We haven't seen you in days! I've been worried sick. Where have you been?" Her voice is strained, rising a bit.

"At home…" How long has it been? Surely not that long.

"No, you weren't. I went to The Chateau, and you weren't there. You were supposed to help me." There's such an accusatory tone to her words. Why?

"No silly, I was at Astarion's home, well our home now. And of course, I'm going to help you, I haven't forgotten. I was just waiting for you to tell me when, and what we needed to do." Has Astarion not said anything about what's been happening?

She turns away a moment, clenching her fists before turning back to you, striding closer, looking into your eyes. Her face crumples, her hand hovering at her lips as she gasps,

"Gods… I knew it… He did it… He really did it… You'rehis spawn?" Her voice trembles with disgust, her eyes shimmer with tears as she looks at your changed eyes, backing away from you.

"Yes, he did… Kind of… But it's not…" Why is she looking at you like you've betrayed her? Nothing's changed just because he turned you, he doesn't even want you calling yourself his spawn.

"It's not what?"

"It's not like how it was for him. He hasn't done anything to me. He hasn't forced me to do anything."

"How would you know? Would you even be able to tell me if he had?" She berates you for things you cannot fathom to be true. Astarion would never treat you the way Cazador treated him.

"That's- That's not fair, Shadowheart. This was the first day I've been able to leave," Her eyes harden at that, "No, that didn't sound… It's not… It's because he was afraid, I might hurt someone, because of the hunger, but I'm OK. I'm back to normal. I can help you now." You reach out to her, but she takes another step back, even further away from you.

"Forget it. I don't need your help." She turns on her heel and storms off up to their rooms.

You follow behind her, calling out for her to please listen, but she slams the door in your face. Why won't she just listen to you? You can explain everything, nothing bad has happened. She's just overreacting. You can explain. You grasp the handle and throw the door open…

Shadowheart stands with Gale, weeping into his arms. He turns an unforgiving glare on you, holding Shadowheart tighter. Halsin sits on the floor with little Yenna and all the animals that had been rescued. The little girl looks at you almost as though you were a stranger, even Halsin looks as though he's seen a ghost…

"Oh… I'm… I'm sorry." You bring your hands back into you, gripping the fabric of your dress, looking upon the once friendly faces of your companions.

You suddenly feel so very out of place here. You've never stayed in these rooms with them. You haven't been with them for everything that's happened since reaching Wyrm's Crossing. Nothing of what they've been through is a shared experience with you. You were gone for all of it. You didn't even try to be there with them, for them, and they all know it…

"Oh! You've returned to Us! To all of us!" That strange little intellect devourer scurries over to you, the only one happy to see you.

Halsin moves to stand, like he may come to say something to you, but before he can she turns to you,

"No, she hasn't. She was just leaving." Shadowheart's voice is bitter, her eyes devoid of any affection as she watches Ana come up behind you, gently leading you away.

"Come on Talia…" She holds you close and walks you down the stairs to the waiting timid girl, "You should take her home. I think she'd rather be there than here right now." She turns to you, holding your face in her hands, forcing you to look at her, "I will come over tomorrow. You're in that creepy old place on the city wall, right?" All you can do is nod, "OK. Tomorrow. I'll be there."

You walk blindly back to your home, that quiet girl walking ahead of you. The whole way you struggle to understand why Shadowheart, why any of them were so callous to you. Was it because you're now a vampire? But they had been traveling with Astarion this whole time, and they all knew what he was. So, why would you being one make any difference? Was it because you were gone so long? You hadn't meant to be. Astarion needed to make sure it was safe for you to be around others, he knows better than any how dangerous a hungry vampire is. So then, why? What did you do wrong?

The door is held open for you as you slowly walk into your home,

"Where were you?!" His voice echos furiously in the hall. His hand flies out to grab your arm the moment you're through the threshold, "You were told to come straight back from The Chateau! Where did you go?" He shakes you violently, his eyes then focusing on the timid girl, "You were instructed to bring her right back here!" She cowers, backing away, "ANSWER ME!" He shouts at her. But she says nothing, only scrunches down further into her hunched shoulders as you let out a restrained sob, softening his fury with the sound, "Why are you crying? What happened?"

"...They hate me…" You look up at him bleary eyed, dejected, grasping at the soft velvet of his clothes as your body shakes.

"Who hates you, my love?" He releases your arm to hold you close to him.

You try speaking but can't calm yourself enough. How could you feel so wretched after having felt such joy? You press your face into his chest, keening as he rubs your back. Your misery slowly ebbs, his gentle touch and Her blessing calming you, letting you gather your thoughts. You stay wrapped in his warm embrace as he patiently waits for you to speak,

"I'm sorry, my love. I didn't mean to disobey you… After I saw Her, after She told me what She wants of me I went to see Ana. I invited her here, but she reminded me I owed her drinks, I didn't think you'd mind if we went to The Elf Song… And I saw Shadowheart… She… She was so mad at me, and I don't know why."

"And? What did your goddess ask of Her Chosen?" He smooths your hair behind your ear, completely ignoring that you said anything about Shadowheart.

"She told me to stay by your side. To obey you as I would Her…" You look up into his eyes, they're shimmering with his wicked desire for your complete devotion to him, "But our friends… they…" And then those crimson eyes shift, irritated contempt darkening them.

"I have never called any of them 'friend', Talia. They have always ever been a convenient means to an end. To get what I want. They are the best chance I have at ridding us of these parasites. Once this mess is settled, I won't have any use for them. I have new plans for us, and they do not involve any of them. You were the only one of them that I desired to keep. And now that I have you, there's no longer any need for you to participate in any of this, nor to trouble yourself with their personal affairs," His hand moves to caress your cheek, "I will see to it that this… alliance continues until the brain has been dealt with. At which point I will cut all ties with them, and enact my plans for our glorious future, my love."

"But Shadowheart… she's my friend," He may not have seen them as friends, you may not have either, but she was different…

"No, she isn't. For she does not want you to be happy, pet, not truly. She wants you to abandon your goddess as she has abandoned her Dark Lady. She wants you to 'be better' than the darkness within you. Since Moonrise she has done nothing but try to keep you from me, and I won't have it."

"I don't understand. She's never said anything to me that would make me think that." She wouldn't want that, would she? She laughed with you when she promised she wouldn't be like the other Selunites… She's different… Isn't she?

"Oh, my sweet little love, I did not allow her to say anything of the sort to you. But she never lets me hear the end of it. All she ever does is demand I free you from whatever hold it is that I have on you. Ha, she even tried insisting that you deserve better than me, the fool. But she never knew, did she? That it was you that had entrapped me? That it was always you that had the power to make me want you? That there was no resisting you?" He comes down to his place, his mark on your neck, breathing in the scent of your skin and you shiver into his touch.

"I'm sorry… You know I didn't mean to… You told me that it didn't bother you…" You're still worried he'll hate you for what your power makes him do, he pulls away to look down at you again.

"It doesn't. For without that power, making me more of what I always was, I do not think I would have been able to accomplish all that I have, and all that I will. Without your power, I would still be a slave to- I would not have become the Vampire Ascendant. I meant it when I said that you have given me everything," His thumb brushes over your lips and you let the sensation quiet your fear, letting his words sink into you, "And that absurdly meddlesome cleric should not trouble you anymore. None of them should. I will see to it that none of them ever disturb you again, my love."

"You won't hurt them, will you?" You tighten your fingers into his coat.

"Hopefully there won't be a need for that. I'm certain I can impress upon the rest of them that you are off limits. Even the Emperor has seen reason and no longer hounds your thoughts while still keeping you from transforming. You need not fear. I will protect you." His lips come down to yours and you know your little transgression has been forgiven. Your fears and doubts begin to melt away with his kiss, "You only need concern yourself with your little garden, getting some appropriate gowns and -"

"What of Ana?" You didn't mean to interrupt him, but with the loss of one person you'd considered a friend you cannot bear the thought of losing her, too, "She's been my friend since I came to Baldur's Gate. Surely, I can keep her?"

"You are impertinent, aren't you?" He tightens his hold on you a moment as you weakly smile at him, "Yes, you can keep her. Those from your temple, from your life before, I have no objections to. If anything, they should be kept close. They know of what you are, what you are meant to be, and they will not deny me you."

3.

Astarion had spent the remainder of yesterday indulging in you, erasing all doubts lingering in your mind about those people: they're no better than strangers to you now. You lay in the bed, letting your fingers retrace his touch, your mind filling with memories of the sensation. You miss his warm fingers dancing over your cool skin, the delightful pain of his kiss... Sighing, your eyes flutter open and look longingly at the door. He had to leave you, he has work to do. Although… you smile to yourself, you have your own work to do…

You get up and ring the bell to summon her, Maya. The silly thing was so apologetic for your disobedience yesterday. She was so fearful that you would punish her, or worse, that Astarion would. But he's gifted her to you as your lady's attendant, her treatment is yours to decide, and such harshness is not your way. You've never felt that pain inflicted on the unwilling was worth the effort. Pain should be welcomed, not feared. So, Maya's only punishment had been for you to tell her she's stuck serving you now, to which she bowed even deeper than usual and told you her name at last.

She rushes in with your goblet and a dress for you to wear. You take small sips as she dresses you and brushes out your hair. Now all you have to do it wait for Ana. Maya had offered to send someone to fetch her, but Ana's not fond of being summoned. So, while you wait you decide to explore this expansive palace in search for a room with windows that would be suitable as your new bedchamber. Astarion seems to like the sun in his study, you imagine he'd like it in the bedchamber even more. He does so love the way your hair looks in the sunlight.

There seems to be a large room on the other side of his study, perhaps you can have a door put in to join the two. Its windows are currently boarded up and covered in thick drapes, you will have to have someone come in and take it all down. And instead of having the bed brought up, perhaps you can have a new one ordered. You need to find what style pleases him most, so far all he's said is that he requires silk sheets. The one's you have now are luxurious to be sure, but he wants what he wants, and you will do whatever you can to give him what he wants. You call to Maya, asking her to bring you some paper and a pencil, you need to write all your ideas down. Eventually you'll put them all together and ask Astarion what he thinks. You're hopeful he'll be pleased with you trying to make this old mansion his perfect home.

The stone bench is nice and warm from the sun, it's a lovely spot for a break; your hand had started to cramp from all your notes and sketches. You look about, starting to plan what you will do out here when Maya brings Ana out to you. Her eyebrows arch sharply as she regards your new home,

"Not bad. Not bad," She gives a sly smile, "Though this sad excuse for a garden is not instilling me with a sense of nature's boundless beauty."

"Hush you! I only discovered it the other day, I have yet to make it bloom," You stand, hugging her close, "Thank you for coming… I'm sorry… about-"

"I'm going to have to stop you right there, Talia. I don't care about not getting drunk off my ass with you. Or that you had someone else you called friend behind my back," You open your mouth to speak but she shushes you with a finger to your lips, "I care about whether or not you're alright after that… You never had more than me as a friend here… You looked so broken… I've never seen you like that before." She lowers her finger, allowing you to speak.

"I wasn't OK…" You sigh, blinking away tears, "But I am now… I didn't mean to replace you."

"Idiot, you didn't replace me. You tried to make a new friend and it just failed spectacularly." She gives a sassy little head shake then smiles softly, "I'm sorry it didn't work out with her."

"Me too… I thought the two of you would have gotten along. I wanted you to meet her. I couldn't wait to get home so I could get you two together and see what trouble we could get into at the taverns. But then something changed with her and she… She wasn't the same. I don't think that as she is now, we'd even give her the time of day. She's aSelunitenow." You curl your lip in mild disgust, mockingly drawing out what she has become.

"Eeeww! Gods, she's one of those? How did you ever manage to tolerate her?"

"She wasn't one when I met her! She was darkly funny, and sarcastic, had an air of superiority to her. She was a Sharran for Maiden's sake!" You breathe heavily in exasperation, "And now she wants nothing to do with me and I don't want anything to do with her," You shake out your hair and smile up at Ana, "So, now I guess it's back to just being the two of us. And I wouldn't want it any other way. Also… I have a favor to ask of you," You give her your best pleading look, pouting lips and all. She just rolls her eyes at you, waiting for you to ask your favor, "Come to Facemaker's with me? We can go to The Maid after for drinks or come back here. Either way we'll get absolutely smashed! Promise!"

"Fine," She links her arm with yours, bumping you playfully with her hip, "But I say we come back here. I don't want a repeat of yesterday."

"Fair point. I don't want a repeat." You bump her right back, giggling.

Maya leads the way while you're followed by one of the men from the palace. He's been loaded up with a hefty bundle of all the clothing you liked the fabric of but that are in dire need of remaking. Almost every garment you found was too conservative for your tastes. A few of the more rustic pieces you found will be perfect for when you want to work in your garden or slum it with Ana; no sense in ruining the nicer things you've found.

Ana gossips endlessly about all the goings on at the temple and of the few masquerades you've missed. She mentions that large oaf of yours was quite miffed about you being absent. You're adamant that he is not 'your' oaf. She laughs and continues on. He would follow poor Ana around just hoping to catch something, anything about your whereabouts. All while his little friend was beside himself with the loss of that silver tongued harlequin, bemoaning his absence as well. She knows, of course, who the harlequin is, smiling knowingly,

"So, how silvered is his tongue?"

"Ana!" You flush, like some silly little girl.

"What? He must be something else to have you so besotted."

"Well…" Your mind instantly brings up this morning and all you want now is to go home and await his return, "He is magnificent… I have never felt such delicious pleasure before."

"Do go on! I simply must have details." There's a conspiratorial gleam in her eyes as she pulls you in, letting you whisper to all the dirty details in her ear.

You match her zeal, indulging her curiosity as you continue on your walk. No sooner than the shop comes into view does she swoon with you, relishing the intimate peek into your life now. She dramatically fans herself as you enter, exclaiming she'll need a drink now if she's to get through this errand. You shove each other playfully as Maya scurries away and the man with you goes to the counter with his bundle.

"Welcome mademoiselles!" The man himself, Figaro, comes to greet you, "May we interest you in a glass of champagne?" He holds out a hand and one of the store attendants proffers a tray with two glasses already filled. Of which Ana immediately takes both, downing one, placing it back on the tray, and then holds the other close to her chest, "I see the Lady's friend has quite the thirst. Another!" He waves the attendant away as he turns his focus on you, "My Lady Ancunin, it is a pleasure to welcome you to my humble boutique. Madam Davora sent word that you would be paying us a visit. And I do believe Lord Ancunin has opened an account here for you. Please, browse at your leisure as I appraise the garments you've brought. I must be sure they are worthy of being draped on one such as yourself." He bows with a flourish and excuses himself.

"Well… that's not how I remember him treating us when we came for our Paramour fittings. He could barely give us the time of day, just foisted us onto his clerks." Ana sidles up to you, talking quietly while leaning into you.

"I know… I don't even know if I'm supposed to act like I did before or if I need to put on airs…" Your eyes drift down to the glass she's holding, "How's the champagne?" She gives you a sip, it's expensive, sweet and fruity, "Mmm. That's lovely. Give me that." You smirk, attempting to pull it from her grasp.

"Get your own, fancy girl! I'm only ever going to have this good stuff when I'm out working or with you!" She elbows you away and turns to look over her shoulder, sticking her tongue out at you.

You both laugh ridiculously. You have so much fun just being with her again. How did you ever survive without her?

The attendant returns with another glass and a newly opened bottle, Maya following on his heels. You hardly noticed her scuttle off earlier.

"Mistress, the proprietor is ready for you. Many items are suitable for cutting down and remaking to your specifications, but he requires your measurements. Please, this way,"

You follow her upstairs, Ana in tow, to the private fitting room. It's a place you haven't been since your fittings for your debut; it feels like a lifetime ago now. You glace around the room, noticing all the mirrors have been draped in heavy cloth, a single pedestal awaits you in the center of the room. Maya helps you undress behind a folding screen, and you put on one of the larger garments, going out to stand on the pedestal.

The thing is folded, pinned and fussed at by Figaro as his assistant scribbles down every word he mutters. He wraps a measuring tape around different parts of you, tutting under his breath about something, the attendant humming and nodding response, jotting down it all. Figaro smiles, going on about the alterations he will be making to everything, assuring you that you will be the envy of every noble Lady in the city. All the while Ana helps you take sips from your glass, always making sure both of your flutes are filled. He tuts and nods one final time before he relinquishes you to Ana and Maya's care.

You stand there waiting, about to ask Maya what's keeping her when she walks over to you with something draped over her arms. It's a lovely silk gown cut in a way you would almost find perfect; a plunging neckline to just below your breasts, a single slit cut high above the hip and the back left almost completely bare. Its color is a light shade of jade green patterned with hand painted flowers. Red spider lilies… lycoris lilies.

"How did you know?" You gingerly reach out to the dress, awe carried on your quiet reverent words.

"I told her, when I spotted it downstairs. It made me think of you. Of us. Of our short time spent as Paramours together… I'm gonna miss having you as my partner." She sniffles, holding in her tears, "I waited for you, hoping that you'd come back and that when you did it would all go back to how it was before… And I know it can't, but we're still the best of friends. And that's enough for me." Ana holds you close, her arms wrapped tightly around your shoulders as she rests her face next to yours.

It's the sweetest of brief moments with your best friend, your sister. She pushes back away from you, insisting you wear the gown home. Then she abruptly turns away to down the rest of the champagne in her glass and then the bottle. Maya slips the dress up your body, you wish you could see yourself in it. All you can do is look down, smoothing the delicate cloth and admire the way it hugs your hips. Ana and Maya both smile and nod approvingly. You close your eyes and smile, wondering what Astarion will think of this new gown on you.

Chapter 23

Chapter Text

1.

Figaro continues to be quite obsequious; bowing and assuring you that everything will be ready in only a week's time then sent over to your palace post haste. None of your kind words about there really being no need to hurry fall upon deaf ears. Ana laughs, she's convinced he's putting a rush on it because you're the newest Lady in town and he wants you to be a loyal customer. You question whether or not he recognized either of you; it's certainly not the first time the two of you have been there. Ana points out that you may as well be a whole new person. You're now the lady of a vampire lord, even if he doesn't know that part, you are still a woman of rank and wealth now. Your previous life has no bearing on what you are. You shrug, guessing that is probably the truth of it. You look down at your new gown, continuing to marvel at how it moves, fluttering around your legs as you walk. You can't thank Ana enough for spotting it, it's perfect.

Maya holds open the door, suggesting that the two of you retire to the ballroom. She's probably right to suggest there. The parlor is yet to be touched, the study is only for Astarion's use, and the day grows late so it's too cold in the garden for Ana. Although the ballroom feels ridiculously large with just the two of you in there, but it will have to do.

You ask Maya to bring food for Ana and a couple bottles of wine along with glasses. Ana eyes you like you're being silly, saying she'll drink straight from the bottle if it's all the same; you giggle, agreeing glasses aren't needed. You laugh and talk for hours. The first two bottles are drained, the third well on its way to being emptied when her eyes suddenly light up,

"I know!" Ana jumps up, her brows furrowing as she searches the room for a moment, "Do you have any instruments in this place?"

"You know, I don't know? We must. Caza- The previous guy would host lavish parties, there must be something. Hold on," You turn to the open doors and shout, "Maya!"

She comes rushing in, bowing briefly,

"Yes Mistress?"

"Do you know if we have any music… musical instruments?" Some words elude you, but you get there eventually.

"Yes Mistress!" She smiles brightly and scurries away, quickly returning with a lyre.

Ana's eye light up as she takes it from Maya's outstretched hands. She begins to fuss with it, tuning it and warming her voice. Once she's satisfied with her preparations she stands, wobbling a little before gliding over to the stage, sitting on the edge where she begins to play. The notes fill the room, wonderful familiarity to them as you realize it's the song from your debut. The melody brings back such warm memories of that night and your body starts to move. The same dance from that night, every step carved into your memory like a river through a canyon. Your eyes close, imagining that night again; the magic of it, the night Astarion first saw you, the night this whole new life of yours began.

Her song comes to an end and your body stills. Panting and smiling you open your eyes to look at her, but she looks at the door.

"It truly is a shame I never got to have a private dance from you before." He grins at you from the doorway.

"Astarion!" You rush over to him, where he welcomes you into his arms and kisses you hungrily, "How long were you lurking there?"

"Long enough, my pet." His fingers caress your neck as his eyes flick over to where Ana sits, "Perhaps your friend will indulge us another song?" She obliges him, her fingers dance over the strings, her sweet voice filling the room once more. He pulls you in close to him, moving you around the floor in a graceful dance, "You look delicious in this dress." His hand wanders from your waist to your lower back and then lower still.

"And what do you think you're doing in front of my friend?" You arch a brow, smiling coyly at his desirous touch.

"Enjoying that which is mine to enjoy." He stops the dance to kiss you again, both of his hands drifting down to grasp hold of your ass, squeezing until you unexpectedly moan into his mouth.

"And that would be my queue to return home." Ana stands, setting the lyre down and smirking over at the two of you.

"Oh! No, wait Ana." You break away from the kiss to stop her, then look back up at Astarion, "Can we send someone to walk her back to The Chateau? I don't want her alone on the streets at night."

"As you wish, my love. Come, follow me," He takes your hand and leads you out of the ballroom, down the hall and then finally out the front door, Ana following close behind. He releases his hold on you and stands facing out into the darkness of the night, "Watch." He smiles, focusing on some distant spot, his hand raised slightly.

You and Ana look at each other questioningly, a distant howl answering your curiosity. Your eyes widen, for soon after the howl fades a great gray dire wolf emerges from the shadows, padding silently over to Astarion's side. You stare in surprised awe at this beautiful creature. Ana looks from it to you to Astarion and then back again in silence.

"She will do nicely, I should think." Astarion ruffles the fur of the great beast, grinning at your stunned faces.

"Oh, that is nice!" Ana walks over to get a closer look, "No drunken buffoon is going to even try approaching me with this beauty walking next to me." She beams, also reaching out to touch the soft fur.

"What?" You look at him dumbfounded. Since when could he do that?

"Some of my new-found powers," He smiles at you, using a finger to closer your agape mouth, "I am beginning to speak the language of the night," He then holds his hand out to the sky and a moment later a raven alights onto his arm, "And I think, this one shall do for you, pet."

"Me?" You blink in astonishment, whispering your words as you tentatively reach out, gently stroking the glossy ebony feathers, "But… what is she for? I mean, she's gorgeous! What do I need with her?"

"A moment, first, we should be sending Ana on her way." He looks over at her expectantly, dropping his arm so that the raven flies up to perch on the gate.

"Yes, of course. I am over tired from a grueling day of being with you, Talia," She smirks, and you smirk right back, "I'll send word with my next day off so we can spend it drinking in your sad little garden. Alright?"

"Any time, Ana. I can't wait to make you dig in the dirt with me." You giggle, a little maniacally.

She merely rolls her eyes at you as she turns to leave, waving her final goodbyes, the wolf walking beside her. You watch them walk for a few minutes before Astarion pulls you in closer, gesturing up to where the raven sits above you.

"She is your messenger bird. Should you need me, send her. She will find me," You look up at him puzzled, why would you need to send for him? He strokes your face, "It is time, my love. We face the elder brain tomorrow," His eyes are hard, his jaw tensed, and you want to say something, but he continues, "Listen to me, Talia, do not leave the palace tomorrow. Do you understand me?"

"Yes. I understand. But… what about Ana?!" She doesn't know the danger there could be tomorrow. Your eyes focus on her receding figure.

"I have told your Truescar, Davora will see to it that everyone there will remain safe. The inner sanctum is underground, no? They can hide there if needs be. As for your raven, send her if there's danger here, I will send help." He grasps your face in both hands and looks intently into your eyes, "Talia, I need you to obey me this time. I cannot lose you. All that I have gained, all that I have planned, it will mean nothing if I do not have you by my side…"

He kisses you. Such a demanding, needy kiss. You cannot disobey him in this. He would never forgive you if something happened.

2.

You return to your room. Astarion calls for a bath followed by a late supper for him. You lay in the bed as he eats, your mind vividly imagining all the worst things, the haze from wine making the images all the worse. You try to think of something, anything else, but you just can't. You can feel his gaze on you, all you can do is squeeze your eyes shut and turn away. You don't want to make him worry, not now, he needs to have a clear mind for tomorrow. But try as you might your mind keeps spiraling. You chew the inside of your mouth, drawing blood with your fangs, willing away the tears that threaten to come. You don't even notice him crawling into bed until he's over you,

"Whatever is the matter, little love?" You dare not speak, gently shaking your head, keeping your eyes closed, "You have nothing to fear on my behalf. I am the Vampire Ascendant. How could I possibly lose?" His voice brims with brash certainty.

You open your eyes as he caresses your cheek, a single tear escaping, despite your efforts,

"I know, my love. I know. But I can't help being afraid for you. I can't bear the thought of losing you…"

His lips come down to yours, silencing you. He deepens the kiss, his hand sliding from your cheek to your neck. His thumb circles the little scars he gave you as he breaks away from your mouth, bringing his fangs down into them again. The sweet sting a comfort beyond anything he could say.

His hand slides to the back of your head, lifting you up, turning you both so you are atop him, his fangs pulling out of your neck. You straddle his hips and look down at him, your blood at the corners of his roguishly smirking lips. How could you ever think to doubt him?

He brings you down to kiss him as you move your hips to let him slide up into you, gasping into his mouth at the sensation, your hips beginning to roll forward and back. You sit up and ride him, your hips moving at an increasing pace. His eyes light up watching you. His hands glide all over you, grasping at you, roughly gripping the softest parts of you, leaving behind streaks of red, and spots of black and blue. The sounds he makes as you continue to work your hips drives you closer. Your fingers curl into fists on his chest as you shiver into your climax.

He rolls you both, holding himself over you, his hips now rolling, continuing to make you cum. You can't take any more, your whole body shakes, feeling like it's on fire. You cry out, begging and pleading, but for more or for him to stop, you don't know which, you just whimper,

"Please… Astarion…"

He lowers himself, kissing you, biting you, driving you mad with desire. You don't know how long you manage to hold on, but soon enough his teeth find their place once more as he finds oblivion in you.

He stays wrapped in your embrace, his fangs no longer piercing you, but his lips are still pressed to your neck, breathing in the scent of your skin. Your fingers twirl his soft curls around and trace his scars, trying to memorize them by feel. You let the warmth and weight of him laying on you be a comfort as you smile, blissfully content. When he shifts to lay next to you, you curl into your nook, letting him play with your hair now. He brings a lock of your waves across you both, twisting it around his fingers, marveling at the shifting shades of red in the firelight. You're unsure as to when, but you both eventually fall into a deep, peaceful rest.

You're woken by his kisses. His hungry, demanding kisses, his bite, and his body sliding into yours. You arch back into him, reaching behind you to pull him in closer, relishing this unexpected pleasure. Never opening your eyes, just letting yourself get lost in this brief lustful moment with him. He noses down into your neck, inhaling the scent of you both, finding his bliss in you.

He moves away, his body leaving yours as he climbs out of the bed. You let him slip away, wanting him stay with you but knowing he can't; it's time for him to prepare. You sit up, bringing your knees to your face, watching him get dressed. Your throat grows tight, your eyes sting with a need for tears, but you hold it all in. You don't want to be a sobbing mess before he goes.

He sits down for his breakfast, you sit beside him with your goblet, staring blankly at it for a long moment. But before he can reprimand you for not drinking you take up the goblet and swallow half of the blood within it. He only smiles at you as he finishes up and stands, his hand held out to you… it's time for him to leave.

You walk with him through the palace, your dressing gown billowing behind you as you struggle to keep up. On he leads you, out the door and to the gate, where he stops, your raven fluttering over, perching nearby. Astarion turns to look down on you, his eyes devouring the glimpse of your exposed skin at the open front of the gown. He pulls you in closer with the ties, kissing you passionately, his fingers tangling into your loose and wild hair before he steps back,

"Gods, you're beautiful," Those hungry crimson eyes looking into yours, nothing but confidence shining in them, "I will come back to you."

One more kiss on your forehead and then he turns to walk away. You stay to watch. Before you know it, he disappears down the road, out of sight, no longer able to hear your sorrow. You sob, having held in all your tears until now, and you let them fall freely.

3.

Who knows how long you stand there before Maya eventually takes you by the hand, leading you into the palace and out to your little garden. She sits you down on the stone bench, leaving you to your thoughts: none of which are helpful. All the things you imagine are too horrific to put to words and it's killing you. You have to stop. You have to distract yourself. Your eyes drift around you, focusing on your little garden.

You lurch forward, stumbling over to a flower bed where you proceed to rip up old dead plants with your bare hands, heedless of soiling the pristine white of your dressing gown. You let the bite of thorns and the sting of pulling vines be a small comfort as your mind slowly clears, becoming fully absorbed in your work.

Maya quietly steps out onto the path leading to you, your unfinished goblet held in her hand. Timidly the little thing holds it out to you, her voice softly calling out to you,

"Please mistress, you must finish drinking."

"I'm fine," You attempt to wave her away, but when you look up at her she seems so distraught. On second thought, you decide to appease this silly girl, gulping down the rest, "There. Done."

"Thank you, Mistress." She beams before scurrying away again like the little mouse you're slowly being convinced she is.

You use this little interruption to take a break. Sitting back on your heels, letting your head fall back to stretch and look up at the trees and sky. Amongst the leaves you spot the raven Astarion bestowed upon you. She puffs up, ruffling her feathers, reflecting the bright sunlight off of them. She takes flight, floating down to be beside you, letting you stroke her back and tickle the top of her head. She's wonderfully comforting to have nearby.

You roll your head, ready to continue when you're suddenly overtaken by an excruciating pain burning behind your eye. The voice of the nether brain reverberates inside your skull, commanding you to change, to transform…

You writhe and scream, pressing your hands to your eyes, trying to stop the worm inside your head from squirming. And then it stops, leaving you gasping in the dirt. You lay there for but a moment, rolling over to look up at the sky. Blinking up at the sun as the raven squawks, hopping over to you when the ground begins to shake violently beneath you. The raven takes flight, circling above you as your fingers grasp the vibrating ground. You frantically look around from your place sprawled on the floor. You hear stone cracking, falling. Your eyes search the walls of your home for signs of damage and that's when you see it in the sky above you… The elder brain, free of whatever underground prison it had been held in and your stomach drops…

The shaking as stopped and so you scramble to your feet. The sky begins to darken with plumes of black smoke rising from all around the city. Giant portal open across the sky, great giant red dragons pouring through, spewing fire upon the soaring tentacle ships you had seen at Moonrise. There's agonized screams of terror and pain coming from every direction. You run inside, checking that no servants had been injures, none are hurt. Maya is terrified, she tries to grasp at your gown as you run outside, towards the cries for help. You can't quite explain why, there's this feeling deep inside that you need to help them. All of them. Everyone in the upper city.

You sprint passed the frightened faces of your staff, out beyond the gate to the first person you see on the ground. Falling hard on your knees beside them, reaching out, your hands already glowing, the man screaming incoherently at you as you try desperately to help him…

It's too late. You couldn't understand the man's garbled words: a warning. You never saw the mind flayer. Not until its tentacles begin to spread out, entering the periphery of your vision, the sound of its maw opening send a shiver down your spine. You try to switch from healing magic to something that will damage it, but you can't do it quickly enough. You raise your hands, a pathetic attempt to shield yourself, and close your eyes…

A hot wet splash of silver blood sprays across your arms, hands and face. Your risk opening your eyes, seeing a sword jutting out of the monster's chest before it's yanked away and the creature crumples, dead. A tall smiling man stands behind it,

"Looks like you could use a little help, My Lady," That idiot from the coronation, from your time as a Paramour, is the one who just saved you, a smug grin plastered on his face.

"Yes… Thank you…" You're not sure what to say. Your hands go back to helping the man beneath you. Maya comes rushing to your side and you motion for her to finish helping him now that you've stopped his bleeding. You look back up at your rescuer, "Do you think you could keep helping? I want to see if we can get people out of the rubble. I can heal them." You're unsure if he helped you because he knows who you are or because he's out here to help protect the city.

"As My Lady wishes." He winks at you, turns, and whistles to some armored people wearing the coat of arms of the patriar house Eltan. They, along with this brash young man, ready themselves to fight anything that comes your way.

They escort you back to your home where you organize your household to help you with the rescue effort. Assigning some to make the ballroom into a makeshift hospital, gathering anything clean that will serve as bandages and the rest are the strongest of them, able bodied enough to help dig out and carry the injured back here. As you return to the broken streets you see more armed people; chivalric scions of the highborn and household guards starting to come out and fight. You start to gather the injured, only checking for internal damage, head injuries or heavy bleeding. Those you heal to point they can then be moved to your little field hospital. You're unsure how long you will need to use your magic, so you try to keep your healing to only those on death's door. The rest of the injured are carried away by your servants to be assessed by Maya, she can handle basic wound dressings.

As the mind flayers fall, you're left with more and more people to help search the surrounding buildings, mostly the servants of your neighbors. You stick close to the front line of fighters; they too require healing from time to time so they can keep fighting and the newest casualties can be brought to you quickly, ensuring a higher survival rate. Almost everyone you get to you are able to heal, only a few being brought to you too late.

Time seems to drag on into eternity and pass by in a flash. Every face blurring together as you work. Another sudden pain shoots through your head, just as intense as last time. Your hands fly up to your head when it's suddenly… it's gone… When the pain subsides you know what it means; he's done it. Your eyes shoot up to the sky to the see the giant brain falling from it. You point and shout, jubilant at what's happening. Everyone around you, everyone filling the streets cheers. Renewed by the assured victory everyone dives back into the rescue efforts. Maya comes rushing to you, begging you to stop, to rest, but now you feel reinvigorated. You keep going until you're interrupted…

"Would My Lady be able to patch up one more?" The oaf hovers over you as you finish up with an old woman.

"Let me take a look," You stand and turn to him, your eyes quickly scanning for some evidence of injury, only you see nothing, "You look to be just fine."

"You wound me further, My Lady. Am I not worthy of your healing touch?" He clutches dramatically at his armored chest, stepping closer.

You furrow your brow at him as you think; gods, is he trying to proposition you in the middle of all of this?

"I see no wounds at all." You take a step back from him.

"Come now, I rescued you. I helped you when you asked me for it. The least you could do is show me a little gratitude." He leers at you, his eyes roaming down the front of your body, making you painfully aware of just how very little you're wearing.

"Then I thank you for your timely intervention earlier." You bow your head slightly, wondering; if you were to clutch your gown closed, would he stop you?

His hand reaches out towards your face, but Maya steps between the two of you before he can touch you,

"Sir will not take such liberties with my mistress. The Master is not one to be trifled with." Though her voice quavers she stands tall and defiant in the face of this lordling. You're surprised by her boldness, and the oaf seems just as taken aback.

He glares down at her, a menacing downturn to his lips, a hand curling into a fist before he then looks over her to you, his body language shifting to something more cordial, but no less threatening,

"Another time, then. My Lady," He bows and stalks off.

There's an audible sigh of relief from Maya before she speaks,

"Are you unharmed Mistress?" She's shaking as she looks you over, the poor brave thing.

"I am. Thank you, for that just now." You smile at her with genuine gratitude. You don't know how you're supposed to deal with that sort of thing now that you're no longer a Paramour.

You decide to walk back to the palace with her, maybe you do need a rest. The other survivors can be dealt with by other clerics and healers now that the fighting is over. You send Maya head to prepare a goblet for you. Your pace slows, your hands rubbing the back of your neck and shoulders as you look up at the changing sky. There are only dragons now, no more of those monstrous ships, and even the winged beasts start to disappear through portals scattered around the pink sky. You reach the gate, your raven perched atop, her wings open, fluttering slightly.

"Why are you only willful when I'm trying to keep you safe?" He sounds tired but not angry. You turn to see him standing just behind you.

"Astarion!" You jump into his open arms, "My love!" You kiss him, "You did it!" Another kiss, "You came back!" You kiss him thrice, but this time he holds you there, taking your breath away.

"I made you a promise, did I not?" His words are smiled against your lips before he kisses you again.

"You did… Oh! Does this mean? Are we free of the parasites?" You lean back in his arms, excitedly looking up into his eyes.

"Indeed, it does. No more do we need to fear turning into one of those disgusting creatures. We are now well and truly free. Free to pursue my great ambitions for us, my love."

"Hehe, anything you want, you know I will follow you."

"I do… and I see you've already gotten a head start on my glorious rise. I believe these patriars, whose lives you've saved, will be most generous in their thanks to us. You their healer and rescuer. Me, the greatest of the heroes that felled the great brain that threatened all. How do you manage to make all your disobediences into victories, my love?"

"I don't know what you're talking about," You give him an innocent smile, wrapping your arms up over his shoulders, so you stand on tiptoe, hoping for another kiss, "I always listen to yo- Oh!" Your skin starts to tingle, sting… burn…

"Talia?!"

"What's happening to me?" You look at your arms and hands and see they're smoldering… turning to ash…

"NO!" Astarion commands but to no avail, the sun is killing you.

Chapter 24: Epilogue

Chapter Text

1.

Astarion scoops you up into his arms and runs impossibly fast into your palace, down the stairs and into your windowless room. It's just in time. Your whole body is covered in tiny fissures branching out from every part of you that had been directly exposed to the sun, deepening and spreading should you move over much. You hold your body as still as you can as he sets you down, holding your arms in his hands. Frantically he looks you over, incredulous that he couldn't stop you from burning.

"Astarion, my love, I'm OK." You try and fail to calm him. You want to heal yourself, to prove to him that you really are fine, but you can't muster your magic. Perhaps you had already used the last of it on instinct to save yourself from the sun.

"No. No this cannot be happening. I am the Vampire Ascendant! If I want to extend my protection to you, then so it should be. I will not tolerate being denied!" Indignantly he growls to no one.

"You're not being denied. Please, my love," You reach out to caress his cheek, but he recoils from your ruined hand, "Sorry…" You bring your hand back, clutching at the open front of your dressing gown, covering yourself, trying to hide your charred body within it.

"This has to be some kind of mistake," He mutters under his breath, turning away from you to pace in front of the fireplace, "How is this beyond me? Vampires can pass on their gifts, so why can't I?"

"Maybe…" He stops, your soft voice pulling him out of his thoughts, his eyes slide over to yours, "Maybe it's like calling the wolf and my raven… Maybe it will just take some time?"

He sighs heavily, striding over to you,

"Perhaps you are right, pet." His hand comes to your cheek, caressing your face, seemingly no longer disturbed by your burned flesh, "Perhaps, all I need is time. We will wait for me to further come into my powers and try again."

You watch your skin slowly start to heal itself. The fissures sealing, the rough dry skin smoothing out once more as you wait for a bath to be filled. It's not just that ruined moment in the sun, but everything else has left you covered in filth and gore; you want nothing more than to scrub all of it away.

The water slowly grows cold as you continue to soak in it. Astarion went upstairs to speak with the survivors that are still being treated in your ballroom, he said to join him once you were presentable again. Maya comes to your side with a sheet to dry off with, her quiet voice assuring you the sun has set and all the curtains have been drawn to protect you. You slip your arm out of the sheet, examining it. There's no trace of your burns and you can even feel some of your magic returning, you could even continue to treat those Astarion wants favors from.

You sit at the vanity so Maya may brush out your long hair and dress you. She has brought a simple and elegant gown, one of the ones you decided was not to your liking, but it will have to do for now. She dresses it up with a velvet sash tied tight around your waist and a few pieces of delicate jewelry, making you almost appear like one of them. You thank her, preparing your performer's smile to face these nobles still in your home.

The palace is less full now that some of them have returned to their palaces. The ballroom is quieter than you would have thought as you enter. You look around briefly and find Astarion happily speaking with an older man. You recognize this man, he was at Gortash's inauguration. Astarion sees as you and holds his hand out to you, waiting to introduce you,

"My love, this is Duke Eltan." You lightly hold his hand as you curtsy deeply to the duke, "This is the lady of my palace, Talia." You rise and smile demurely.

"What a lovely creature she is," He looks from your to Astarion smiling. Then, turning to you, he holds out his hand so he may take yours and place a chaste kiss on the back of it, "Lady Talia, I cannot thank you enough for your help in this tragedy," He continues to hold your hand, patting the back of it, accentuating his sentiments, "Our glorious city reduced nearly to rubble by these monsters. It is unthinkable that it should happen here. Such wanton destruction. Such a waste of life. Regrettable, truly… But I digress. My Lady, you were a beacon of light in the midst of it all. An angel sent to us. I do not know how many you saved, but thanks to you, this city will have many of its ruling class here to bring it back to its original, glorious, illustrious state again."

"I only wished to protect my home and those that make it such a joy to live in." You smile sweetly and dip your head to his rambling praise, "Did you require further healing, my Lord? I am able to fully restore you now that I have had a little rest." You place your other hand over his, giving it a tender squeeze, as Astarion nods approvingly.

"I am quite well now, thank you. Though there are some here that could use more of your gentle touch, my dear. Many were grievously injured, and though I know you did what you could to keep them alive, not all would be able to return home in their present condition. Please, if you would, see to them." He pats your hand before holding it out to the others around the ballroom, releasing you to help his fellow patriars.

"It would be my pleasure," You curtsy slightly before walking away from them to help the others.

The duke had exaggerated a bit, there's not that many injured grievously, you know you saw to that during the battle. But on you go, deciding to simply fully heal them all. You go to each makeshift bed, padded chair, chaise and sofa, speaking to each great lord and lady as your magic flows into them. Every one of them thanks you profusely; some inviting you and Astarion to their homes to enjoy their hospitality as a more appropriate show of gratitude. You thank them, assuring them that you will be happy to avail yourselves of their good company.

Once again, your magic drains away to nothing, leaving you feeling fatigued, but all of the people in your home have been cured and have gone on to their homes or that of family and friends if theirs lie in ruin now. How thankful you are that your home remains undamaged after this harrowing ordeal.

You drift over to one of the curtained windows, quietly musing to yourself. It's funny to think you had had all these names memorized once; patriars, noble houses, merchant lords and other such people. Now you have faces to go along with almost all of them. You wonder which ones indulged in the masques. How many have had you? How many recognize you, or even Astarion? Do they all know they owe their lives to people they saw only as pleasurable playthings?

"So… you're on the arm of a new lordling?" His deep voice rumbles near your ear. It's him, the oaf, the one who does know who you truly are. The one you are now fearful is an Eltan; a powerful patriar family, their patriarch on the council that rules the city. He leans down to whisper in your ear, "Are you what happened to Gortash, I wonder?" His breath stirs the hair at the side of your face, his closeness denoting his desire.

Is that what the rumor is? That Gortash's consort, the mystery woman, killed him? None besides this oaf know who she was, who you are in that regard. Not so long as he keeps his mouth shut.

"I don't know what you could possibly mean by that." You hold very still, staring straight ahead at the curtained window; you're sure he would grab hold of you if you tried to walk away.

"I was no friend to Gortash, I don't care what became of him. If you were his demise or not. What I don't like is you pretending like I don't know exactly who and what you are, my little kitty," He drapes his arm over your shoulders, bringing you closer to him, breathing in the scent of your hair as you remain motionless, "Why not leave this new one and come to me instead? I would have gladly taken you after Gortash, if you had let me."

"I did not wish to be there withhim.I do not wish to beanywhereother than here. This is my home, where I belong." You finally turn to look him in the eyes, to let him see you're not as you were when you were held at the fortress, "Please, remove your arm."

But he doesn't notice the difference in you. He only sees what he wants to see, the Paramour he enjoyed and now a personal toy to take home. You can't lash out at this man, but neither can you let him entertain the idea that you can be taken. You try to think of how to get away from him without drawing attention, or worse, hurting his noble pride. You attempt to turn away, but his grip tightens. You look around slightly frantically and see Astarion coming to you with Duke Eltan.

"Do you know the Lady, Darius? I did not know you had met her before." He looks at Darius' closeness to you, his arm around you, narrowing his gaze on his errant son.

"No, of course not father," His hand slowly slips away from your shoulder, "I was simply expressing my gratitude for her help in all of this. She has been most gracious." He walks to his father's side and looks at you intently.

"It pleases me that 'My' Lady was of such great service to you on this dark day," Astarion glares at Darius, his arm wrapping around you, pulling you into him, his hand possessively gripping your hip, "Do you require anything else of us?" He looks as though he'd like to rip Darius' throat out.

"We shall be bidding you good evening. Thank you again for your exceptional hospitality. Your heroism is sure to be celebrated in the coming weeks. I shall summon you when the council meets again. We must begin work on the city's reconstruction, with your generous offer of aid, of course. Good evening, Lord Ancunin, Lady Ancunin." The elder Eltan turns waiting for his son.

"Good evening to you both. I look forward to our next meeting." Darius bows slightly, holding Astarion's stare without so much as flinching.

You feel Astarion bristling as they walk away,

"The gall! The utter audacity of that whelp to lay hands on you. Were he not an Eltan, I'd have killed him on the spot." He holds your chin so you look up into his eyes, seeing the barely contained rage in them. You'd have liked to see that. You can't stand the way that boy thinks himself entitled to you.

"I know, my love."

2.

After enjoying a rather late dinner with Astarion, he decides to simply relax in bed. You lean back against his chest, nestled between his legs, his arms around you, as he begins to tell you of his designs to rule Baldur's Gate,

"I shall make this city mine. Ours. Of course, we will need to do it quietly. Charming these fools into handing over the reins of power to me. I am starting with donating to the reconstruction efforts, Duke Eltan is already most grateful. His approval will aid in gaining the trust of the rest of the council. And you, my love, have been unexpectedly marvelous thus far. Your rescue efforts, healing all that were brought to you, your support of those fighting and then how well you handled them here, in our palace. I had not realized you were so well trained at conducting yourself in high society- outside of masquerades. I am quite impressed."

"I was expected to be able to entertain in more ways than one, you know." You smile coyly.

"Were you now?" He gives your ear a nibble, making you shiver, "I quite enjoy your other talents. Though I suppose no one else will get to experience them, now that I have you."

"What? You don't wish to share me?" You tease, enjoying the thrill of riling him up, how it makes him more vicious with you.

"I do not like other people touching my things," It's a growl in your ear and a fearsome grip on your body. You lean back into him further, relishing his possessiveness, "You're mine. And we will be together forever. You shall be by my side as I take this city. And then the world."

"And after that?" You close your eyes, your hands gripping his legs as he leans down.

"We shall dominate it until the sun itself melts. And then, we will give ourselves to the night." He bites down on your shoulder, eliciting a cry from your lips. The suddenness of it making the pain all the more delicious, "We have a glorious future ahead of us, my love."

He bites again, your body tensing at the fierceness. His hands slide down your arms, gripping your wrists, bringing them up over your head to hold tightly in one hand. He twists you over one leg, pinning your wrists to the bed, leaving his free hand to come down hard on your exposed rear. The loud slap of his hand striking your body is excruciating, it makes you bite down on your lip. You know he's smiling, enjoying your moans of pleasure.

His warm hand caresses you, soothing the sting, then rises and strikes again. You cry out this time, torn between wanting him to keep going and wanting him to fuck you. You wiggle your hips ever so slightly, silently begging for more of whatever he wants of you.

One more strike and caress before he releases your wrists. They're bruised, beautiful shades of purple blooming under the skin. You stay exactly as he left you, awaiting his next desire. He strokes your hair, sliding his hand up along your scalp to grasp a handful, pulling you, bending you back sharply. He puppets you, bringing you up to his face, kissing your lips as you strain blissfully in this position. His free hand caresses your neck, dragging his fingers down to a nipple to pinch, twist and pull, down again past your navel until he reaches his destination. His fingers sliding between the wet lips between your legs, circling your clit before slipping into you easily. You moan into his kiss as his fingers move in and out of you, swirling, teasing you. Panting, you breathe into his mouth, squirming at his ministrations. You're so close. You need more and yet...

His fingers leave you as he pulls back away from you, denying you what you crave. He smiles wickedly, moving you to push you face down into the bed. His hand releases its grasp on your hair to glide down your spine where both his hands take hold of your ass, pushing to angle you up, arching your back sharply. You can feel him pressing against your pussy, anticipating the pleasure he will give you, but he holds off, waiting for you to try pushing back on him. He wants to make you beg. He wants you to beg him to give you deliverance from this mounting pressure. You whimper his name as he teasingly slides between your squeezed thighs, along your dripping folds, tormenting you.

The wait is excruciating, but you can't move, he won't let you. You begin to cry from the tension, ever rising but finding no absolution. And just as you cry out for him, he relents, and you feel him penetrating you. Sweet release is instant. You can't help the immediacy of your climax; he made you wait an eternity. And now he continues on through the pulsing waves of your body until they subside. Never relenting in his thrusts, your body shivering all the while, readying for you to cum again. The continuous onslaught of him pumping into you is a divine affliction. You grip the sheets, biting them to stifle your screams of unsurpassed pleasure as you both succumb to a little death.

His grip on you lessens as he pulls away from your shaking body. You lay still a moment, your mind almost blank except for Her divine presence, enjoying the pain he brings you, an offering She gladly welcomes from her immortal Chosen.

3.

Astarion holds you close as he waits for breakfast to be brought in and the fire stoked to light the room. His hands play with your hair and trace little circles on your skin, you delight in how he enjoys touching you. Maya comes in with the tray and a gown for you to wear. She looks at you apologetically, word was sent from Facemaker's; it will be a few more days for your order to be delivered, extenuating circumstances and all. You will make do with what is already here. She then turns to Astarion, eyes cast down as she assures her master that the house is ready for you to walk in and not be at risk. He scowls at the need to block out the sun for your sake. You try to gentle his gloomy mood,

"We can attempt today, to experiment with what it will take for me to join you in the sun again, my love. My magic is fully restored, I'd be able to heal immediately. There's no risk." You caress his face, a hopeful smile playing on your lips.

"That would be an acceptable morning activity," He smiles down at you, nuzzling into your hand, "Though I am waiting on a summons, I do not know how long that will take. I also have some private matters to attend to, so I cannot spend too much time with you this morning, pet."

"I understand."

"Although, one of the matters I must attend to is apparently the hiring of builders for our palace? Something about a doorway needing to be put into my study. You wouldn't happen to know anything about this?" He raises an eyebrow as you flush, a little embarrassed at being found out before you could have the final plans drawn up and presented to him for approval.

"I had meant to talk to you about it once I had everything ready, my love…" You're unsure if you can flush in your vampiric state, but if you can you are now.

"You were trying to surprise me? Haha, that's cute." It's a sweetly indulgent chuckle, "I would like to hear this idea of yours."

"That room, next to your study, well… it seemed like the perfect place to have our bedchamber moved to…" He waits for you to continue, "I know you love how the sun shines into your study, I've seen you just standing in it, smiling and I thought… Maybe you'd like to wake in bed with the sun shining in on you as well…" You fidget a bit, waiting for him to respond.

"You are the sweetest thing," He nibbles on a wrist, teeth barely breaking skin for a little taste, "I shall see to it that you are provided with everything you will need to make us a grand bedchamber, one best suited to our… proclivities." He bites down harder now drinking you in and you squirm, wondering if he's going to indulge further or if he's just teasing you.

He's teasing you. He releases you and goes to the table to eat while you pout at him. He laughs, telling you to join him, you do as he says, sitting at the table and drinking slowly while finishes up. Once done he rises to get dressed and Maya dresses you. As she fusses at the gown another servant comes in, there's been latter from Ana delivered. They bow and hand it over before going to Astarion to whisper.

Excitedly you break the seal and begin to read, sitting back down at the table. Ana lets you know everyone at the temple is safe, though there were a few who transformed into hideous tentacle monsters. Davora was able to kill them. Ana had no idea she was a formidable fighter, neither did you, for that matter. There's been some damage to The Chateau, but not enough to prevent normal services being rendered, just now there's fewer rooms available and appointments must be made, no wandering in for boredom's sake. You giggle and wonder how many will be turned away now that it must be prearranged. It is good to hear Ana and everyone else is safe. You ask Maya to bring you pen and paper so you can write Ana back with your own updates.

"Do not reveal too much, my love. I do not expect our letters to be intercepted, but you never know who's reading them. We must be especially careful now that I am to be playing the Grand Game."

"Of course not. I shall use the utmost discretion in my correspondences. It'll only be when she's here that we will talk freely." You give him a wink and continue your writing.

You may not have been a devotee to the goddess of secrecy, but that was still a large part of your former life. The rich and the powerful decidedly loath being embroiled in scandal and yet ironically crave hearing of their peers' misfortunes. You finish and follow Astarion up to his study to try again bathing in sunlight.

You sit next to a window, Astarion holds one of your hands while beginning to move a curtain to one side, his face creased with concentration. You feel the warmth of the sun on your skin, and for a brief moment it seems to be working, but then you feel the sting that comes before the burn, and he quickly closes the curtain as you begin to heal yourself.

He curses, muttering under his breath and paces, puzzling out what just happened; what he was just attempting and what he can adjust to make it work. He looks to you to let him know you're ready to try again. You hold out your hand, ready to go. Again, he places your hand in the sun and concentrates. This time lasts longer, but still you burn. He glares at the offending window as he releases your hand to be healed again.

"I have some research to do. There are books and scrolls in the chapel below us, hidden knowledge of his that I will need to consult further. I have already begun to read them, and they have taught me much about true vampirism. But I do not yet know all of it nor how much of it will be applicable to me, now that I am so much more," He smiles down at you and plants a small kiss on your forehead, "But now, I must get to work. You may return to your little project in the room next to me. Your garden will have to wait."

"As you wish, my love. I hope you do find something of use." You rise and walk briskly to the door, closing it behind.

The moment the door latches you see sunlight pouring out from beneath it, and you swallow your disappointment. You will be with him in the sun again soon. You hate the way he looks so distraught, not being able to do something he knows he has the power to do. Not having full control yet is irritating him to no end. Your eyes rise from the light on the floor, looking to the door leading to your soon to be bedchamber. Maya comes down the hall with all your notes; it's time to continue your work.

4.

Several weeks have passed, the cleanup and reconstruction of the city is well underway. Of course, the first buildings to be rebuilt are those of the upper city. Meanwhile a parade is being planned to celebrate the heroes that still remain in the city; those only being Astarion, Shadowheart, Gale, Halsin and Jaheira, all the rest are gone. They have all been busy helping in the reconstruction efforts in the lower parts of the city.

You've reached out to Halsin about helping with food for the people. You may be long out of practice, but you still know druidic magic used in the cultivating of plants, you could assist him in growing fruiting trees and vegetables in the city's parks. He has happily accepted your offer. As much as Astarion is concerned with keeping the upper city residents happy you know that the denizens of the lower city should be kept happy as well. If for no other reason than unfed populations tend to riot and attempt revolutions. Such things would hinder Astarion's grand plans. You both must be seen as a hero to the people as well as a friend to the elite.

Once again you can go into the sun, but only is Astarion is with you. He is yet to master the ability to protect you, he must be able to see you for it to work for now. It has been a marked improvement. You can now enjoy your garden while he is in his study; he has a perfect view of you as you work to make it bloom again.

The bedchamber is complete, all your needs and wants met within its four walls. The large windows are hung with heavy drapes, the grand fourposter bed is canopied with thick curtains on all sides so you can be protected even if Astarion is away. Other, more fun, embellishments have also been included; both of you enjoying their inclusion.

Some of your new neighbors, that you had rescued during the battle, have paid you visits. All of them enjoying your hospitality and beginning to plan parties, balls, bacchanals, some even being so bold as to mention masquerades again. You smile innocently as Astarion welcomes the chance to host all of these soirees in the coming months.

The Chateau remains as indomitable as its Truescar, all members doing well in the wake of everything. It pained you to see the beautiful building damaged, but now Davora plans to expand the building, adding many more improvements, so excited by the very prospect of it all. You promise to help with the gardens once she's finished the construction.

Ana has been visiting you more often since The Chateau is limiting its business. So, she watches you putter about in your garden as she sits on the bench, drinking and gossiping. She joins you on shopping trips and sometimes even sings for you and Astarion. He is adamant she be among the entertainment of his first masquerade. You think it's because he wants a chance to show all of them who the two of you are… were. But he needs to be discreet, investigating who the members of the great houses that attended.

The parade is set for the next ten-day. It will start at the Wavemother's Temple at the harbor and work its way up to the upper city, ending at the construction site of the new Ducal Palace. You will wear your lycoris gown while Astarion has had new garments of his own ordered from Facemaker. His parade coat will match your gown in color and have a pair of embroidered spider lilies over the front. He plans to give a grand speech at the very end, something to inspire the people to think him genuine in his efforts to bring prosperity in the face of adversity. He tells you next to nothing about how he will accomplish these things, but you don't need to concern yourself with the minutia of it all. You smile hungrily at all of his ambitions. You know your influence, your very presence, as the Chosen of Loviatar will only ever drive him to further seek power, more and more of it. His appetite for it all, as the Chosen of Bane, will only ever grow stronger. And you can't wait to live that life. A life of unprecedented wealth, luxury, pleasure and pain with him. Forever. Until the world falls down.

The End.

Chapter 25: Bonus Content

Chapter Text

Date of posting: 3/30/2024

This bonus chapter will contain:

1. Some off page character interactions with my thought process for them and how they influenced how the story unfolded. I was trying to not just have things happen for no reason. I wrote several chapters I had to scrap because people weren’t making sense. I will probably add to this section as I unearth more of my handwritten notes. They exist somewhere in the disaster that is my house.
2. My Astarion playlist. I’m sorry it's not a Spotify thing that can be clicked on. I am old fashioned, and I get all my music on iTunes and make my playlists that way. We go on a lot of road trips and the internet does not always exist where we drive to. So, it will be a list in alphabetical order by artist. The list is added to fairly regularly, so I'll try to keep it updated here. Most of these songs were inspiring for this story, some are just Astarion-esque, and some have made my brain think of a sequel and other story ideas that I will hopefully write one day…
3. A preview of the first chapter of the sequel I convinced myself to write for this story. I am a glutton for creative punishment apparently. I’ll start posting what I have hopefully soon. I want to flesh out more of it before I commit to posting it. I’m having a harder time with it since it is entirely post-game, so I have to make up just about everything and I have never done that before.
4. If I can ever figure out how to get my doodles onto this, I will put them in a fourth section. I am painfully computer illiterate these days, I have become my mother… But until then, they’re just on my DeviantArt listed in the summary.

Why Delphinium and Lycoris for their Paramour names:

I really just liked the way Delphinium sounded and that it shortened so nicely to Delphi. And the more I thought about it the more appropriate it became because of the Oracle of Delphi. Ana will one day know her best friend’s fate, but will she tell her?

At first I was going to use Lilium for Talia, because I love lilies, especially stargazers. But as I was putzing about looking up the meanings of different lilies I came across a Japanese folklore story about Red Spider Lilies (Lycoris Radiata). So not only are they associated with death, or parting from someone permanently there’s also a story about why their leaves and flowers don’t appear at the same time. The tragic love story of two fairies that go against the sun goddess’ rules and fall in love. She punishes them by separating them forever. (Peri Manju and Peri Saka) so it felt like it fit the story thematically.

Talia is a naive silly girl (Whatever the age equivalent in Elf to a 19-20 year old human). She’s not an idiot but she doesn’t have the experience or maturity to be suspicious of other people’s motivations when they tell her things. She’s fairly likely to take people at their word if they are people she knows and trusts; ie: Davora, Loviatar and Astarion. She wouldn’t suspect any of them of trying to manipulate her. But they are all lying liars who lie to her. She’s only ever suspicious of people/ things she doesn’t know, ie: the Emperor.

Astarion’s dilemma after their fight at Moonrise Towers

Everything is left to chance, seeing if Talia or he would apologize first and whoever did would dictate who’s advice he would follow, Lae’zel’s or Shadowheart’s.

Lae’zel’s advice: Why deny yourselves if you’re both attracted to each other and both enjoy what you are doing? She wasn’t trying to say to surrender to the darkness that’s inside both of them, she didn’t know anything about either of them or their past and current situations. Her advice inadvertently pushes him to give in to his darkest desires regarding Talia, even before his Ascension. And it’s because I think those things were always inside of him, he just kept them mildly in check. But her advice makes him feel like he can, and should fully dive into it, embrace it, damn the consequences and what anyone else thinks.

Shadowheart’s advice: Would have been more along the lines of maybe slowing down, there’s a lot going on not just with the whole parasite thing but between the two of them. She’s not saying to stay away from each other but just to maybe take a step back. And if Astarion had been the one to apologize first he would have heeded Shadowheart’s advice. I wrote an entire chapter trying to work in Astarion’s revelation about not wanting to be seen as a sexual thing but I couldn’t make it work with the direction I was taking my story. So Talia apologizes first, sealing both of their fates.

Sometimes I play with the idea of having a diverging story where I do go down that road, but it takes too much brain power for me since I personally prefer Ascended Astarion in game. I love me a bad boy vampire a la Anne Rice’s Lestat… Hell, even Spike from Buffy was my preference over Angel.

Shadowheart really does want to get Talia away from Astarion after his change at Moonrise, but she doesn’t know how. She sees the difference in Talia and worries for her, but doesn’t know how to broach the subject or even how to get Talia alone now. Astarion won’t let Shadowheart separate them, he’s hell bent on keeping her by his side. Neither Astarion or Talia know at that point why the attraction is so strong between them, but now neither really cares about the why, they just give in to how good it feels to be together.

Alexander Jean:

"So Bad", "Thief"

Ari Abdul:

"Bite Marks", "Stay"

Bad Omens:

"THE DEATH OF PEACE OF MIND", "Just Pretend"

Boris Slavlov:

"I Want to Live" both instrumental and vocal versions.

The Cardigans:

"Lovefool", "Erase/Rewind", "My Favorite Game"

Chase Holfelder:

"Animal" cover of song by The Neon Trees

Cloudy June:

"FU In My Head"

The Darkness:

"I Believe in a Thing Called Love"

David Bowie Labyrinth soundtrack:

"As the World Falls Down", "Within You"

Derivakat:

"Pomegranate Lips", "Bite"

Dove Cameron:

"Use Me (Brutal Hearts)", "Still", "Sand", "Bad Idea", "We Go Down Together"

Garbage:

"Only Happy When It Rains", "Vow", "My Lover's Box", "#1 Crush"

Ghost:

"Life Eternal"

Hey Violet:

"Unholy", "Like Lovers Do"

Hozier:

"Eat Your Young", "Take Me to Church"

Jonas Brothers:

"Sucker"

Kanon X Kanon:

"Calendula Requiem" from a fantastic anime called Shiki, watch it!

Kiss:

"I Was Made for Lovin' You"

Hamilton musical:

"Burn" sung by Phillipa Soo. There’s an absolutely amazing animatic on YouTube. It’s why I put this song on my playlist. The video is called “Burn (Ascended Astarion animatic)” by Vesper

Madonna:

"Like a Prayer"

Maneskin:

"I WANNA BE YOUR SLAVE"

Marlyn Manson:

"Slutgarden"

Muse:

"Undisclosed Desires", "Starlight", "Super MAssive Black Hole", "Crying Shame", "Time Is Runing Out"

Nine Inch Nails:

"Closer"

Panic! At the Disco:

"Death of a Bachelor", "This is Gospel", "Nicotine", "Far Too Young to Die", "Collar Full"

Paris Paloma:

"the fruits", "My Mind (Now)"

polnalyubvi:

"CnpeHa" I don't know how to make Cyrillic letters on here, but it translates to Siren it's beautiful.

Post Malone:

"Circles", "Sunflower"

Rihanna:

“Diamonds”, "S&M", "S&M (remix featuring Britney Spears)", "Stay (Featuring Mikky Ekko)"

Scott Bradlee's Postmodern Jukebox:

"I Was Made for Lovin' You" cover of Kiss song

She Wants Revenge:

"Tear You Apart"

Simon Curtis:

"Flesh"

Skylar Grey:

"Stand By Me" cover of Ben E. King song

Sofia Karlberg:

"Viva La Vida (Acoustic Version)" cover of Coldplay song, "Crazy in Love" cover of Beyonce song, "Toxic" cover of Britney Spears song

Stone Sour:

"Song #3"

Timeflies:

"Insomniac"

Tommee Profitt:

"Can't Help Falling In Love" both light and dark versions, cover of Elvis song

Tove Lo:

"Borderline"

Shannon & Keast:

"Bad Romance" cover of Lady Gaga song

Kina Grannis:

"Can't Help Falling in Love" cover of Elvis song

ZAYN & Taylor Swift:

"I Don't Wanna Live Forever" hate 50 Shades, but those movies had some good songs on the soundtracks.

Moulin Rouge movie soundtrack:

"Come What May", "El Tango de Roxanne", "Hindi Sad Diamonds"

Deftones:

"Chang (In the House of Flies)" or the whole soundtrack of Queen of the Damned

Romeo + Juliet movie soundtrack:

"When Doves Cry" sung by Quindon Tarver

Bishop Briggs:

"Never Tear Us Apart"

The Veronicas:

"Untouched"

Violet Orlandi:

"Like a Stone" cover of Audioslave song, "Wicked Game" cover of Chris Isaak song

The Weekend:

"Save Your Tears"

YOHIO:

"My Nocturnal Serenade" for the pure camp that is this song and video reminding me of early 2000's J-Pop, specifically Gakt, if anyone else knows that reference.

5 Seconds of Summer:

"Teeth"

New Songs 5/24/24: (I’m working on a new playlist for the next story, these are there but they also felt appropriate here don’t know if this one will be updated past this point since I now need to get into a new headspace. The new one is mostly metal.)

”Hurt”, “The Hand That Feeds”

Nine Inch Nails

New songs 5/7/24:

"Obsesses"

Sophie Powers & Ashley Sienna

"Love on the Brain"

Rihanna

"Scorpio", "The Flood", "Comfort", "Unicorn"

Pour Vous

"River"

Bishop Briggs

New songs 4/21/24:

Artemas

"i like the way you kiss me (burnt)" from the remix ep, and a very nice YouTube Astarion video by Arwenlmladris

Hidden Citizens

"Paint it Black" cover of a Rolling Stones song.

Marylin Manson

"If I Was Your Vampire" another good YouTube video by my_angedonia

Arlaner

"I Miss You"

Erutan

"The Willow Maid" it's not actually on my playlist but I've been listening to it on non-stop repeat while editing. It's hauntingly beautiful.

New songs 4/9/24:

Violet Orlandi

"In the Air Tonight" cover of Phil Collins

Fleetwood Mac

"Rhiannon", "Gypsy", "Dreams"

Really want to find good covers of: Bonnie Tyler's "Total Eclipse of the Heart" and Animotion's "Obsession" that would fit the whole vibe/sound thing I have going on on this playlist, but alas I have yet to find suitable ones...

New songs 4/5/24:

Birdy

"I Only Wanna Be With You" cover of Dusty Springfield song

Dusty Springfield

"I Only Wanna Be With You"

Hidden Citizens

"I Think We're Alone Now" cover of Tommy James and the Shondells song (probably more famously covered by Tiffany in the 80's), "(I Just) Died In Your Arms" cover of Cutting Crew song, "I Ran" cover of A Flock of Seagulls song, "It's A Sin" cover of Pet Shop Boys song

Can anyone tell I am a child of the 90's? Also, I have a thing for Baz Lurhmann's tragic romance musical soundtracks...

3. This sneak peek is a thank you to the two people who decided they liked my one unfinished story enough to subscribe to me as a writer on here. So… Thank You!

And I’m getting more of Persephone vibes from how this story is turning out so far. I blame the song “Pomegranate Lips” by Derivikat. The song haunts my every waking moment in the best of ways. Even my daughter is obsessed, and we play it every time we get in the car together and sing like obnoxious banshees. So, without further ado:

For two centuries the Vampire Ascendant came to her. Every ten years he’d make the long journey to the Forest of Amtar, to the temple half buried within it. There he’d find her, unchanged in all the centuries she’s laid there; the same beautiful gown gracing her perfect body, crimson hair like a pool of blood beneath her, her face the picture of lovely sorrow, tears ever flowing, softly lit by the glow of her prison. And just outside that glow he’d sit, unmoving, for a tenday, unable to reach her, unable to touch her. Always with the intention of freeing her but never knowing how.

On this visit She comes to him: Loviatar. Her cold presence filling the room as She smiles at him from the other side of his lover’s prison, Her eyes sparkling as She speaks,

“How long before you give up, little tyrant?” He doesn’t answer Her, just meets Her icy gaze with his own fiery one. She comes to him, stepping over Her prisoner’s body to caress his face, whispering in his ear, “How about we play a little game? I will free her from this cage, but there will be… conditions.”

His body tenses, his eyes locking onto her, his longing and regret threatening to break his imposing countenance, his voice thick with held in emotion,

“Anything. Just give her back.”

Loviatar sweeps behind him, wrapping Her long arms around his neck, nuzzling into him before pressing Her cheek to his, joining him in looking down at Her Chosen,

“She will wake, but… she will have no memory of these past 1000 years. She will wake believing it’s the day she was abducted from Baldur’s Gate. She won’t know you, the life you lived, of the love she bears you, none of it. She won’t even know what she is.” His eyes flinch, his love will wake a stranger in her own body, “You will have to earn her love all over again. I will give you one year. And in that time she must learn the truth of what you did to her; how she spent 300 years in blissful happiness with you only to spend 700 years in torment here, and she must choose to stay with you despite it all. If not… I will take her back, restore her memory and leave her in a hell of her own making. And you, Astarion… You will spend the rest of eternity knowing that she would rather torture herself forever with memories of a life she once shared with you than forgive you and start life anew with you.”

“You would truly do this? You would set her free?” His heart races at the thought of holding her in his arms again, refusing to hear the warning of their shared fates.

“She has been an unending font of pleasure for me. A veritable feast. I do so hate to give it up, but… You are quite delicious too, my little vampire lord. I wish to continue savoring you as well. I quite enjoy playing with my food… And, with that in mind, should you manage to make her love you, despite being the monster that you are, I shall let her go. A thousand years of having my perfect Chosen is far more than any of the other gods have ever had. Oh, save for my Lord Bane, of course.” Her eyes gleam, drinking in his distaste at the mention of his god, the architect of his misery, “Oh! And one more thing, she can’t know of our little game. You can tell no one. Understood?”

“Yes.” Whatever the conditions, he doesn’t care, he’d agree to anything She asks to get her back.

Loviatar’s mouth stretches into an unnatural grin, all viciousness and cruelty, vanishing as the glow beneath Talia fades away…

And that’s it for the preview. I’m going to try writing in third person this time to give myself more freedom with events happening that Talia would have no way of knowing about and to get more insight into Astarion’s mind. Totally understand if this won’t be your cup of tea. You can just read the first story and leave it as a tragedy, it is meant to be a complete story with no need for more. My brain just wouldn’t hush. I blame The Cardigans. I was listening to “Erase/Rewind” and it sparked my imagination. What if we gave these two idiots another chance at happily ever after?

Final random nonsense. A note to my future self really so I can remember where this madness sprang from:

It started with the idea for a one-shot while I was having a particularly emotional period in November 2023 (hadn’t had one that bad in years) and all I wanted to do was curl into a ball and cry. I fed the sad monster by downloading “I want to live” vocal and instrumental and listened to them on nonstop repeat for 3 days. So, I wrote my original one-shot and posted it. It then continued to haunt my dreams and every waking moment. How did they get to that point? How long had she been the Chosen of Loviatar? How did these two meet? Was this destiny? All the thoughts. So, I continued it. Got really into it. Posted every chapter the second I finished it. But there was more I wanted to add, and I wanted to try writing better in general. And then I started doing rewrites and replacing every chapter with them, including the original so it would fit better with the new complete story. And of course, as I was doing my rewrites an idea came to me… what if they could still have a somewhat happily ever after? So, before I even finished the said rewrites I started on a sequel. There’s something wrong with my brain that it just won’t hush!! Hey, future me!